Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
 
Sep 2018 · 168
21
Kapil Dutta Sep 2018
21
Sitting in my room alone,
voluntary isolation.
Listening to Bach’s sonnet,
trying to discover the right annotation

For this tragedy that I’m living,
Boy prodigy is lost in the
absence of his life’s meaning

Eyes unfocused,
Forging his dead identity.
Locked inside his
own mind’s cage

The walls are
dark in here,
they were painted
with his own fear

Feeling intimidated
by the presence of this devil,
who’s older than half my age

We both grew up together.
He is the Master,
I’m his Slave

Every once in a while,
I like to ask him
how my insecurities taste

He has been
feeding on them
for aeons,
since I’ve been
seeding my ideas
with crayons

What’s that, are you feeling sad?
Let us hop onto Instagram.
Let us binge through stories
and vicariously drink the joy
other people like to brag

Have you received a DM yet?
In the last five mins?
Let’s go back and check.
After all, isn’t your self-worth
a puppet to the notifications you get?

Trying to use my smartphone
as a prosthetic to support my
handicapped happiness,
because I cannot for the life of me
find it inside my mortal existence

Sorry Complex,
but can we take a recess?
Could I borrow your
mental health issues?
I would like to use them
as tools to build
my own little Universe
for the World’s muse

“Dude, you are so smart”
Thanks, I appreciate that.
But what’s my intelligence
gonna be worth,
when I suffocate out of my breath?
Choked by this sociopath
named Loneliness,
he likes to **** people in a slow death

He has a gang of thugs,
Anxiety is his cousin,
Depression, their Godfather
Insecurities, the Uncle who has been
molesting me since my childhood

They sneaked up on me in the alley,
while I was hopelessly looking
for love and acceptance.
They kidnapped me from my family,
and took away my ability to make friends

Now I can’t find a single person
who understands me,
Or even genuinely cares
No one from my past
who wants to make amends

Should I OD?
Shoot myself in the head
or jump off the edge?

Don’t worry, innocent bystander,
these are only metaphors.
I’m not actually trying to **** myself

Sorry to disturb
your browsing session,
please continue living your life,
I was only crying for help
Or attention,
whatever fits your worldview.
You can call me the crying wolf

Don’t you get it Complex,
the world doesn’t have the capacity
to bare your illness

Can you be stable
for a ******* minute,
you narcissistic *****?
Do you have problems or not?
Can you stop fluctuating
for your friends sake?

Sure, let me just tune my mind
to a different frequency.
Wait, that’s strange,
the radio seems broken.
Are you having the same
problem as me?

It’s been a couple of years,
since I discovered
that my birth was an error
in human evolution

I looked under the microscope,
my DNA strands are coded in
A, D, H and D
I cannot afford to pay the shrinks fee,
so I’m trying to find my own solution

I’m glad that you
looked it up
on the Internet,
But I’m sorry, you don’t really
get what’s it’s like carrying
this weight 24 / Seven

When you want to fly,
as if you are superman,
around the planet,
7 times in a Second

The mass collapsing
under its own weight,  
you forgot to equate for
e = m c squared

Why are you carrying
all this dead weight?
Complex, let go of your history

I’m trying to! Don’t you see?
They just keep chasing after me
Jun 2016 · 1.3k
Oh Romeo
Kapil Dutta Jun 2016
...

Two years ago in time
Seventeen of age, twenty seven of mind
On this blue planet sewn with heart breaks,
Blood pouring like it’s red wine
Took birth a love story
Another one of cupid’s crimes.

Ten days to meet
Twenty to plant the seed
Forty, and they had their first fight
This is not a story of love at first sight.

Oh Romeo, do you remember
The day when you pulled her closer
To comfort your lonely heart
Signed an agreement with the devil that night
Which would tear your life apart

And now here we stand, reading your memorial.
Contemplating everything that went bleak.
You knew the outcome of this journey
Even before your feelings learned to speak.

It’s a dangerous equation,
When LHS does not equal RHS
The mathematics of life starts to collapse
Like an imbalanced swing abandoned by the kids

All you need is to be cared
To be a priority in someone’s life
I understand, little brother
But you cannot demand love as you like

Oh Romeo, I do empathize
You suffered from PTSD, I do realize
From when depression molested your feelings
And left you naked on the streets, bleeding

But you were the captain of your sail
You drove the Titanic to the bottom
With the ocean so deep,
It made her love for you rotten.

