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huwriting Jun 2014
..
I knew better than to think all the good things happening since the past few months would remain that way forever.
I was a fool to think he would let me be happy.

Even when we are not together,
Even when he is not a part of my life anymore,
Even when it's been 2 years,
He still holds my strings,
He still tries to eclipse my happiness at every chance he gets.

Why can't he leave me alone?
Why can't he let me be happy?
Why is he back?
Why now when I am finally happy?
He got his freedom,
why does he still try to tie me to the ground?

I am not strong enough for it now.
I can not go on like this.
I give up.
huwriting Jul 2014
Sometimes when I look in the mirror,
I swear I can see you standing behind me kissing my hair.
I can't believe I still blush when you do that
it's been 6 years, Al.

I am woken up by the smell of cigarettes,
the ones you smoked whenever you were nervous
about a meeting the next day.
I loathe those nasty cancerous sticks.
I throw the half-empty packet at you to make you stop.

When I brush my teeth
I can still smell your cologne in the bathroom,
Always up and ready before me.
I could just swoon looking at you in a suit.

I still see the mess you make
when you step out of the shower
with wet feet right on the carpet.
You make me so mad.

When I'm running late for work,
you help me by making your amazing 10-minute breakfast,
listening to music you wouldn't admit listening to in public.
Oh! The view I have from here is delicious,
you swaying to romantic music, singing along.
How lucky am I?
I forget all about work.

At times when I can't sleep at night,
the scent from your holey t-shirt is so comforting,
I don't really need a dreamcatcher.
I could spend forever in your strong, warm arms,
on this bed, kissing you with the moon and sun as our witnesses
and our heartbeats as the soundtracks to our lives.

Now, I'm here, clinging your favorite bottle of Jack.
Sitting by your grave talking to a stone, for hours.
Your half-empty cigarette packet is by my side.
I wish I could throw it at you.

It's been 12 days
and
I don't know how you do it or what you do
But whatever it is you're doing
to make all this happen
Please don't stop.
I'll keep it a secret for you,
Tuck me into bed
and curl up beside me,
Just like you did
last night.

- H.U.
06.07.2014
huwriting Jun 2014
Another Saturday night, another charade.
I was beginning to get sick of it.  
Crowds make me nervous, talking to strangers makes me nervous.
But I had to go and how glad am I that I did.
I wouldn't have met him if I stayed home.
Mr. Thornton wouldn't have brought him to me.
Oh, but he brought himself.

I was sitting there by myself while my friends were killing it on the dance floor.
I noticed him standing in the corner, he was looking at me,
skinny jeans, faded black Ramones t-shirt, messy black hair and **** pale skin.
The next time I looked his way he was walking towards me,
so confidently, all the while smiling this crooked smile.
I was calculating the time it would take me to just leap off and rush out the back door.
I had to run.
That was my first instinct in such situations.
But I couldn't.
I looked up and there he was,
sitting opposite me, grinning so wide, like he knew the effect he had on me.
I was dumbfounded.
I'm sure he could hear my heartbeat.
I looked at him and his eyes were the most beautiful shade of green I had ever seen.

"Hey", he mouthed.
And with that,
I was in love.
I realized I would be spilling a lot of ink,
just trying to capture every moment with him.

- H.U.
I know this is just me rambling but I had to share it. I had to write it down just to make sure I remember it all because I am hoping there would be more such moments with him :)
huwriting Jun 2014
It's 3am.
I'm sitting on the kitchen counter, looking out the window,
I look up at the beautiful moon,
the dark sky and scattered twinkling stars.
I look down at the bar across the street,
a group of girls waiting for a cab,
a couple in the corner stealing kisses,
a drunk sitting on the sidewalk laughing.
I can't help but smile.

"You're beautiful", he says "I just saw a dream where I lost you. Please come back to bed."
"Oh, but baby, you've only just found me. And I know you always will."

