Dear Bliss,
Some day I feel as I I may be able to write an ecstatic poem
Of abstract hues
Of shimmering light
Avoiding the blues
Avoiding the fright

Dear faith,
Some day I feel as if I may be able to write a hopeful poem
Of curious faith
Of embracing hope
Avoiding struggling fate
Avoiding chiseled rope

Dear Me, Myself, and I
Some day I feel as if I may be able to tip toe
Across the ash
Without burning my calloused feat.
Some day

The sweet taste of the warm tsunami brought a smile to my lips
It left a bubbly moustache, surrounding the mishap peach fuzz above my lip
Suliva also clung
And I held onto it so

Don't let go of me
Lie with me in the snow
You can sing a soft tune
That's all I needed to know

When your soft lips pressed against me
A lingering feeling crept up on me
HOPE
I will take it and run with it

I'll regret zipping up the back of her skinny, white dress
I'll regret watching her walk down the aisle, one again
I'll regret watching her latest lover Hanz
Taint her lips with a ******, rich kiss
I'll remember her chanting words he said
"I'm a disappointment ..."
I'll remember her laying in bed all day
"Want a smoke?" She'd crazily choke out

I know I shouldn't live
In the future or past
But there's nothing left to turn to
No happiness will ever last
I will try hard to be normal
Careless, not meaningful
But my thoughts jumble up
And I'm labeled an ***

A ****** rich kid spat on me today
"You look like the kind of boy who shops at Glitters."
Oh really? That makes me feel great
"The last time I was in Glitters my mother had a seizure."
He also decided to call me a nerd
Reminding me of the boy last week who called me, "That gay one."
Everything, all of it, is my "mothers" fault

I don't want to be something I am not
But what I'm not is what I need to be
If only my mother would give it some thought
To **** herself already, I hope you rot

She had the habit
To shove her fingers
Down her raw throat
Re-flexing her repetitive gag
Her imperfect eyes, beginning to sag
I asked her what if...
We had a second chance
Belt up your baggy pants

I can feel two sides of me
Ripping my unsteady being apart
Your craziness drove me insane as well
You are still this way
A child with no words could tell
I can't help but repent on the past
In the back of my mind I listen to you yell
No blink of happiness will ever last

I watched a boy hug his mother
Their smiles outshine the tips of damp grass
How I would die to be him
To feel something within
That faint spark of joy
To wrap your arms around the one you love
I wished we had that for each other, mother
Will we have it above?

"Shut the **** up
Or rot in Hell"
I shrieked at my mother
As she scolded me
Her oblivious, furious stare
Making my broken heart unaware
I triggered it
She's going insane

She wouldn't let go of my arm
"Tell him to come back here"
She choked at my father
I saw the Devil in her eyes
Pure craziness
Disgust and despise
Why won't she get out of my life
I have nothing left inside

It took my life not to scream
"You're the reason my life was Hell then
and the reason it's Hell now"
What else do you call
Waking up in your life
To feed your torn down mother
Seeing divorce papers in sight
Only then she decided to hold down supper

You tried to yank me from my fathers arms
An unknown protection
A belt with great harm
I am starting to think
Calling you mother is wrong
You don't own the title
And you don't own me now
Please swallow one more thing for me

...A bottle full of pills
Leave my sorrow soul be

His wails put a knife to my chest
He can't comprehend the world
Where his mother went
Why his father is never to be seen
Why his family is struggling
Why strangers are so mean
Why school is frustrating
Why danger is obscene

His smile jammed the knife deep down
His mother is trying to get back up
But the only thing coming back up
Is her delayed dinner
He can't express himself
Without making a scene
He just wants to be normal
His normality is aware to me

His struggle pulled the knife out
I tell him that I love him
I laugh at his jokes
I pull his legs into bed at night
I check on his medication
I-I-I
How self centered I am
I need to try harder, stop his confused cries

His future helped me close my eyes
Say good night to the helpless
This strange little boy
That I describe in this rhyme
He is my brother
Can't even tell the time
But he can stand tall
When the world decides to fall