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2.4k · Oct 2017
What happened next
Middy Oct 2017
You can't take it
You can't live with it
The pain is too much
The kids at school
They keep hurting you
Or maybe it was your father
Maybe your mother
Maybe they're both dead
Like how you will be soon
Maybe you're in love with abusers
Maybe you are simply sad
But either way
You can't take it anymore

You take a rope from the attic
You grab a gun from the cuboard
You steal a knife from the kitchen
You're at the bridge over the river
You're on a railway with a train
Wherever you are
Whatever you have
It doesn't matter now

You take a rope from the attic
The kids at school
They taunt you and laugh
They say they wish you were dead
Well their wish is coming true
You're suffocating
You're silent
You're gone

You grab a gun from the cuboard
Safety is off
You're in your room
You whisper a goodbye
To the father who hurt you
To the brother who loves you
BANG
The shot can be heard for miles
You're gone

You steal a knife from the kitchen
Your mother's prying eyes
Who breaks your heart
With hateful words
You're in your bathroom
You hold the knife to your wrist
Your lifeline is bleeding out
The blood is on the white floor
You're gone

You're on a bridge
There's a cold and fast flowing
River of tears and sorrow
Your mother is gone
Your father is gone
Time for you to go
You leave your other family
Who are grieving with you
You jump
You fall
You're gone

You're at a railway with a train
Ready to hit you with pain
It wouldn't be the driver's fault
It was the abuser
You thought loved you
But you were wrong
You are hit by the train
It stops with your broken heart
You're gone

Where is the rope burn?
It burns your parents
They weep and wail
They lost their child
They're sunk into a sea of sadness
They read the note
They beg dear god above
" why were we not enough? "

Who did you shoot?
Your brother's chest
He's staring silently
At his sibling's dead body
As he stutters and sobs
He wonders
" why was I not enough? "

Who was stabbed?
Why your sister
She doesn't know who to talk to
She doesn't know who can help
As she screams for the neighbors
As your heartbeat stops
" why was I not enough? "

Who drowned?
The family you left behind
Your uncle is silent
Your aunt is shocked
Your cousins, your grandparents
They cant believe it
" why were we not enough? "

Where is the wound?
It bleeds in your friends' hearts
No matter how many you have
Or rather had
They can't stop crying
They can't stop thinking
" why were we not enough? "

Your name is in the papers
You're on the front covers
The world is full of tears
The news reporter is upset
There's a book with your name
There's ****** roses on your grave
Marked with your name

You stop
You think
You put away the rope
You put the gun back
You replace the knife
You walk away from the bridge
You run off the railway
You hide your tears in the rain
But you think
Think, think.
Maybe you can live one more day
Or two days, three days,
Four days, five days, six days
A week or two
A month or more
A year or so
Maybe forever
You won't take away the pain by killing yourself. All you'll do is pass it on
People care, I promise they do.
If no one does, I do.
2.0k · Sep 2017
The Bystander
Middy Sep 2017
Here in this little tale
That I am going tell
Is a simple scenario with three main roles
Starring
A bully, a victim and a bystander

The victim is walking down the hall
And thinking about his life
He lost his father in the lake of sorrow
While his mother fell off it's bridge

The bully is being abused
Which is giving him an excuse
To roam the halls like a prison warden
Or a ghost in a haunted home

The bully sees the victim
They catch each other's eye
An evil glare comes out of the bully's eye

The victim tries to escape
Yet he's caught before he can
And now blood is dripping down
upon the hallway floors
The victim is screaming ****** ******
And begging for mercy
The bully laughs and hits him harder
No remorse or regret

What's the role of the bystander?
Does he run for help?
Does he call out for a teacher?
Does he run and save the victim?
Does he do a thing?

The sad answer is no
He only stands there and stares
More heartless than a body
Made of solid stone

Will you be the victim's hero?
Will you help him out?
Will you join the bully's side?
Will you beat him up?
Will you be a bystander
and not do a thing?
It's up to you
You decide

Who are you going to be?
The hero, the bystander or the bully.
1.5k · Jun 2018
Have Pride
Middy Jun 2018
They preach about pride
“Pride is a sin!”
People nod obediently
“Two men kissing is a sin!”
A few more obedient nods

WHAT ARE WE?
Slaves? Do we obey all the things
That a silly old book says
To get to a place most probably
Will never see
Since they’ve committed just one
ONE SIN?

Two men kissing
Sounds harmless as a butterfly
Two girls kissing
Sweet as sugar

It’s fine to be yourself
Boy, girl, both or none
It’s accepted in the animal kingdom
Why not the human one?
Are you scared of a book?
A book that controls how you act
How you talk, speak, pray?

Have pride everyone!
Have pride in yourself!
Who you are!
Who you want to be!
BECAUSE SOMEONE
SOMEONE IN THIS BEAUTIFUL
GREEN/BLUE PLANET
WILL LOVE YOU FOR IT!
Not only is this for LGBT but I feel that people are just brought up into a religion and forced into it. Like how most are forced to see that LGBT is a bad thing. I hope people have the ability to choose their faith, their path in life and not be bullied or hurt for doing so. And the thing about the animal kingdom is true! There are several gay animals like penguins, sheep, flamingos, giraffes and lion! So there is ‘pride’ (pun intended, I regret nothing) in the animals kingdom: but not in the human Kingdom. All over some book that says we can’t.
1.4k · Sep 2017
Death To The Victims
Middy Sep 2017
A single boy
A cross around his neck
Praying in the church he loves
Even though they throw sticks
Even though they throw stones
Words can never hurt him
He's praying to his father saying
" I really love this boy!
I'm sorry father but I love him so
I know you wouldn't mind
But I want you to know that "

A single girl
School uniform on
She's saying to her only best friend
" I love girls is it wrong?
I don't know what to do!
My father will **** me
My mother will too!
I love this one girl
Sitting in my maths class.
I hope she's my friend
Hope she feels the same "