I sit here at this odd time not because I have anything to be sad about but because I finally have it all.
I watch him sleeping next to me, that crooked smile still on his face, his tousled hair falling on his forehead, his chest rising and falling
and that rhythm becomes the soundtrack to my nights.

I can't sleep,
I can't afford to sleep,
Not when I should spend every moment thanking the Universe for giving me my dream, for giving me him.

He wraps his arms around me and pulls me back to bed. We're back in our little bubble, our piece of heaven.

    - H.U.
I know it's all a little jumbled. Not very well executed but I can't seem to put it in any other way.
huwriting Jun 2014
The best advice I ever got was, write
Just write it down.
When you're happy or sad or don't know what you're feeling
When you're angry or calm,
Write it down.
It doesn't have to be big words,
It doesn't even have to rhyme,
It just has to be true.
Let it be a part of the written world and maybe it won't change what's happening currently
but it will surely be worth it
someday.

  - H.U.
27.06.2014
It doesn't have to make sense to anyone but you. Yep. Best advice.
huwriting Oct 2014
It torments me.
Breaks my tattered heart in unrecognizable pieces
Tears my soul and sets each forgotten piece aflame.
This demon of a life;
this black shadow that won’t stop
running after me till I am nothing but dust,
till I am forced to end this ****** charade
with my defenseless hands.

I cannot live like this anymore
I cannot let it consume me and
I would readily trade my erratic self
with anyone who can give me a stable day
without these kaleidoscopic events.

- H.U.
30.09.2014
I've been reading a lot of Sylvia Plath's work lately and all I can say is I find a deep connection with her.
huwriting Jun 2014
like the fox
I run with the hunted and
if I’m not the happiest
man on earth I’m surely the
luckiest man
alive.
This man. Anything I say about him would not be enough.  I love these lines. Will soon get some of it inked on me.
huwriting Aug 2014
Peace arrives,
when we accept this strange life -
the wasted gamble of our days,
the pleasure of leaving it all behind.
Cry,
grieve,
read,
forget,
drink
and begin again.
- H.U.
08.08.2014
This was my first attempt at Blackout poetry and who else could I pick? Bukowski!!
(From - mind and heart in the book "The pleasures of the ******" by Charles Bukowski)
huwriting Jun 2014
I thought I would find my answers
at the bottom of the bottle
but what I found was
the memory of your beautiful face,
your green eyes,
the touch of your calloused fingers and bruised lips
and at least in that drunken stupor
you were mine again.
So I drank.

- H.U.
26.06.2014
huwriting Jul 2014
Eyes. Those **** eyes.
Just one look
and they made me believe;
in fairies and unicorns
And magic and
love

- H.U.
18.07.2014
This is inspired by Alex and his beautiful green eyes :)
huwriting Aug 2014
Where your darkness meets mine and
there is no crack in the walls to let in any light,
Where the night is everpresent
and the sun fails to rise,
Where the flowers are scared to bloom
and the birds have no flight,
Where the seasons never change
and it is winter all the time.
Where the colors are not familiar
and all is black and white.
Come find me
I’ll  be waiting with this battered heart in my hand and
a tattered soul longing for your repair.
Come find me,
give it a try..

- H.U.
25.08.2014
huwriting Jul 2014
Sometimes,
you just have to wait
to have enough faith
in your wings.

- H.U.
02.07.2014
You feel like you're stuck in a rut and you have to run away but just can't find the path, well, just wait, restore your faith in yourself and all will work out.
huwriting Aug 2014
I fell for him;
Over the edge of sanity into oblivion,
into something I cannot verbalize.
And he fell right with me
as if he could feel the intensity of
infinity beckoning us with open arms.
We were free falling
and love was what gave us flight.

- H.U.
15.08.2014
huwriting Jun 2014
The taste
of rain
- Why kneel?

- Jack Kerouac
huwriting Jun 2014
And every piece of
broken glass
had my name on it.

