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May 2019 · 137
Three little words
Helena May 2019
those three little words
i said them first
you were so nervous
that it almost hurt
you kissed my lips
and caressed my thighs
for a second I thought saw our future
in your light brown eyes
you started slow
and then picked up the pace
i felt a smile creep on to my face
i loved you then
and I love you now
baby I can’t wait
to see you tomorrow
Helena Apr 2019
It’s 4am and I’m grasping
for your fingertips and hoping
to reach your blonde ringlets
and I wake up in a cold sweat
because last night I had to text
you that I love you instead of you
whispering it in my ear and giving
me goosebumps because those
are the last words that you say to
me every single night and I know
that I’ll have you again tomorrow
but right now that just seems too
far away
Mar 2019 · 256
I dreamt of you
Helena Mar 2019
I dreamt of you and tried
to will myself back to sleep
just to see how it end up

I would have glued my eyes shut
I would have glued my eyes shut just for one more look at you and me together

I fell in love with you
I fell in love with you when
you were just my friend and
all I’ve ever wanted was for
you to love me too
Dec 2018 · 226
Untitled
Helena Dec 2018
the thing about wishes is that
if you tell anyone they won’t come
true but I have waited a few months
and I need to tell you that I wished
for you in every eye lash and fountain
and rainbow and shooting star and
the thing is that they are coming true
Dec 2018 · 692
CB
Helena Dec 2018
CB
do you remember the day
that you realized that you’re
hopelessly in love with your
best friend?
Oct 2018 · 123
Untitled
Helena Oct 2018
did you know that even just
holding your hand makes me
feel like I’m holding the world?

or that I skinned my knees when
I fell so hard and so fast for you?

but you dusted them off and helped
them heal and oh my god I am so
In love with you
Oct 2018 · 168
My heart is the moon cycle
Helena Oct 2018
I can never really tell
If the tide is high or
low or if it’s going out
or coming back in and
I don’t really know much
about the phases of the
moon and if it’s waxing or
waning but I know that
when you hold me the gaping
void that usually corrupts my
soul is finally gone and for
once I am actually whole
Oct 2018 · 370
our third first kiss
Helena Oct 2018
we were sitting on the couch
at 2 am and you said to me
that we have had not one, not
two, but three first kisses and
you said that the first was in
November of last year and all
I could think about was how
I wasn't supposed to want you
to kiss me but I did and how
when you kissed me I almost
died a little but I know you did
not feel the same way and then

our second kiss was this past May
and you said that I was shaking so
much that you had to hold me up
and I can remember how hard I
was smiling the next day and

our third was in my bed with tears
running down your cheeks and that
was the first time you realized that
you loved me
Oct 2018 · 159
to my not boyfriend
Helena Oct 2018
I love you because
your blonde curls
are so unruly and
your laugh is so
uninhibited and
you never hold
anything back and
you love me so fully
and your heart is
pure and you are
just so good
Sep 2018 · 3.1k
my golden
Helena Sep 2018
it's not easy being just friends
when this summer you kissed
me with the passion of the sun
that scorched our backs by the
beach and it's so hard when
you catch my gaze and I can
literally feel the magnetism
between us even when we don't
touch but oh when we do my body
is helpless just like your board
in the ocean sloshing around
in the crashing surf but our
relationship was a bit like a
wave because it came and went
and left nothing behind but it
never really crashed against
the shore it was more just like
the moon slowly pulling the tide
in as the sun goes down in the late
afternoon and I can remember you
asking me if it was waxing or waning
and which constellations I could see
and I never knew the answer but now
I know that I really really do miss you
Helena Sep 2018
ask me again-
how I could
have fallen for
a broken soul
so damaging
and abusive and
mean but the truth
is that I was a little
girl not even 15
when u touched
my body and I
thought that
you had touched
my heart I would
have never fallen
in love with you
now but for my
little 15 year old
mind your passion
and beauty were
enough and that's
why I went run-
ning back to you
Helena Jul 2018
we were only seventeen
when your eyes first met mine
so bright and so green
and mine so so wide

you drove with your windows down,
just a little too reckless
and you always laughed
when I screamed
that you went too fast

you were long blonde hair
laughing out of the car window
and into the night sky
like stars pouring into the heavens up high

you were long conversations
that stretched far into the morning
and when I asked you what you wanted
you told me to stop worrying-
that you liked me-
so wasn't knowing that enough?

you told me that I was crazy
but that's what you loved about me
you stroked my face
but you didn't mean to touch my heart

just like you didn't mean to leave,
it wasn't ever your choice

sometimes I wish that I could wonder
just how you're doing
but you're not here
you can't come back

— The End —