When the kids at school discover
These two humans' secrets
They are laughing and laughing
And shoving them to the floor
As the support comes in
Saying " this is not right
Screaming at these innocent saying
" DEATH TO THESE VICTIMS
WHO COMMITED A SIN
GOD DOES NOT ALLOW THIS "
" If he really doesn't..."
A quiet voice replied
" Then why are they allowed to
Exist like me and you? "
Inspired after I got bullied in school for supporting LGBT :(
1.2k · Nov 2017
Words can't hurt me
Middy Nov 2017
“ sticks and stones
may break my bones but
words will never hurt me ”
What a lie
What a scandal
What a stupid quote

We are Human
We aren't immortal
We aren't immune
to pain and words

If words can't hurt me
Then why do they bleed
Into my ****** wrists
And scarred thighs
Why do they stun me
Into tears and heartbreak
Why do I reach for the razor
And mix bitter tears
With red liquid
On the white bathroom floor

Why do they cause
Broken hearted lovers
To keep from bridges
Tear stained faces
To be mourned for
At funerals
Why do they cause
A gun to be shot
And the bullet
It will hit
The gunner

“ sticks and stones
May break my bones
but words will always **** me. ”
I was thinking about that quote and wonder how it came up
Words will always hurt others
They always will
Middy Oct 2017
I hate school I will hate school
I hated school I hate school
I will hate school I hated school
I hate school I hated school
I will hate school I hate school
I hated school I hate school
I hate school I will hate school
I will hate school I hate school
    I hated school I will hate school
I hate school I hated school
I will hate school I hated school
I hated school I hate school
I hate school I will hate school

SEE HOW THE USE OF THE WORD SCHOOL IS BECOMING More AND MORE BORING THE MORE YOU READ IT

THEREFORE YOU GET MORE BORED THE MORE YOU ATTEND IT!

I will shoot someone at work
I shot someone at their house
I had shot someone in the shop
I shot someone during a concert
I will shoot someone during class
I had shot someone in the heart
I shot someone while they slept
I will shoot someone tonight
I shot someone now
I had shot someone yesterday

SEE HOW MANY TIMES AND PLACES PEOPLE HAVE BEEN SHOT!
SO WHY DOES THE SHOOTER NOT GET BORED

The bomb exploded
The bomb will explode
The bomb had exploded
The bomb will explode
The bomb exploded
The bomb will explode
The bomb had exploded
The bomb exploded
The bomb will explode
The bomb had exploded
The bomb will explode
The bomb exploded
The bomb had exploded
The bomb will explode
The bomb exploded

WHY DO WE GET SICK OF THE WORD BOMB?
WHEN THEY ARE BLOWN ALL OVER THE WORLD?
Inspired by a small paragraph in the book My Name Is Mina by David Almond
I agree with hating school, don't get me wrong I love education
But I feel schools are like cages or prisons, the teacher is the warden.
Sorry for it being so long it if I get anything wrong
751 · May 2018
Daft
Middy May 2018
So I’m daft?
Just because I blast music to escape
The complaining household I’m in
And this planet that appears to be
Ever so loud and uncaring
Yet they apologise
As if it'll solve world hunger

I’m daft becuase my cat like ears
Hear all the groans and sighs
Hearing all the kids in class scream
And you two talking about me
Under your wasted breath

I’m daft because I prefer to be
Alone in my room where I’m safe
And away from you both

So I’m daft
Just cos I barely eat meat
And prefer to read rock magazines
Than old books and girly magazines

I'm daft because I prefer to sleep in a bunk bed
With no one sleeping on the top bunk
Because I'm daft! I'm daft, that's why!
Inspired by something my mum called me while I nearly walked off without her.
736 · Nov 2017
The Mistress of Earth
Middy Nov 2017
Mother Nature is watching
These humans wasting her magic
Burning it
Cutting it
Wasting it away

She wants it used for good
For the children to play with
For the homeless to have homes
For humans to breathe away
At the luxury of her air

BUT NO
IT WILL ALL BE GONE SOON
ALL BECAUSE
OF
YOU
641 · Oct 2017
A Kiss in the Rain
Middy Oct 2017
It was raining today
Everything's dark and grey
I'm pushed to the ground
As I make it to school
It was barely first period

" hey, need help? "

My friend is there
He's my sunshine
The only person I've ever had
He gives me his soft hand
And I'm up on my feet again

" you got a black eye "
He said and touched it gently
Making my cheeks rosy pink
And my face wince in pain

We're in the back of the school
He's putting cream on my eye
It's crying tears of sorrow
As he wipes them away gently

" it's ok. It'll be ok. "

He whispers in the rain
We're under the umbrella
No one can see us
Maybe God can

" I love you. "

He whispers again
As a smile forms on my lips
Which he kisses
As the rain pours down
No one knew
It was just us
No one could see us

He slowly pulled away
From the gentle kiss in the rain
As I whisper back his words

" I love you too. "
615 · Dec 2017
Red Hands
Middy Dec 2017
You.
You’re guilty
Of breaking a glass heart
It was an angel
An angel you chose
And you broke them
You.
You have red hands
Red liquid
Dripping from your ruby lips
And from your nails
And your knife
And you shot them
You broke their glass heart
Now you’re guilty
You could’ve been happy
With them
You could’ve lived happily
With them
But no
No
You chose to break
Break them
Break their glass heart
With your red hands
Explain why people just break hearts like it’s the most normal thing in the world. It’s cruel and you’d hate it if it happened to you
So why do you do it?
594 · Oct 2017
A Bad Day
Middy Oct 2017
Hello mother, hello father
I’m doing fine
No I ain’t I cried again today

Hello teacher, little preacher
Why are you screaming
Cos your shouts make me want to
Shout out loud myself

Hello sister, little mistress
It’s ok I’m fine
Just had another bad day
Which I can’t get out my mind

Hello brother, from another
I had a horrible day
Just leave me to be locked away
Far from my reality
Based off of a bad day I had yesterday
I had a meltdown and my English teacher was the only teacher who cared
575 · Oct 2017
Forever Alone
Middy Oct 2017
I'm all alone
In this bright blue sea
That's turning grey in the dark
But I could cope
I used to

But now I can't
I'm alone on the wooden dock
Where boats lie on the sides
With shells and seaweed
Scattered around them