- H.U.
Old memories. Ancient :)
Him
huwriting Jun 2014
Him
“Hello”, he said and I lost myself.
           In him, in his words,
            in his eyes, in his world.
            
                        - H.U.
I was lost. I couldn't stop what was happening, I didn't want it to stop. I was freefalling.
Him
huwriting Jul 2014
Him
He wrote poetry,
with the pads of his fingers on my skin
leaving a trail of goose bumps.
He wrote poetry,
on the valleys of my heart
his words rhyming with every beat.
He wrote poetry
on my soul
words warming me and my entire being.

People thought he was crazy
but that is what made him so special,
he never needed paper to write poetry
he used the entire Universe as his canvas
writing words in the stars, stringing them together
and presenting them to me with a childlike gleam in his eyes
and in that moment,
I could forsake it all
to be a fragment of his canvas.

- H.U.
09.07.2014
For Al, you inspire me bb
huwriting Jun 2014
Ever get that feeling that you just belong?
That no matter where life takes you,  it is going to work out with at least THAT one person or in that one place?
That you are finally home?

'HOME?'
This word has always got me thinking.
Can it be a person? Or does it have to be a place? Or Somewhere you have never been?

Home is associated with that warm, fuzzy, safe feeling.
But can it be flesh and bones and blood?
Can it be him?

I am waiting for that feeling.  
Waiting for the answers.
Waiting to be home...
The concept of HOME has never failed to intrigue me..
huwriting Jul 2014
We're all running,
From
or
to something.

- H.U.
03.07.2014
huwriting Jan 2015
Love me slow and not with haste,
fill my heart with all your grace.
This fickle skin will wither away
with the changing seasons burning astray.

Wrapped up in the cloaks of darkness like a banshee
in the grey, hooded cloth;
I’m wishing on the ashes to remind me of the fire
that started the very flame in my bleeding veins.

Let the wail of the woman replace the moan of the wolf;
when love and hope fly away from my soul -
set me free with the callous winds,
live unbruised and promise me that you will sigh no more.

Then leave me on the ground to rot in this haze,
I will pass just like those yesterdays.
Worry not about the chill in my bones,
I would rather die in the frosty tomb than live
in this loaned body of scattered remains
rearranged by the crescent full moon.

Now, love me slow and not with haste
and fill my heart with all your grace.

           - H.U.
05.01.2015
ldr
huwriting Jul 2014
ldr
He is my light
when I'm lost
And
My darkness
when he is gone

                   - H.U.
I miss you, Al
15.07.2014
huwriting Sep 2014
He asked me if I still write about him
what I couldn't tell him was,
I still write to him.
The letters just never get posted;
they're boxed up with my feelings
covered in frost
from his wintry soul

- H.U.
06.09.2014
huwriting Jul 2014
Hi,
I joined Hello Poetry on 18th June 2014,
it's going to be a month since I did.
I've been writing almost all my life (I'm just 21, so it's not much)
just as a form of a constructive outlet.
I would go insane if I don't, no matter how ***** what I write is.

I started sharing what I used to write with some of my friends who were going through things I went through to show them they're not alone.
They encouraged me to share it with a wider audience which I never had the courage to.
I am a big believer of the Law of Attraction (yes, The Secret et al) and one night I was listening to some meditation audio and I woke up the next morning, googled sites to share what I write and HP came up.
I thought, why not? So i signed up, started posting stuff.
Joe Cole messaged me to tell me he liked my work and he would post it in a group and well, there I was thinking it was really worth it.
I got the motivation I needed.

Thank you Joe and all of you here who read, comment, like, share, follow, message; ALL of you are making a difference and
I thank you from the bottom of my stitched-up heart.
I don't really know much about poetry
or the various forms (I am a law student)
but I am learning them on my own and will continue to.

