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434 · Apr 2018
The Hullabaloo
Hadiy Syakir Apr 2018
In the midst
of the hullabaloo,

I found a heaven
that resides deep
in the heart of the hell.

I ran towards it,
only to realize
that I was dead for all this time.
428 · Feb 2017
Dam once was
Hadiy Syakir Feb 2017
It was once high up to the brim,
the storm, the wave, the breeze,
as we are carried to the middle
of the uncharted yet wild sea
and the sun about to rise
the dusk about to disappear
we let the rosy amethyst
came and became the catalyst
the catalyst of the uprising
and we are no longer undermined,
now the dam is no longer a dam too.
420 · Jan 2017
Joy in Pain
Hadiy Syakir Jan 2017
It is not impossible
to find joy in pain
when things are
getting sensible
for all of us
to feed a ploy
that will always
play and return
to the initial point
over and over
again.

Tell me
who does not
ever feel
joy in pain?
a veterinary
a mail carrier
a sous chef
a sommelier
a taco vendor
a groundsman
a pilates trainer
a football quarterback
a fast food chain worker
a ship captain in Somalia
they all have tasted
the wine of delight
while they have been
wounded severely
every single day
when they woke up
in the morning
from Monday to Sunday.

As for me
I’d rather
blow away my mind
by blowing
few rolls full of life
before I take
the paper
and detach
the pen cap
from its body
to start writing again.
Hadiy Syakir Jun 2017
Into the night
we stand still
and hold on tight
whatever we feel
unless it is right
we foot the bill
to reverse the tide
overflow overflow
change the world
so that we can grow.

It doesn't feel right
when the neon is too bright
and instinct is out of sight
give me a rollercoaster ride
before you hold me tight
push me with all your might
but when it doesn't feel right,
it doesn't feel right.
406 · Jul 2018
Prayer
Hadiy Syakir Jul 2018
Prayer
is when
you lump
all your fears
and desires
indefinite words,
waiting for
all the fractions
in the metasphere
to take over.
402 · May 23
A Trip With You
Hadiy Syakir May 23
when you asked me
for the only direction
to the campsite of holy Aurora
I fed you with the temptation
and when you laid the blanket
I made you the bed instead.

I was already underneath the lake,
and I extended my hand to you,
waiting for you to realise
that there is nothing at stake,
and there is no wrong in being true.

when you talked to me
about the fiery, empty sunset
there were devils who linger and smile
I painted clouds and rainbows
for you to be sheltered from
partook in a deep sigh and grows.

you are awakened
by the smell of the brewed coffee
filled with our joy and contentment
you are no longer in a daze
forever buried in the strong aftertaste.

stay within my sight,
and touch me with all your might.
398 · Jan 2018
Yes, We Are
Hadiy Syakir Jan 2018
We are tied in this together
harder, closer and tighter
I had this kind of bad fever
that I can see this last forever.

We are so compatible
like long lost friends
you are my decible
in the tightest wavelengths.

We are close to each other
like long lost siblings
you are my unending river
in one of the world's greatest findings.

We are so wide awake
like a record put on shuffle sings
you are my deadly snake
in the need of poisonous stings.

We are almost inseparable
like a fit thunder and storm
you are those birds that dabble
in the strike at sea out of norm.

We are hardly intangible
like hydrogen oxide in the air
you are the only trouble
in the search for lone hydrogen in pair.

We are so great in tandem
like Leonard Cohen's words of rhythm
you are the heart of my poem
in the greatest invention since algorithm.

You are surely the best ever
as,
I have lost count of my own blinks
you assured me that everything will be better
as,
I will never know what the future bring.
381 · Jun 2018
Mahuku
Hadiy Syakir Jun 2018
Apa yang ku mahu

Hanya ku yang tahu



Biar ada datang membelenggu

Akan datang angin menyatu



Lari,lari pergi saja diriku

Jauh ke puncak aku tetap berlalu



Aku jiwa lama termangu

Bosan, letih jadi diriku



Kerna ada saja yang rasa tahu

Lebih dari rohku.