The sand used to feel so warm
Now it's colder than the ice cream
You'd give me and you'd laugh
Your deep gentle laugh
That I missed so dear

" hello poppet! "
You would say as I would hug him
Kiss his wrinkled and rough cheek
I'd hang upside down on my bed
As I wished him goodnight
You would smile and chuckle
On those lonely nights

You'd fly wooden airplanes
In the green parks
You'd throw them so far away
Now I fly alone
No one to turn to
No one to love

Your hair was silver as ice
Your smile wider
Than a child at play
You were a giant
You were so tall and strong
Yet you were so gentle
So kind and loving

You stuck a plaster and kiss
Upon my bleeding knee
And wiped my tears away
And gave me another cornetto
But now I'm still bleeding
And I have tears streaming down
My broken and crumpled face
How could you leave?
Why did you leave?
I love you...
In memory of my grandad who died of skin cancer in April 2014, barely a few days after his 75th birthday.
His last words: " hello poppet ".
All the things I mentioned are things we'd do together
Now I fly alone
Now I sail the seas alone
Middy May 2018
What are you looking at young child?
The two boys kissing over there?
It's fine. I promise. Love is love!
And the two girls holding hands?
That's ok too. Love is love after all.
No need to argue.
What are you looking at, kid?
The single dad with children of his own?
Smiling at their father as does other children?
He does his best, he works hard and never wants to let them down
He's a good dad in my opinion.
Yes, a very handsome one too.
What are you looking at?
The mother who tries to make her child smile?
Oh the child! I see he's wearing pink.
And is that eye shadow? Oh she did it well, his mum did.
Oh and her daughter! Oh she looks cute in blue jeans.
And I love that blue shirt on her.
Oh those two! The ones who like rock music
Wear leather jackets, spikes, tattoos, piercings and black
Yet they're the kindest couple on earth.
Is all this bothering you child?
You shouldn't need to worry. They're all good people, all very nice.
They're all human inside.
Give them a smile dear!
That's it.
THIS IS WHAT I WANT FOR THE FUTURE
PEOPLE DARING TO STAND OUT
Middy Dec 2017
It's getting louder
With all the talking
The murmuring
The staring
Too much, too much

I'm in a class room
Surrounded by a crowd
Of screaming, shouting
And endless chatter

Oh dear god
When will it end?
Everyone
Everything
Seems to be becoming
Quicker, quicker AND QUICKER

Oh no
No no no no
It's getting louder
Im screaming
Others are staring
I'm almost not there
But my screams and cries are

No one saw me
When I groaned quietly
No one saw me
When I covered my ears
No one saw me
When I started to cry
Now they see
As I run away screaming
Dear teachers,
You were given a job at a school
So control your class for god's sake
513 · Jan 2018
Birthdays
Middy Jan 2018
An unbirthday!
364 of them!
Make them happy days!
Even if it’s not the best day
And your birthday seems so far
And it seems that it’s the best
To be honest I see why
But everyday can be good
Ok I’ll say upon experience
That some will make you scream
And you want to wake up
Thinking it’s all just a dream
Some will make you shout
And no one knows what it’s about
That some will make you cry
Feel like you want to die
Like a flower withering away
BUT COME ON WAKE UP
let the flower rise and grow!
Be a garden! Be you!
Be strong! Be happy
Love others but please oh please don’t forget yourself
Care for others and yourself
Keep on going no matter what!
Oh and one final thing
Happy birthday
Or unbirthday of course

love from Middy xoxo
Even if it’s not your birthday, Make your day special!
501 · Oct 2017
A Rainy Day
Middy Oct 2017
It rained 14 days ago

It was spitting
As my brother would say
School is starting
And I already have a ****** nose

It rained 13 days ago
And I was unlucky
My father left home last night
And never returned again

It rained 12 days ago
It got a little worse
My mother's crying on the sofa
A glass of red liquid on the table

It rained 11 days ago
I'm being ambushed everyday
I'm covered in cuts every day
And I'm beaten black and blue

It rained 10 days ago
It was practally a storm
I could barely walk home
While teachers barely glanced

It rained 9 days ago
It wasn't so bad I guess
A boy went and said hi to me
I barely knew his name

It rained 8 days ago
I now know his name
I keep repeating it in whispers
Into the drizzling night

It rained 7 days ago
He stuck up for me
Why would he?
I'm a boy, a misfit here.

It rained 6 days ago
It was a huge downfall
I cried on this boy's shoulder
And he simply held me

It rained 5 days ago
My mother looks better
The boy came around
And he put a smile on my face

It rained 4 days ago
It got worse again
I'm scared and paranoid
I've got blood on my arms

It rained 3 days ago
He keeps making me crimson red
My cheeks flush when I see him
And I can't help but stare

It rained 2 days ago
I don't believe it
I made it out my closet
And out into the light

It rained yesterday
I can't hide it anymore
He knows and I don't know
What he is thinking now

It rained today
It was another drizzle
As we walked in the park

He kissed me.
A boy kissed another boy!
I kissed him.

We didn't care
About any looks or stares
But the rain hid my tears

He noticed them anyway
Wiped them away
And whispered
" I love you. "
As he kissed me again

The sun shone afterwards
Lightening up our faces
We walked hand in hand
Without another secret or word
I support LGBT and I love seeing people unafraid to express themselves
I hope one day we will grow up in a word with no homophobia or hate
477 · Nov 2017
The Stranger
Middy Nov 2017
you See Them everyday
but you
don't say
a woRd
just A hello
good morNinG
aftERnoon, evening
some have
hIdden knives
in pockets
some could be kind
some mAy
be drinking the
devil's drink
or sneaking looks
maybe
they don't
look
barely a GlancE
maybe
they can't see
you
or heaR
your
greeting or
farewelL
maybe they
are
artists, painters
a
predictor Or
an animal
a sad
sOul, a happy
spirit,
a serious soldier
a helper
a student, a
gunman
who will **** milliOns
bUT that
doesn't matter
you won't
see him or her again
S T R A N G E R
D A N G E R
L O O K
O U T
475 · Oct 2017
Numbers
Middy Oct 2017
I'm thinking of numbers
As I type with my fingers
Bruised and scarred
From writing so much
For nearly 7 hours of the day
I count my steps as I pace
My empty room
Tired and alone
My battery is draining slowly
From my division and subtracting
Which adds up to loneliness
Dread, anxiety and depression
It equals to suicide
Every 40 seconds of my life
As every 40 seconds
Someone is sent up high
To heaven or hell
Where they count good deeds
And sins like boys kissing boys
And girls loving girls
And teenagers are mothers
Without wanting to be
Where rounding up the number
Of terrorists and all evil
Leads to maybe trillions
Or billions but who knows?
There could be more
Corrupted and bad
466 · Jul 2018
Shut Down
Middy Jul 2018
It was a long day for me, for her
I helped her walk and told her how tired I was-
Yet she did not respond
For she was as tired as me.
And I controlled her Body
Every moment
Every movement
Every sound that echoed around me
Every sight she sees through her Eyes.

