Daddy always said I had a good head on my shoulders
But I'm wondering how it's holding up as I'm growing older
It seems like the world is only growing colder
Words as weapons and guns coming out of their holsters
Things aren't the same since you were alive
I've really changed since that night that you died
I can't tell you how many nights I've lost to the tears that I've cried
My jaw is tired from holding this bullet I have to bite
To get through these hard times
What could I have done to deserve
You being stolen from my life?
You won't be there to walk me down the aisle
On my big day when I become someone's wife
You aren't here to help me when I struggle
When days seem filled only with strife

My world just keeps on changing
And there's no one here for me explaining
"It's ok, you can do this, there's so many things you'll be gaining"

See to me I just figured you'd always be around
Or at least until I got my feet on some solid ground
If there's anything that I've found
Is more sooner than later you're the one 6 feet down

So in the mean time I guess I'll just keep being confused
Being lonely
Learning from the abuse
Because that's all I can do
Now that my life doesn't have you
I'll miss you every single day
All the bad parts of you too
I'm sure one day I'll figure it out
Hopefully before I'm dead and blue

Honey, sweet fresh warm smooth

You're my bee and I'm your flower
I love you more with each passing hour
The bee to my bloom
The sun to my moon
The sound of your voice is my favorite tune

Buzzing with life
I warm to your touch
I need you to know I love you so much
There's never a morning or an end to a night
Where I don't think of you before I turn out the light

I love when you smile I love your big hugs
I love when you're thinking and I love your smirks and your shrugs
You give me a look and it gives my heart a tug

I know sometimes I seem only covered with thorns
But when I'm without you my heart is torn
When you hurt I hurt
If you push me away I'll always return

Our lives are heading in different directions
But you'll always hold my deepest affections
You can laugh at my stupid rhymes all you want
but I hope you read them to pass you the time when I'm gone

Don't ever feel lonely or scared or abandoned
Through the dark times I'll remain a close companion

I love you, peach
Wherever you are my love will always reach
No matter how far, or difficult the road
You'll always be my bee and I'll always be your rose

Look at the sun look at the moon
Tell me how can you leave so soon
Look at the stars as they reflect in my eyes
Tell me sweet nothings, nothing but lies
Look at my face that looks just like you
My hands, my lips and my feet do too
Look at my skin so fragile and pale
You try your excuses to no avail.

Not a thing you can do not a word you can say
Can ever make right the games that you played
Blood of my blood but not of my soul
I'll never regain the childhood that you stole.

Can I pretend I am a dragon if that means you'll be my flame?
A dark gray filled-up rain cloud if that means you'll be my rain?
A robin to my batman,
A bronze to my brains?
And when we're old we'll both walk the block leaning on our canes?

Tiny
Fingernails
There is
Not even a
heart beat
to destroy yet
No brain developed
to hook on nicotine
No eyes to shed hot tears
No hair to turn gray
Not big enough to really call a
human being
Small
Pitiful
Little
Tiny
Ball of
cells

You stole the wind from my lungs
And the ligaments connecting my bones held together by your touch were broken
Each nucleus of every cell looking to you for inspiration to continue humming with the rhythm of happiness is quiet
Beneath my sternum is a canyon that aches
Beneath my wrists are hands that shake
Beneath my nose is a smile that's fake
My body is tired from hoping to be admired
You stole all desire to keep alive this fire

Sad soul looking for something in life to inspire me
Used to be
Nothing could stop me now
I'm just too ******* tired, see--
Life with ease
Just isn't in my expertise  
"Could you be less dramatic, please"
Not really, actually...  
Usually
I don't talk about it--  
I keep it to myself
Hide all my problems on the highest shelf
Note to self
If you need help
Pop a pill and let it melt
Watch as colors blur and stir
Forgotten feelings of
Pure bliss
Weightlessness
and happiness
you thought had Died
along with your innocence
It's ******* isn't it
But picture it
You are a blank canvas
You are a lotus flower
Rising from the black abyss
Blooming zooming moving
Towards the top and the sky doesn't exist
But clouds have a funny way of providing more than just rain
The white is stained with pain
You feel like all your molecules
have been rearranged
The world looks strange nothing in it's right place
It's cool just go get *******
Let the poison erase
All but a trace
Say goodbye to this place
You're moving on
Way past gone as you try to remember what it was like
To feel normal
Like lyrics of a forgotten song