yes, i want to be with You
Angelic Beauty, You're all i see
You know i'd stay loyal and true
i'll be Yours, have all of me
Your soul, so pure and new
i can't amount, unfortunately
i can't expect You to be content with me
and i don't
i can make You smile
for a second
and that makes me happy
i can guess how you expect me to react
i just don't understand how emotions feel
i can say sorry even if i don't feel sorry
because that's what you expect from me
i felt so useless
but when i asked Her
if She was happy,
She said yes.
Why don't you love Yourself?
Stop saying that about Yourself!
It hurts when you talk so badly about Yourself...
you idiot. don't be stupid, feel good about Yourself!
i don't know who you're talking to...
You! love Yourself!
TELL me who Yourself is.
i don't know who you're referring to.
If i don't know who she is-
i didn't choose to love You
i have others i'm hurting
because i focus on You
they see something more in me
kind of the way you see Her
i don't like obsessing over You
You want my company i know
i help You see into the mind of Your enemy
but i dream about You every night
while for Her You open up your heart
and i handed it right to Her
What's it like to feel wanted?
i could have told you before
but i can't recall anymore
i'm not giving up
if i never had any hope at all
i'm worried about disappointing You
You care about me and that’s scary
You are so perfect to me
i can't stand to watch you worry your beautiful head over me
i will always be okay
i want to solve Your problems but
my love can only change so much
my support can only validate so much
my humor can only ease so much
my pride can only deliver so much
and my insecurities interfere so much..
I get it,
You don’t want to let me in
because i’ll break Your heart
but the reality of it?
You should be scared of my obsession with You.
You don't have to jump
when i jump
You have something more
to live for
i know i'm not enough
i'll unlock Your cuff
keeping You to me
it's okay because i see
the smile that She gives You
it makes you believe love is true
You said i'm not as good as Her
i know She'll hold Your heart better
the line between anger and sadness is so fine
You'll feel boiling mad but
eventually your anger turns into tears
because being angry is so draining
You began to feel defeated
my blistering heart bleeds over Your glow
from Your septic attempts to get inside
i won't say goodbye before i go
a cheerful smile for the sorrow i hide
i tried to keep You safe
for so long
i kept my demons tame
but brick by brick
You broke apart Your wall
i stepped back
in a lame attempt
to protect You
but still, i watched from a distance.
Aware my demons consumed me
long ago, as You
removed the last brick
keeping me out
my devil eyed
the gap fit as an entrance
"I like you." You said.
calling my undomesticated darkness
inside, rewarding my patience,
allowing me to finally possess
my Long Desired Angel
feelings i've created
within myself, gated.
i lost my humanity
to regain my sanity
eagerly they open
release my emotion
sixth man made door
spilling, frees more
Against my wrist i pressed the blade
"you look pretty, by the way."
i know You're perfect
i know i'm selfish
or else i'd leave
i didn't need to be fixed
when i was disassembled
i noticed a part was missing
that part was You,
no wonder why i wasn't working.
i don't need therapy, my poetry is HAPPY
i'm too stuck in my own insanity to fix myself
let me convince You
i don't have emotions
don't let me hurt You
don't miss my emotions
i will protect You
not fueled by emotions
please may i have You
.. are these my emotions?
i want to keep going
but i don't want to hide my scars
i love the way you look at me
eyes of hazel calm
like you've never seen anything more important
but i know not to get used to it
because you've always been so much more than i deserve
brush your hair Little Girl,
no one is going to brush it for you
— The End —