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Didi Sep 2020
I have been fighting for a year
Awaken nights
Rivers of tears
Negative Thoughts
But I got you
I earned you

When I knew
It was like waking up
at the sang of the birds
Sun is rising
Even though I can not see

Now that you are so close
I am afraid of burning
Of being reduced to ashes
And be gone by the wind

The feeling of not being enough
Steals the air around me
Pushes my throat and my chest
And colaps me

I got you
Although I have to conquer
And I wish I could be sure
That I can
  Oct 2019 Didi
Alex Teng
We fell in love by chance,
We stay in love by choice.
  Oct 2019 Didi
Syll
You are a fighter.
You have been fighting for a while.
It has been hard,
But you can get through it.
There will be tears shed.
But it helps to get the emotion out.
If you don’t feel safe,
Please tell someone.
They can try to help you.
They might have to tell your family,
But they do it to protect you,
They want you to stick around.
They don’t want to think you can’t trust them.
Because you can trust them.
It may not feel like it sometimes,
But they tell someone for your benefit.
They love you.
I say it again, if you don’t feel okay or safe,
Please Tell Someone.
10-29-19
This is for a good friend of mine.
  Oct 2019 Didi
Morgan Brehilt
Sometimes I think of killing myself
How the end would be so nice
How the darkness would swallow me up
And how the numbness would suffice
My need

For all the voices of the feelings
That constantly keep me reeling
To softly slow to a hush
As my brain starts tur-tur-turning into mush

How wonderful it would be
To have that powerful silence
Not even grasshoppers would bother
To wake me

My cells would stop dividing
My brain would stop the lying
Myself would stop denying
What I truly want

But but but
This is just a reckless fantasy
A way to elude one’s own reality

Because as I sit here on the floor
Tears drip drip dropping
I realize there’s those who care for me more
Cherish me more
Love me more
Than I love my own self

The crickets chirp
I put the pills down
Didi Oct 2019
I'm in a lightful room
Surrounded by darkness
My mind shouted
The silence broke
I cried
But no one knew

Yes - I said

— The End —