you are a mix of witty and serious, and of laughter and opinions. you are mostly calm but sometimes an over thinker, like a spoonful of sugar with a dash of salt.
i crave your little exhibit that slow arching of your back and soft sigh of moans that sounds surrender hair pulling, teeth-gritting thrill and the strong urge of shivery legs
I did. I have always prepared myself for the worst even if I did not expect it from him. I have brought myself in the exact situation a few weeks back & I have the answers already in my hand waiting to be poured out.
"then why did you left him? Love fixes things ya' know?"
"Because love doesnt cheat in the first place." I said.
lullabies were screams of what ifs morning alarms were screech of regrets had overthinking for breakfast anxiety attacks for lunch and dinner served me spoonful of stress
/she was my favorite flavored ice cream full of cashew nuts, marshmallows, chocolate chips, creamy vanilla drizzled with chocolate syrup and I wanted a spoonful of her goodness/
Just in case you'll leave, i'll keep on reminding myself of two things, (1) Just like the waves, you'll come back or (2) Just like waves, you'll never will which Im both not certain of.
Nobody wants pain I mean c'mon just imagine Your heart turns into an ice cold pounding monster it breaks into two shattered into pieces.
The butterflies you have felt is in chaos growling, whimpering and losses its colorful shades not the way you turned them to be.
Your knees that keep you standing had betrayed you and they keep on making those jelly positions that as soon as you felt you feel like falling.
The air keeps you alive but you have a stressful sigh as you imagine the what ifs in every decision you have.
Your eyes is way too weak full of blurry vision and you just realize how a teardrop rushed down from your eyes down to your cheeks.
Your lips withered like a rose that lies along the street once in a bloom turned to die.
Your mind is in nostalgic state reminiscing the past cherishing the moments and it breaks you.
It felt as if everything you once have is pulling you down like you have no one to lean on like your self betrayed you like you will never go back to the way you used to be like you lose a fight which you had been waiting all your life and that breaks you the most.
Once I dived into a black sea I thought it would be clear I though I would find answers I thought I could disembark that easy but a chain on my foot named thoughts keeps on pulling me against the current I thought I can float on my own I thought the sea was part of me but it wasnt, it was not what it turned out.
The thought of being normal sounds terrifying you have to do certain things that should reach standards beyond the rules are completely insane and theres limitations in accordance to your flight of ideas How can you lock yourself? Why are you doing this? And then after many years... Youll regret most of your life decisions and imagine the what-ifs that should be done.
I'm one of the optimistic person you'll ever meet In the realistic world ever existing I will lay all possible cards from the Beginning 'til the end with the options Chances & risk Unfortunately, the negative thoughts Keeps on flushing me down Drowning all the positive ones Once, it was all ocean full of positivity The next thing, its a puddle swallowed By the soil of liabilities