16 April 2012
363 · Jun 2018
Antara Hidup/Mati
Hadiy Syakir Jun 2018
Kehidupan
tak menjanjikan
harapan;

Kematian
tak menjanjikan
penyelesaian.
346 · Feb 2017
Equal to none
Hadiy Syakir Feb 2017
Every time
I look at you
I know it is
the worst ever
feeling to have
in this world.
It is worse than
having a tyre
punctured on
the road
in the middle of nowhere
and being kicked
out from the boat
in the middle of nowhere
you are stuck
in a glass box
you did not
built it
and someone else
who thinks
they are superior
built it for you.
I wish I could
hug you
kiss you
and bring
you somewhere
without further
ado.
All you can wish
is just to be free
not just another
commodity.
It is better to be dead
on a natural cause
outside
than being stuck
in somewhere and
feeling lost
inside.

Feline oh my feline.
Nothing wins, nothing ever wins.
346 · Mar 2018
paracosm/microcosm
Hadiy Syakir Mar 2018
While you sat at that corner
singing all your praises
over the cosmic and summer

I was at the other corner
listening to the words of your
worry and wonder.

I must have loved you
like how I adore my paracosm,
like how I need a microcosm.
337 · Jul 2017
smile
Hadiy Syakir Jul 2017
Why would I turn back
and smile,

if you left me out in the cold,
lost in the wild.
337 · Sep 2017
living a stage show
Hadiy Syakir Sep 2017
I am tired
of putting on the shirt
because it reminds me
of the unwanted chain
before the imminent dawn
plucked bouquets
torn down curtains
ripped out blankets
burnt book covers
broken empty cups,

because all that
are just signs of a show
that is about to be staged.
336 · Feb 2017
Why me, terrify me
Hadiy Syakir Feb 2017
I confront myself every night
struggling to make ends meet
wiped the dust off my thorny feet
but the moment I indulge
in the confusing exchange
the suffocating, the suffering
betray the ever-present inkling.

I dreamt of my freedom
soaring high
from the eruptive Damascus
with the destructive Andronicus
to the mighty nebula and burst
visible in the night sky
horrible to your naked eyes
and I knew if it happens,
my time, my fate
would end and I
could comprehend.

Release me
from this
terrifying temple
prosecuting throne
horrifying reefs
tormenting prison.

Mama shall burn me
tonight,
out of everyone’s sight.
336 · Nov 2017
Nothing is real
Hadiy Syakir Nov 2017
Nothing is real,
everything is a joke.
Nothing hits you,
nothing runs over you.

The only thing that truly defines the smack right on your face
that parallels to all this is
pain.

The real situation is full of
sadness, despair, depression, destruction.

It all lasts for more than hours, days, weeks, years,
totally the opposite of happiness.

Happiness,
it is fake, not real at all.

Ever had a moment of happiness that stay in your heart for years?
It is something unheard, but sadness, sadness
it will stay with you till the last breath.

Oh the laughter? The joke?
It all cracked upon by your desperate souls that wanting to make light of the situation, yes the situation.

The real truth.

Can you laugh and make light of your eventual demise?

If you are able to,
you are more than just a soul.
335 · Feb 2017
Misfiring Lines
Hadiy Syakir Feb 2017
I
won't
mourn
over
my
eventual
demise.

I
just
want
to
keep
in mind.

I
am
done
with
lies.

Walking
out
of
thin
line.

Running
o­ut
of
time.
Hadiy Syakir Oct 2018
We are
nothing but
supercalifragilisticexpialidocious


but we are
good at making ourselves look atrocious.
331 · Feb 2017
My dear
Hadiy Syakir Feb 2017
My dear,
you are the greatest of them all.
You don't have to worry that
the chimney is running out of fire.
You are the most powerful and
the most efficient gasoline
needed for in me, for your presence
and companion I will light up
the whole world,
You never left me in
bewilderment and perplexity
all you did was making me
lament at the thought of
the complexity.

22.5.2014
330 · Dec 2018
other half
Hadiy Syakir Dec 2018
What kind of world it is,
if the other half is satisfied at isolating the rest of it,
happy at letting it to be in
the dark over the whole idea, situation, and vision.

Even looking at the rest of it
invokes the other half of distrust and disgust.

