I hear the call
Feel the pull
I embrace the draw
And take the plunge

I fall
I was

I fall
Hate hate

It reigns


I am
Back to start
My Fractured heart
Too bitter now
To save
The self
The self
Was weak
And I want
Her out

Out out
It always goes
The hope
Is gone
Went up
The nose
Down the throat
These feeling flow
I swallowed whole
And I'll shit them out
I'll shut them out
I'll find the gold
I'll find that gold

I'll make my own

I'll even take a bow
As the curtains close
Splitting skin
The itch sinks in
Through the bones
Breathing slows
The drift begins
I disconnect
I lose my head
All gone to sky
I lose my soul
Lost all I know
Somewhere in the lows
Of high
Clouded eyes
The addictions
These pills
Are digging holes
Through stomach lining
The heart screams
Ever so softly
Even a metronome
Couldn't fix
It's off beat
I ask for help
But the devil
Just calls back
Using cc syringes
To sign his contract
My soul is
Beneath my feet
My heads up in the sky
Searching for
The lowest lows
Just to feel
The highest highs
And a high inside
I did find
Blinded by
Incandescent light
It bathed and cloaked
My entire world
Now numbed
And cold
But safe
And whole
I needed to drop
I needed to sink
Before I could
Ever reach peak
Potential is now
Past tense
Needle in hands
I signed
My own death
For one last taste
And one last breath
Of the only thing
That I have ever known
As love
Inside this flesh
The separation breathes
New awakenings
It starts through membrane
Molecules bind
Giving structure to shape
And new terms of being
The metamorphosis begins
And displaces
Self from skin
The ego drips
Flowing from pores
The body does rid
That which cages the heart
As things in mind
Release themselves
The soul unlocks
Egoless, fluid
Thoughts cascade
Down shades of self
And shadows of feeling
Spring from all things
Whoever is in the details
Whatever dark heaven flows
Through bridged hemispheres
The connection respires
New meaning
Encoding itself
Into this creature's
A human's refrain.
Collaboration by Mydriasis & Cunting-Fuck-Face
Enjoy the trip :)
I can see your face so clearly
Amongst these amber trees
I can even hear your voice
Cutting through the autumn breeze

I miss you all so much
I always wanted to be like you
You gave me so much hope
And promised my dreams would all come true

You were truly beautiful
And had such a caring soul
Anyone who came in broken
You pieced together to remake whole

I know you would have wanted
So much more for me
But I lacked the strength I lacked the drive
And now all that's left is this hostility

Mother, I am so sorry
For not putting up a fight
I was too dead inside to care
So I let them beat me every night

If you could see me now
Would you still be proud of me
And if you knew what I had done
Would I still be in our family?

I let myself become
This monster that I hate
I no longer feel anything
Not even this constant pain

There's just this empty shell
With a beating heart inside
I've lost absolutely everything
And I can't even find my pride

So mother, I am so sorry
For ruining our family name
I'm not asking for forgiveness nor pity
I should have to live with my own shame

But I just wanted you to know
That you can't blame this on yourself
You raised me right, taught me well
I found this hell all by myself

— The End —