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6.5k · Jan 2019
jas Jan 2019
my life has been ripped to shreds
my heart has been ripped apart
instead of living
I want to be dead

I want to be rid
of all this guilt

you don't understand
how I feel this way
it's comprised
and you're the delay

I've been broken
and beaten
to the core

its been years
I kicked you out the door

yet you're still here
haunting me
I can't find a way to breathe
can you believe
all of the damage you've caused me
in this lifetime

must be a record
when I put it together
if it's not me it's her
I've been hurting too long
been put in the wrong
and it's just too much

can't believe you ripped me to shreds
into tiny pieces
I let you lead me on
all along
so my mistake
wouldn't have it any other way
I'm already gone

ripped into pieces
none of me is decent
that's left

youtube instrumental love hate hurt shred ripped apart left no yes hard
4.4k · Aug 2018
drunk yet sober.
jas Aug 2018
***** and whiskey
mind gets slippery
uneven slopes down your body of..
one day, to understand
pessimistic feelings
fading away in the distance of ones thoughts
for moments of time
moments of life
within the reach of my fingers
i can feel the exit on the tip of my grasp
subzero liquor bottles numb my soul inside
as i take a sip that drips down my spine
over an uneasy stomach
words ***** as i open my mouth to
certain sentiments boiled deep into a gut wrenching void
of living with distant reflections
intoxicated thoughts tangled in the brain.
4.0k · Aug 2018
jas Aug 2018
its you girl
always in my mind
even in my dreams
from the day that i wake till the moment that i sleep
never leaving me
and i've never pushed myself to ever seek
anyone but you
your'e the moment that i started living
that my heart started feeling
i started healing..


its you girl
you're the one for me
its you girl
you're my destiny
its always been youuuuu

****, always been by my side
kept it real all the time
never had to ever lie
that's true
something i didn't know i needed
can't ever deny the truth
girl , its always been youuu.
morena \ instrumental base de rap **** by la loquera. on youtube  inspired me
3.1k · Aug 2018
finding a soulmate
jas Aug 2018
love is not what love is or what love used to be
love grows. and love grew inside of me for the very first time.
true love that is, love that i thought would never exist except in movies or my favorite romance novels.
imagine falling in love with your best friend, unknowingly.
days pass you by and the sun shines on a sun-kissed face,
embracing all of life beauties. without knowing you fell for love of everything.
love of life, the trees, the universe, people and those who inhabit your life.
every small thing became big, within reach was possibility.
for new chances, changes, and that's when it hit you.
like a brick, like bricks, like the titanic came and sunk on your heart , on your whole body even
in the most angelic way, your heart was full of life, of peace, unity of the most purest form of love.
seeing their face for the first time after that was mesmerizing.
tiny butterflies filled your stomach, any chance to talk to , to be in their presence, fighting the urge to jump into a full of *** rage.
blood running warm between your veins , melting away deep inside your body.
if only they could notice you...
until the end, is where this story gets better.
perhaps , a fairy tale ending is in store for you, or perhaps the best is saved for last.
perhaps, a few exchanged glances, a small grin at your jokes, a simple brush against the arm, leaves an open discussion of flirtation.
fluttering of the hearts , engaging in more than a friendship, but an assurance.
completely lost from the start, we somehow found ourselves tangled deep into the web of mystery.
when we reach the end, remember it is also the beginning of a love so true,
reciprocating feelings deep inside, where both parties can know longer hide it.
to fight the urge to not love, is torture in the deepest form.
love is what love was, and love grows into something more.
love grew into my soulmate.

                                             with love,
                                                        a soul.
Grammer is not important , unless it is. don't bother.
this is why i need an editor, oops...
(take a shot how many times i said love, LOL)
perhaps, this isn't a poem.
2.3k · Jun 2020
savage love
jas Jun 2020
should have known from the very start
you were only going to break my heart
why oh why didn't I see the signs
should have known every day I cried

begging you to love me right
all you ever stayed was quiet
they weren't lying when they say love is blind
couldn't lose you without a fight

but you proved me wrong
over and over again

savage love
you really broke me
savage love
why can't you see
what we coulda been
written to the beat of savage love - jawsh 685
1.5k · Jan 2018
jas Jan 2018
this one is for you, ... baby girl
its yours
im yours
all of this time
getting to know you
all of this time
digging into your soul

and I swear that I found treasure
no one else could measure
up to you
**** girl, a dream come true

all my life
I've been done wrong
all of my life
its been so long
since I could find somebody to love

mesmerizing you are

all of my life
and you
are timeless.