Corrupting the idea
of a united world is the biggest treason committed towards the creation of mankind.
329 · Dec 2018
existential pt.6
Hadiy Syakir Dec 2018
spill
a glass
of water
on the floor,
quit staring
and leave it
as it is.

interdependent.
Hadiy Syakir Jun 2017
C'est la vie they said, but every moment they departed with the beautiful, delightful phrases that has mysteriously managed to distance itself from the that is you, you have failed again to realize the potential in you. You placed the burden in your mind, in the isolated chamber of yours, as if it's possible for you to fill in every inch of your sullen skeleton, you would. You have come to expect something that is living beyond the border of reality and in order for that to take into effect, the neglection of the genesis behind the seed of our life has to take place. Reality and truth, are the two things that have always been abandoned by greed and dishonesty that have been infesting our minds ever since we are doomed to feel the wrath of karma. We are the author of our own destiny and if we want to be happy, we should take control of the ship and for that to happen, I need a company to face the music and you are the reason that the ship is still afloat as it takes two to balance it. Everything is absurd but love.
319 · Jul 2017
If you love me
Hadiy Syakir Jul 2017
Love me
if you love me.

If you love me
why don't you
come here
and say
"I love you"

and we
can start anew.
316 · Nov 2018
Idea & Existence
Hadiy Syakir Nov 2018
The polemic exists
when the full circle persist;

The space in between?

A mess that you don't have to clean?

A question of what could have been?

The questions are valid
for the idea is not obsolete.
310 · Jan 2018
Stillness
Hadiy Syakir Jan 2018
the severe coldness shot me still
like
how your tenderness caught me still.
305 · Nov 2017
Life Abridged
Hadiy Syakir Nov 2017
Maybe
I am just too young

And
I don't possess an iron lung

But
I am definitely where your heart has sunk.
302 · Jun 2017
Tough Soul With No Ego
Hadiy Syakir Jun 2017
I am a tough soul
that has no ego,
I let it all pour,
the drain overflows
I will never win,
adding up to the sin
Jugra sees me fled
the scene with
stained pen and
****** paper
and I thought
the moment I left
gone, already gone,
disappeared, diminished
finally freed
but for all that, I am still there.

I am at the tower
looking around
but the weather
will check on the ground
and betray me,
betray me,
weakened and hungry
for truth and honesty
one day you'll triumph
over my disgusting failure
childless, spineless
and I will miss
all the thousand words
that you have never confessed.

They will never set me free,
and they will always remember me.
301 · Nov 2017
Detour
Hadiy Syakir Nov 2017
There is no passable route
to the eventual soulless rite
skidded floors,
frozen painted walls
enclosed in jupiter's rail
embossed in eyelids tail
contradictional theory
off the Savannah 101
piroutting our own soul
writing off our own role
state of devastation
lifted off the barley field
stuck in a time warp
the sky has been waiting
and turning and rolling
tired of never ending doubt
flung towards the soul
aghast with how it ends
the kingdom never arrives
but with face full of joy,
you rob everything off us.
297 · Feb 2017
The eternal destiny
Hadiy Syakir Feb 2017
It is great. It lasts forever.
It trumps life. It persuades time in no time.
It is full of uncertainties. It is an adventure.
It concludes everything. It is our home.

Denying its greatness
will only
make your own
looks like a desperate attempt
in asking for forgiveness.
294 · Jul 2017
Not a Storm in a Teacup
Hadiy Syakir Jul 2017
Such a
disappointment
I have placed
myself in a
confinement

and

lurking for hope
in desperation
is no longer
part of the
only question.
13/7/2017
286 · Jan 2018
new year, no fear
Hadiy Syakir Jan 2018
We are just running away
or after something
if it never turns dark
from right to left
counterclockwise
the beast is still
tough and wide awake
the latitude means the world
is not in a linear desperation
to feed the temptation
of failure and destruction.
283 · Feb 2017
The genius in the crowd
Hadiy Syakir Feb 2017
The genius in the crowd
it does not mean that they are loud
sometimes, they look just like the rest
but they are here to create the chaos
to every star, every meteor
in the entire infinite universe
they are not supposed to keep tight
being remote and ideally fit everyone's sight
and chased away the adrenaline
to crush the convex of the serpentine
they will never cause any harm
the time and space will always be there
waiting for its monster to grab it
while bleeding profusely by just doing it
as the stop watch ticking, closing down
on everything but nothing
they realize and aware of the potential
of losing any remembrance at their disposal
as they divert everything away from the sunshine
you will weep and sink into the oblivion
of eternal shadow and spirit
letting all your troubles and mistakes free and
knowing they have not hit the stride at all.
The genius in the crowd
does not mean that they do not look like the rest.
282 · Jun 2017
All in the past age
Hadiy Syakir Jun 2017
I am an old-fashioned ****
that is trapped in a cyber,
instant millenial era
I want to profess my love
to you over the airwaves
sandwiched between
blue monday, common people
and have a picnic at the park
crisps, juices and dog barks
are the only precious things
that will lift our spirits on
every days that are like sundays
when peace has failed to fulfill
the entire notion of an idle landfill
I want to march against the tyrant
and be with Jeremy and Malcolm
at the front, resisting the Krokodils
and defend the wall in Berlin
from falling all over this sacred land.

