I don't understand
why I like you
You're nothing to me,
nothing.
Not a friend,
Foe,
Acquaintance.
You're just there
always in my thoughts;
Lingering.
You're nothing but a
Distraction.

In truth I think,
I like having you in my head
That way someone else
Can understand just how crazy it is
To have these thoughts that suffocate me.
The thought of
scars,
razors,
blood.
The lovely pain it's all caused me.

I'd like to think
Someone is right there with me.
Holding my hand.
Someone who *understands.

I wonder what would happen to the world

If this stupid girl

Didn't live anymore.

Would there be peace or war ?

What if she died young-

And never spoke the words caught on her tongue

What if this girl couldn't bear it?

Would people think it was just a girl throwing a dumb fit?

Would they care that she was gone?

Or would it just be a quick "So long"

Only to be forgotten - "Holly who?"

Or would they think she was just a fool

But what if she couldn't take it anymore?

What if she thought there was nothing left to live for?

Who would save me?

Burning me up inside;

Feels like I'm being eaten alive

The razor crying out for me

"I'll make you feel happy"

My blood would drain

As I slowly go insane

Oh how I crave;

That soon-to-come day

When I finally give in

To the razor so sharp , yet so paper thin

Being happy? It's easy to pretend

when you're so close to the end

One cut, two cuts, three

Just one more please?