To, the love of my life.

Last night I sat outside in the corridor. The place where the two buildings met, where there was a cold wind blowing.
I shivered, but it was a good kind of shiver, you know? The one you would gladly take, because along with it came absolute peace. The knowledge that everyone was asleep, and you had the night to yourself.

The buildings with the lights still on looked like stars, and reminded me of pablo neruda's poetry, you know "tonight I can write the saddest lines"?.
But no sad lines would come to me tonight, I was at peace.
I could have cried and laughed and danced and there would have been no one to see, no one to hear. The phrase 'dance like nobody's watching' would have applied well, because nobody, was watching.

So why? When I was revelling in this silent night, did I think of you?
Why did I wish you were here.
Granted, I was happy on my own.
So why did I think you to hold me in your arms?
Why did I want to hear your voice?
Why did I want you to watch me dance?

Why did I want to break this godly silence?

I would rather be here with you.

still theres a tiny drop left in me
red and golden
wet with anticipation
To give to you
take my blood, as you have have taken my soul.
Oh, be happy for me.

i wont sacrifice my thousand breaths for your one, ill give them all for nothing.
if only you would look at me, look at me, and say you know.
Say you know me.

I shall not want health in your sickness nor shall I rejoice in your pain.
I will only bleed when you need me.
Better you than me.

I would die inch by inch to add a little more to your smile.
And relish the ache if it brings back the fire in your eyes.
Oh my love.

*Better you, than me

Remember the long ago when we lay together
In a pain of tenderness and counted
Our dreams: long summer afternoons
When the whistling-thrush released
A deep sweet secret on the trembling air;
Blackbird on the wing, bird of the forest shadows,
Black rose in the long ago summer,
This was your song:
It isn’t time that’s passing by,
It is you and I.
— Ruskin Bond

I broke a heart.

Crushed it under my toe.

Like a China plate, pieces pieces on the floor.

They cut me too.