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13
Ito Mar 2014
13
A number so symbolic,
13
I frolic with the past,
I have a blast!
How can one number torture me so harshly!?

Anywhere I go I instill fear,
I sneer at the thought.
I look into my magic sphere...
and nothing is ever clear but one thing.
**13!
Myth that people who have 13 letters in their name are killers.
Ito Aug 2016
The night I met you,
you filled the void forever,
I felt loved and longed for...
A lie or my imagination,
I couldn't tell and I'd rather not know.

Every second I missed you,
I was being needy and you were new!
I've had my best moments when we were together,
regardless of the weather.
I'll always have my regrets.

I would still like to know the truth,
I'd fight for you in my youth,
I'd not care of the consequences,
Regardless of my senses.
**I'd lose it all to be with you...
7/31/2016  #Britney
Ito Aug 2015
My heart is chopped up like someone suicidal,
maybe I'm homicidal.
NO!  Those cuts never hurt,
instead they incited the inert.
Completely numb, confused and alone.

Was I born with a rotten heart?
Or did I never have one like a piece of art?
Could this be a cruel joke?
Will I join the '27 Club' as someone spoke?
Well I'm part of a black art.

You won't see me die,
not today, not tomorrow, not ever...
but you will see me cry forever.
I will fall apart,
all for you.
http://www.theguardian.com/music/musicblog/2015/apr/02/do-musicians-die-young-truth-27-club
Ito Sep 2020
There was once a man who enjoyed pain...
As if there was something to gain.
No one cared and he went for the knife.
Pain was all he knew his entire life.

Scars in the flesh & a wounded soul...
Now time has passed and the heart now a black hole.
Any love absorbed never to be returned.
All suitors burned.

Insincere smiles flashed to play the part...
He would never attract his sweetheart.
Always playing new roles against the odds.
A cruel joke in mortal form by the gods.

Since pain was all he knew,
his plans were already in queue.
New victims chosen yearly,
by the end he loved them dearly.
**He treasured his victims who wounds left when provoked.
Love is abstract and it can take many forms.
Ito Apr 2016
Today I wanted to die,
I imagined the plane crashing and exploding,
I dreamt of falling to my death,
I envisioned free-falling till I was like a bug...
yet I didn't want any of this.

I hoped my heart would stop on a caffeine overdose,
I wanted to be dead to be numb again,
I longed to feel empty and alone,
I couldn't feel tired knowing I failed...
**I wanted all of the pain, regret and disillusion.
4/25/2016
Ito Mar 2014
Note to mortals wandering in the dark:

I put my life on the line,
when I had one...
this was a sign,
then chills went up my spine,
I cringed at just the thought of you!

I got stabbed in the back,
I was just your snack.
I always knew zombies and vampires have friction,
but I thought it was all fiction.

Night creatures do not play in the sun,
they do play in the moonlight.
They feast and gorge on your flesh as they bite,
while they grip on tight.

Do not wander late at night,
*they will attack on site!
Ito Aug 2015
I wanted to know what God knows,
I longed to be the one He chose...
Guilty of superbia and plagued by pride,
I thought I was special but now I hide.
No shame in misbehaving for attention.

Now I have the Satan's eyes glued on me!
My fate is set and I cannot flee.
God just glances at me on occasion,
The Devil is strong at persuasion.
Black soul now filled with hope and dread.

Life is now austere.
The soul fades when demons are near.
Each one stealing the light and purity,
Now left in obscurity...
*Evil fades into darkness where I belong with surety.
Ito Mar 2014
Bleed* like me I *promise it will hurt.
That is how I flirt,
I run to sorrow,
I do not borrow...
I rob souls.

Do you accept this dark blessing?
I cannot guess...
but I will stress.
For I am heartless and artless.
There is an endless winter in my heart.
Ito Mar 2014
Galvanized hearts make up my past,
I wandered through perils that passed,
only found dread and despair.
This is my lair,
one of lonely existence.

Care to join on my endless quest of misery?
There's room enough for two!
None will pull the trigger,
to find the barrel empty...
Alas the days wane empty like me.
Ito Dec 2015
The blood we share runs in our veins,
I don't know why you're doing this and I'm still tied to chains!
"Stop it!  GET OFF ME!"
I may never be free...
Blood stains and no one will ever see it.

