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  Apr 2019 Disgracing the World
Lily X
I didn't want you,
I wanted love
and I have realised
that they are not the same thing.

You were a mold
that I poured my insecurities in,
a computer I tried to program.

But you are a sky,
stormy and clear and rainy and warm.

You were so blue when I longed for red.

I didn't want you.
I wanted the thought.
  Apr 2019 Disgracing the World
My soul splits in two
The moment I see you

You destroy what was made
My debt has been paid

I have nothing to fear
As death draws me near

His breath on my face
I’m leaving this place

His kiss is deadly deep
I return it as I weep

All thought leaves me
As I fall to sleep
I spill out my heart
She reply's with a word
Why is it this hard
Am I not being heard

I show my affection
She shows me none
Is this her intention
I think I'm just done...
Doesn't feel good
You're the angel of my dreams
The hero of my nightmares
You're always there for me
When life's too much to bare
Why have I become
This hopeless burden
What have I done
How did this began

Why won't she admit
I'm just a bother
We both know it
And that I'm sure
I annoy the **** out of her, I just wish she enjoyed talking to me as much as I do her
We talked for a day
I was instantly in love
But there's no way
Is this really love

Just the thought of her
Sends me shivers
But I can't be sure
Until I kiss her
A really sloppy poem
I abuse them
They abuse me
But I let them
They help me see

They call it drugs
I call it cure
They're far better than hugs
They help rid all my fear
Pills feel good
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