A dark and smokey coat
Glistens like a silver shadow
A brute and hungry force
Which lives deep within my soul

It wells within in my stomach
And bursts into my heart
My heart expells it to my finger tips
Wherein it's silence screams

Sometimes my arms are strong enough
To fight the beast with ease
But lately I'm a castrated man
Brought swiftly to his knees

How will I wear my age
When the heart begins its pace
How will I wear my age?

How will I wear my age?
When the lines begin and lies
Begin to define me
How will I wear my age?
When the years are all thats stood beside me?

The moments come again
When the drugs start kicking in
And I'm suddenly aware
Of all the weight that I've been carrying

For a moment I taste the sun
And the fact that its finally summer
But its night already
And day was wasted with mu worry

Every exhale I taste blood
And I swear to god
Its all this living
Thats killing me

Every inhale I taste numb
Just wishing I could catch my breath
Maybe if I could recall
How it felt to be at peace

Maybe if I could recall
Just how to be me

DireSleep 11m

I've gone past the border
There's no turnin' back
Drowned at the bottom
Of a leather tinted glass

Some say it's nothing
Locked in its grasp
But till you've met the devil
There's no turning back

What could I become
Who could I be
If I wasn't holding the gun
That's brought me to my knees

Where am I going?
I'm not moving
I'm tired of dying
The end is all I need

I used to have this wishful thinking
But I've lost my will to dream

DireSleep Oct 31

Sister sinister in all of her faith
Sister whisper's awaken the brave
Been tossed like a rag doll
Against the waves
Crashing so neatly
Where the rocks kneel to pray

Oh sunshine
Please wash away
All of the darkness
All of the saddness
All blushed on my face

Quiet now sister
Be not afraid
I write to heal wounds
While the sunshine's away

DireSleep Oct 31

I know you're reading
I know you see me
I know you revile in my undue
As I pace the walk ways
My head is bowed
My soul is too
There are smiles bright as sunlight
That keeps me walking
Even if it's but a few
There seems to be a moment
Where all unspoken
Is understood by you
I've never seen your face
I've never known
Who posessed the instrument to all my pain
Only that far too often
The cross of path
Was somehow preordained
But my lack of faith
Brings to question
What can a prisoner do?
Why wont you stop?
Is it until I'm dead?
Is that what I have to do?

DireSleep Oct 20

I'm terrified of my thoughts
I'm drifting into darkness once again
I've got this prescription for depression
And I've got six months worth of pills

Seems like someone wanted to give me an answer
Someone's giving me a way out
But if I don't get it filled
I can't swallow all those pills

Without the pills
It all just worsens
But when you can't trust the ones around
And you can't trust youself

Maybe death is the answer
Maybe it is the only way out

DireSleep Oct 12

The cold mornings
Waken perseverance
Kiss a smile
On my numb face

There's a memory
Locked in that cold
Desperate and exciting
Hopeful and exposed

Maybe the cold will bring us closer
Maybe something can warm our bones
Maybe love's around the corner
Waiting for me before I get too old

There's foggy windows
And ice crystals
The shade of the lamp's glow
In the midnight snow

There's a taste of winter
On the frozen lisp
Of breath escaping
With a gentle mist

There's something noticed
In such neglect
The soul burns brighter
When hope is left

When it fades
And hope expires
The last caress
Of sleep is dire

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