I alone in the dead of night
heard her cries full of fright.
Nothing I could do then or intervene,
I was not a witness to the actual scene.
No one knows what goes on behind closed doors.

The haunting of her cries play like a song,
so real and yet so wrong,
My recorder was dead
and maybe she was in her bed.
Neighbors have their secrets and I'm no one to meddle.
At 2:01AM I heard the voice of my neighbor whom I have never met while opening the window for some air screaming "GET OFF ME" the other voices were restraining her it seemed and it was over in 2 minutes.
Ito Jan 2017
Got into a car accident this morning and I left my phone in my car.Don't know how to reach you.  Just got home, car totaled and some muscle injury.  I'm fine overall.  This is not a poem.
Ito Feb 2017
From aftermath of the car accident,
I'm still left wondering how I'm alive...
I'm indebted to those who helped,
Shocked at the fragility of life,
And most of all thankful to God for another day.

Although the only things lost were material,
I lost a fraction of my soul,
reality is no longer the same,
from here on now I can only move forward.
One thing I did gain was experience, I'm a comeback kid!
January 30th 2017
Comeback Kid- A person who repeatedly demonstrates the propensity to overcome downturns or periods of bad publicity, and rebound to victory or popularity.
Ito Aug 2016
My only companion all of these years,
even after all the beers,
through all of the fears,
unheard by any ears...
Has always been music.

Emotions cannot be seen as well as they are felt,
not even with acting can they be given nor dealt,
only you feel what runs through your mind...
after all the pain settles you're left blind.
Love, Hate & Fear are as essential as the breath you take.

And then there are those who cannot love,
not even if it's kind of.
Those who love to hate,
think they're great,
**The cycle repeats until you're back listening to music again.
Ito Apr 2014
Enchanted* puppets created for misery.
Born out of flesh,
the minds were fresh,
distorted in a land of illusion,
Rotting figures out of twisted confusion.

Used and abused,
just fragile spirits,
questioning nothing in this reality.
Existence without a design,
set in a shrine of compulsory pain.

The shackles broke as they spoke,
now free like other folk.
Addicted to pain and drama,
they languished without the anguish.
They sought new strings that inflict trauma.
Humans are like puppets in that neither have control of their fate.

Stanza #1:  Enchanted flesh, fresh distorted figures
Stanza #1:  Since birth people's lives are already planned by families.

Stanza #2:  abused spirits nothing without pain
Stanza #2:  Humans always cause pain in their existence.

Stanza #3:  they like pain without trauma
Stanza #3:  People like to experience temporary pain
Ito Mar 2014
I die in a realm of agony,
where one rules with money.
I was a dark angel,
caressed by the darkness,
I was blessed.

Love... does not exist,
but it does persist.
The plot has a perverse twist!
My life was in danger,
forced to become a stranger.
Ito Jun 2016
I'm drowning in the regret of yesterday,
suffocating in the present,
strangled by the future.
I'm frozen in time,
no feelings and no colors.

To be numb is to be dumb,
I'd rather be a ***.
I feel something and nothing,
the pulse of pain and pleasure,
it lasts forever.

It's strange to be "alive" in a reality,
I could be dead and not know it,
I'm a dark artist who shines brightest at night!
I pretend to be a knight,
yet I'm a dark knight and no one can see **ME
Pain exudes truth.
Ito Mar 2014
I confided in you for aid,
afraid and alone you let me fade.
I'm a neglected flame you could not tame,
you ignite the blame again...
different people play the same game.

The world is infected with greed,
since birth it's a disease we don't heed.
The only cure is a double-edged sword... money.
Blue blood and water run through Earth,
yet both will dry for all their worth.

No one has a true clue,
everyone in an endless queue.
Life always has two views,
the unseen and the known hues.
The Blue Planet for the senseless suffering.
The irony of the word blue:  Blood, water and sadness.
Ito May 2014
Trapped in the routine,
we become mean,
forget about our kin.
Nothing matters until we win.
Final moments become eternal regrets.

