Memories of orange afternoon sun
Burning gold rays into mist
Such a sight of beauty beheld
Guns and bombs are hardly missed

There is such a gas that burns the lungs
My ears heard months before
But my body believed not in such hate
Before the burns of war

The roar of engines soared from above
A cry of warning before the storm
I had hardly a moment to breathe
The walls of my trench move, deform

Never before has my imagination torn
The edges of evils like these
And never before could I imagine death
Be carried on such a breeze

The moment I saw the hazy air
I jumped to my feet in shock
And out I surged from my home of mud
Choking, I could not walk

A man knows not panic
Until he cannot breathe
As a man cannot know war
Until bullets he lays underneath

To this day I remain unsure
If it was tears of poison or pain I wept
But I laid and watched my men retreat
In the moments before I slept

Memories of orange afternoon sun
Burning gold rays into mist
Such a sight of beauty beheld
Guns and bombs are hardly missed

"Your eyes look empty"
I thought to myself

I know the look well
I've worn it myself

Ambien is a drug
A pill which makes you sleep
And all I can say
Is that it's very reassuring
That I will sleep tonight
Even if it means
That I cannot dream
Because who needs night dreams
When you have day thoughts
Like mine

Some days
I am the cactus
On the windowsill
Sitting stiff
Ready for a fight
But all that I really want
Is some sunshine
And a friend
To share my day with

It's hard to write poetry
When your mind stops
Tracing the words
Of your day dreams
And your heart starts
Pumping the emotion
Of night thoughts

Promise me
That you will not
Make empty promises
Promises
Without meaning
Or sincerity
Because
I don't know
If I can handle
Another
Broken heart

The butterflies dance in my thoughts
Braiding my mysteries along
With the frost in the air
Hoping that you might be just fine

My chest is a cage
Constricting
Concealing
Holding back
And keeping away
A place where I hide
From my deepest of fears
But this prison
Is where my fears are held
Tucked away
In a
Not-so-safe hiding place
Because it is all too easy
For me to reach inside
And ponder them
Until they
Grow
Expand
Metastasize
To the point where they consume
My chest
My shoulders
My arms
My fingers
Through my legs
Into my toes
Until these fears finally fall
Down
Down
Down
Into the pit of my stomach
Where they stay
Until in the dark of the morning
When I can finally throw them out
Through way of mouth
In fits of
Coughs
and
Words
Of the unflowered kind
Because what I am spitting out
Is of the unflowered kind
And yet there are survivors
Who dangle
And play
Amongst my heartstrings
And the air in my chest
Until another
Bad Day
When they can consume my head
And constrict my chest
With the overbearing weight
Of
Everything

Fingers dance
And crickets hum
Stars twinkle bright
As thumbs strum along
You sit with me
And we sing a song
Summer at last
Has finally come

I wanted to write a poem
But sat outside and watched
The leafs grow
And the children swing
And the flowers dance
Instead

I wanted to write a poem
But read a book
And thought about adventures
And hoped for one myself
Instead

I wanted to write a poem
But called up a friend
And told a joke
And made them laugh aloud
Instead

I wanted to write a poem
But listened to music
And the sound of your voice
And the house settling at night
Instead

I wanted to write a poem
But always find myself
Doing other things
Instead

But if you think about it
It's kind of like writing a poem
Anyways

I am so desperate for change
That sometimes
I catch my unsatisfied fingers
Playing in my pockets
In hope to find something
Something
And scraping the limits of the fabric
Only to find
Crumpled receipts
And old pieces of lint

What if stars were candle lights
Burning away
The flame so bright

What if love was post-it notes
Left scattered about
Quick thoughts of hope

What if dreams were floating clouds
Changing shape
Pure and proud

What if thoughts were old snail letters
Happy moments
Of cards and cursive letters

What if rain drops were butterflies
Falling gently
Wearing dresses and ties

What if Mondays were a lively ball
Flowing long dresses
With men standing tall

What if the wind were a music box
Whispering songs
Without any talk

But what if stars were candle lights
Burning away
Their flames so bright

"Where have the stars all gone?"
She asked the sky.
"They've all flickered out."
He replied with a sigh.