Her emotions were like
the wings of a butterfly.
They would flutter restlessly
from dawn to dusk.

Our conversations felt like
a trip to some remote hill station.
The view was pretty,
with a few crests
and countless troughs,
but I fell sick of the constant motion.

Oh Romeo, she did love you
After all, you felt like returning home
But love fades over time,
just like the memory of this poem.



-KD
Just another sad love poem acknowledging the day we started talking.
Feb 2016 · 949
Boyhood
Kapil Dutta Feb 2016
...

Five million seconds ago in History,
was born a mind full of curiosity.

Carried around in the skull
of a boy mere fourteen,
with an absent self
glued to a skinny body.

He would ponder for hours,
about everything visible
through the sockets of his eyes.
Life, Death,
Mortals and their problems,
all alike.

The Universe for him was a grand magical experience,
with the existence of the magician its greatest trick.

His role in this play called ‘Life’,
he decided, was to uncover the truth
behind the curtain of illusions.
And mask the cracks
of this sculpture called Society
with his creative solutions.

As the years went by,
the boy would raise
castles out of thin air,
with tools made of
Fantasy and Imagination.

Little did he know that
the concrete of his structures
were diluted with innocent assumptions.

That is when Reality shot him,
with bullets made of Solitude.

“Wake up, you need to make money”, she said,
as she wreaked his empire floating on the river Naive.

She would adopt him as her own son.
And claim his ideal self, his new father.

Together,
they would cremate
his boyhood years
and carve him into
The Man He Always Wanted To Be.

...

-KD
Also read "The Man I Want To Be" for context : http://hellopoetry.com/poem/692212/the-man-i-want-to-be/
Feb 2015 · 913
Yes, I Love You
Kapil Dutta Feb 2015
...

There was a way in her smile,
took me a while to notice.
For when love arrived,
I woke up from my September sleep.
Her words were the hands to the monster in her mind,
they would set fire to my emotions.
While her eyes would watch,
as my feelings would burn.
We were playing the battle of Love.
My sword was my Pen and my shield, her eyes.
“Yes, I Love You.”

There was a flavor to her lips,
I remember it from my dreams.
When we kissed with our words,
The Earth, The Water and The Sky would scream -
You Shall Never Be - and so agreed the reality.
“Yes, She Loves You..” whispered the tear in my eye.

There were words hidden in her eyes,
those that she never spoke.
And my heart would listen,
as my feelings would shiver in the cold.
Her eyes would read, ”Come, take me home.”
while her hands would refuse to touch my soul.
And my ears would ring to her words,
“Yes, I Love You.”

There was a certain magic in us,
even though I am not a magician.
There was a certain whisper from the Universe,
it secretly wanted us together.  
But how could we, when we were playing the battle of Love?
A battle that saw no winner and the death of Love.
And my mouth would repeat her exact words,
“Yes, I Love You”

And, I Love Her.

...

-KD
One of the most pure emotional poems that I have ever written.
Jan 2015 · 3.6k
Life Hacking
Kapil Dutta Jan 2015
It is when we hit the teen end, does the world follow the third law.
We get trapped in the beauty of fear, fear of falling behind.
We need a guarantee. A certificate will do that.
Lately, life fits into earning and burning of hard money.
What does the future hold? The great worry.
It's all about numbers, and they say 'us' can not be quantified.
What is this all about? Sit back and think.
Here life options serve as counting thin lines.
Where does the truth hold?
Wait for a novel to delta your philosophy or is your will a build of simplicity.
Chaos holds fear yet a win, but Simplicity my friend is the truth searched by the one hiding within.

