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 Sep 2015 Disappear here
marina
i used to have all the words
in the world
at the tips of my fingers,
waiting to be written
down or maybe even
touched to my lips
to be sung

have i said all there
is to be said?
Innocence is the days when
I thought that monsters
lived under the bed rather
than slept right beside me.

It was the times I feared
heights almost as much as
I now fear brooding stares.

Back when I thought
passionate love was the
only kind worth having
— that I now wish for a
lover who loves quietly.

Innocence was thinking
danger was an ill-advised
adventure, not a man.

It was admiring a tornado
heart and not realizing the
damage it would cause.
© copyright
Rejection.
Is the darkest intention,
That God could have given to man.

Rejection.
Is the darkest invention,
It's almost as if Satan were always a part of the plan.

Rejection.

It makes us.
It takes us.
It shakes us.
It breaks us.

Rejection.
Is such a horrible feeling,
That nobody should have to bear.
So I reject it, instead.
This is not Goodbye, it seems,
Our story has only just begun.

As we flicker through the pages,
I ask..
Will we make it past chapter 1?

Will will make it to the middle?
Will we make it to the end?

Will we make it to the sequel?
Perhaps a trilogy, we intend.

So as the storyline it changes,
I ask..

Will you be my main protagonist?..
Oh yes, Will you be only friend.

Will you be my favourite character?..
In a book that never ends..
 Sep 2015 Disappear here
nina
If I die
By the palms of the ocean
Just know
That I am where I am meant to be
 Sep 2015 Disappear here
Elise
sitting on top of the world
literally and figuratively
looking over a valley so gorgeous
i wasn't even sure it was real
sitting next to a girl i barely knew
whose smile warmed the chilled air around us
i watched the rolling fog
form and disband shapes
taking my thoughts with it
a moment so pure
it will stay frozen in time
not even the rolling fog
could sweep away the memory
of a simple, silent moment
spent with the beautiful girl
that i barely knew
Written 8/28/15 on a backpacking trip to Mt. Townsend in Washington after watching the fog roll through a valley.
Anxiety is preparing yourself to say "here" when the teacher does attendance.
Anxiety is shaking so bad you can barely keep food on a spoon.
Anxiety is being so quiet that even your mind stops for a second.
Anxiety is never texting first because you feel needy.
Anxiety is not being able to walk up to the teacher to hand in a paper.
Anxiety is always sitting in the back of the class so you don't feel eyes know you.
Anxiety is being afraid. All the time. Afraid to love, to smile,  or even to say hello.
Anxiety is only having a few friends because it's hard to talk to people you don't know.
Anxiety is wanting to talk to the cute boy who sits across from you, but you're afraid of him knowing the real you.
Anxiety is finally saying hello

20 times in your head
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