I don't know this feeling.
All I know is that
I'm drowning...
Drowning
in a mixture of
bliss and agony...
Love?
Is that it?
Because, if so, then...
Oh my ******* God...
is this ever so confusing?!
10 years
20 years
30 years
40 years
50 years?!
Wow...
um...
That's a really long time.
Will it last?
No ******* clue.
But still,
when you
find someone
who
meshes beautifully
with your quirks,
You at least have to try...
Right?
I know what you're thinking...
"I can't do it."
"I'm scared."
"What if something happens?"
I understand.
You're bruised.
I guess some people
never got the message,
"Hearts aren't punching bags."
Those *******
don't deserve you!
But, you know who does?
Someone who respects you.
A person
who
sees your worst
and still *******
loves you.
And
if anything,
I'm sure
they're close by.
I wrote this in 2016 while in the throws of relationship anxiety. It was a message to myself at that moment. Ultimately, the person I was referencing is no longer close by, but that's okay. The universe had different plans. I also cringe at my usage of the word "deserve" cause I've since then found an issue with it... one that perhaps one day, I'll write a poem about. But, I decided the keep the original format, excluding a few spacing and punciation fixes.