I carried her to bed, her Legs dragging her away
Her Hands ripped off the school uniform
And replaced it with a Nirvana shirt
And blue shorts

She threw her Body onto the bed and lay there,
Her Eyes watched the ceiling as if something was about to happen
Her Lips let out a sigh and she took her phone
And her Fingers and I got ready for what she was about to type today
463 · Oct 2017
Shocked, Stunned
Middy Oct 2017
I am shocked, shocked I tell you
Stunned is what I am!
I can't complete a sentence
Without a stutter or a stumble

My hand is shaking
There's tears in my eyes
I can't stop thinking in my mind

So many words are cluttered
In my brain
In my heart and soul

I want to let those words out
Cry them, scream them
But I can't
I can't without the hate
I can't do without the opposition
I can't without the homophobia
And the words I cannot repeat
To the ears of the youth

The result of that is sadness
Sadness for me
For my spirit and my sanity
They think I'm crazy
Nutty, mad, bananas
But I'm not alone

I'm sure others are mad
Maybe madder than me
Probably sipping tea
Coffee, water or milk
Maybe eating what I eat
Maybe saying what I say

I'm only able to express them
Explain them all here
No one hates
No one fights
No one laughs
No one taunts

We cry the same tears
We speak with the same voice
We have different opinions
And express them differently
But we have similar thoughts....

Oh!
There goes my wondering mind
Shocked again by what I thought
Stunned, yes that's what I am
I am just speechless from the amount how recognition I got in my last poem, what happens next
I'll be doing a little sequel to it becuase you all really love it
Thank you for all the comments
I love you all :)
Ps: This is not just a poem of how just recognition I got. This was my real reaction when I heard my grandfather died.
My mind wonders a lot like that
Just to distract myself from the loss of him
454 · Oct 2017
Cowards
Middy Oct 2017
There's a boy being beaten
By with nails and weapons
For no reason
He was only a little different
He was innocent
Yet what do people do about it?
Do they run to help and see what's wrong?

THEY HIDE!
THEY HIDE BEHIND TVS
THEY HIDE BEHIND RADIOS
THEY HIDE BEHIND CAMERAS
VIDEO TAPES AND PHONES
THEU JUST HIDE
AND DONT DO A THING

What about that girl in the video?
Telling stories on paper
With a marker as her voice
Her eyes of sadness
Hidden behind the frame
As she cries
And begs for help

She's dead now
Becuase no one told her
Things would be ok
No one stopped the torment
The embarrassment
The shame

Are you embarrassed now?
Good thing it reminds me of death
Because six million died

BUT NO ONE DID A THING
THEY COULD BE LIVING
THEY COULD BE HAPPY
BUT WE ALL HID
BEHIND RADIOS
AND NEWSPAPERS
AND NOBODY DARED
TO TAKE A STAND
AGAINST THE BULLY
THE MONSTER
THE MURDERER WHO DID THIS
I was extremely frustrated as you can tell.
The first bit about a boy is a real story  about an autistic boy was beaten up by bullies
I can't explain what happened as it's too graphic for me to say and it just breaks my heart. Another bit mentions Amanda Todd who commit suicide after being bullied online. Another mentions things  in World War II when people just hid behind TV screens and did nothing for 6 million Jews were killed in concentration camps by monsters  Who believed in  some stupid lies which causes millions of deaths. Deaths of children who don't even deserve it
I hope you will never go through something like this again
If the world for that matter
440 · Apr 2018
Not a Big Deal
Middy Apr 2018
Clinking cutlery and stomping feet
Shuffling of the seats
Laughs and cries of " I won, I won! "
Adults outside playing ping pong
There's music and dancing
Little girls prancing
Baby boys playing with their toys

Nothing unusual to them
The usual birthday party fun
But not for the girl in the corner
Crying on the floor
Her hands covering her ears
In a usual birthday party
Sorry for not being on for so long guys!
422 · Jun 2018
Processing
Middy Jun 2018
So I was having a-a-a
Thing where you...
Oh! A conversation! Yes!
So I was having a conversation.
With... Brown haired....
Ah yes my freind.
Well ex freind.
She saw me stuttering and buffering
Like an old computer
Tak1ng
1t2
T1m3
And
N01
Pr0ce221ng
1nf0mat10n
Clearly
So as the conversation went on
It was abandoned
As by the time I got my sentence right
The bell rang for class
And she vanished into a sea
Of people
Talking L O U D L Y
And I was lost in the crowd
But what do I expect
Since I get lost in my own conversations?
My life when I process information or try to make myself say something. I hate socialising for too long or my processing gets worse
Middy Oct 2017
I'm in a forest
A huge winding forest
One that twists your mind
One that makes you wonder
Where you must go
And I'm lost in this forest
This deep and lonely forest
Almost dark and lonely as me

I give up finding my way out
I pitch my tent
I gather wood and light a match

It's a simple spark
Barely lighting the dark
But it makes me warm inside
Soon I am surrounded by warmth
More warmth than before

The wolves howl along
To my silent songs and hums
Owls hoot and fireflies flicker
All dancing along to the tune
The flames are lighting up the dark
And so are the fireflies
I'm not so alone anymore