one of life's greatest mysteries
to be stumbled upon
that's how I know in the end
this is love.
this one's for you girl,
all of my life
getting to know you
all of this time
it's timeless.
day 20 of 365
inspired by "rose" on YouTube / instrumentals
1.1k · Dec 2017
jas Dec 2017
I've come to the conclusion
I am two parts of a whole
you may look at the glass half empty
or half full
sometimes it's really hard to tell
but call me a Gemini , if you will

behind closed doors
I'm either high
or low
one minute I'm soaring
& the next on the floor

one half of me
battles depression & anxiety
my thoughts are scattered inconsistently
my heart pounds in my chest
the minute you speak my name
just know I'm doing my best
trying not to go insane

other days I'm free
gliding thru the breeze
of my life
energetically speaking
the sun dances around me
against my face, glistening

but I seldom wonder
the thin wall that divides me
if I should ever sunder
two halves of a broken heart
searching for the glue that once held them part

Gemini's are twins
such like, good and evil
an angel and a demon
dancing on my shoulders
dragging me farther and farther away
so in the eyes of the beholder
I sense the middle becoming yet much colder

judgment is given on the evil side of me
I'm distant , I admit it
at times , fairly resistant
a poor trait one must receive
nothing more than a peeve

alas I did not select this trait
nor must I choose to accept it
my slump has taken its toll
I do not wish to see anything as it is but dull
I may be present and alive
yet inside, negatively drains my mind

I pray that good outweighs the unfavorable
that you may overlook how I'm unstable
my bright eyes & tinted cheeks
how I simply ignore my urge to be weak
for in that one moment
I've experienced a whole heartbeat

ultimately, there is no escaping
no path could lead me elsewhere away from thee
no debating
I am not one but two parts of a whole
one day I hope I am in control

the twins
its me
& I am them
jas Aug 2018
we all coexist within another.
father time, granting us a constant movement of life
a cloaked, bearded man with the power of an hourglass.
an endless cycle of highs and lows effecting the world
as above so below.
alas, without love, the earth would turn to dust
drawn together, since the beginning of eternity
father time founded mother earth.
intertwined out of chaos, a nurturer was born.
to create out of love,
trees alongside the sea
time never catching up to the speed of light
equality of the unknown, transpiring its purpose to live
granted, the universe aligns in peace
nirvana at its peak
solely, as an individiual
we seek the hidden purpose
beyond ones navigation of life
742 · Aug 2018
jas Aug 2018
you make me glow with you
shine the light
on my dear heart
this love is something you can't find
they don't teach you in the books
it's real life
its one of a kind
i'm glowing ..
733 · Apr 2018
jas Apr 2018
stay up all night
my eyes are red from crying
ask me how did i sleep
i say, "just fine"

i admit i haven't been alright

its just one of those days
but its everyday
and i never have the urge to change

something inside
its different in me..
no longer alive
i don't even breathe

a prisoner in disguise
a prisoner in my own mind
in my bed full of lies

academy award for the actress I've become
726 · Jan 2018
page 1 of 365...
jas Jan 2018
hello. its me.
alive and breathing
walking into a new chapter
of a new book
of my auto biography.

mentally I've grown.
new state of mind
developed in an essence of my own.