Life Hacking is a way of living. Those who follow it might find themselves happy and at peace.
Its all about being in control.
You can be your own teacher, your own university.
Learn, not to earn but to understand.
And create, and innovate, and be different.
Have the courage to believe that you can change the world, because if not people like you, the modern society would not have existed.
You are the fuel to the engine that runs the world.
Don't waste it in being regular, Be Different.
Because, People who are crazy enough to think that they can change the world are the ones who do.
Hack your Life, Be the Change.
Explanation :
"It is when we hit the teen end, does the world follow the third law." :
The third law here is the third law of motion by Newton. It says,"Every action has an equal and opposite reaction". When we hit the teen years, our rebellious actions start giving a reaction with an equal force. We are pushed to start taking responsibilities and think about our future in depth.
"We get trapped in the beauty of fear, fear of falling behind." : As we start entering the real world, we start developing a fear. What if nothing works out? What if you fail to get a good job and live a stable life? Even the idea of it is scary. What if you fall behind everyone else in the race called Life?
"We need a guarantee. A certificate will do that." : Because we are so scared, we look for a guarantee that will ensure us a secure future. Thus, we work hard to get a University Education and score well in our exams so that we can get that certificate that can get us a good job.
"Lately, life fits into earning and burning of hard money." : In recent times, the meaning of life fits into earning and spending money. We now live a robotic life. Like machines, with no passion.
"What does the future hold? The great worry." : We constantly worry about what our future holds. To such extent that we forget to live our present.
"It's all about numbers, and they say 'us' can not be quantified. " :
Our life is all about numbers. When you are a student, its the marks that you score in your exams and when you are an adult, its the amount of money you earn from your work. Other times, its about your Blood Pressure or your cholesterol levels. Our life's are governed by numbers, even though most people say that you can not quantify the various aspects of us humans, like our emotions.
"Here life options serve as counting thin lines." : Imagine a series of very thin lines, now imagine counting them. It's not easy. Just like the  numerous life options that you are given as a young adult to choose from.
"Wait for a novel to delta your philosophy or is your will a build of simplicity." : We are all stuck in this illusion created by us. Some of us escape it, after being struck by realizations that come as a result of reading some adventure novels. We read and watch people who live their lives to the fullest, and we envy them. We want to be them. "Someday..", we tell ourselves.
Do you want to wait for a novel or story of some one else to change the way you live your life right now? Or do you have the will to take the step forward on your own?
"Chaos holds fear yet a win, but Simplicity my friend is the truth searched by the one hiding within." : The system built by us is chaotic. We work tirelessly and compete with everyone else, to gain a superiority and achieve some success. Its chaotic, its appealing and it works. To some extent. But still we are not happy people.
Why? That is because, it is simplicity that we are looking for from inside.

The next few lines serve as a guild to help you hack your life, to find simplicity and peace. To have the courage to make decisions that don't look profitable at first, but always end in absolute satisfaction when you are on your death bed reflecting on your whole life.

Thank you for reading.
-KD.
Dec 2014 · 6.0k
Happy Birthday, Princess
Kapil Dutta Dec 2014
...

It’s been seventeen hours and twelve days, since we said our last goodbye.
Since you were gone, I told myself that I could move on.
All that I needed was, someone like you to love.
But how could I forget, these is nothing, and I have checked,
not-a-thing in this universe that can take your place.
Because, Princess, Nothing Compares To You.

It’s a long way that we have walked, why should I now believe that we should stop?
And I have walked. A Thousand Miles I Have Walked,
just to be that man who didn't want to lose you.
Perhaps The Fault was in me.
But, Princess, I Just Don’t Want To Lose You.

Remember then, when in the August Rush,
I Drew You, to show my love.
For I had a reason to change, to be the perfect fit for your checklist, and The Reason was you.
And then you replied, by walking away a few miles.
We knew that this ain't true love yet, but you said you would Stay With Me.
And, Princess, why didn't you stay with me?

And how I wished for you to wake me up when all this ends.
And you woke me up before September’s end,
While I was still in bed,
Hoping to wake up with Amnesia.
Because, Princess, I was not fine at all.
No, I’m really not fine at all.

And then I woke up with Amnesia on a rainy October eve,
since you were just beside me, and that's all I need.
But then you asked me to not feel needed.
You told me to not love you so much.
But how could I not, when I’m Only Human.
And, Princess, I’m only a human.

On the day - a year back - when he was, where I am,
You told me that you felt nothing,
Like the nothing that compares to you,
for me.
Without a stab, I felt pain.
Without a wound, my blood started to drain.
My chest was heavy and I knew my heart was beating in vain.
But, Princess, how could I Make You Feel Something That Your Heart Won’t?

All this time that I have spent in wait of meeting this date.
17 hours and 12 days ago, I have missed my train.
The day that means more to me than to you,
How could I Let Her Go?
So Lets Be The Life Of The Party,
And remember to walk further more. Together.
Because, Princess, Happy Birthday To You :).

P.S. I Will Always Love You.

...

- Inspired by our songs. KD.
The words in Camel Case refer to our songs.
We stopped talking 12 days before her birthday, thus this poem.
Hope you liked it :).
Nov 2014 · 806
The One
Kapil Dutta Nov 2014
"The only thing
that I don't like
about this world
is the fact that
You & I
exist in two separate bodies
when we could easily live
in just One."

