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in your sights i felt thunder,
glamorous, humbling, coloring me.
the cadence of your feet, upon icy sheets,
up was a flanking stare, sundering me.
upon winter flowers, a warm blanket, at the apogee,
bundling, a sparkling picnic with kindling.
hungry and spent, still leveling, revelrous,
disguised instincts as misgivings, querulous.
dalliance abiding, an abode-esque semblance,
and many silly kitchen grown sentences.
buttered up, rapt and clasped in exchange of gaze,
laconic at most in lieu of pleading.
twain unsure of meaning,
twain apologetic,
for teasing in lieu of stealing.
prohibited mission,
reciprocation solicitation.
when left bereft, left shaken.
perhaps cages were staged,
built beside mistakes,
forgiven if forsaken.
one of these days, then.
am,gl;am la
My sweet little mollusk,
You polish the sea-tangy sand dollars smooth with the soles of your feet
You fill up your sweet siren lungs with a sun-sated breeze and submerge your bare fingers
Until they can sweep the slippery silt of the seabed abyss. I can’t sleep.
Your anemone fingers trace watery ripples through the ebbs of my dreams, trailing streams
Of fluorescent-blue algae sunk deep.  Your barnacle tongue shatters ships
Into ruinous splinters of treasure. I kiss
The cerulean ocean that hides in your lips.

My sweet little scallop,
The galloping waves break the curves of your shallows.
There are flecks of unpressed sea salt brine in your irises, tireless riptides of foaming-bright promises.
Your skin has the silvery sparkle of scales that effervesce endlessly, bending beneath the fierce tides of your palmprints.
I’m dropping. The current caresses your cheeks’ fishbone hollows, rethreading the necklaces strung out of seashells.
You bury your face in the swells of the tempest. I envy
Your azure, I worship your lapis.

My sweet little mussel,
Your tussled cyan-coral hair is unbleached, unleeched and resplendent
I am rendered transcendent by the green iridescence of your silk seaweed whispers. I have drowned in your splendid.
I can still hear your aquamarine through the white roaring waves cracking onto the shore.
I want more. Your crustaceous sand whirlpool has nestled below the soft curl of your chest. You press the world’s oceans in the dip of your palms
And drink deep from the waves swirling under.
I’ve drowned in the water-spilled seas that are cupped in your hands,
I have drowned in the pearls of your wonder.
 Jul 2019 Emmennarr
I took a moment of fancy to you,
And pray why did I do so?
Was it the curl of your lip,
Or the drawl in your tone
Or just the way your eyes
Met and held mine across the room.

You moved away and around
And so did I,
Heightened senses,
Aware and on the prowl.

A game that’s played on
Almost forever,
A lilt in my voice
A bounce in my step,
An interesting interlude,
For a moment or two.

You waltzed across the room,
Meeting many,
Caught you from the corner of my eye,
Seeking me.

The moment of reckoning,
When we were just a breath away,
I smiled and lowered my lashes,
A deep breath, and walked away,
Is it you or is it me?

Oops! I smell coffee,
Good morning love,
had an interesting interlude,
Guess what! It was you!
upon becoming a nestling sans nest,
i decided to make a half-baked plan of mandates,
stating how i ought to quest, trough to crest.
egesting the presently unpleasant facets,
i adopted a policy of empirical puerilism.
now a newly groovy pluvi-dendrophile philomath,
a counterbalanced feng shui caricature,
promptly finding rapture bereft of culture.
plundering the dysfunctional,
worshiping the digressive.
anything is adjustable,
everything can be lovable.
finding bravery in regret,
forever simply vincible.
basking in the ebullience,
bringing passion with my presence.
learning to rhapsodize my sentience,
projecting admittedly confusing ontologisms,
concerned with not much else than pleasance.
my means of conception have become my heaven,
and with no evidence of the clandestine,
i simply stepped in.
strategically puerile, forever.
If I could turn back time
I would hit Backspace all day,
Id put on Caps Lock
and SHOUT what I say.

I'd use the whole Alphabet
To tell you hello,
Press seven Numbers
Til you picked up the phone.

I'd Tab through the comments
I didn't want to hear,
And use the Arrow Keys
To drag your body near.

I would Delete the harsh words
I didn't mean to speak,
And Insert the "I love yous"
I before couldn't leak.

I would use Ctrl to
Keep reigns over my heart,
And I would Escape lies
That tore us apart.

I'd Print out your photo
And kiss it goodnight,
Use the Calculator
To check that we were right.

I'd Paint you a picture
of us, you and me,
Then I'd hit Enter
Just so you would see.

Those are the things
I would do in my strife,
If only Backspace
worked in real life.
This is the first poem (that I have a copy of) i wrote that I actually thought was good. I was in seventh grade, twelve years old, and I wrote it for a newspaper competition. I knew it was really great but I didn't think I would beat all other applicants in the state in my age group. So you can imagine my surprise I'm sure when I DID win! That is the first time I was proud of my writing. So this one has a lot of special sentimental value. Thanks for reading.
do you remember when you lost it?
when you would take me hostage?
when you turned caustic?
you used my presence as your very own mental whetstone.
you called yourself psychotic,
called our words cautious, hypnotic,
but they were toxic.
they were exhaustive.
talks of the atlantic,
and how i'd cross it.
"don't worry, my flight stops in austin,
and then again in boston, i promise.
honest, i'll even book in august."
but then we tossed it,
there was a line,
and you crossed it.
sometimes you got so reckless, so hostile,
that i felt like your chaperone.
we both had to learn how to grow,
living in time zones of our own.
the air turned cold,
when we let our emotions show.
but i was lonely too,
so at least you weren't alone.
you acted as my bright summer sun,
setting my world aglow.
but every time you said hello,
i remembered how much i missed the snow.
an accidental double overdose of smoldering shoulders left me with none cold enough to hold my golden burdens.
tastes; exotic.
brain; neurotic.
mind; chaotic.
gods; agnostic,
friends; narcotics.
hope; quixotic.
love; psychotic.
(when two insane people have a close relationship interesting things happen.)
(this one is for h-bomb, and broken fishbowls.)
You drive me to insanity
Not the good kind
The kind that runs through your veins
Until all that's left are the scrappy remains
Of what once were rational thoughts
You've committed a horrid crime of theft
Now there's nothing left
But scrappy remains
And insanity Running through my veins.
Let's get a little bit tipsy and dance under the stars on a sandy beach,
splash in its chaotic waves.
let's skinny dip under the moon,
bath in the clear fresh water that falls off a beautiful jagged mountain.
Let's jump off that same mountain and feel our hearts catch in our throats and our souls get shocked  back to life.
Lets set ourselves free
Let us simply exist.
Let us just be.
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