I open my eyes, and just see nothing
did i think it would help if i took off my glasses, would it hurt less?
just to not be able to see clearly?
apparently,that isn't so.
the fact that i could not see anything certainly didn't distract me from reality....

it had no affect on my vacant pleasures
if anything, it just made it worse
because the fact that i couldn't see what was happening to me
did declare that it wasn't
i had no escape

how foolish was i to think that it would go away that simple
to think that if i had no visual proof of anything that everything from that point on would be absolutely painless
that my suffering would surely end?

Was i really that desperate to even try it?
i guess is was
but it did have the tiniest slither of comfort for everything to be just.......
a blur

The question is:
would i rather be in total agony than feel numb towards everything?
if was in my right mind, i'd instantly say yes
but these days, there are various times i think twice.

He could never love me, I will never have his heart
no matter how much i'll try and try, we'll always be apart

He could never touch me, the way i'd only ever dreamed
with his warmth against my skin
i've felt it once or twice before
and been hoping for evermore

He could never see me, the way i've always seen him
for he has long decided that i'm not enough for him

He could never love me,but i will never quit,
for i will try until he's mine, even if i already know
that i will fail, but i want it back, to where we were at

For i would carry all my fears,a thousand miles, a million ways,
a thousand more, for a million days
to hear his voice his, to see his precious face
i'd come all this way

Just to THINK he is mine,for once in my mind
I'd still go, even though i already know
he could NEVER love me.