- KD || The One
Follow me on Instagram for more such quotes : @duttakapil
Nov 2014 · 4.1k
Sadness
Kapil Dutta Nov 2014
"I was happy, when sadness gently walked into the room and served me the most brutal slap that my feelings ever tasted."

KD || Sadness
Follow me on Instagram for more such quotes  : http://instagram.com/duttakapil
Nov 2014 · 8.4k
I Don't Care
Kapil Dutta Nov 2014
"You're not perfect, but I still don't care.
Because, when I say I Love You,
I don't just 'say' I Love You,
I mean it."

KD || I Don't Care
I am posting my quotes on Instagram, follow me there for more such quotes.
http://instagram.com/duttakapil
Sep 2014 · 1.3k
Leap Of Faith
Kapil Dutta Sep 2014
...

The one made for me is not you.
Because you are not ready for real love.
Not right now.
But you will be, someday.
The one made for me is the one you will be that day.

I’m here. I’ll stay.
I’ll wait.. wait for the moment to arrive.

Maybe it is a minute after you read this poem.
Maybe it is a minute before you take your last breath.
But, its okay.
Because..
A minute spend with you is worth a lifetimes wait.
No matter when it arrives.
I’ll be there.
Always.

Till the time you fall for someone,
who doesn't fit your checklist,
you haven’t fallen in love yet.
Because checklists are perfect,
while love is not.
So stop wondering if The Fault is in
you or in me or in ourselves.
Because there is no fault in the first place.

I’m here. I’ll stay.
I’ll wait.. wait for us to arrive.
Us  is greater than  you  and  me .
And it’s coming.
It’s probably late, but its on its way.
With every tick of the clock.
With every beat of the heart.
Us is coming, an inch closer by the day.

The one you  fixed, is the one you  killed.
But, its okay.
Because..
If you can fix me once, you can fix me again.
The night of the day you left,
was the darkest that I ever slept.
I was wrong, because I was scared.
So wake me up when all this ends.

How can you fall in love,
when you fear to fall?
You have questions that I can solve.
We are, but One.
Separated in Two.
Look through my eyes,
And see how we come true.

I’m here. I’ll stay.
I’ll wait.. wait for you to read the words
of the picture I’m trying to paint.

Thereby we sit, on the Edge
of the two sister cliffs.
One lives in fear,
while the other breaths in love.
Look up, will you not?
See, there is no bluff.

My heavens are not dark,
My love has not fallen apart.
For it is deeply rooted in the ground.
So won’t you look up?
Take that Leap of Faith?
Believe in my love,
Your tender heart is safe.

My love is here.
My love will stay.
My love will wait..
Wait for you to take that Leap Of Faith.

Queen.

...

-KD
Pretty self-explanatory poem.
I wrote this about a month ago.
I write poems only about those things I emotionally connect to, and I tried my best to capture my feelings and reflect them with the words I use in this poem.
This poem is really special to me, more than any other that I have written in the past.
I hope that the shouts of my feelings reach your ears and take you on the journey of the pain you receive while in love.
Feel free to provide me with your feedback and also if you like this enough, make sure you share it with your friends.

Listen to me narrating the poem while you read it : http://goo.gl/EXGVGD
Follow me on my blog for more such poems : http://goo.gl/EpQ6SD
Peace.
Sep 2014 · 1.1k
Thoughts About Death
Kapil Dutta Sep 2014
...

Death is like the full-stop to a beautiful Poem.

It becomes complete.

When you end a Poem, it doesn't cease to exist.
Instead it remains in your memory for as long as you are.

To be remembered.

To be celebrated.

Famous art works wouldn't have been famous in the first place had the artists not completed them.

A poem by a poet wouldn't have been appreciated had the poet not put a final full stop to it.

Beauty is not in the length, But in the end.

Life is a piece of Art.
Be the Art that is remembered for its beauty, not its existence.
...

-KD
My thoughts about Death.
Just Thoughts, Not really a Poem.
Sep 2014 · 898
I Feel Like
Kapil Dutta Sep 2014
...

I cannot tell you what I feel like, but I can try.
You left me hanging in mid air, but I still cannot fly.

It's like the Cupids arrow is stuck in my throat.
I can not swim, but I still can float.