Isolated, alone and without a cry,
that is how she chose to die.
Diamond, the dog who did not say bye.
Death may be silent...
but the trail of sorrow is so violent.

As light from the eyes fade,
an all too familiar shade,
even corpses resonate past love,
time helps memories shove,
in our youth we are immortal!
About an old family dog called Diamond who died several years ago.
Ito Apr 2014
You promised you would never become them.
The ones who hurt us the most,
now all you do is boast.
I guess you kept the promise...
you were the worst of them all!

Every day you kicked us out,
I wandered all night without a doubt...
the streets were warmer, quieter and safer.
Your whispers shouldn't be so deafening,
your stare filled with hate after taking us in.

One night you confessed to me a horror,
I never wanted to play the Priest!
Your twisted mind called us all The Beast!
You call it love but you only leak rage,
used to your abuse I became numb in your cage.

Switching family for strangers,
trading safety for new dangers,
I lost my mind too many times to care,
after all its only fair,
drown in your despair.
Ito Mar 2014
You* never made me *feel safe,
left me out in the street like a waif!
Receiving nothing but abuse...
you must have felt like Zeus!
All I ever wanted was a truce.

YOU always scavenge through my past,
sure it was a blast,
you should have just asked...
I protect you from the truth,
I'm just another wasted youth.

YOU just had to know,
it was the lowest blow.
I will never be the same...
I drank all of the blame,
surely you have no shame to maim.
Yes she exists.  Hidden message in italics:
1st stanza: All of the relationship was abuse
2nd stanza: I told her all of my past.
3rd stanza: Personifying hate as a prideful person I know.
Ito Oct 2015
God I promise I tried my best,
I long to be like you but I'm stressed,
I knew since I was conscious that I was blessed,
I'm a sinner that never takes rest,
you're always there who would have guessed?

Living in a land with temptation at every turn,
I know I have a lot to learn...
but you are too stern.
I live in fear and with concern,
instead of another flood can we just burn?

I have made you an enemy,
I have been my own enemy...
Upon death can I be in your presence for one second?
I would hope you can pretend to beckon.
My heart and soul belong to you only; you're my *family.
3rd Stanza inspired by "Enemy" from Flyleaf lyrics:
"I have made you an enemy"
"I have been my own enemy"
Ito Mar 2014
I gazed into Pandora's Box,
went blind from the clocks.
Would you dare do what I did?
I was just a kid...
No warning for the mourning of my innocence.

No mortal should ever view,
I will never be free... this, I knew.
I could not flee this time.
I left my sanity on the shelf,
I committed a crime unto thyself.

Heed my warning:
RUN RUN RUN!
Knowledge is not fun,
Locked in a tower of misery for eternity.

If you thirst,
do as you must,
you have been warned!
~Ito
An artifact in Greek mythology given to Pandora which contained all of the evils of the world.  

Metaphor:  With today's technology it is possible to know all of evils of the world if you choose to do so.
Fog
Ito Dec 2015
Fog
The night grew dark and fog surrounded me,
I couldn't run or flee.
Unsure if I'm imaginary or real anymore,
at this point I don't think my soul can restore.
Long days and eternal nights continue forever.

Destitute and poor.
And yet in my mind there is grandeur,
it seems I can help the world...
but I can't help myself with a destiny that is whorled.
I am not whole and I am not invisible just in between.

Like a ghost I have no place and no purpose,
passing time in an endless journey that's worthless.
I love and despise pain
because I am profane.
*Too ashamed to live and yet too proud to die.
My view on life after leaving work.  Who am I?  Why am I here?  What's the purpose of it all?
Ito Mar 2014
Promises* are meant to be broken,
the heart is *never
meant to be shattered,
you let me down,
you saw me as a clown,
now I own the town's crown.

For wherever you go there is betrayal,
I am pale,
your love is fatal,
but I am grateful.
The days bleed and go by,
you will cry,
you force me to scry.

Stay atop your spire,
while I admire,
I thought you had a lyre,
I realized you were a liar!
You were blinded by greed,
so take heed as I speed...
Remastered.  Originally titled "Shattered Dreams".
Ito Jan 2016
When I am frail and weak,
will you still care for me as you speak?
I doubt it!
My sisters took a hit!
Everyone tries to believe in true love.