I miss you old friend
Where have you gone?
The sun has come out
And brought the breeze with it along
I giggle in my yellow dress
The bugs tickle on my skin
It's time to play outside
With our trees and river again
We can go sit on the steps
Or play pirates on the swing
Pick flowers in the garden
At least the flowers left by spring
And if it starts to rain
I will laugh at your wet hair
You'll laugh at the mud on my face
And I'll laugh too, I just don't care
Because we are best friends
Who play with the sun
And at night we talk to the moon
With him we become one
But now summer begins
And I turn with a frown
Because your tan fingers
Are nowhere to be found
And I can't help but wonder
As the chrysanthemums yawn
Where my freckled summer friend
Could possibly have gone

Lay out a quilt
Spread it with love
Then lay down beside me
To ponder the mysteries above

The stars in the sky
The dreams that don't quit
The fantasies that fly
The worlds that split

We watch an infinity
Unravel from the ground
As we fill our minds
And our hearts with sound

We whisper our knowledge
Of those stars way out there
And when we run out of knowledge
We don't seem to care

We start making things up
Stories from sleepy heads
As we drown in this abyss
Of thoughts never said

And we reach out with our fingers
With a desire to tickle
The stars falling around us
Leaving a tingle and prickle

As we watch the adventures
Swim in the galaxies above
We somehow miss
The adventure of love

For there is so much adventure
And many places so new
Locked away in our hearts
If only we knew

And I looked at you
Desiring those stars
Completely unaware
Of the galaxy in my heart

A butterfly
The ballerina danced
Amidst the forest of people
Who swayed back and forth
In laughter and awe
As she flapped her wings
And flew towards the sky
For she had her heart set
On the moon
She flew so far
She no longer heard
The praises of her success
Forever lost
In the echoes of trees

There is a fire in me
It burns in my soul
It gives me passion and energy
And a drive to go
Inside of my lungs
It crackles and burns
It ignites my mind
As my stomach turns and turns
It heats up my head
So I cry out hot tears
To cool down I breath in
But I breath out my fears
It is growing, I feel it
It spreads through my chest
It laughs and dances
Wishing never to rest
So I'll drink some iced water
And lie down for a while
In the case that my fire
Might burn love for miles

Weak before,
I stood naked, shaking
Before you
But now I say NO

NO
To your lies

NO
To their eyes

NO
To the people
Who say the bullet should fly

NO
To hate

NO
To my weight

NO
To the anger
Which lies behind this gate

NO
To the dread

NO
I'm not mislead

NO
To the voices
Inside of my head

Because I am tired
Of your ****
And being told
Just how to be
And so I shout NO
With my fist in the air
Because no longer,
I just don't care
Because I'm going to be me now
And I'll leave you all just standing
Alone with your
Thoughts in your
Hands
Unbelieving

"Some days are better than others"
Is what I tell myself
Or, that's the story I use
'Till I can put it
Back on the shelf

And it came clear to me
As I watched the windows this day
That these winter skies
Are here to stay

A new years kiss
Is cheesy, it's true
But I must admit
I'm glad it was you

You were lost
In darkness and drugs
When we became friends
And you learned I don't judge
Now you call me your angel
A light in the dark
Because while we were friends
I rescued your heart

But that was just a coincidence

When you and I grew apart
Friend of fourteen years
We still were friends
But we knew not our fears
But when I got myself in trouble
With boys and love and kissing
You told me to slow down
Because there was a lot I was missing
Our friendship had dissolved
And almost gone away
And I was attempting to fill your space
But now you meet me halfway

But that was just a coincidence

I was sitting on my bed
Entranced in my book
When I picked up my phone
And gave it a look
So I texted you up
To make sure you were okay
But you said you were cutting
And wanted to die where you lay
I came over that night
To lay by your side
"Please don't be alone"
I wanted to cry

But that was just a coincidence

Except,
I don't believe in coincidences anymore

There once was a prince
On a planet far away
A prince who liked to think
Of flying far away
He liked very much
To think of places so new
Of places with color
Like red, purple, or blue
Worlds with emotions
And rolling hills that sang
Stars who laughed
Or cried where they hang
Where ballerinas clapped
As the mundane people danced
Where enemies were friends
And lovers entranced
There only would be happy thoughts
And even Kings were never mad
Where at night there were celebrations
For the moon not being sad
And the prince just sat
On his planet alone
Thinking up worlds
He would never come to know
For the prince only sat
And he would only think
And never leave his planet
Except for when he blinked

I am in love
But also at a fault
For I want to write poetry
But seem I can not

When you are in love
With a boy, the sky,
Or typewriters
You should write poetry
About eyes, clouds,
Or late-night novel writers

So what do I do
When I can't do what I do?
I write, silly,
A poem about you

Sometimes tears are beautiful
As they wave hello
To a smile
As they trickle down
Your cheeks

But sometimes tears are ugly
As they sneer
At the blood
That trickles down
Your arms

Hey there cutie,
I think that I
Kinda
Sorta
Maybe
Like you a lot
And I
Kinda
Sorta
Maybe
Wanna kiss you