The man in the moon
He's such a pale white
He gives such a nice glow
The children, the stars
They seem to be dancing too
They seem to be giggling with me

I sleep the darkness away
Morning comes
And I'm ready to face a new day
I love the night and nature. It's always calmed me and it never makes me lonely.
410 · Oct 2017
Smart
Middy Oct 2017
This child
A school boy
Who can't stop
Moving and won't
Stop talking or saying
Stuff that's out of the topic
He will be a kind man who
Won't give up on his hopes
Or dreams he always has
He will often laugh and
Dance and moonwalk
Putting a smile on
Others' faces
But some will
Taunt him and
Cackle at his antics
Some will think he is
Mad, crazy or energetic
He will struggle through life
But he will climb mountains and
He will scream for millions to hear

......................He is smart....................
I'm writing in a few form today! Anyone like?
This was inspired after i met two people at a party a few days ago. One with ADHD and autism and the other with Aspergers. We both talked and it turns the man with ADHD was diagnosed only recently as an adult. They are both very kind people and the man with Aspergers is very clever and nice. Adding them here is a little way of saying a thanks for meeting them.
406 · Sep 2017
The Child
Middy Sep 2017
Mummy said bad things today
She screamed until she coughed and choked
I don't know why she does those things
And ignores her only child
Daddy hit me hard today
He send me stumbling to my bruised knees
I don't know why he does those things
And hurts his only child
Those kids hurt me at school and ripped my drawing of pain
Into tiny pieces
Why do they do those things
To a humble child?
The teacher never listen
They don't care if I'm dead or alive
I wonder how they'd feel
If their student shot themselves tonight?
If a child died they'd come running
But they'd never come running to me.
401 · Oct 2017
Rainbow Riot
Middy Oct 2017
A world of grey
Darkness and decay
War, horrific war and death
War against
Boys who like boys
Girls who like girls
People that don't mind
People that don't really care
A boy who feels like wearing pink
A girl desperate to wear blue

An explosion
An explosion of colours
Lights up the darkened streets
With flags of many colours
Rainbows
Blue, pink and purple
Yellow, pink and blue
Many shades of pink and purple
Shades of grey and purple
Pastel blue and pink and white

So many colours
So Blinding, so incredible
How many unite
To colour this grey world

Peace will be restored
Justice will restored
Love will be here
Forever underneath cracks of grey
Love is love
Never forget that
398 · Oct 2017
Look At My Eyes
Middy Oct 2017
I'm sitting in my usual corner
Of the coffee shop in town
The morning's come
The day has begun
So where's the singing birds?

It's a very quiet morning
Only three cars passed by
A black Nissan Pick Up truck
A siver Honda car
And a truck heading to the south
To give us our supplies
That the farmers and poor make
Just for us
But get no credit or coin

I'm looking around and I see
Five people in the room
Six if you count the homeless man
Staring through the window
A black Labrador next to him
He's staring at me

The man in the corner
Has several wrinkles
Maybe 50? 60? 70?
He's got very milky coffee
Next to the newspaper he has
He's looking at the crossword
And raging with silent curses
That he thinks no one can hear
But if you look in his eyes
You see the frustration in them

A female teenager
She's staring at me
What is she jealous of now?
I really don't know what.
She's just glancing
Staring and glancing
As she sips her vanilla mocha
With her long hot pink nails
And sighs with her ruby red lips
You see jealousy in her green eyes
So sharp and cat like
You can almost smell it

There's a woman in her thirties
She is still smoking and puffing
And putting her ashes in the tray
' another interaction with cancer '
I think as she stares into space
If you look into her chocolate eyes
The same colour as her tea
She's thinking very deeply
As I am right now

There's a man at the coffee bar
Whistling away
He's cleaning up the desk
Waiting for the next customer
Waiting for the new order
Then he will make their drink
Make a working man smile
And a tired mother laugh
But it's not helping the man
The homeless one outside
Yet when you look into his eyes
His bright hazel will show
Happiness and joy

There's a guy in the corner
Listening to some music
With his black coffee on
I sit with him
Even though he's misjudged
And he flashes me a smile
As his black and purple hair
Is tossed around by his hand

" you've been writing a lot, love "
He smiles as he stops his songs

" I know. " I reply.

I see him everyday
He's going through something
Sad and tough
And when you look at his eyes
A deep greyish blue
He's had enough of it

" are you sad? " I whisper
Looking at him
He turns away with tears
They're welling up in his eyes

" it's ok, " I smile
And pat his shaking shoulder
" you're never alone.
I'm your friend "

He looks at me in the eyes
My observant and gentle eyes
They show comfort when I see him
Smiling at long last

I soon have to go.
Places to be
Places to go

" see you tomorrow "
He smiles at me

" see you soon! "
I smile back at him

I make sure to get a take away
A plain coffee with a packet
Of sweet smelling sugar
I give it to the homeless man
You should've seen the
Joy and happiness in his eyes!
391 · Oct 2017
Codes
Middy Oct 2017
Everyone's talking in codes
In gabbled voices
In loud voices

What are they saying
When they say
A thing everyone laughs at
What do they call it?
A joke?
But...
I don't get it

Why do they waste words
On something they call banter
Code for hating, bullying
Rambling maybe
But it hurts none the less

I'm looking around
I can't understand a word
My ears are blocked
By my shaking hands

The jangling of a bracelet
The sound of music

What are these codes?
How do I speak like that?
How do I act like that?
The voices only give me
Questions and no answers
386 · Oct 2017
Simple Facts About Children
Middy Oct 2017
Men and women around the globe
Mothers, grandmothers and aunts
Fathers, grandfathers and uncles
All parents from all over the world
I have written this poem to state
Simple facts about children
That have been dismissed
With a wave of a hand
Or ignored with a turning of heads

Children sometimes need space
Don't tell them to socialise
All of the time
They need a break
Just to be on their own
They don't need to do things
All of the time
Sometimes they want to rest
Or to simply do nothing

Don't go at them about everything
Sometimes they can't help it
Things can be unpredictable
Like hurricanes or death
Help them when they need it
Not every time
They'll never know how to do it
All on their own otherwise

How do I know this?
I am a child
I was a child
I will always be a child
I know that you need space
That you need a break
That you need to have an escape
From the world sometimes
I feel this is often overlooked
As an autistic girl, I struggle with socialising but I don't mind it. BUT I come to a point where I need to have a break and just be on my own un my room to lie on my bed and sleep or just to do nothing.
Simple as that.
372 · Sep 2017
Was It Worth It?
Middy Sep 2017
I see him on the screen of the TV
As the bold headlines
Of the newspapers flash
"MAN CAUGHT AFTER ATTEMPTED ******
LAST FRIDAY NIGHT"
As a victim's heart took a final beat

The outraged look on the reporter
Says she's mad but she can't say
And the media is screaming
"HOW DARE HE?"
It was an innocent human after all
But was it worth it?