I am broken, but I will survive.
When you left, you forgot to say Good Bye..

It's like I'm far away, but I am still near you.
Even though you left, I can still hear you.

Ours could have been a fairy-tale love story,
But you din't wanna walk on the road less traveled with me.

I was locked in a cage while you walked away with him.
I regret, because I know I can love you more than this.

I can forget the history, but I can not delete the memories.

I found my peace in you, but now you are gone.
In your leave, has chaos been born.

I was on the journey to reach my destination when I lost the way and became a Wanderer.

I am broken into pieces, Scattered on the ground.
Evaporated into Nothingness, Listen to the Quiet Sound.

Only if I could consist you within me..

Only if I could preserve you for eternity..

Queen.

...

-KD
I suppose this poem is pretty self-explanatory.
Listen to the quite sound of my absence.
Queen.
#ifeellike
Aug 2014 · 3.3k
The Fault
Kapil Dutta Aug 2014
"The Fault is not in the stars, The Fault is in me."
- Me.
the #fault #is #in #me
Jul 2014 · 1.1k
The Times That Have Passed
Kapil Dutta Jul 2014
...

The time we first started talking, We were two people.
The time we really started talking, We were two good friends.
The time we first met, She left me with a mark of Joy.
The times that have passed me now make me realize, How I want to go back and live them just one more time.

The time you tell her, Life is but a Movie.
The time you wonder whether her Heart Beat will ever be your favorite music.
The time you discover, Her presence is your favorite part.
The times that have passed you now make you realize,
How you want to go back and live them with her just one more time.

    "Never Stop Talking To Me."

    "Why?"

    "Just."

Maybe 'Just' will be our always..

The Time her name means more than Just A Name..
The Time a call means more than Just A Call..
The Time she means more than Just A Person..

The time she shows up as the New Face of Happiness.

The Times that have passed me now make me realize,
How I want to just sit down and rewind.

-KD
For more visit my blog : http://thekdradio.blogspot.in/
Kapil Dutta Jun 2014
...

When Life Slaps You In The Face,
Take a step back and look at what it says.

Lock yourself in the dark box of sorrow,
Drowned in pain, Let your thoughts follow.

Close your eyes and hold your breath.
Grab the chair across you and talk to yourself.

Take a lone ride on the path of fear,
Set free of what holds your tear.

Hear men accuse the artist.
Why desire, when you already exist.

When pain arrives, hidden in the palm of life.
May your soul not resist, Let happiness die.

Then at the funeral, let your mind discover.
Pain is momentary, Memories live forever.

...

-KD
For more, Visit my blog : http://thekdradio.blogspot.in
Jun 2014 · 1.2k
Leave Me Alone
Kapil Dutta Jun 2014
(1)

    Leave Me Alone, She asked me for.
    I gave up my soul, She lend me before.
    It was her I lived for, Now where do I stand with out her anymore!

    She never loved me, Nor my mind.
    But it is me who's hopes never die.
    My hopes now live in vain, Is this where the story stains?

    I can sorry her, but for what?
    She never would learn that my love is not a fraud.
    I have tuned hollow now, Where to run and whom to follow now?

    It ain't gonna happen again, It would be too insane.
    Now I have to live in this ocean of pain, because that's how I'm gonna win.
    I ain't gonna be "The Looser" in the end. Is there someone you wanna send?

     (2)

    Love. What is Love? A blend of pain and hope.
    For me, Not something mankind has been defining from it's toe.
    They have been shamelessly lying, Telling that love has ever since been flying.
    All through ages, Love has been forgot.
    Shakespeare was one of the last, Who could blast the world with love and even more.
    Next would be who? Who would be true?
    You might doubt.
    That would be my taken seat, Could there be anyone who can jump over this feat?


    (3)

    (A)

    I speak a word, But my feelings are never heard.
    They loose away while their companions are slipping forward.

    (B)

    My Love,
                    Now I ask for nothing more but an immortal curve on the floor of your face, To the depth of your gaze.

    (C)

    For many it would be tough to see through my poetical haze.
    But trust me, The cloud you can not think out is where my love has finally got.


    (4)

    I deserve to be laughed at. She is all normal, But me beating 20 at my 15th gate.
    Hate is all that I can get, For nervously striking jungles of irritating thoughts in her head.
    I am depressed, But why to dash her future with my fate?

    (5)

    The other side of my debates. This is not what I should get.
    There are rocketing drops of thoughts in my head, That a day would come when the right realization would hit her bed.

