I can hear you singing
is it about me?
is that vain?
am i weak?
can this approaching anxiety leave?
can i just be me?
can i please be free?

these thoughts are destructive
they're decay on my positivity
my hard earned sanity
my clarity

clouding my emotions
feeding my every insecurity


**Please, Please, Please Anxiety
Please let me be!!

I may be completely insensitive with the case
My eyes narrowed for a chase
But it seems that you don't care
Willingly i want to help
But for a reason I'm too scared
Facing my fears is no game
Trembling hands and heart in an ace
How will i survive?
Would you help me?
Or should i allow myself to be drowned?
Drowned with the feelings i cannot contain.

When I'm gone
  Call the sun
           Let it shine
      I won't leave
   With a sky in tears
                         Burry me
                 In blue
       Let me disappear
  Without a clue
Tell him to smile
             At least
              I didn't bleed
              Call the stars
  Let them meet
                      The sun once
                           Tell people
                    About my dreams
                        About the person
        Drowned in my tears
About the person
        I wanted to be
                 About the reasons
                    helped me to live
         And about the things
Made me leave

I got a future
As bright as my thoughts
I got thoughts
As bright as
my favorite color Black

but

i don't want your advice about hanging in there
i don't want to hear about how i should wait for the rest of my life to begin
i don't want to hear about what should give me light
i don't want to hear about the struggles of valuable lessons or the triumph of hope

i don't want empty promises or vacant encouragements
i don't want your moral high horse or veiled condescension

i want to hear your honest opinions
i want to hear your soul cry out in protest
about how you're drowning your sorrows
about how your brain feels like a worn out sponge
and your heart an old wrung rag

i want to hear how you're close to giving up
i want to hear how you're burning out
i want to hear how coffee makes you shake
i want to hear how you need pills to sleep
i want to hear how the thoughts of your future scare you more than your past ever did

i want to hear all your fears.

i want to know that in all of mine,
**i'm not alone.