I'm flicking through the article
Says the murderer was imprisoned
Spending the rest of his life
Stuck behind bars in a prison yard

" he's probably regretting it. "
Says Mum, who's sipping her tea
" I wonder what he's thinking. "
Says Dad who's leaving for work
I knew what I was thinking
" was it really worth it? "

Right now he's receiving death
As his punishment
A little much to me
But I suppose he should know
What it's like to be a chalk outline.
He's probably got a rope as a tie
Maybe chair straps as bracelets
His bones turning electric
Maybe he's got a bullet in his brain
His blood on the ground
As the criminal's heart takes
One last beat

But was it worth it?
To commit a crime?
A crime he'd be punished for
Was he asking for suicide?
Or was he mad inside?
Guess that's for the media
to decide
Just a random fact: this is originally a song but I want it as a prom so yeah
370 · Oct 2017
Bullet In My Heart
Middy Oct 2017
he brought a gun to school
with the lesson in a form of a bullet
he is the one around that everyone fears
the one you must and shall obey
his knuckle duster harder
than the front of a car
his fingernails ******
with the blood of his victims

the teacher
the one who preaches in the lessons
who pays no attention to the cold words
the violence and the red stain in the hallways
the teacher
he said to us
about a new boy around
his face is darker than chocolate
and has a gleaming happy smile
but with feelings of nerve

he said to treat him well
to be good little boy
to tell him what good little students we are
to show him all the harsh rules

did we understand?
that was the question asked
what did we all answer at the end of the day?
yes sir!

but soon
his dark skin was bleeding
bruised and beaten
black and blue
his eyes had a blacker ring
his nerves were skyrocketting
his happy smile gone
in one single punch
one cruel word
that was all it took
now there is a hole
a bullet hole in his kind heart
can you find the bully's backstory? comment it down and i'll happily repost a random poem of yours. :)
i will reveil the winner at any time so search hard!
here's a clue: it causes bruises. many use it everyday. someone can be hurt by it. anytime, anywhere.
ps: im writing on school computers so sorry for any mistakes
356 · Oct 2017
The Strange Pyramids
Middy Oct 2017
Three pyramids
Three stars in the sky
Is that not strange?

What mysteries are
Hidden in the sands
By the ancient ones?

Who helped them up?
How did they go so high?
In the night time sky?

Did the River Nile
Guide them here safe and sound?
How did they float up?

So many questions
But the right time comes
They are unanswered
I wrote this after watching a documentary about the pyramids of Giza.
All of this is written in the Japanese style of writing. Known as Haiku.
345 · May 2018
Revolution No. 11
Middy May 2018
It's a sad old ****** Sunday
When men walk in suits,
With solemn faces in the cold wind
Tears flow down the elderly's wrinkled faces
And their hands shake
Women hold the hands
Of their whispering children
The long droning speeches are said
All is said and all is done
The poppies are placed
Everyone stands in silence
Then walks home in whispers
Paper poppies on their coats
Waking through
Freezing Autumn leaves
We walk inside our homes
We hear church bells chime
Like the ones at the funerals so long ago
We take off our coats
Leave them around
We lie in bed and sleep
We get up the next day
When all is said and done
And life goes on
Except not for the dead
And not for the ones
Who witnessed death
See this is what ****** me off about November 11th. It's a good idea except if you think about it, people just move on. By people, I mean people who will never get the picture of what it's like to see men dying around you, buried in snow and mud.
Also sorry for not being around, school has been awful recently. :(
340 · Oct 2017
What Happens Now
Middy Oct 2017
That was then
This is now
This is what is happening

You tried to hang yourself
With the rope from the attic
You left it behind
You're ever so brave
You went to school with a smile
And beat those bullies
With a help from bravery

You nearly shot yourself
With the gun from a cuboard
You and your brother have grown
You ratted on your father
But you were strong
You slayed him
With your hidden strength

You tried to stab yourself
With a stolen knife
You nearly took your life
You and your sister
You're both happy as can be
You shielded your sister
From your mother's hateful words
With a hint of kindness

You nearly jumped
Off of the bridge over the river
But you moved on
You carried on
With your family
With the help of happiness

You were almost hit
By an oncoming train
But you got through it
You left them
And came to your friends
With a feeling of justice

You are still young
But you're growing up
I have happy tears as I see
You saying thank you
When I simply said
What would happen next

What will happen after?
No clue
Don't worry though
You'll be fine!
Be yourself
Love yourself
You'll make it through life
No doubt
I don't know what will happen next in life
But stay strong
You can do it
Middy Sep 2017
In the church as the pastor starts to talk
About the good white angels from heaven  
that sent all evil black demons to hell
I don't know, I've thinking since then
About something that's been puzzling me
What a white Angel is bad?
What if a black demon is good?
What if the white Angel does bad?
What if the black demon repents?
Can you be black and white?
Or will you just be a shade of grey?
What would happen an angel loved a demon?
What if a demon loved an angel?
What if a demon saved a human life?
Would someone even care at all?
I am Britain. Therefore I say: Colour, Grey. Not: Color, Gray
Just to confirm. So don't correct me.
337 · Oct 2017
Corridor Chaos
Middy Oct 2017
The Bell’s ringing again
Another day of torture
Another walk of shame
And another crowd to follow