A lot

Kinda
Sorta
Maybe

"What are you thinking about?"
You whispered in my ear
As I stared at the
White clouds in the
******* sky speckled with
Splashes of white dots
And curly X's

"Clouds, Stars, and Falling"
I replied with a sigh

I try to concentrate on my books and studies,
I try to laugh with my friends and buddies
I try to read and watch movies with tears,
I try so hard to get through the years
But for one reason, or another I once knew,
My thoughts always catch me thinking of you

I once checked out
Of the loony bin
But now here I go
Checking back in

And then she realized
With a sudden burst of longing
That she only wanted to be
Somebody's girl

What if angels walked on clouds
They skipped and hopped and
Laughed out loud



What if those angels sang us songs
Whispers of wind and
Rhymes of wrongs

What if those angels looked above
And saw not clouds
Buts mountains and doves

What if those angels fell to the ground
Lost their wings and
In humanity drowned

What if those angels walk with you now
Holding your heart and
Your hand with a vow

What if those angels never did know
Of the hurt and the troubles
In the oceans below

What if those angels forgot to look
For you're slowly dying
Immersed in a book

What if those angels no longer care
For they no longer watch
You bleed and swear



What if angels walked on clouds
They sit and think
Their thoughts too loud

I wanted to write a poem for you
But all that I made was a doodley-doo
I wanted to make it so perfect for two
I suppose this rhyme will have to do

A man is a Good Man
Because he has himself some rules
Rules to follow
Rules to watch
He has so many rules

I have rules for myself
Rules for love and war
I keep them close
I keep them safe
Locked behind a door

But now of recent
I have my worries
For I watch them
But ignore them
And forget them in a hurry

I have my fear
I am a Good Man no more
For I have broken
And long forgotten
My rules of love and war

You wanted me
But now you have her
I'm only concerned
Because you flirt
With every girl

I broke your heart
Three times before
But if you break hers
Or take her innocence
You'll be dead by four

So *******.

You were there
In the cold of afternoon
And you were there
When I dozed off too soon
You were in my dream
Of parties and smoke
You were in my dream
And in it you spoke
You told how you'd been
And you stood a little close
A felt your lips on mine
As you slowly spoke
And I wanted to kiss
But listened instead
As you whispered and joked
About crazy in the head
For I knew you before
When you smiled quite sane
But then, I knew you before
You ever spoke with disdain
But then I got mad
As I slowly realized
That all the boys I have loved
Don't carry real eyes
For their eyes were all fake
With a bright shine of star
That hid their sad madness
Unless you looked from afar
And as I awoke
I knew the truth to be
All the "sane" boys I've loved
Are all crazies in my dreams

I have a confession,
But more of an obsession;
I don't wear this dress
Just to impress.

Yes, I like to dance
And sing and prance
But I feel most happiest
When you're most sappiest

And we can be crazy
Although we're lazy
And I don't feel like a mess
With you and this dress

Hello Mr. Stranger
I think I'm in love...

With that smile
Those freckles
That look in your eyes
You're happy
You're cute
And you look good in ties
You're a faraway stranger
We've never talked once
But when you walk by
My heart skips a bounce
My cheeks turn to blush
When I think of your name
I know you not at all
But like you just the same...

Oh, Mr. Stranger,
I swear I'm no liar
It's only your voice
And your hand I desire

"Oh, mom, oh look!
The Circus is in town!"

"Oh, dear, I'm sorry,
That ship has sailed."

****.

There is a story
Of the Chinese old
That whispers of lovers
And red strings it told
But I ask you this,
You Chinese of old
Where is my lover
And the string he holds?

I look at my teachers
Who stand in the very front
Of every single class
And teach me how to be
How to grow and learn
And be well rounded

I think of everything they know
All which they have learned
From textbooks
And from life
All of which they share
And that of which they don't

I think of their kindness
Sometimes their hatred
How they smile and joke
Or judge and yell
Why they are who they are
And how they came to be

I think about their days
Every day is spent
Within four walls
With hundreds of teens
Who hardly give a ****
And how they get through it

I think about their thoughts
The knowledge they hold
And if what they're teaching us
Is what really needs to be taught
And if what they have to say
Is really what they need to say

I look at them all
And I wonder
What they could teach
What I could learn
From each and every one of them
If the time and place and opportunity
Were given to us

And it makes me sad
To think that
All of my teachers
And my professors
Are all going to die before me
And I'll never know
I'll never learn
I'll never grow
From what they know
But never told

Because they only talked about
Synonyms or the quadratic equation
Or all the periodic elements
And they never talked about
What is most important in life
So we never know the important things like
Laughing
And pain
And having your heart broken
And crying for all the right reasons
And why we are the way we are
And how to get where we're going
And having dreams
And participating in life
And telling people that you love them
And understanding death
And understanding life
And how to save lives
And to be open and vulnerable
And knowing that everything is going to be okay
Even if it's not
Because that's what truly matters on life