Lately, seeing so much hate on this site just shatters me a little more.
Please don't let what others do bother you (read Cravo)
Let them be.
We're here because we love words, we find solace in them and
something or the other that has wounded or made our hearts happy
motivated us to post our work here.
Let's not forget it.
Keep writing and doing what you do best
because each one of you has taught me something or the other
and I'm sure to many others.
You are all doing a great job, giving each other hope.
Let's build each other up with love and words.
Continue to shine your light beautiful humans.

Love, Regards & Respect,
H.U.
I am too young and I don't really have any right to do this or give anyone advice but please listen to me.
This site gave me a lot and I can't see people hurting.
Please. Thank you and I apologize if any of what I said hurt you.
huwriting Jun 2014
On a cobweb afternoon
In a room full of emptiness
By a freeway I confess
I was lost in the pages

Of a book full of death
Reading how we'll die alone
And if we're good we'll lay to rest
Anywhere we want to go

In your house I long to be
Room by room patiently
I'll wait for you there like a stone
I'll wait for you there alone

And on my deathbed I will pray
To the Gods and the Angels
Like a pagan to anyone
Who will take me to Heaven

To a place I recall
I was there so long ago
The sky was bruised
The wine was bled
And there you lead me on

In your house I long to be
Room by room patiently
I'll wait for you there like a stone
I'll wait for you there alone, alone

Alone I read
Until the day was gone
And I sat in regret
Of all the things I've done

For all that I've blessed
And all that I've wronged
In dreams until my death
I will wonder on

In your house I long to be
Room by room patiently
I'll wait for you there like a stone
I'll wait for you there alone, alone

by Audioslave
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7QU1nvuxaMA
Anyone who has not listened to this song, please give it a listen once. This has been the soundtrack for me for all my dark days
The words are exceptional, the singers voice soulful. The link is above.
huwriting Aug 2014
I wish I could undo the pain,
turn all your nights into days
say the things you want me to say
be yours, remind you my name.
I know I gotta make it right, baby,
show you we will survive
you and I together,
fighting this fight of lust and lies.

But tonight I'll pave the way to your
heart, drowning in liquid heaven
we'll go back to the start.
Tonight, let's fall in love
fall apart and do it all over again.

- H.U.
24.08.2014
huwriting Jun 2014
I lay in bed, Arctic Monkeys blasting from his laptop.
He's on the floor snorting his stupid drugs.
I beg him to come back to bed, I long for his touch.
But he shuns me like always.
tells me i am stupid and a phony and that he is stuck with me.
I don't get angry though, he is like that most times, mad and irritated,
but i know he loves me
or does he?
Anyway, I have accepted that this our life now,
inside this ****** apartment.
My friends say I am kidding myself, that I need to clean up my act and dump his ***,
    so I dumped them instead.
He has cast this spell on me.
I can't get out.
Will I ever get out of this mess?
I am finally suffocating.. losing touch with reality..
                           lost....

     - H.U.
I wrote this some years back. It's still so fresh in my head. All of it.
huwriting Aug 2014
Tonight I'll let my love flow like an ocean
meeting your sky, halfway
on the horizon
as we bask in the illumination
of the full moon,
where you spin your words together
in the stars,
giving birth to a sweet lullaby
that makes falling asleep feel
like being closer to heaven.

- H.U.
24.08.2014
Wrote this for a collaboration with someone
huwriting Aug 2014
He is my place
of sanctity
in this otherwise
impious world.

-H.U.
15.08.2014
huwriting Jul 2014
He said I could be his
muse
and
that's all
I've ever been.

- H.U.
17.07.2014
He was always mine, in his words, on paper while she was the one who got to keep him. It was for the best, I guess.
huwriting Aug 2014
Your heartbeat mixed
with mine,
created the perfect soundtrack
to our life.

- H.U.
22.07.2014
huwriting Jul 2014
At times, when I can't sleep at night
the scent from your holey t-shirt is so comforting,
I don't really need a dreamcatcher.