When I'm insane and wreckless,
I hope you can guess...
you won't know what I mean,
it's in that one gene.
Trapped into existence because of genetics.

I hate you but I feel so much passion,
I wish your love was a ration,
you give out way too much sometimes,
it makes me guilty of many crimes.
Will you care for this fail and weak soul?
This is no disease, it's just "love".  It's the agony that one feels in their existence when another is not there.
Ito Mar 2014
Winter stopped hearts in all parts,
cold shoulders topped the charts!
It's as if the world stood still forever,
someone hit the lever.
Water had never been so clever.

Ice, a master of chaos on the roads!
Cars changed into curling stones,
shovels became part of your bones,
animals transformed into statues,
eyes could not shed a tear.

Salt flees from your tears,
thoughts shrouded in fears.
An eternal winter so brutal,
it crystallized people's very existence,
icy souls now reside in Chicago.
The most brutal Winter of my life.  3.14.2014
Ito Apr 2014
Photos are fragments of time,
never meant to exist,
parables of the past become a talk.
Do you get the gist?

A sorrowful and joyful experience,
as you gaze at your life,
from another view.
We're all animals in a cage,
clueless and content.

In our fragile existence,
one thing is secure:
A mark in time at our final hour.
Is time meant to be shattered in this way for our own use?
Ito Apr 2014
A raven once said "hate doesn't equate direct hate"...
you might just be bait,
could it be your trait?
In this world nothing is guaranteed,
the human race is but another ****!

Another crying child!
No matter!
They arrive in the wild!
Left to fend for themselves in a world unknown...
Just remember they are grown.
Ito Apr 2015
When tears burn but you touch your heart...
and there's no pulse.
Is this the end or a new start?
No longer with any impulse.
Numb and thoughtless I fall apart.

Those whispers are just me yelling.
You should know for every truth there is a lie,
My sight is always rebelling.
The one who never cares is the first to die,
I will watch my own demise.

Impending doom never felt so good,
an existence without purpose or joy,
take a chance to get back in those chains like you should,
money or starvation there's no in between poor boy,
just a common counterfeit more than I am understood.
Ito Jul 2015
Your pain is so great... nothing left for me to do,
it's what I always knew,
with old age comes sorrow and death,
I'd give you my breath,
that would only be temporary.

Your agony sends night terrors to me,
nowhere to flee!
The terror sets in on you and I.
I can only cry,
but I know I need to say goodbye.

You will always be in my heart,
you will not die at the hospital but we will part,
met you too late in life,
our time was cut with a knife.
Those who abandoned you forgot you but I never will.
We rescued a Pomeranian a few years ago who was abandoned and has been amazing.  Recently her legs are failing her, she has her good days and her bad days.  We do everything we can for her but an operation is not guaranteed to leave her well.  For her, this poem is dedicated to Anabelle.
Ito Dec 2016
The day you said you didn't feel the same,
My mind did mental gymnastics.
I gazed deep into space for days at a time.
All I could do is stare,
memories that never became true just like you.

My heart sank like a corpse weighed down in the ocean,
I knew I drank Cupid's potion,
my body numb at your touch,
my reasoning clouded by your voice,
my vision blinded by your image.

A gaze too intense,
a kiss so fleeting,
a touch so heavy,
an exchange of harsh words,
I can only stare at the padded white walls.
Ito May 2016
I died today and went to Hell,
I was destined for this place, oh well!
I loved the people there,
we all got along even if there wasn't a prayer,
Not a Prayer for him or her or it.

At least I felt the pain tonight,
the thorns of love made me write...
I feel my heart pours out emotions too deep to consider,
in the past I'd sell my emotions to the highest bidder.
Beauty and insanity go well together but all is overlooked.

Yet I'm weakest when I love anything or* anyone,
it gives me purpose even when I have *none,

I care for it, them or* myself,
It's crazy thinking I never cared to love myself left on a *shelf...

Somewhere in the past like an old, outdated book I'm lost forever.
Random feelings of today and fun new experiences.  The usual #&#*!(#@)! lol
Ito Feb 2014
If profanity is a form of insanity,
then all of humanity is in love with vanity.
Just another delusion of illusion,
in a rampant act of seclusion.
Talent is standard on a planet of confabulation.

