and in all of sudden
it starts to burn
the flames inside
once again returns
i can breathe
i just scream
cry and shout
my tears stream
my body’s wild;
i can’t control it
i just hope
that no one notice
the marks on my arms
and the tears in my eyes
as cold and sad
as winter skies

and it works for a while
the fire’s gone
i’ll get trough the day
i’m moving on
but i’m feeling so empty
i guess that’s better
than feeling the fire
burn forever

so it happens. people die. some too early, some too late. does it even matter when?
life’s full of ups and downs. i didn’t get to experience the best things in life. to get a child. to love someone so deeply, that you know it’s him you want to spend the rest of your life with.
but not the worst either. to loose someone close to you. to get hurt deeply in your heart.
so it’s actually okay. life's the best, but also the worst. **i loved it.

new shoes and late night blues
drinking ***** listening to views
getting 'dude' as a tattoo
i'm never getting over u

middle of may and it's all the same
life's a game that i can't play
i'm runnin' late at airport gates
i never thought i'd miss my plane

new shoes and late night blues
drinking ***** listenin' to views
getting 'dude' as a tattoo
i'm never getting over u

middle of may and it's all the same
life's a game that i can't play
im runnin' late at airport gates
i never thought i'd miss my plane

cigarettes and a hypocrite
white outfits that i regret
singing this to my little sis
won’t remember but can’t forget

warm beers and sudden tears
faced my fear after all these years
belvedere under a chandelier
as cold and sad as the atmosphere

blue lights on spotify
goodbyes and on my mind
getting high sippin' on wine
thinking ‘bout some stupid guy

the world is so silent
but in the same time it screams
i was holding on to you
we're you holding on to me?

is it my fault or what?
tears don't fall without gravity
but the sun will rise again
for you
and for me

oh river take me far
i'm as pure as you are
and once the trees have cleansed my soul
i'll turn your crooked teeth
intil gold

i can write poems and songs
know what’s right and what’s wrong
i can sing my heart out
without feeling any doubt

but i can’t control my mind
i’m not always that kind
at night i cannot sleep
but i've got what i need

cold sweat
cigarettes
i’ll never forget
the day we first met

as the sun set
i kinda regret
that i didn’t get
to go to lafayette

sunlight
in your broken eyes
midnights
counting stars
on a clear sky

bad guys
waiting on the
other side
love advice
after these long
fights

lullabies
wanna hear you sing
tonight
quiet why’s
just say
goodbye

*me singing the song badly lol: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F7d75qDcGIM

it's like i'm swimming from coast to coast
but still i'm drowning everyday
by body is an unwanted host
that dosen't listen when i pray

it's like my soul is so tired
that it wants to exhaust
i'm mad and uninspired
i'm lost

our souls will conquer
the fear
‘cause love is stronger
than tears
and i know you’ll
be here
‘cause i am no fool
my dear*

<3

church sunday morning
i met a guy like him
i said that he was beautiful
he told me to go to hell

and i sat down on my seat
a hundred hymns in my hand
oh i thought he was a god
but he was dying like a man

and the priest blessed us all
but i don’t need to be blessed
if only he was there
i wouldn’t be so obsessed

and we sung for the lord
our words turned into gold
religion is a masterpiece
it saves our souls

and when the ritual was done
i quitely went home
to talk about faith and belief
to him i worship the most

and on the way home to him
i couldn’t wait to arrive
and i prayed to god for him to still
be alive

but when i saw him laying there
bleeding on the floor
i just knew that god was dead
it didn’t matter anymore

midnight thoughts and wasted eyes
waiting for the sun to rise
owls are howling, so depressed
the morning light will be our guest

dosen’t matter if we’re drunk or sober
wasted nights in late october
leaves are floating down to earth
feeling like we’re nothing worth

i'm in love with a ghost
and you're in love with me
two pretended souls
kiss me till i bleed

you strangle me at night
ripping every piece
loving you is a fight
dying in the sheets

one more cigarette
dosen’t matter if i die
though i’m still feeling sad
when i’m f'cking high
and there’s no motivation
in our f'cked up minds
we wanna live
not just survive

the city lights won't chase us
but the morning sun will hate us
scream and shout till' your lungs turn dry
laughter in your perfect eyes

driving on a road to nowhere
no one thinks we really care
your heavy breath fills the air
my fingers slowly touch your hair

your lips so soft and eyes so green
your smile is reeler than i've ever seen
band t-shirts and skinny jeans
we feel so old but we're just sixteen

it's dark outside but there's hope in our hearts
the silent rain is a work of art
midnight sky's full of moonlight and stars
we keep on dreaming 'cause the night is ours

I wake up. Quiet. The sheets beside me are cold. The sun shines trough the dewy windows. I look down at my brown knees. The nail polish on my toes is falling off. I close my eyes for a second and open them again. I leave my bed and look myself in the mirror. My eyes are as blue as the ocean, and I’ve got freckles on my nose. My lips are dry, so I wet them with my tongue. I can feel the warmth from the sun on my thighs. It’s silent.
     My mother enters the room.
     “Who?” she asks.
     “I don’t know” I answer. She leaves.
     I look at myself in the mirror again. I look pretty, with my tan skin as a contrast to my blue eyes. An eyelash has fallen off and landed on my cheek, but I don’t remove it. I look away, at the sun. It shines again today. I miss the ocean.

you’re a poem to me
and i love my poetry
when i fly
or wants to die
it’s the only thing
that keeps me alive

it’s raining. when the drops hit the roof, a harmonic sound is made. a melody. it’s a whole new genre of music by itself. so peaceful.
and even though people are bouncing and sulking, and completely soaked by the tears of the sky, it does not change the fact, that it’s raining.
i think the world needed that.

wash your hands
‘cause you’ve been unclean
doing things
that shouldn’t have been seen

clear your mind
‘cause you’ve been unkind
now you can’t lie
it’ll keep you up at night

up high our bodies breathe
when we’ve found what we seek
at night our minds will speak
what to lose and what to keep

some say we’re dumb and weak
but we know we should sleep
we feel young and free
it don’t matter when they preach

stay youth stay
please don’t let go
we'll try to behave
but there’s so much we don’t know

go go away
we need to be alone
no, we can’t be saved
someday we’ll grow old

why do i like the pain
it's all the same
repeating nights
repeating days
repeating kisses
and repeating shame
feel no ways
***** bottles and a song by drake