I could spend forever in your strong, warm arms,
on this bed, kissing you
with the moon and sun as our witnesses
and our heartbeats as the soundtracks to our lives.

- H.U.
06.07.2014
This is a part of "12 Days" my earlier post but this particular part is my favorite and means a lot to me.
http://hellopoetry.com/poem/771220/12-days/
huwriting Jun 2014
I was at dinner with my entire family,
Everyone laughing, talking, doing what they do, nagging each other, gossiping.
But I just couldn't feel the love.
The love that I thought would be there when everyone is together.
There were people hiding behind masks,
pretending to love each other,
I can't belong here,
I never belonged here.
There are people here who taunt me, question my life choices,
try to make decisions for me,
call me names behind my back and laugh at me.
All I do is smile and
shatter a little more inside,
I have to look the other way to hide my tears.

All I have to ask them is, is this what you call love?
How do you sleep at night?
You make me lose all faith in humanity.
That is why I am kind to everyone I meet,
And I don't need any more hate in my life,
I get all of it here.
Can't wait to get away from here
Can't wait to be Home.

-H.U.
No humanity here.
Ok so you have all already seen, I'm not a poet, I can't write poetry but I just write.
huwriting Jun 2014
She was ready to trade it all.
Her happiness,
her dreams,
her heart.
Just for his smile and love .
She wanted to take away all his sadness.

And all she got in the trade, was
His smile, but for someone else
His love, but for some other girl
His happiness, but with someone who was not her.

Now, she has all his pain, sadness and depression
But
Not him.

  - H.U.
30.06.2014
Some more ramblings
huwriting Jul 2014
I stood there, rooted to the spot,
looking up all I could see was
the blurred silhouette of his form.
Memories of the last time I was here
came flashing like a bolt
of lightning.
I took my first step
and I swear to all that is holy
his eyes glistened,
surrounded by tea lights
in the very same chapel.
I was dumbfounded.
Standing there and not
running away sapped
all my energy.
But,

This time, I won't run
This time, it's different
This time, it's him.


- H.U.
21.07.2014
huwriting Jun 2014
Come to me,

wearing only

your scars.

- H.U.
I want nothing more, don't be shy, don't hide them. I just want you with all of you. I would heal them for you, no outer beauty for me.
I hope all of us get someone who would love us for us, with all of what we have.
30.06.2014
huwriting Jun 2014
..And I knew,
he would soon become
my favourite addiction.

- H.U.
Happened last night.. we just 'clicked'
Now I sit here with a belly full of butterflies and a stupid grin I can't wipe off :D
huwriting Jun 2014
After all these years, I thought everything would change
That time, as everyone keeps saying, would heal all wounds
But nothing has changed,
The pain hasn't faded,
I still feel the same.
In my soul and in my bones, it's still there.

Knowing that it'll always be a part of me is comforting,
but it's enough to ruffle up the present.

- H.U.
It's supposed to be the past but it still creeps up at all times to ruin the present
huwriting Jul 2014
We're all the same
made of flesh and bone
and a heart that is wounded in
some way or the other.
In the end,
we'll bleed the same
turn to ash and dust.
Should we let religion or region or color
defy the deaths
we are all going to die?

Instead, let's help each other rise back up,
put our pieces back together
stitch them up with love.
Break the walls we build
to keep people out.
Make a new world that's ours to live
before our time runs out.

- H.U.
15.07.2014
huwriting Aug 2014
And his smile; his smile was
the prayer I memorized every
verse of.
It was as if it was put there by
the Angels, making a non-believer
like me believe in the existence of
God.