Nothing is real anymore,
there is a war at your core.
Greed is the seed we breed,
hence the human race in which we speed!
We play games of hunger while we bleed.

Humanity is just an art form,
unfinished and diminished.
We are blessed with stress,
without our consent we play chess.
I confess my address...

-Earth-
**Motel for our souls
A tragic and cryptic poem.  Intent:  To elicit thought.
Ito Mar 2014
Old memories are like ghosts that haunt you,
No one can resist it but it's true.
Pacify the past with the present,
forget the present with the past,
the unrelenting future torment that I ask.

If there is a past, present and future...
gaps in time must exist like a suture.
You get the deal?
Nothing is real.
No one knows anything at birth or death.

Your thoughts finally materialize,
as you realize:
time has little pity,
sure you were pretty,
memories are fragments of time that are witty.
Stanza #1:  Ghosts resist past/present/future (memories always come back)
Stanza #2:  Future time deal real death (morbid but self-explanatory)
Stanza #3:  Finally you pity pretty memories (You will never get back time)
Ito Sep 2016
I've got the perfect body,
yet I wish I was somebody,
I've got the perfect voice,
yet I feel I have no choice.
I have the perfect life for someone else...

I hide in the shadows in the daylight.
I only come out at night.
My soul is a black hole,
with only one goal...
to absorb the light you possess.

My heart is scarred from trying to love,
I can make a heart stop with a quick shove.
Never caught in the dark,
it's my birthmark.
**Etched to exist in constant joy to sin.
Ito Sep 2016
There's an emptiness in my eyes,
it's as if someone dies.
And although that (someone) is me,
I feel free!
For every day is a shadow of the reflection from yesterday.'

The bright glow of my soul is now but a fading, faint light,
at the bottom of the ocean like the darkness of the night.
Shadows upon shadows while I breakdown in your arms,
I'd wait till they set the alarms...
**As I run back to the prison set in my mind.
Heartbreak, death and misery all put together.
Ito Feb 2014
I have the hardest of hearts,
love does not exist in these parts...
there are no new starts.
I reside in a realm of guilt,
this is where I wilt.

I know thyself,
I have flaws.
My kingdom has fatal laws.
Run!  For I am no hero!
I am prince of endless solitude!

A heart so dark,
no one can start the spark...
Hearts galore in my jar of hearts.
Perpetual darkness ensues,
for there lies a black hole in my heart!
Ito Apr 2016
How I love you!
I overlook what's true!
You still have my admiration,
you were meant to rule a nation,
I will always learn to hate you.

Little by little you rip me to pieces,
even as the hate increases,
I'm equally as messed up,
yet you and I will never hookup.
**You guaranteed your fate by your ignorance.
Ito Sep 2014
Today I went out...
felt the wind touch me with doubt,
no feeling in my heart even with a shout,
either way I still played the role.
Smiled to an existence out of my control.

Life continues with or without you,
the light stolen from my eyes,
the touch numbed by cries,
my hope was to become wise,
but everyone dies.
Ito May 2016
Tonight I'm dying again (drinking),
but my best friend is here (liquor),
all my friends forgot about me but not HIM!
Of course He's my best kept secret,
Secrets are always the best when two people know them.

I need to relax He's there,
I need to party and He's always available,
I want to drown sorrow and You have the antidote,
I feel lonely and You're there somehow?!
My best friend and worst enemy.

My father drowned at the bottle,
my mom dealt with HIM with the orange bottle (HER),
I ran from both and ran into both HER and HIM,
therefore, I will die from both or survive them both.
At my lowest... I rise!
Ito Feb 2016
There's a ghost inside me...
apparently I owe a fee,
I've known it since birth,
it's pointless to have a voice for all it's worth.
**Every day I die inside and outside.
I'm always lost, so I took up the name Lost Realist 3 and felt like writing a poem.
Ito Apr 2014
All the world's a stage
as I age without a wage,
In all my rage
I realize I'm in a cage,
I fail to turn the page.