    (6)

    That is all very well said.
    But all I can really do is hope,
    Till I am finally dead...
      

-KD
Meaning :
This is a very old poem, also one of the most emotional ones that I have written till date. I keep this poem with me all the time, 24/7, everywhere I go, and I dedicated it to this one person whom I'm going to refer to as Miss. K. This is a very special poem for me, and very difficult to explain at the same time, but I would still try my best.

As a aid for explanation, I divided the poem into six parts. I would explain each part separately as a whole.

Prologue :
The origin of this poem lives in the womb of the message I received some two years ago. In the message, The protagonist or Miss. K conveyed  to me that she wants me to leave her alone and cease to exist in her personal life. As a reflection to those three sharp words - Leave Me Alone, I wrote this poem.

Part 1 : This is the most easy to understand part. Here I talk about my sorrow, The pain that I have received, My confusion on how to deal with this situation of rejection and more. I complain that even if I sorry her, She will not understand what she means to me. But, realizing that there is no one in my life right now who can console me, I start counseling my self. I propose the idea of not letting something like this ever happen again. I try to fight my emotions.

Part 2 : Here, in the second part, the philosophical state of my mind kicks in and I start questing everything.

What is love?
I discover that, Love is nothing but a blend of pain and hope. You always receive pain when in Love, They go hand in hand. And for your love to sustain, You need hope.

I then move forward sharing my thought that since ages, love has been defined as that happy feeling you receive when you are in a intimate bond with someone. But, following my thoughts, I think that love is not all about happiness, but also about the pain you receive along with it.
In support of my thought, I mention how Shakespeare was one of the only few artistic personalities who really understood true love, and you can see a reflection of that in his works. There is a reason why his famous work, Romeo and Juliet had a not so happy ending.

Then I float to the realization that not many understand true love in the actual sense. This leads me to the conclusion that I am one of the very few who face and realize what true love truly means.

Part 3 :  The third part is my favorite, and to explain it in detail, I divided it into three more parts. I will be explaining each separately.


    A :   "I speak a word, But my feelings are never heard.
            They loose away while their companions are slipping forward."

I want to communicate. I want to explain. I want to convey my feeling to her but the tool I have been provided with by virtue is my mouth. I need to speak up.  But, speaking alone would not help. I need to carefully wrap my feeling around the words I utter, and set them on the voyage to reach her beautiful mind and hope that she will understand.
So, with all the courage that I consist within me, I speak.
But as soon as I open my mouth, I dash into the realization that my feelings are so delicate that the words I utter just can not handle them.
Thus, when the words start falling out of my mouth, The bond that I set between them and my feelings, falls apart and soon I though see the words reaching her ears, I sense the absence of my feelings.
Disappointed, I look down, and see my feelings falling on the ground.
Thus, in those two line, all I am trying to say is, my feelings loose away and fall down while their companions, the words I use to convey them slip forward to reach her ears.

    B :   "My Love,

                                 Now I ask for nothing more but an immortal curve on the floor of your face, To the depth of your gaze."


Here you can see me attempting to write a brief two line letter to Miss. K. In the letter I try to explain to the girl that, there is not much that I need from her. All I am asking for is an immortal curve on the floor of her face, which translates to an never ending smile on her face. I want her to be happy all the time, To discover happiness in every fraction of second that she lives, Every gaze of the outside world that she takes.

    C :  "For many it would be tough to see through my poetical haze.
             But trust me, The cloud you can not think out is where my love has  finally got."


By now I realize that the people who will read this poem in the future, will not be able to understand anything thanks to the poetical haze that I create here. So, in accordance with the complexity of the poem I try to assure the reader that the love I hold within myself for Miss. K reaches even beyond the average maximum, which is what the Cloud 9 stands for. Normally Cloud 9 is referred to as the maximum state of happiness, but for me, its even beyond that.

Part 4 : As I said, I wrote this poem some two years ago. I was 15 years old then, but my thought process and the way I use to talk made many people think that I am too mature for my age. They would say that I think and talk like a 20 year old guy. But she was nothing like that, she was just another normal average teenager. This wide difference in my thought process and the realization that she might never understand me, made me super nervous which eventually lead me to poke her with all the thoughts that use to hover in my mind at that time.  I send her long irritating messages which for obvious reasons she did not like. Thus, all this directs me to the conclusion that her hate towards me is justified. In the aftermath of all this mess, I tell myself that even though I am depressed, I do not have any rights to irritate her with my mournful out of control roaming thoughts, and I should stop trying to dash her future with my fate.

