A new face.
Curiosity surfaces.
Wonder and wait.
Will we go places?

Heart's alive.

Help me please.
This is a disaster, you see.
It's not suppose to be like this,
You and me.
It doesn't exists.
And I'm trying to resist
I cannot believe this.
I think I am crazy.
But honestly,
what can I do?

Do you think this way too?
Maybe.
But God only knows.
And God won't tell me.
I won't ask.
But I do miss you.

Maybe tonight I'll get high.
I'll escape to the sky.
Far away from earth,
far away from these thoughts.

This time,
I won't get shot down.
The arrows are aiming.
but I have a shield.


You and me.
It doesn't exist.

Heart's alive.

Arrow pierced me.
I wasn't looking.
Now I'm falling.

Tell me this isn't happening.
Again...

Heart's alive.
Help me please.

I'm falling.
This is a disaster you see.

It's not my fault...

Something is always the influence
How do we know if...
we are
truly
original?

And my Father spoke to me.

No mind is fashioned alike
No palm is moulded the same
No fingerprint identifies with another

You are my Masterpiece.
You are my original.
You were created
so you too,
may create...

but never forget
the One who fashioned
your original mind.

Don't you know
it is always Me,
giving you
the influence you always seek?

Whether the heavens cry
or shine brightly
whether the seas roar
of if they gently lick the shore
she will be there
dancing,
dancing her sorrows away.

As long as her heart beats
As long as she has reason
she will never stop
dancing her demons away.

I wish I was someone I am not
or ever will be.

I am so sorry for doubting
this masterpiece
a painting unfinished.
unable to fully see.

I am so sorry.

Nobody wants to be
the first to say I miss you
You do.
I know in my heart  you do.
Say it.
But I know in my heart
you won't.

Once the sun,
now the moon.

A flower that refuses to die.

Breathe in.
Breathe out.

You're alive.
You're awake.

Breathing feels good.

Your blood is moving
The rhythm of your soul!
Embrace it!

Smile at strangers.
Smile at the mirror.

Today,
Tomorrow,
& Tonight, I will win a battle.

If you can breathe,
and find a reason to smile,
may you win many battles.

I am your ally.
I will tell you
of the greatest gift,
of the greatest power,
of the greatest weapon,
this world has ever known,

if you ask me


Breathe in.
Breathe out.

You are everywhere, Eros
Everywhere but here
holding my hand,
looking deeply into my eyes
and beating within.
You can't hide from me, Eros,
I see you on her lips.
I see you in his gaze.

Eros, I dream of you
I cry for you
I wish for you
and I pray for you.
Eros, grasping you
is like trying to catch smoke
within my hands.
Eros, you like are smoke.
because you cause me to suffocate.  

Eros, you are hiding in his heart.
A heart that is not in range
to hear my rhythm.
Look for me. Listen to my song.
I'm the dreamer, dreaming out loud
sleeping under the tree.
Wake me up, Eros,
so together we may climb.

Eros,
I miss you.

Hello October
Can we be friends?
I felt alone in the summer,
it was all pretend.
Now I miss the stars
and I miss the trees
I miss the feeling love gave me.
It's not hopeless, no.
A hero is coming,
please don't let this be
just another fantasy.
Hello October,
I'm glad we're friends.
I love seeing Autumn life again.

Whatever we are doing

We are doing alright

That doesn't mean it's easy

It just means we are fighters

She is restlessly gathering feathers
This child wants to fly more than ever

Our bodies were not made for the skies
They told her over and over

Refusing to believe,
she continued to dream,
even as she grew older.

I dream of lakes that are mirrors
I dream a thousand miles away
where the pine trees whisper
and the birds sing a symphony
where the stag walks next to me
and the fox follows close behind
I dream of the mountains in the refection
I dream so far away from here.

Silent when I want to speak.
Crying when I want to laugh.
Alone when I want to embrace.

No,
I cannot utter the smallest sound.
And that is all it takes...

I thought my heart was dead.
maybe it was his electric blue eyes
that brought it back to life.

He was a beautiful stranger.
A boy named Jean.

We met in the city,
A brand new chapter
We were both about to open

We were the new artists in town.

But why should he choose me?
I hated my heart for beating too loudly
Muffling my common sense
that a boy like Jean
wouldn't love a girl like me.

Small talk and short glances,
I was afraid to look into his eyes
They might've drowned me.

Stupid heart.
You wouldn't stand a chance.