Another day lost in this reality
arrested only by morality,
have I gone too far?
Time makes another scar,
deep and infected.

My vitality is only clouded by you,
driving again with no destination again...
Wanting to be part of something new.
I'm given another cue,
flawless and without hesitation I continue,
on this strange play called LIFE.
Ito May 2020
Today I write with a heaviness in my heart...
The love I thought so dear was someone just playing the part...
The pictures and moments will always stay within my soul.  The arguments nonexistent, no hate only pain.

Sometimes love can evaporate like alcohol on a deep wound.  The sting as harsh as being put into the cold ground.
Unrequited love is the saddest thing to discover when things are not always in our control.
I could not have aimed for higher goal.
I am not perfect and perhaps my thoughts scared you away...  then again life is a learning process where love hurts.
My relationship longest relationship with someone I thought was the love of my life.
Ito Jul 2014
Love* is the most powerful force of all...
wars* are created until we fall.
The heart is made of glass,
past love cuts deep into us,
only severed memories remain to discuss.

Love decays in the mind,
maybe we go blind?
Consumed by work we forget the word,
lines between love and hate become blurred.
Only love can escape and bring *death.
Love can be a destructive and creative force.  A true double-edged sword that keeps its prisoners.
Ito Apr 2014
The perfect man does not exist,
but he does persist.
I wander the realms of the unknown,
only to find my clone.

I do not exist in this reality.
No one knows me... I have NO mortality!
I break hearts,
I fake arts.

If you want me to vanish,
Banish me again only to punish,
One day I will return the favor,
And then you may ******* bravery.

May your days be as brutal as mine futile,
love is lethal,
love is evil,
**love is everything and nothing.
Ito May 2015
I've got a place no one can find,
try looking for a place that doesn't exist,
you have to meet me here,
I don't let anyone know of this,
night or day just say my name.

Michael like the Archangel,
you're my guardian angel though a blue angel,
the smoke I inhale is a blessing,
I know I shouldn't be messing and I'm stressing,
the realm I face is fatal and ethereal.

What if it's you?
And it wasn't me?
Why do I have to taste poison to die?
I want more even if death is all mental,
all I deserve is another high.
Ito Mar 2014
Nowhere near the light at the end of the tunnel,
I poured my sorrow into a funnel,
I wander in desperate dread,
only to find the dead.
After the storms of time,
pain inhabited me like I'd been guilty of a crime.
Darkness and confusion set into my soul,
I came back haunted but whole...

Somewhere lurking behind,
the broken thoughts of my mind,
They long to be forgotten...
descending into oblivion and rotten.
Stanza #1:  I wander dead
Stanza #2:  Storms of darkness came
Stanza #3:  Somewhere broken thoughts long oblivion
Ito Sep 2015
Everybody is dying,
some faster than others,
alcoholics gambling with fate,
drinking every last drop of death,
while cancerous tributes weep every hour.

It's God's way...
of saying we are not in control.
Science says we know it all but a new disease,
can cause infertility,
can cause insanity,
even suffocation.

The millions we leave are spent,
our funeral is grand,
our memories are laughs,
our families content,
it all *ends.
Yes this is an indirect message to Donald Trump & it will not reach him regardless of how many people he has working for him, he is simply a pawn in the media/system for a better candidate.
Ito Sep 2014
Tonight without a thought, I ran in the midnight.
Wrong from right was just black and white.
I found reason to be a liar too many times before.
I ignited something too hard to put out, an inferno!
The night grew as long as my life and I was lost...

I became everything I hated and feared,
my name I smeared.
I let myself down by running the town,
More reckless and thoughtless I wore a crown!
The pavement soon turned into a road...

Fell off the highway into a ditch,
I didn't even twitch!
No where to go, I pretend to die.
I knew this was just another lie.
*My shadow caught up to me by morning and I sigh.
Unfinished poem on a previous night in my past.
Ito Feb 2014
I am a tortured soul,
perhaps a demon calculating a goal!
Trapped in this body,
I feel shoddy...
Just another eternity of melancholy.

Emotions do not exist in my domain,
I simply drain where I reign.
Nothing exists only pain.
No rain ever falls here,
I confess...I am a **seer.
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