- H.U.
19.08.2014
huwriting Sep 2014
Those “pretty” girls in floral skirts
Drink their wine and look at her with judgy eyes.
While she struts around town, smacking her lips & rolling joints,

They would never understand her;
Those “pretty” girls in floral skirts with their lackluster souls.
Their charms would never suffice.
"***** their elegance", she would say
and order a green fairy all the while swearing with the boys.
There was nothing pretty about her,
She was madness.
With her wild hair, stormy eyes, that faraway look and clever mind
She broke millions of hearts to get what she wanted
burst their bubbles with her heels alone
She gave up on love; she gave up on him to survive.

- H.U.
15.09.2014

I've missed posting here and reading all your works :(
red
huwriting Jul 2014
red
He had stains of
the most beautiful shade of
pink lipstick on his neck.
Funny,
since I just wore
red.

- H.U.
27.07.2014
Only regret? Not asking him the shade code lol
huwriting Aug 2014
Remind me of us,
Remind me of love,
Remind me of me

- H.U.
20.06.2014
Fragment of an earlier post
huwriting Jul 2014
They say it is a big bad world out there
you may just rot in pieces,
not knowing how decomposed I already was.
Every scrap of me, rusted, in the
aloof corners that I call broken dreams,
before I woke up owing to your presence of high beams.
Honey, our collision was one of its own
kind of voodoo.
                                                   - Prakhar

**Every rusted scrap of you,
every broken dream,
I tried to dress with the antiseptics of my love.
Baby, you said our collision was outworldly;
it was all kinds of magic.
But what you failed to see in
the high beams was,
I was scared,
not of the big bad world,
but the demons in you.
                                                    - H.U.
19.07.2014
The first part is by my writer friend 'Prakhar' who is sadly not on this site and the other part is mine. I'm addicted to response poems now.
huwriting Jun 2014
I ran away,
with a little money,
a typewriter and
the memory of his pure soul.
Just to try and see if I could recreate something
as splendid as him.
He was made of the stars, the moon,
the sun, the earth.
He was the answer to the questions
I didn't even know I asked.

- H.U.
huwriting Jun 2014
He was the only one brave enough
to love this broken girl
with a stitched up heart.

And now,
it was her turn
to save him.

- H.U.
Saving him was all she longed to do
30.06.2014
huwriting Jun 2014
I saw him after 2 years tonight.
He is still the same boy; a little shy, a little broken.
She has her hand on his chest and he is looking at her like he used to look at me.
I can see the pain in those sad eyes, that pain never seems to leave him.
Can she see it too?

And does she know where the scars on his chest right next to his heart come from?
Does she know they match mine?

- H.U.
We were both broken. I used to cut and he had scars of his own. We both used pain to cut the pain, it felt better to feel physical pain than the one we felt deep in our hearts, even if for some time and now we are apart and everything has changed again.
huwriting Jun 2014
He was my storm,
when he left, I was shattered,
broken to pieces,
pieces he still played with.
And then one day I resolved to leave that storm behind
and started building my castle back up,
from the scraps of me he couldn't taint.

and just like Murakami said,  "When you come out of the storm, you won’t be the same person who walked in."

I realized then that I was changed,
with my shiny new castle and no trace of his footsteps,
either coming in or going out.

- H.U.
I gave him my all and he left me with nothing but broken pieces,
but I am grateful for it. It was for the better. I think.
huwriting Jul 2014
She's at the ticket counter
buying a one way ticket to run to him forever.

He's at Tiffany's
selecting a ring for someone who isn't her.

- H.U.
07.07.2014
huwriting Aug 2014
And through these years,
this skin has felt it all - kisses, bites,
licks and whips.
None of them set my soul on fire
like the sound of your breath
on my neck or your fingers
tracing circles,
bringing me to the edge.

- H.U.
06.08.2014
This was for a contest where we were supposed to write words on our skin, this was one of my entries.
huwriting Jul 2014
You stop living,
the moment you let
society dictate
your every move.
04.07.2014

Don't give them the power, don't let socially constructed ideas be what defines you. Also, you are part of the society as well, don't judge. Don't do this to other humans. Stop being bullies!
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