am I a sicko
wanting something different
from what I should want?

how can I long for you
when I've only loved you in a dream?

you called me heartless
but I think you lost your heart
somewhere on the way

when nothing seems to hurt or pain my soul
no knife nor murderous weapon there reside
some feeling lingers through my body whole
a numbness blinding every sense inside

for just as too much darkness in the night
can force you into the abyss of sleep
it is the excess of the brightest light
that keeps you from the life you wish to reap

for the distractions of the joys we hold
might keep us from the blade that we so fear
but also these great treasures dressed in gold
will hold us back from shedding any tear

although I’m overjoyed no darkness comes
I know that all I really am is numb

it's weird that sometimes
when you study books
so hard
and so long
you discover
how every little thing
everyday
has a meaning too

some historical allusion
or literary illusion
that tells you exactly how someone feels about you
or how you feel about them too.

so maybe all those studies
weren't always a waste
maybe the real meaning behind all of it is that
they want you to give you a taste
of all the symbolism of things
before you're too late

I noticed devices,
the signs used in books to foreshadow
to hint at the written future
and at what is ahead to come

like our strides while we walked
or the difference in our shadows
that hints at our now-passed future
and at what has already come

it has been six months now
half a year since we have grown apart
and I'm not asking for you back
to be as close as we had come

just please think about me
was I important to you at all
if you left me as fast as you did
even as close as we had come?

just please think about us
and I'm still not asking for you back
it's just something to think of
if you have time left for me, love

the rocks were cool and rough
under the dark sky last night.
into the vacuum we looked up;
the stars were somehow both dim and bright.
they laid twinkling on their black bed,
as a people, the moon was their king.
he had shown down like a spotlight to the sparkling water,
his reflection danced on the dark stage.
the audience chirped,
and we sat talking by the shoreline,
and all the city lights and noises disappeared
in the beauty of the night.