and by every kiss, every words
i’m just having fun
i love you,
just don’t take it seriously
i’m just having fun
because i’ve been through this
many times
i know it must meet the ends,
we’re just having fun
with the plastic love,
at least that's what we have

rindu berarti merangas,
kehausan akan tubuh itu
mulut ku gersang lalu bisu,
tidak dapat mengucapkan bahwa tubuhku ini haus akan tubuhmu yang sudah berpaling berjalan jauh.
Lalu, harus diguyur air apa raga yang sudah kering ini?
Atau, biarkanlah saja rindu merangas menggerogoti raga hingga tubuh tak berdaya
Ya sudah, biarkanlah mati dan di kubur hingga kau bersedia kembali membasahi lagi di atas tanah saat semua sudah sia-sia.

tatapan kosong yang mencerminkan kesuraman itu,
membunuh jiwaku perlahan namun pasti,
sekarang aku sekarat.
aku tidak menuntut banyak hal dalam hidup,
hanya butuh teman untuk bercerita dan bercengkrama.
sekarang sepi, akankah sampai mati?

jakarta jumat malam pukul satu lebih empat puluh tiga,
aku menyusuri sejuknya kota jakarta sehabis hujan.
semua tenang
seakan-akan sepi menyelimuti lembabnya jalanan,
seakan-akan semuanya sepi dan dinginnya menusuk,
seakan-akan semuanya tidak pernah cukup,
seakan-akan semuanya tidak akan pernah terjadi,
aku egois, sampai-sampai aku tidak pernah memberi tahu mu tentang ini
begini, bagiku kau adalah nirwana terindah.
sayangnya, kau bukan rumah yang aku cari.

seluas alam fikiran yang berkelana,
aku terbang melintasi dinding-dinding putih,
meratapi langit-langit hingga tak berdaya,
biar saja sepi,
toh aku sudah tidak peduli,
toh aku sudah menikmati perlahan
keheningan yang mencengkam ini,
walaupun tidak bahagia,
setidaknya semua tenang untuk sementara.

maybe we’ll meet again one day at the coffee shop in somewhere and then, the timing will be right and everything will be perfect

cold sheets, wet eyes
running in loop, hurt to death
does she know that we bleed the same?

meringis menyisat dada
berteriak dalam kesunyian
pilu hati yang sudah dua tahun ku pendam sendiri, akankah sampai pada ujungnya?
apa lagi cara yang harus ku lakukan,
mungkin tenaga sudah tak kuat lagi
bahkan
mungkin harga diri sudah hilang

tubuhku sudah terlalu enggan untuk semuanya,
jangan tanya pikiran,
aku bahkan berharap untuk menjadi orang gila saja,
Tuhan,
jika harus hidup seperti ini, biarkan lah aku mati saja.

this moment it's gonna be alright,
this time i'm gonna be ready,
you’ve fallen in love like a hundred times
and
you’ve got all upset
and
realized they were wrong for you
it's just a phase
it's just a phase

i gave up
as
i am slowly fading away
you will never knew
because
you broke us two

hi, how are you? im sorry for reaching out to you but it seems i just couldn't get it outside my head even though i will get over it, eventually. i just wanted to say im sorry for making you feel ****** the last time we had a conversation, it was never my intention to do so. i never expected that we could just end that way, and im sorry. i know you were so mad at me about it but really i never thought of you that way, its never across in my mind ever. anyway, thank you for making me the happiest person in a while even though it was really short. thank you for the calls, laughs, and time. i just wish we had a better breakup. i hope you happiness always.

i will love you
with everything
i have left.
my heart has been through war
but
even with wounds
i will kiss you with air.

You turned 24. You died at 23. Suicide. You used to left me a voicemail message, telling me how much you loved me. You died down the street from where we first really talked and got to know each other again after so many lifetimes of being apart. You promised me your blood, your fealty, your heart. I gave you everything I never had. I love you. Forever. I'll come to see you as soon as I shake loose this mortal coil. I love you. Goodnight.

suddenly every memories comes back
and
how happy we were.
i wish you were here
yet
i wish i could erase you forever
for good.

i always hate when its raining,
i hate how it smells
and
how everything got so soppy.

but then,
we were driving back and forth
and
that day wasn't that bad
and it turns out that was one of my favorite afternoon.

partly because you were in there with me,
partly because when you talk everything stops and there is nothing more beautiful than how you describe things you like,
partly because your eyes sparkled when you sing the song that you like,
partly because when you smile my heart skips a beat.

and no matter hard i tried
no matter how hard i really tried
at the end of the  day
its always you
and maybe you don't care anymore
you don't want to know any more
i love you
in silence without everyone have to recognize
and it's fine
because watching you from the far
is some kind of a whole new level of love
and i don't care if you still
but i will always love you
always
in my silence
always
always
always

on a fine day,  i would take you to the beach so we can sit and eat and we could just order so many takeouts from a Chinese restaurant.
on a fine day, i would take you to a park and i will teach you how to skate.
on a fine day, i would take you to a pottery class and we could make ugly art together.
on a fine day, i would take you to a dog park so we could play run and catch with Lulu.
on a fine day, i would take you to a coffee shop and we would just be sitting next to each other while reading books together.
on a fine day, i would just pick you up and drive to nowhere listening to songs.
on a fine day, i would take you to museums and i will hold your hands while we're passing some arts we sure we don't know anything about.
on a fine day, i would take you to concerts and we could just dance our *** off.
on a fine day, i would take you to an airport date and we could just be anyone we wanted to be.
on a fine day, i would take you to nowhere so we could spend some time watching movies and play games.
on that fine day, i would make you the happiest person in this whole world.

Arbeit spielen
Arbeit Arbeit Spiel
Arbeit Arbeit Arbeit Spiel
Arbeit Arbeit Arbeit Arbeit Arbeit Arbeit Spiel
Arbeit Arbeit Arbeit Arbeit Arbeit Arbeit Arbeit
Arbeit Arbeit Arbeit Arbeit Arbeit Arbeit Arbeit
Arbeit hart genug
und
vielleicht eines Tages genug Geld sparen
und
dann können Sie sich einen kleinen Urlaub leisten und
dann zurück zur Arbeit Arbeit Arbeit

i’m not allowed to say

i am thinking of you today.

because you don’t care

what i think,

i don’t tell you my ideas.

anymore.

she still loves me
she just not in love with me anymore

if you cant get
what you want,
but you can get me.

because you’re my medicine,
when you’re close to me
when you’re close to me.

if you cant get
what you want,
will you come with me?
up on melancholy hill.

have you ever feel so many things at once

then its start to creep you out

because you've been here before

you felt this before

and its start to ******* up

wherever you are in this big part of the world,
whoever you are holding your hands with,
and
whenever you're missing the love we used to share,

you should know-

there is always a piece of you in my heart,
and
you always have a place to call home.

i wish we would have met when i was comfortable with myself and i’m sorry for everything i put you through.
someday i’ll find you again, until then lets hope we both grew up and saved the stories we wanted to tell. or maybe we’re together in a different dimension.