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Erin-Taylor Feb 2018
When we’re young, all we can think about is growing older.

I remember when I was 11 years old, I could hear myself saying how all I wished was to be 16 years old. (Funny, I know, but when I was 11, the cool age was 16!). And now that the time has gone and passed, it feels eerie thinking about how young I once was and how you never really see how much you change over time.

I look at myself now, 20 years old, and haven’t come to terms with how I don’t want my life to pass by too quickly. Everyone says that high school goes by before you know it; for me it did. Even as I go through the motions of college, it’s flying by me.

Each day on the calendar is another mark I check off as passed.

Everyone is always looking forward to something; like a work party next Friday or even dinner on Sunday, but no one ever really stops to live in the moment.

We as people, are always looking forward and reminiscing the past, but never live in the present. And funnily enough, as each day passes, you can’t tell you’ve grown or aged.

As each birthday passes, do you actually feel any older?

Until one day you wake up in the house you own with your significant other, possibly with kids, going to the same job for 15+ years, what happened to your life?

Did you feel yourself getting older? I know this is out of the blue, but it’s scary to think how quickly life passes you by, until one day it’s over.

That’s why we should always remember the good times in the past, but not stay in them; we should always think about the future and strive for better things…but we should always remember where we are. Right here and right now.

Live for today, before you run out of tomorrows.
Erin-Taylor Jun 2017
Do you ever look back at old photos..and just the memory is so strong,
That it brings you back in such a deep pull,
That you can almost place yourself right in that photo, sitting in your best friend's car...
You can almost smell your surroundings, like the interior of her car and the freshener.
You can almost remember exactly how you felt in that moment--
You can think of how happy you were, how things were changing for you...

But now they're just memories and they can not be relived again, only remembered.
I miss that.
Erin-Taylor May 2016
i thought i could be the girl

who would change you for the better

and everyone would know me as

the one who saved you from yourself.
The title is actually what it reads
Erin-Taylor Apr 2016
I think I'm the most upset because I've never not been in a relationship and I'm willingly walking away from this one and I feel like I'm going to be all alone. I feel like, if I'm by myself, no one will care about me or love me. Maybe I'm just in denial and insecure, but I've never actually taken the chance to find myself and that's all I think I've ever needed. I need approval from myself before I need it from any guy.
Erin-Taylor Jan 2016
Life is a confusing maze you fumble through,
Hoping that once you get out,
It will have been worth something..
Erin-Taylor Jan 2016
I'd like to say that I've conquered all of my demons...but I haven't.
I still think of you.
I still listen to the voicemail I saved that you sent me a year and a half ago.
My heart still pounds when I hear your voice, just continuously hoping you'd say, "I love you" again.
But tonight, I willed myself not to give in.
I can't give in to you anymore.
Besides...there's no use in crying over a lost cause.
I can't stop thinking
  Jan 2016 Erin-Taylor
You see, forgetting you
is not a one time thing
it's a constant daily battle
stop thinking about him
remember the times
he stood you up
remember the times
he broke your heart
remember the things
he said in his anger
remember the way
he left you all alone
remember how
he gave no explanation
oh but remember
the roses he brought you
remember the late night conversations
remember the first time
he told you he loved you
remember the secrets
he confided in you
no, stop
remember what's good for you
remember he's not good for you
remember what you deserve
forget him every day
every morning when you wake up
and your brain wants to bring him up
remember the nights you spent
crying on your bed
remember your best friend
cursing his name
remember your mother
cursing herself for not stopping you
remember your brother
cursing himself for not protecting you
remember the days at the hospital
the pills, the drops, the shots
remember what is best for you
he is not best for you
remember that
and forget him
every year
every month
every week
every day
every second
if that's what it takes
2016 will be a better year.
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