one year.
me, myself & I
three hundred & sixty five
of my life

welcoming new opportunities
embracing changes
yet to come
here's to page 1.
711 · Jan 2019
he ain’t you
jas Jan 2019
don’t worry bout me
just worry bout yourself
i know you seen me with somebody else
right by my side
wishing you were mine
but boy you know it’s past your time

it’s sad to say
karma got in your way
who can you blame
but yourself

you’re the reason i moved on
your the reason i found the right one

he ain’t you

treats me better than i deserve
loves me harder
like i’m worth
more than enough
to be his girl
this world i’m living is a fairytale
i don’t know
what i did
to deserve a man like this
an angel sent from heaven
i guess god heard my prayers


memories scarred in my brain
it’s getting easier to erase
the memory of you
and how i was made the fool
i was too young and naive
what i faced
i couldn’t believe
to be continued...  
inspired by instrumental of boogie with a hoodie , look back at it on youtube.
687 · Aug 2018
jas Aug 2018
my dreams turned to nightmares
and i'm afraid
i'm not getting anywhere
running circles passing myself by

day in , day out
the seasons may change but i never do.
always the same
i wake up the next day and its always the ******* same
my life is stuck on repeat like starting over a game
that you lost but i'm getting nowhere
not learning anything to help me repair
its all too much and not enough.
the CD has a scratch that i cannot buff
much like my problems, i'm so fed up.
screaming in my head 'like what the ****'
life goes on, and i'm still messed up.

my dreams turned to nightmares
and i'm afraid
i'm not getting anywhere
running circles passing myself by

life is funny , fate misleads
what does it cost to just be free?
the devil is waiting to be unleashed
into a never ending circle
to be continued...
674 · Jun 2019
planning an escape
jas Jun 2019
this narrative has had its wear and tear
down to the last page that slips effortlessly off the book
pulling back strings to fit the ending
live action marionette

indulging in countless ways to flee
how could I ever?
eyes like a hawk vigourously watching over me
planning to escape is mind altering

hearts injecting blood a million miles per second
hold my breath as the goosebumps trickle under my spine
fingers twitching with rage
it's time to break out of this cage

sweat seeps off my face
leaving a line of dirt
momentarily, battle scars

I knew this day would come
just sooner than expected
but what did I expect?

existing, just barely
imprisoned in this jest of reality
caught between the societies realm of a fantasy
or breaking the barriers and taking a leap

numerous routes that divide into alternating states
yet the predominant remains
intimidation haunts me
crowding my thoughts

I always thought hell existed deep in my mentality
these dark memories combating to come to the surface
until one day I blinked and realized
hell is neighboring me

hell is leisures from the past that overstays their welcome
hell is energy deteriorating in souls you've attached to
hell is being starved of communication
hell is the strings penetrating your every move
hell is receiving no feedback from the energy you put out
hell is taking your last breath every day just to wake up to the same old *******
hell is repeating "go f### yourself", and its never going to stop

left for dead
in dire need of an escape
this is me sending a signal
sos, ... save me

planning this scheme for too long takes a toll on my soul
confusing reality with a dream
is this authentic or a figment of my imagination
am I hallucinating?

waited ages for an escape
overwhelmed over things I have no command over
will this justify the end?
and leave no cliffhangers to deal with repercussions
that is my chaotic life

an arrogant scenario to arise from
669 · Apr 2018
jas Apr 2018
the sun graces her skin
just a touch to fall in love
warmth fills the heart

ah , her.

melting of my soul
blends well into hers
the future is unknown
yet love carries blindly told

ah , her

into existence
she is one
and is the one
& only
for me

ahhhhh , ... her
623 · Jan 2018
second chances
jas Jan 2018
running out of options
we've been thru this once before
reminiscing on the past
for a second chance
fighting for another possibility
neglecting the doors to re-open

is this the end or the beginning?

you tell me..
day two of 365
600 · Jan 2018
jas Jan 2018
ok. my mind is implemented with scars. how I've been done wrong. I was kicked, beaten, torn apart. stuck myself in a black hole. to be undiscovered because love hurts, it hurts.

thoughts on my brain
viruses making me go insane
help. its seeping out my veins
oozing from the beneath the surface
its not worth it
let me go, with my mouth filled with foam
life's on the line
running out of time
getting left behind
nothing you can do I promise im fine
I'll be alright
don't you come back tonight

I'm on fire
body's burning
hearts scorched and burned
from the point of no return
of all the things I've learned

& I pray to God
I know you're listening
so hear me
from the clouds
fighting all my demons
begging to be free of them
of him
seeping back into my skin

scars, make me who I am
till the very end
maybe one day, no more hurting
I'll crawl out of this black hole
escaping this darkness.
day three of 365
587 · Jun 2018
s\o to you.. *explicit*
jas Jun 2018
im sorry...

