I know
we could form a world
All our Own
But
as I lift my head
and stars spin back
into alignment,
the slipping is reversed,
no longer Falling,

Floating,

We Remember
we can bring Fire to the Sea,
return Chaos to Habitation,
Embrace the Earth,
bring all to Ashes once again.
We remember Nothing is Forever
and the World must be Shared
with all the Powerful Beings.

Becuase when Stars Collide
the world will Burn
and we Beings will burst
into a million stars.

Watch me as
I return from the
Rubble
trace backwards
the Line of Fire
Try not to Gawk
as Ashes bleed together
form a shadow
devoid of all previous
Mutilations
Ready to Take on
the shape of Life
Keep your Skepticism to yourself
as I stretch newly formed
Perfect arms
toward Heaven
shudder as Breath pours
into my lungs
Linger
to expierence anew
the Taste of air
Life,
seen as a Privilege,
Takes on all new Forms

I know my scars hurt you
and Suicide is Selfishness
I know when my energy transfers
you feel only pain and anger

But even worse than the destruction
I've done to my skin
and my veins
is the rot I've spurred inside

But today I am making
You a Promise
I Refuse to Decay
masochism will no longer be
my Only Friend

and I will not be Perfect
and pain will remain
a Constant Companion

But I am applying Tourniquets
the mass ocean of blood
will soon slow to
an Occasional trickle
and medication will be given
only PRN
and sometimes I may go for a walk
and Smile
at Nature and God

I'm not saying I am changed
I am simply trying
to grow
so please, just be Patient
just be Kind

all Humanity
is a Story within one
anothers Story

ink spills the same as blood
dark and thick
full of pain
releasing hidden desires
the spilling of each is
an art form of necessity

we do not
find Love in
our Soul Mates
we do not
find Peace in
our Gods
we do not
find Confidence in
our Dance Partners
we do not
find Strength in
our Friends

we find these in
our Soul, in Ourselves
we are Creatures
of Excellence
continuously ignoring
our Potential

Stand Up and Fight
Find Power In Yourself

I may not Know who
I am, but I Recognize
pieces of me,,
in Contemplation
in Time alone
in Others

we are all a Hodge Podge of
pieces, a Mosaic
cracked, yet beautiful

allow the Pain
to invade
provide permission for the
Violent waves
of Agony
to Wrack your body

because I'm not Good
at heart
I am a midnight crow
a bad Omen
I am a black hole
waiting to Swallow you up

there,
behind my intestines
pressing against my stomach
reach down,
down my throat
grasping and digging
Pull, Yank, Pry
stuck.
I feel its Yearning
to spill over and Spew
past my tongue, teeth, and lips
Breath is no where
to be found
doubled over
no Tears
Fear. Resentment.
Begging, please, I am pleading
for the Escape
No Force left
worn, tired
lapsing into Despondency

Once again, I choke
on Truth.

Do not shrowd my head
with new confusion
untruth, half truth, soon truth
Do not pull me back
as the instinct of flight takes over
Do not ask me
question(s) I can not answer
Do not distract from
my melancholy
Do not make me
new, different, unsure
Allow me to Fear

my Heart spills over
I can not
Contain
Words not fit
for the Light of Day