And I was right.
One autumn afternoon
we studied history as friends
and he saw the most breakable part of me
Accidentally.

Only to find a few days later
He had already chosen someone else.

My heart began to crack again.

Will I always be vulnerable
to beautiful strangers,
Even if they become friends?

Yes. It might be love.
But maybe just infatuation.
It might be the chemistry.
But I get lost in a fantasy.
Too far to pursue.
Too much risk perhaps.
Yes. It might already be over.
But maybe it's only beginning.
Yes. I know I will see you again.
But what happens then?

I'm almost always uncomfortable.

I said.

She told me to just pretend.

Pretend you are comfortable,
with who you are
with what you see
It will take some time
but you will learn and love
who you are meant to be.

I love you to pieces.

She tells me constantly.
I love you too
even if it doesn't pass these lips.
In my heart, I know
you are my best friend
and I'd be nowhere
if you and I were alike.

I love you more then any other on this planet.
and I will pretend for you,
so that I may grow to love me too.

As I am now.
I don't miss you.

who you were then.
You played with my heart.

Just one day.
You took away so much time...

I would go back.
Why do you want to go back?

To feel alive again.

You will only get hurt.

I know.

I feel like a fetus,

unborn and cradled inside

the only world I know,

unaware that soon

I will have to leave

this form of innocence.

the purest moments

of a human life,

to be exposed

to everything

that will try to rob me

of my purity,

Do I have to leave,

Forever?

May we meet again,
Hoping my heart is immune
to falling in love with you,
all over again.

My sweet darkness,
My twilight,
My home.
When will I return?
I long to escape this light
where I am nothing more than his shadow.
I am nothing here…
Nothing.
And she looked at me with such grace.
Such mercy…
This world is not hopeless it seems.

Cupid teases me in the night
like a ghost,
invading my dreams.
He meddles with my ever-altering
unconscious mind,
a world I wish I could remember
before it gets swept away.
Please cupid, stop playing games.
He doesn't miss me.
Upon any unlikely encounter,
the last thing I would see is a delighted smile
let alone his warm embrace.

They say when you dream about someone,
that person is missing you.

Sounds like wishful thinking to me.

It's hard to say
if there's ever been a day
without the lies
getting into my head
choking, teasing, pinching
as my eyes devour the image I see
and make me feel this way.
This is what I pray,
to have new eyes
to wash them clean
take away their swords
with a flower in place
Help my spirit survive
in this temporary temple
to love my body.
to love my face.

There will be a day,
I've put up quite the fight
for these new eyes
for a different form of light.

May I be victorious tonight.

Maybe there is no escaping this infection.
Maybe there is no cure.
The moment he touched my heart
I fell from the sky.

I've been trying to get off this land
for far too long.
I belong in the sky.

I cannot believe it.
You took me down again.

*I cannot forgive myself for this.

This is the end

On the ground and in the mud
Body trembling and body curling
As if I were returning to the womb

This is the end

It came from the sky
and death rolled to me
in the shape of an egg
I was ready to die

This is the end

Eyes closed
waiting for the end,
but the end never came
it was a dead grenade

Not today death, not today.

French press.
Coffee beans.
I just can't get it.
The right balance.
All I want is to do
is to make the perfect brew.
The perfect cup.
Energizing.
Revitalizing.
Satisfying.
Barista style.
If I can't even do that,
If I can't even make
a single decent cup,
what am I doing here...

I just end up with stained porcelain.

Familiar strangers are everywhere.
Some look like you,
remind me of you.
On Kensington Avenue
there is a man
I have talked to.
Why?
Perhaps because I thought
he looked a bit like you.
Though he was much older.
He could almost be a much older you...
He could almost be your dad..
maybe...
He is a shopkeeper
In the market
of finely hand-crafted bags.
The market...
One of my favourite places to be.
So many interesting people
So many curious places.
You would love it here.
The man was so friendly.
His deep brown eyes
just like yours.
He gave me perfume.
Remember I told you
about the perfume I was wearing?
It was years ago...
but I remember.
He was a man on Kensington Ave.
A familiar stranger.
Friendly to me.
Perhaps I was too friendly to him.
He reminded me of you.
And sent me into
this nostalgic wander.
Your eyes.
I miss your eyes.
I miss your messy hair.
I miss your voice.
I'm crazy.
I miss you.

****** I'm crazy.

I wish this bitter-sweet nostalgia
would end.
Because it's not like
I am ever to see or hear
from you...
ever again.

All because I walked down Kensington Ave.
And met that friendly man.