pour a shot
shoot me in the f*kn head
this **** is explicit
im on my knees at the edge of my bed
just prayin
lord save me
from all the sorrow
all the tears
i spent my whole life living in fear

broken hearted
torn apart
limb by mfn limb
if love is a sin
send my *** to hell
every task i try turns to dust and i fckn fail
i keep asking for signs like my *** aint blind
never ever did i learn to read braille

this is the end of the beginning

im sorry..

to put 100% effort into all that was worth it
the future
love doesn't last unless its lust
if just for a moment
my body is just like a catacomb
tore my heart right out of my chest
and now im in debt
for the rest ..of my mfn life
enough is enough
im signing over my got **** rights
of this life
581 · Jan 2018
two- faced
jas Jan 2018
me vs. me
battle or war?
on the other hand
what you see against what you don't
interesting theory.

you see what I want you to see
you see what you perceive of me
what your mind believes
but is that truly me?

perhaps not.
so perhaps call me two faced
i admit i have two sides
one for the show
and one behind the curtains.

oh, close minded individual
open you eyes
what do you see
surely, it's not me.
day 8 of 365
567 · Aug 2018
craving you
jas Aug 2018
the taste of liquor on your lips drives me
goosebumps thrive on the back of my neck
irresistible touch
traces of your sultry skin
eating me up inside

i'm drunk

548 · Aug 2018
‘when i get there‘
jas Aug 2018
your soul sends me good luck when i endure it
never ending
much like a disease
forever pending , on accountability
of a sensing...
i know you want to indulge in a certain life
that was made for you
beyond time
nothing could resist
your lips taste of honey
your mind so pure
your body is a temple
a goddess
searched near and far
when i find you ,i won’t let go
imagine when i get there
545 · Feb 2018
jas Feb 2018
leave me to rot in this grave that              reeks of depression
            grasping for a fresh breath
                  dirt filled nails on my worn out fingers
                                        left with a weary spirit
                                                          ­ I've lost the will to exist

perhaps this is the end of the end.
537 · Dec 2017
(your a ) ... disease
jas Dec 2017
sickness in me
you resemble a disease
makes me
a bit queasy
the needles slippery
yet I need to feed
to bleed
to feel needed
even if this feeling is uneasy

you make me sick
like a disease
I beg for at my knees
a mere touch
a peculiar taste

I find myself wasting away
at the bottom of an ashtray
burnt out
exhumed with fumes
beginning of a drought

with this disease
in pursuit of a vaccine
ending of deceit
and a desire to feel complete
526 · Sep 2018
come back
jas Sep 2018
i knew she had been crying
her face red, and her eyes were glazed
small chuckles followed by a crack in her voice
straight looks out the window,
unsure what to ask her
i kept the radio for noise
took her some drinks
a shot from the bottle drowned the silent cries
alcohol was the disguise
and yet she kept quiet about her tears
and i acted like i didn't hear
driving her home
i wished her goodnight
to wake up the next morning in fright

she was gone...

if only i could discover what demons she was facing
if only i could be the one who ended up saving her
but alas, i wasn't

she's gone now and i keep thinking about our night in the truck
492 · May 2019
jas May 2019
you are the most beautiful person i've ever accepted into my life
my heart tingles sending electrifying waves straight through my veins
drawing ever sense of mine to
your soul

the power of connection that brings two spiritual beings to collide into one is indefinite
your aura annexes the neurons traveling throughout my body

this path appeared without my knowledge of intertwining fate
in where I'd never encounter a most perfect individual
one full of the universe multiplied by years of worth

till the end of time and back, for there is no death of a soul
if I could just freeze this ripple in time where our bodies encounter
with a warm intoxicating embrace
so exhilarating,

in this life that exists today,
I'm delighted to have accompanied your presence
an aesthetically pleasing inner being

one that encourages me to have a better perception of existing
to live life vicariously with a passion

a mentor
beloved friend
one who reads my soul like an open book

you are my soul and I am your mate.
influential in every way
the words that you say
leave me crazy
but in a good way
I swear

i've been putting my actions into words
I cannot compare to observe
so if you, you know