But now here I am,

scrolling through all
the madness, loneliness
desperation of a generation
following through the routines
that will not fail to appear as
fake, ignorance,
foolish, blood smeared
and expressing my emotions
over it is the most that I can do
posting on what I believe
is the best that I can do.

We are all dead, buried
**** into the lively deathbed
and the funny part is
we are all livid and sad,

At the same time,
all at the same time.
280 · Feb 2017
The isolated land
Hadiy Syakir Feb 2017
O' I can see that
things are much
clearer now
but somehow
I still don't like it
for your presence
is something
that I miss
seeing you move around
is pleasantly
destroying my ground
like how we have fought
and I thought
that I was an
absolute Messiah
but I was wrong.

You are the moon
that reflects the light
from the everpresent
Mata Hari
without you
my world is dark
and clueless.

Please, don't make another move,
may the constellation
soon collide
so that I can be with you
and shed the brightest light.

Forever.
278 · Dec 2018
buku itu
Hadiy Syakir Dec 2018
antologi itu
adalah
aliran
air deras
dari puncak
gunung
manakala
puisi
adalah
anak-anak
alunan
buih lunak
di kaki
terjunan.
276 · Jul 2017
this empty space
Hadiy Syakir Jul 2017
Nothing has
taken place
in this empty
cold and dark
remote room
it has been
and always will be
empty.

I can hear the
punching
on the table
the hard slamming
of the door
the shouting
of an ecstasy rage
from the outside
but still in here
in my little, cramped
secluded room
it is just silence.

There is nothing
for me
to command
in this
empty space
a wise, old
drunk man
once said
'don't try'
and somehow
it turns out
to be true
that everything
is here
not to be tried
and for all the
emptiness in it
there is nothing
for me
to command
in this
empty space.

There is nothing
for me
to wander around
in this empty space
there is no
road, street
or alley
for me to go
back and forth
but there is
always this
static presence
of feeling
of nature
of instinct
that has been
squashing me
sitting on me
telling me
to run and jump
frantically, wildly
just to see that
it bores nothing
and there is nothing
for me
to wander around
in this
empty space.

This empty space
can't be filled
this empty space
can't be replaced
this empty space
can't be changed
for
this empty space
has always been
empty
and it will
always be.
20/12/2015
267 · Feb 2017
Number on paper
Hadiy Syakir Feb 2017
With money
you are happy
with money
you will act silly
with money
you will not be lonely
with money
you do not need this body
with money
you can always be free
with money
you don't want to be
anything that you can be.
with money
nothing is left for you to see.
but with money
you cannot buy the empathy
and with money
you cannot buy
your sanity.
267 · Nov 2017
The only lair for you
Hadiy Syakir Nov 2017
When the air hits my chest
it reminds me of the place
where you come to rest
when the rain strikes on my face
it misses your lost lips
that used to wander in daze
when the wind wipe my wrist
it recalls me of the place
where you used to call a bliss
awestruck, wonderstruck
was the only game
but now, dumbstruck
is the only known fame.

this is
the only lair for you
so I am not worried
if you lost your way.
Hadiy Syakir Mar 2018
How similar
we are
antonym is
turned into
the antidote
to the decaying
synonym.

There are only
two outcomes
out of this similarity;

burst of the sun
or a flower off the gun.
Hadiy Syakir Jul 2017
A song starts, and it will end.

Eventually.

I will play your song all over again.
As the outside just started to rain,
and I light the joint to heal the pain.
All this time, even in the
tiniest, tightest lane,
I don't have to think, I always knew
the outcome.

And knowing that you have reached
the plateau, I feel numb.

My endorphins have never failed me.
Every time the tune crawled and bit my doldrums,
it did not fail me.

