The cold mornings
Waken perseverance
Kiss a smile
On my numb face

There's a memory
Locked in that cold
Desperate and exciting
Hopeful and exposed

Maybe the cold will bring us closer
Maybe something can warm our bones
Maybe love's around the corner
Waiting for me before I get too old

There's foggy windows
And ice crystals
The shade of the lamp's glow
In the midnight snow

There's a taste of winter
On the frozen lisp
Of breath escaping
With a gentle mist

There's something noticed
In such neglect
The soul burns brighter
When hope is left

When it fades
And hope expires
The last caress
Of sleep is dire

DireSleep Oct 7
Die

You want to blame me for something
I'm a normal man
I let myself bleed
Like the rest

The knife digs deep
but it doesn't hurt me

It feels like destiny
Just like the rest of the pain

So sincere
Just like your lies

Cut here
And I'll die

DireSleep Oct 4
Die

There's a thousand ways I could write this
A hundred ways to lie
I could own my own pain
Or I could turn away and hide
I could find my voice and face this
Or I meet the edge of a knife
But no matter the choice that I make
It will change the rest of my life

I hear my mother laughing
I can hear my grandma cry
My grandpa scolds me in his stern voice
He knew I couldn't lie

You could call it a sign from david
In the end its the truth
I can find my own way
Or I can learn to die

DireSleep Sep 24

The heart begins to fade
And the chest begins to drown
And the stomach begins to drop
It all mattered once before

I could have laughed out loud
I could have smiled at the site
But its all left me now
It's gone, its gone forever

I want to lose myself
I want my memories to grow faint
I want to lose it all
I want to lose forever

I know I've died before
I know I'll die again
By my hand or by yours
A curse I've bore forever

I want the cold to wash
Clean of memories
Of movement and of speech
Free from thought forever

I want death to hold me now
Like no one has cared before
So inlove with me
That it lasts forever

DireSleep Sep 23

If you ever loved me at all
I will never love again
If you ever loved me at all
I would rather live forever
And never love again

DireSleep Sep 12

I've been breathing just fine
I've been holding it together
I'm working so hard
And I've only got myself to impress
And the months become years
And the years aren't counting
I would start to feel lost
If I had anything left to lose
The mornings are bare
And waking is such a chore
Pick my head from the bed
Get showered and dressed
The drive would be something
If it wasn't something insignificant
An excuse to sing
And fill the emptiness with blues
Its moments like this
Where I wish I was just a little bit braver
I would go for the kiss
And I'd be holding her hand
There's a magic I miss
Hiding out in the dark
And if you filled it with love
A fire would spark
Instead I'm driving alone
And spending every day just the same
With my dreams in a cage
Just a song and a band
I light up a cigarette
And fill my lungs with the smoke
I notice the sky
The stars on a sheet
I realize the times
Where I miss all their wonder
Dead inside
I hang my head in defeat
But this is the moment
The moment
Where I ressurect Elvis
All the strength I can muster
To sing my songs to my lovers
And to dance instead of me
Elvis is the beautiful face
That I'll never be

DireSleep Aug 31

I'm trying so damn hard to smile
Trying so damn hard to be okay
But the evil that whispers like shivering cold
Its the evil who wont admit what they know
So they gaslight to make you hate yourself
And a bullet is the least painful way out
Wondering if death is ice or its fire
I just want to feel fine instead of so damn tired
Cause I'm the worse one
I'm the worse one

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