my soulmate
i wrote this for one of my dear friends i enjoy. much love for you - p
490 · May 2018
wrong path
jas May 2018
your heart is black
you taste like honey
don’t care about anyone but the money
retrace your steps back to where our paths crossed
went left & that’s where you went wrong
i followed you and your impure thoughts

lick my lips as you taste so sweet
too bad your soul is as dead as can be
but there is no stopping me
from falling in love
with the wrong things
490 · Mar 2019
jas Mar 2019
I'm tired of trying
i just don't think
I can do this anymore
with all of my pain
tell me what's keeping me out the door
i just don't know anymore

if its too much too handle
my heart breaks everyday
and its always the same'
tell me why nothing ever changes
for me

living life in this sick reality
i want to wake up
but this isn't a dream

its a nightmare
and im a prisoner
locked and cant find the key

its the one thing
thats keeping me from leaving
480 · Feb 2018
beach bum
jas Feb 2018
golden hair and blue eyes
the indefinite sun, how it shines
radiances amongst your warm tan skin  
glowing from within

soft ridges of the waves
sway back and forth
towards your board

the high you get from urging to touch
those soft pink skies
and the rush of the water building intensely
as you approach

with a  cool breeze
this moment is felt at ease
taking it all in as you take a breath
a few seconds of blissful peace

the moment your feet touch the grainy sand
reality hits back
dripping wet yet scrounging for thirst

you sit there a moment with your board
and gradually embrace today
as you look back at the sun meeting the water
you bid farewell
just until tomorrow
for that one surfer dude
434 · Jan 2018
in search of..
jas Jan 2018
in love, (well sort of)
with a work of art
a masterpiece, if you will.
if I should ever come in its presence
I'd allow myself to be torn apart

to whom it may concern ;
in search of the artist
meant to be found before its tarnish
I will not rest until I meet my target
day 18 of 365
419 · Dec 2017
a search
jas Dec 2017
in the dark
blind to the eyes
opening of a mind
i seek
i search
unsure what to find

& in the blink of an eye
my mind
goes blank...

the light
at the end of the tunnel
i can barely capture the essence
heat radiating upon my face
as i open my eyes
the thing i sought
is in view

struggling to seek reality
a key
right out from under me
alive in a senseless dream
hello, do you hear me?

found, at last
hold my breath
but could it be
that certain thing
that one wish
that i would seek
407 · Feb 2018
jas Feb 2018
my eyes burn from the urging sensation of a tear being held back
screaming to come out
and lumps in my throat I cannot seem to utter out a word
or even a breath, at that.
I've almost forgotten how to feel on account of the walls around my heart that are built up so tall.
strength holds them together but there is a slight crack in the corner,
you just might miss it.
but if you look real closely with not only your eyes but your own mind, you just might see it.
and once inside that crack the walls crumble to the bottom, so effortlessly
im vulnerable.
I do not like this feeling
its torture, really.
as I struggle to fight it , I realize that I have lost my strength
im broken
these tears in the back of my eyes have made its way onto my face
streaming warmly down to fall on my shirt
its not that I have given up on love , its that I've given in
I've allowed myself to get hurt once more
another tragedy in a page of my book
so these tears may run out soon enough
but in this moment
I will shed these tears
of hurt

I can only blame myself
398 · Jan 2018
jas Jan 2018
scenery so beautiful it draws attention to your mind
rose petals are soothing to the skin
the touch, the feel.
thorns down at the end
guarding itself
along the stem
down to the roots
where the seeds were planted deep into the soil
that's the real beauty

                                           -don't chase after those who touch the flower without knowing the soil.
day five of 365
394 · Jun 2018
jas Jun 2018
forget me
all the times we had
what i thought was love
was a joke waiting to be told
laughed by your own
tore away at my soul

hello drugs
how you've been good to me
left my body numb
I've never been more free
... cant you see

you were the drug i always needed
to let go of the world
all of these tears gone to waste
if i could choose my life
so easy to copy and paste

a different me
another path that could lead
to happiness
if only
if only it wasn't just a dream

im numb
394 · Mar 2019
jas Mar 2019
wo oh-oh-oh

hey ey yeah yeah

he said he would change
I guess he couldn't make
a difference
in this life

if its the end
than it's the beginning of
a different reality

oh, and he swears he's gonna change
swear to god by black bear instrumental
390 · Dec 2017
jas Dec 2017
why would you leave us
why would you leave me
i'm all alone now
feelings are creeping
crying on my knees
i beg to god , please
get me thru this
get me a fix
get me something to get over
one last kiss

guess you never cared
my heart you can't repair
no , not anymore
not when my chest hit the floor
left me helpless
when you walked out the door