I’m standing in line
Everybody is laughing
Everybody is smiling
But I’m not
I’m covering my ears
I’m starting to cry
The words they say
Are echoing again
  It’s another long day

My classmates say
They understand my pain
That they’ll stay quiet for me
then why am I having a meltdown
In the middle of corridor chaos

My heart is pumping
I’m humming loudly
But nothing can block out the noise
I’m being pushed and shoved
In the long narrow room

I   C A N ‘ T  T A K E  IT

Stay SILENT For Me
What hidden meaning does it have?
Rearrange the letters in Silent
Here is my message
LISTEN to me
This is real stuff that often happens when I’m paranoid
Due to my autism,  I often struggle in corridors as I have a few sensory problems. Combined with the loud noise and I will just have a complete meltdown
333 · Dec 2017
Catapillar in it’s cocoon
Middy Dec 2017
My eyes are closed tight
I’m fast asleep
In my cocoon
Hidden away
I’m asleep and no one can hear me
I’m asleep and no one can see me
I’m in my cocoon
No one can find me

No one will gobble me up
Chew me up and spit me out
No one will yell
And hurt my aching ears
From morning to night
Until I awake
I’m in my cocoon
Hidden away
I love being asleep
Because no one can tell at me about anything
299 · Nov 2017
a web filled with lies
Middy Nov 2017
they lied to me
when they said
they'd be kind as princesses
and quiet as mice
but if it were true
why are my ears covered?
why am i crying?
why am i shaking like mad?
why am i running away,
escaping from everything?

why?
why do they do this?
my hands are still shaking
as i write on this tear stained page

my head is resting
(but not in peace)
on top of my aching arms
my eyes are shut tight
not opening or seeing

am i awake?
am i asleep?
am i alive or dead?

no one knows
not even i
who would care about me anyway
i wote this after a breakdown i had about my noise. i also am stressed due to issues at home. sorry for not writing guys
293 · Oct 2017
Dream Chaser
Middy Oct 2017
At night I chase dreams
As I'm curled up in bed
My arms are illustrated
With the stories of my life

My friends are always there
My family is very blurry
But the people who I love
Are crystal clear
And I know they care

I'm running across the desert
With a sandstorm chasing me
While I run after my dream
It's almost out of reach
I'm running on grasslands
Over mountains and hills
Lush fields of flowers and green
Through the rainy stormy weather
Past the sunshine and summer
Thought the snow and the winter

I won't stop chasing my dreams
They won't stop running away
But I will catch them some day
Even if no one believes I can
You can do it
You can catch your dreams
289 · Sep 2017
Diamond Glare
Middy Sep 2017
She's got diamonds dripping from her neck
and around her skinny wrist
And many other places that Would take years to list
From her eyes when nothing is alright for her
When nothing is perfect or clean
She has pretty little diamond on her ears too
And hanging around her long blonde hair
Her face is a diamond glare
When she sees the ones she hates
The victims who did nothing
But have none of her diamonds
Some of them are jealous and wanting a few
But she just snaps their hearts in two
And leaves them there on the floor
Her body dressed in diamonds
Her shoes are twinkling with them too
And no one ever looks at her
When they see her diamond glare
Middy Oct 2017
Men in black guarded the gates
Leading to where they call hell
A large building with corridors
Rooms that waste hours of time
The men shut the black gates
From behind my shaking back
I start my day's sentence

I'm in the winding corridors
Hearing a young girl cry far away
Another few words of hate
Tossed at her pretty face as usual
Yet the headmaster doesn't care

A boy is walking nearby me
He has a black eye and a nose
Streaming a waterfall of blood
His body littered with bruises
Another one suffering from abuse
From fellow prison immates
And his own kindly parents
Yet the teachers don't care
What kind of educators are they?

We learn things we already knew
Is brainwashed into forgetting
Our fractions and subtracting
Turning into loneliness and dread
And adding our depression levels
Dividing our energy down
And multiplying our confusion

Panic attacks our brains and
We don't know what's coming
A test by writing a story
An essay or even a ramble
Or knowing scientific facts
That we probably won't need
Apart from if you like science

I stare out the window
Dreaming of a classroom
Filled with freedom and love
Songs and poetry and dancing
Playing with words
Not planning a story before
We touch the ****** pen

But now we are birds in cages
Ready to sing our song
As the old writer in his chair says

“ how can a bird born for joy
Sit in a cage and sing? ”

But what is the answer?
No one knows
I like my education
Bit seriously school feels like a prison to me.
280 · Dec 2017
Rat
Middy Dec 2017
Rat
It’s chewing my insides
It’s gobbling me up
I feel so awful
Sick and disgusting

I carry death
I chew down my enemies
I sink ships with a nibble
And I go down with it

My guts are churning
I feel so bad
My heart feels rotten
Like that Apple over there
God I feel worse
Watch out all of you mindless people
I feel so sick
People really do underestimate rats
They are Small but they care for family
They are small but they can **** millions
279 · Oct 2017
A City In Fog
Middy Oct 2017
There's a city of lavender
Beyond the fields of green
Turning grey with the sky
There's fog
Purple smoke
Everywhere
It surrounds the tall buildings
Hidden in the stormy clouds
Electrifying the sky
Brightening the darkness
A bittersweet drop of rain
Starts to fall
And thousand more droplets
Create tear puddles on the ground
For the children in red wellingtons
To dance around and splash
And for the depressed and alone
To hide their salty tears
278 · Sep 2017
Snap Snap
Middy Sep 2017
I'm running through a forest
Being chased down by guns
The owners of these weapons
I can't be caught be them now
In the grasp of death
Left for my blood to soak the floor

Words cannot hurt can they?
Then why do they feel like rocks
Shattering the silenced glass
Or a gunshot in the air
And a bullet through my heart.