I feel fine, and everything shines.
I am done, and nothing put me off the lines.
I just had to, and it feels so true.
I love you, I love you, I love you.
I miss you, and I wish that you knew.

25/2/2014
25/2/2014
264 · Sep 2017
Redefine a life
Hadiy Syakir Sep 2017
Look at the babies
they are sweet, free
and pure
everyone adores
them, yet you;

you
are everything
that contradicts them
when you were
just one of them,
not long
ago.
263 · Feb 2017
No recess
Hadiy Syakir Feb 2017
So you thought
that you can run
away,
escape from
all the misery
pain
and tragedy.

You give your best
you try
every option
of escapism
that available
upon you,
you thought
everything will
disappear
once you move away
from the place
that you stand.

But,
you are wrong
those things
won't simply
go away.

Never.
262 · Nov 2017
way, way further
Hadiy Syakir Nov 2017
Ride the bus every day
till the sun makes its way
out of chaos,
the temperamental blues
like a dog going after
the isolated leaf
searching for the breath
of eternal grief.

send me over
a postcard
of tense yesterday
push me further
than where you departed
during the doomsday
hallelujah is the last hurrah.

Another day, another way
till summer rain, till winter sane
drifting away, drifting away,
way, way further,
way, way further.
261 · Feb 2017
Poetry
Hadiy Syakir Feb 2017
There is no
calmness
and happiness
in poetry
those things won't
just fit in.
All that's left
in this
is madness
emptiness
and hopelessness.

When Socrates
said in Phaedrus
that poetry
is a form of
madness,
he must
have encountered
a truly, beautiful
mess.
260 · Feb 2017
A Year Has Gone
Hadiy Syakir Feb 2017
For more than a year
we never met each other
and nothing turns out any
better;

it is just an illusion of time that makes us suffer.

while I am busy
stitching up the patches
you are distracted by the
marching orders.
as every single particles
seem to be the same
there is nothing for us to
blame
the lilium has died
disgusted at the idea of
having it sprinkled
all over your dress
and those kids were never
born
shamed at the thought
of me lifting them all over my
face.
I think we are just too shy
to admit that we are
desperate
desperate enough to cover
up the memories
to run away from all the
reality
and to realize
that nothing ever change
since that day.
255 · Feb 2017
Possess nothing
Hadiy Syakir Feb 2017
I possess nothing,
no power
or authority,
all I have is
this body, mind
and soul,
and I wish nothing
will stumble upon it,
as I will change
all the directions
and possessions
towards the
eternal space and hole
that I have created and breathe
for you to contend with.

Everything is out
of my hand,
and it is hard for me
to understand.
Hadiy Syakir Feb 2017
There was a cotton candy
wrapped with a bleeding ham
on my spineless lap
the lady luck smiled at me
while handing me
a burning, fiery horseradish
and while I'm shaking
at the point of receiving,
I felt free and relieved.

I took turn
ramming it up my mouth
one by one
pieces by pieces
yes I did, I did
sado masochism
Sade barbarism
but it felt nothing
out of this world
I felt at ease, I felt at home.

I bit my lips and wanted more.
but nothing could have
satisfied me,
and I always knew it.

I command myself to do so,
so do I.
247 · Nov 2017
Poetry and Bigotry
Hadiy Syakir Nov 2017
The moment has gone
and so does our bond.

One day we'll go at it again
and all this won't go in vain.

It's best if we don't breed
if for most of the time
we let our sisters
and brothers bleed.

Give me a wild poetry
I'll bow out quietly.

Show me a pale bigotry
I'll grow out saintly.

You're the last messiah
I am the last pariah
well teach me something else
before I disappear.

in
every death of my weary cells.
246 · Feb 2017
Reincarnate my fate
Hadiy Syakir Feb 2017
It takes me years
to go to nowhere
I've been waiting
for the moonlight
to wrap me up
for the sunshine
to burn me up
but I can't let go
the pain of not wanting
a revenge on the
sight of deity goddess.
What we ought to know is something that we will never know.
243 · Jun 2017
this world poetry day
Hadiy Syakir Jun 2017
this world poetry day
is meaningless,
Maya, Charles, Sylvia, Allen
never even thought of it
it breeds more seed of
ego and monstrosity
deep inside those men
to lift their hands and
push us down the drain
to ensure that
we are stuck in between
honesty and reality,
forever.
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