& i don't understand how life worked out
i never gave a doubt
about us
about love
about our trust
why couldn't i realize you didn't give a ****

so now i'm stuck
i'm on my own
a new milestone
don't call me anymore
i won't pick up the phone
if you wanted to leave then stay gone

gone with the wind
gone till the end
gone from my life
something you can't mend
something you can't fix
or even comprehend
we were never more then friends

i should've known
i shoulda seen the signs
that our love died
& so i cry
while i write these lines
remembering all the good times
everything that you left behind

was me.
386 · May 2018
jas May 2018
twenty four years
pour a glass , cheers
do you like what you see in the mirror?

one time a year
celebration of all life
and all what you have in sight

a new beginning
a new promise
grab within reach
what is in your sight
or reach for w fight

another year only known of life

twenty four ounces of a glass
pour yourself a drink..

happy birthday to myself
379 · Feb 2018
jas Feb 2018
caught by a glance
hoping to have a first chance
stuck on a high
my heart is floating in the sky
above the clouds
smoke in my mind

darkness has arrived
holds breath
upon a shooting star
wishing to make you all mine
for the rest of my life

every day and every night.
373 · Feb 2018
make you mine
jas Feb 2018
the way you smile
the way you look at me with those eyes
the way they shine
oh what i'd do to make you mine
for the rest of my life

im never gunna stop trying
this feeling I can no longer hide

and I swear I never chase after just anyone
but your not just anyone , no not to me

everyday, watching from afar
waiting for the right time
to make you mine

and I don't wanna scare you away
so ill keep my distance
for just a minute

I swear one day you'll be all mine
without even putting up a fight
everything will fall into place

because im going crazy
without you
oh one day you'll be mine ,... all mine
think of this as a slow soothing song.
*amy winehouse x adele beat on youtube *
355 · Feb 2018
jas Feb 2018
your heart marks x
on this map of mine
its been a journey
took long to find

sure led me straight to you
over unbearable nights
I searched the clues

at the end of this journey
finding you is well deserving
this is feb.5
345 · Jun 2018
jas Jun 2018
poured my heart into a black hole
once i entered the unknown
as i scream for the taste of blood on my lips
to feel once more , a pinch of bliss

fell into lust, chasing love
ice in my veins
my body is numb
no longer a soul exists

fading into the distance
no longer fighting resistance
the end is near i feel it

i have a disease.. im broken.
344 · Feb 2018
jas Feb 2018
like the sun
like the blooming sunflowers in the garden
like a zest of lemon with a fresh cup of iced tea

you are yellow
a radiance of warmth energy
you are yellow
growing from the bottom up
you are yellow
leaving people with a fine taste in their mouth as they speak your name
340 · Dec 2017
part one / anxiety
jas Dec 2017

i've been meaning to do a tell all story
but the question is idk where to start
how on earth could i open up my heart
it's been chewed on and spit on
ripped apart
what is it that you wish to seek?
to find out about me
all the impleasant things
or perhaps the simplicity
the countless days i've cried myself to sleep
crying on the inside , looking out
the abundance i have of self doubt
how i cannot stand to be in large crowds
how i open my mouth
i try to speak but the words do not come out
i do not make a sound
i'm quiet as a mouse

cold sweat drips down my face
all eyes on my
this isn't my place
so i quickly hide in that dark corner of a space
or do you only want to see what you distinguish of me?
i lay on a smile so thick
you wouldn't believe
all the contemplation scrambling in my head
call me a forgery if you will
but you don't get to put me in my place
tell me to stand still
"if your feeling down take some advil
or should i get you a prescription perhaps a refill"
oh honey , please tell me another joke
the words slither down out of your mouth
do u hear yourself speak?
yet you do not choke
& that is only one part of me
you do not know
anxiety helplessness hiding
337 · Jan 2018
a persona
jas Jan 2018
what is going on?
really, please tell me.
inquiring minds need to know
as in me, im the inquiring mind.
im struggling to find my own self
you see,
I've built this persona , right?
so you may meet me and perceive me some way that fits into your mind
or the other hand
you can know me for awhile
built this persona of me, slowly yet surely
so you understand
except I seem to surprise you
I take you by whim
catch your breath kinda thing.