Part 5 : In a counter flow of ideas, I try having second thoughts about whether or not I deserve what I am getting in return of all the love that I have. I know that she does not understand me nor does she realize how much I love her, But still I stick to the hope that someday the realizations will hit her. Some day she will understand. Some day she will know.

Part 6 : In the conclusion of it all, that is in part 6, I talk about how good a poem this is. I complement myself, telling that perhaps reading this she might finally understand.
But I also remind myself that I can write as many such poems as I want. I can be Philosophical, Creative, Artistic and try everything possible to make her understand but in the end, all  that I can really do is Hope!

Hope till I am finally dead.

Thank you for reading.
Like it, Share it.
http://thekdradio.blogspot.in/
KD
May 2014 · 822
Life and Death
Kapil Dutta May 2014
...

What is life and what is Death?
Two bits of the letter set.

For the paper, just a word.
But in you another world.

Yes, that is true, for everything lies within you.
None the less they make a huge mess.

Like a painting on a canvas, Drawn by an artist from the ashes.

The sins are thy flaw, with out death life is raw.

You can not picture the taste with out the thirst.

To know death, You need to walk through it first.

...

-KD
May 2014 · 8.6k
Sorry
Kapil Dutta May 2014
...

I woke up from my dreamy sleep,
brought up in bright air.

Joyous bluffs everywhere.
Too mature was I, they say.

Hurt my soft heart many a times.
Look back, Life’s of some different kind.

From don't matter to I don't care.
I traveled through a lot of empty air.

I got hurt. Now I hit.
Blood leaking from my very good end.

Shouted - I Don't Care!
Thundering came a echoing beat.

All it said was, Sorry my lady.
I knew what it meant.

Blind me to the holy death.
Rain it is. Taking the world in, I said.

Drain me out. This is insane.
Do fast forward me through this pain.

Sorry. Sorry Is all I say.
Cause there is nothing left to gain.

...

-KD
A simple sorry.
May 2014 · 1.5k
The Man I Want To Be
Kapil Dutta May 2014
...

The man I want to be, the one hiding behind the tree.
It's time to discover, is it the real or the art lover?

Miles away rings a familiar tune,
like the bottle filled with water from various spoons.

Do you envy or you pity?
Hope I sink in or am I guilty?

Knows the time and the trees,
am I real or the leaves.

Like the apple, I fall down.
Mean less, yet I sing the song.

I see him for now, killing the bug somehow.

No hopes will die in vain, for he will be a blend.

The Man I Want To Be, No more hiding behind the tree.

...

- KD.
Meaning :

In this poem I am trying to figure out who I want to be in the future. The poem is pretty simple, But there are few terms that translate to a peace of my life.  Here are few of them :

The line, "It's time to discover, Is it the real or the art lover" translates to - It's time for me to find out if I want to do something relating science or art.

Then the line "Miles away rings a familiar tune, Like the bottle filled with water from various spoons " translates to - the distant future holds a story that is comforting, a story about a person I have always thought to become. This person is a polymath, Someone who is into more than one fields, For example - Leonardo Da Vinci.

Then the line, "Do you envy or you pity"  is a direct question to my future self. I am asking him if he envies the present me or if he is disappointed with what I am right now.  
  
In the line,"Hope I sink in or am I guilty" I am hoping that I will be what I want to be but what if I commit the crime of failing to become what I want to become.

Then in the line,"Knows the time and the trees" I am literally imagining myself walking done the lonely path  in a forest, like in the picture above. The entire path being my life, and what I will be in the future is known only by the future time and the trees that will surround me at that point of time in the future.

Then,"Am I real or the leaves" simply means, Am I going to be a science guy or a creative art guy.

In the line,"Like the Apple, I fall down" the Apple here relates to the apple that fell on Newton's head which eventually made him discover gravity. The apple served as the source of a great revolution or change in science, and just like that apple I am hoping  to serve as the source of a great revolution for the humanity in the future.

Then in the end the line, "No hopes will die in vain, for he will be a blend. The man I want to be, No more hiding behind the tree" shows that I am confident that my hopes are not going to die and that I will become what I want to become, that is a blend of everything, science and art together. A polymath.

Thank you for reading.
KD.

— The End —