I'm still running
Snap snap
The branches snapped beneath me
Snap snap, snap snap
They're getting further away

The gunshot is sounded
I fall to the ground
And roll under a bush
Hidden from the world
My only space of peace
Invaded by war
277 · May 2018
99% Weird
Middy May 2018
I’m 99% weird, I’m sure of it
That 1% tells me to act normal
But I don’t think I hear it often
Sometimes when I sleep
It does request so
But it’s just 1%
It’s not like 99% is normal anyway
Yes, the idea was to make it seem a little confusing :P
273 · Oct 2017
Riots For Freedom
Middy Oct 2017
We want freedom don't we?
It's hard to find
Like diamonds in dirt
But there's ways to get it
Here are a few that some do

For freedom
For freedom you must ******
The politions and the police
You must **** presidents
And innocent people
Who have nothing to do
With your maddening antics

For freedom
You must throw sticks and stones
Knife them with spiteful words
Shoot them with hate

For freedom
You must throw bombs
Explosions of anger will erupt
Sadness will come
Tears of pain will fall

Children will cry
Babies will die
Mothers will sob
Father will be shocked
The world will be stunned
Celebrities will be stalked
Possibly slaughtered

Nails will be everywhere
Rumble will crumble
Into tiny breadcrumbs
Homes will be gone
The homeless will live
On dark gloomy streets

Money will be used
On weapons of wrath and war
Leaving the wealthy with nothing
And they will be naked in alleys
In poverty and hopelessness  

Human lives will be wasted
But that won't matter will it?
Why do people do these things? It upsets me and honestly makes me a cry. Such a waste of human life
272 · Oct 2017
Criticism
Middy Oct 2017
" why do you wear all those badges? "
My brother frowns at me.
" they'll take away all the colour on your hoodie. "

" I like them. " I reply bluntly.

' BUT THEY ARE COLOURFUL! AND I LOVE THEM! '
I want to yell.
But I hide my rage with a sigh

" you really should join the play!
You'd be amazing! "
My mother says.

" b-but I don't want to..."
I mumble and look down

" but you should! What about the plays you did as a child? "
My mother glares.

' BECAUSE OF ALL THE PEOPLE
ALL THE LINES
I CAN'T DO IT
I DON'T WANT TO BE THERE! '
I want to yell.
But I hide my rage with a shrug.

" you look like a *****. "
My father glares at my blue clothes
" you look like a mess. "

' I'M SORRY
BUT I CAN'T SEE IN THE DARK
YOU NEVER GAVE A BULB '
I want to glare.
But I hide my rage with silence.

" brush your hair! "

' I ALREADY HAVE! '

" clean your teeth! "

' I'VE DONE SO ! '

" have your hair loose! "

' I LIKE IT THAT WAY! '

" do that, do this! "

" your grades are failing! "

" get your act together! "

Can't they see they are the cause?
Can't they I'm sad.
I'm crying in my room.
I write sad songs and poems
In my room alone.
Alone.
Without them.
Without criticism.

I want to scream.
Shout or yell at them.
They always moan at me.
Only my friends understand
Like good friends do.
They don't.
I want to let out everything
Tell them how insecure I feel.

But I hide my rage
My sadness
My hatred for pity
My feeling of being an outcast
I hide it all with a fake smile.
This is criticism I get all the time
I don't help out at plays because I'm too shy.  My hair is wild so I can't brush It
My teeth are crooked so they always look like that
Please parents
Stop making me so insecure
271 · Oct 2017
Home Alone
Middy Oct 2017
" hello? "

I ask as I open the black door.

Silence greets me kindly
Letting me in so gentlemanly.

School bag off.
Get a snack.
School back on.

I march the stairs
Sounding like an xylophone
Creaking away as I charge
I reach the top.
My bedroom door is shut
Locking my art and poems away
Never to be heard or seen
By family or friends
But strangers on the media

I open the door.
My sofa has a blanket of clothes
My floor covered with magazines
To be destroyed and cut up
Into a more stranger yet beautiful
Type of art, a collage of photos
Of famous people and models
Taken by famous photographers
Who's names are unknown to me.
Maybe I'll join the list someday
But who knows?

I slip off my socks and shoes
Rip off my prison uniform
Sorry, meant school
But it's a prison to me in my mind

I armour myself with band shirts
A pair of tie-dye shorts
And I'm barefoot
So I feel like I'm walking on grass

I take my snack, a scone
A cup of tea
A packet of crisps*
And settle down onto my bed

My bed isn't like your bed
It's a bunk bed
No one sleeps on top
My brother used to
But he left me be
And I use its banister
As a railing for my own curtain
To hide my own bed
Hide away my emotions
Hide me and cover me
As I sleep

Silence greets me again
It rests upon me as I start to write
My poems and stories

No one to bother me
No one to hurt me
No one to pressure me
No one to get me down

The only sound is
My grandmother's TV
Did I mention she lives with me?
Don't worry, she loves me
She wouldn't tell a secret
Like I don't tell hers

The sound of my breathing
The sounds from my phone
Blasting music through my room
The sounds of the wind
A nearby train
Cars passing by

The peace is shattered
So I wave it goodbye
The front door cracks open

" hello? "

My mother calls.

" are you ok? "

" I'm fine! "

I reply with a fake smile
Even though she can't see
My frown of disappointment

I needed to be alone more
*For Americans I believe the term is 'Chips'. But that's what we call them in Britain
Sorry!
271 · Sep 2017
Browsing
Middy Sep 2017
I get up in the morning
The weekend has finally come
If it's called the weekend
When the weekend in the beginning of the week
Then why don't we call it 'week beginning'?

While I ponder this in my mind
I laugh and chatter using texting
How? By going on my phone
Obviously after having breakfast

"I gtg guys, gonna do some browsing" I text then go online
To check the news
And see what's happened
While I was gone

"ENGLAND IS MY CITY"
One post reads
"No it's a country :/"
I respond with a face not really
Describing my confusion

"Why can't I sleep?"
Someone asks from another timezone
"Becuase you're on this website
That ruins sleep"
"Actually it's because of the light
From your shining device.
That causes your lack of sleep."
I explain
"LOL I was just joking!"
The person responds with a laughing face
'How on earth is that a joke?'
My mind makes me ponder

The usual hate, questions, laughing, the lot
Until I log off and take a walk
To clear away the web of confusion
I know so very well.
Seriously as an autistic person, I just don't understand why people say this stuff
This is normally my average conversations on the Internet. Needless to say, many people concern me.
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