ah, so you don't know me?
or you thought you did.


here is your info..

two sided individual
anti social introvert
unknowingly kind
yet blunt

so which am I?
the next 5 mins.?

tell me,
what do you think of me?
do you have me figured out?
what is my persona?
336 · Jan 2018
sex crazed
jas Jan 2018
a soft kiss on the shoulder blade
cold brew up on the window sill
what a perfect duo
me and you

except , feelings creep back into my membrane
my heart sinks fast, feeling ill
goose bumps have me thinking
just for a cheap thrill
intoxicated with alcohol

call me a cab,
im drunk to walk
if im doing the right thing, why must I feel at fault?

of course, you beg me to stay
baby please, one more minute
forcefully grabbing my wrist
'stop', I say as I clench my fist

it was a good night
up until it wasn't
why is this scenario so constant

*** crazed lifestyle
tell me, is it worthwhile?

longing for romance
young love
not with you
& not when im done a fool

all must come to an end
on a last whim, here's one last kiss
and im gone
like the wind.
day 12 of 365
332 · Jan 2018
jas Jan 2018
words cut deep
when they mean something
life is fun and games
till you go and get played
lately I've been getting faded
minding  my business
hop in my lane and I switch to the next
look at this player tryna finesse
but it aint me
it aint thee
**** around and get your named tattooed
on my shoulder blade
now im insane
words cut right thru my vein
tell me lies
and don't tell me why
ima keep on trying
call me stupid
im calling cupid
for making me fall for someone
when im not lucid
no­w I've regained
my mentality
& I know now what I need
isn't you
so im thru


words­ cut deep
you don't have to tell me
what I realized is that I have a disease
slowly anticipating the right way to let go
bite your soul on youtube. /rap/
329 · Jan 2018
jas Jan 2018
cheers, to the pain
to the boy who forgot your name
to the one who makes you crazy
to the ones getting faded

hold your head up high and your drink up higher
day 26
328 · Jan 2018
a pawn..
jas Jan 2018
ok get this..
you chose me as a pawn in this game
simply to be moved around
to your expense
used and abused
that's your taste
bitter isn't it?
making me the weakest piece
is just so easy
I was fooled
blinded by a fantasy
and so here I am
uttering my last few breaths
drowning myself in the suds of alcohol
the sour taste in my mouth
and the black empty space
drilled by your immaculate actions
a pawn, no more, no less
is all i'll ever be
in your game
that you only play.
day 25
327 · Jan 2018
me & you
jas Jan 2018
me and you.

vs. everyone
vs. problems
vs. simple mishaps
vs. endless possibilities

me and you vs. the world

but the world was against us
we did not stand a chance.
ended up in total disaster.
funny, how the story changed

me vs. you

who wins?
327 · Feb 2018
jas Feb 2018
what's been on my mind
every time
that im high

with my head in the clouds
aint no way I'm coming down

my faults are what made me
the truth is what gave me
a sense of reality

im high,
doing fine
without you
by my side

and im never coming down

like a kite
fireworks on the fourth of July
this time
its all mine

as long as I'm high
day 35/ Feb. 6
327 · May 2018
jas May 2018
hot summer days
with you by my side
as we sit on the beach
and watch the high tides
cold brew in one hand
yours in the other
enjoying the orange pinkish colour
of the sky

you are my high
and i’m never coming down
i’m wrapped around your finger
going round and round

love in the air
and my vision is clear
as i look to the sky
and say a little prayer

you are my high
and i’ll never be sober
i never want this feeling to be over
as the sun kisses
forever and ever
i’m in love with the beach boys they inspire me
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