It makes me sad to think
That people go through life
Without ever knowing
All of the important things about life
Because no one ever told them
And they never experienced them

So what are we doing?
Why do we go to school
To learn about things that matter
But don't really matter
In the end?
Because in the end,
You don't think about
Synonyms or the quadratic equation
Or all the periodic elements
You think about your life
And the the people,
Even the teachers
Who got you through it
And made that difference

You think about those few
Oh, so few
Teachers who taught you
The important things
About life
And how that
Made all the difference

Loose lips sink ships
Is what they all say
But tight lips, I fear,
Go the same way

When something is said,
A secret is told,
A whisper of pain,
A heart left cold,
You feel not at ease
And sense you must speak
But is this dark thought told
A secret to keep?

So the question lies
In the who, why, and how
Of keeping a murmur
Or speaking aloud

Innocence isn't just a
Thought
Theory
Feeling
State of Mind
Age
Lack of Knowledge
Purity
Cleanliness
Innocence is more
So much more
Than I ever believed it was
Or could be

I grew up
Maybe a little too fast
And all at once
And where I once was
Innocent
Innocent
Innocent
My mind grew
And expanded
And now I know
Of many many things
I wish I didn't
And no longer am I
Innocent
Innocent
Innocent
But I lack the
Thought
Theory
Feeling
State of Mind
Age
Lack of Knowledge
Purity
Cleanliness
Of
Innocence
That I yearn to have once again
But will never have again
Because once Innocence is lost
It cannot be found
Ever
Again
And you are forced
To sit
And see
And observe
The innocence around you
And mourn over
Your very own
Innocence
Which
Is
Long long
Gone.

School is...
A place of laughing
A place of love
A place of smiles
A place of hugs

School is...
A place for sitting
A place for learning
A place for writing
A place for earning

School is...
A place that hopes
A place that cares
A place that's safe
A place that shares

School is...
A place to go
A place to be
A place to hear
A place to see

School is...
None of these things.
Not a single one.
So go **** school
'Cause it's ****** you, son.

Follow me, small child,
To the ends of the Earth
Follow me, blind child,
I'll teach you of hurt

I'll show you the sick,
The broken devils of hate
I'll show you the drugged
For whom help came too late
I'll show you the people
Who have done many wrongs
And I'll show you these people
Have been lied to all along
The people with scars
And tongues of barbed wire
The people with bitter
And ****** hearts of liar
I'll show you the sad,
The angry, the lost
And I'll show how their place
That came with a cost

These people so sad
Once wore different shoes
Be warned, small child,
They once were you

I'm growing growing up and down
Arms going up up the wall
And feet going
Down
Down
Down into the ground
Below my toes
Which have popped out of
My old Chuck Taylors
And burrowed into the brown dirt
And spread themselves to the ocean
Where my soul can be free and I can dance
And sing with all the wrong notes without a care
Because I will be higher than the clouds way way up in the sky
Kissing Jupiter
And laughing laughing on my long fall
Back to Earth
Where I will burrow myself
Into your eyes
Which I have left a little more than teary
And make you laugh in that way
That you HATE HATE HATE
But I love love
And I will bring you with me the next time
That I decide to grow and grow
Because I am sorry that I left you behind
As I grew
Because I left you behind
While you shrunk
So so small
And
D
     i
s
     a
p
     p
e
     a
r
     e
d

Forever
Beneath me

I want to hold the world
Just a marble in my hand
I want to save the world
If you let me then I can

I'll put it in my pocket
The one that's by my heart
I'll put it in a locket
So it won't break apart

I'll hold it close and dear
In hopes that it won't shatter
I'll always keep it near
So war and hate won't matter

They won't destroy my world
The one which I have saved
For nothing in my world
Will ever need be saved

Good morning Elizabeth,
Elizabeth two
Hello, hello
How do you do
Elizabeth Ann
You've grown quite tall
You used to be
Oh, so so small
Just a name
Upon a screen
Just a poem
Rarely seen
But now you're a girl
With a lovely name
With pain in your chest
But love just the same
You're a girl with words
That speak of life
A girl with words
Sharp as a knife
Elizabeth Ann,
Elizabeth two
You used to be me
But now you're a you

Pickles for one
Pickles for two
Pickles for some
Pickles for few
Pickles for smiles
Pickles for laughs
Pickles in wholes
Pickles in halves
Pickles for Henry
Pickles for Sue
Pickles for everyone
Pickles for you