I hate that your name still catches,
and your face still makes me drop,
there seems to be no escape.

my hair a halo,
veins rivers wielding through,
my face a solar system,
skin like milk,
knees are the dunes,
eyes hold the ocean,
mouth contains the storm,
tongue hailing down,
purple under eye bags, same as winter clouds,
this is my body,
sometimes I wonder how

the blinds are shut,
the shutters closed,
nobody appears to be home,

but here we have a glow
from deep inside,
perhaps a glimmer of lost pride,

the light shone through the shutters,
a floodlight on the grass,
they were at home

oh at last!

at last!
I know who I am,
I'm honest, I'm loyal.
old music is my preference,
I'm a romantic and can't hold in my admiration
for what I believe to be good,
I read a lot,
I like action and horror,
silver jewelry only,
I love your naked body as much as your naked soul,
for you can have me now,
because I am now complete,
I've found the love for me
that has always been within.

my nails dig deep,
and nobody knows,
the secrets I keep,
the darkness grows.

I shall never be the best in anything I do,
because for every poem I write there's always Duffy,
every equation I complete, Einstein always knew.
Every maths question successful had Pythag around before,
for my paintings there was always Monet,
or Da Vinci perhaps.
for every ball I sway against, Murray has already touched.
You see for me,
I will never exceed,
I will just be a possibly,
a hope,
a could have been.

hold my jaw I beg of you,
despair when I'm not there,
find my scent lingering in
every room I've vacated,
escaped hairs attached to your clothes,
and smudges on your pillow case.
long for my touch,
and the tangle of my mane
when I have fled to return home
scrawl me letters that don't make sense
but scar so deep,
plead for me to not go
and hide the lump in your throat
think of me everywhere
in all your empty space
I shall linger and drift
awaiting your consistent warmth
that exudes from within.