there's a peace of mind
I'm on a journey for
scavaging and hunting for
what belongs to me
my sanity
I can't let you have
my love
and turn it into profanity
a curse
a joke
my deep passion soaking into your hands
as I watch you carelessly play in the dirt
here it comes
the hurt
races against joy
but insanity has come to steal the race
and the crowd makes the noise
I feel so out of place
I fell so deep into you, I no longer felt the light
then my skin became cold
following my emotions, or lack there of
my soul began to decipher
what feeds and what destroys

I am now waiting for my mind to fall in line
to find peace
my thoughts to find ease
finding a way to re-write our history
your name rings the very bell that controls my tears
when I close my eyes
I see yours
I repaint your lips and each word spoke
I hate you
then I love you
you watch me entangle with my emotions
you feed my despair
you stir my commotion
I feed you your energy that you allow to be stole
I fed you half of me
there's no way I can be whole
playing this game
your poker face is so perfect
and unphased
while I'm on this trip to neverland
a journey alone I never planned.

I need a peace of mind
a peace of mind I'll give you
you were my sickness
I need to heal you
disinfect the wounds you caused
the ulcers of false hope
the emptiness,
you wasted my time
you misplaced my crown
a blue river I have cried
its time for my smile to return now
....because even if you say it's not over
I know I won't die

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I woke up this morning to you towering over the foot of my bedframe.

Anxiety

When I stared blankly at my cereal bowl, disinterested and afraid to eat.

Anxiety

I take a shower at a snails pace, petrified of returning to the mirror to be bathed once again in your foul cocoon.

Anxiety

When I leave the house I look down at my feet, to escape the gazes of strangers with motives unknown to me.

Anxiety

As I cry alone in the bathroom stall, not knowing who to turn to for a problem that never leaves.

Anxiety

I just want you to know that you're killing me.

Anxiety

The tears that blur my vision burn
As they run down my face
But I feel my heart shiver
In the cave of my chest.
As the night approaches,
I begin to ponder my existence.
I wonder why life is such a hell of a friend.
Always breaking my heart,
Sending evil thoughts to my head.
I am alone,
I am depressed,
I am not myself.
Life laughs in my ear,
Reminding me of the faults I have made,
The fears that I have.
She always seems to win every fight.
She feels no pity for my pain.
And her laugh goes on and on
Trickling down my spine
Sending a shiver that shocks my heart
And I am left unable to breath.
Life is inconsiderate and very unfair
She always wins.

Let's keep Christ in Christmas
Say the stickers and the signs
When was the day we lost our way
And can we find it back in time

Perhaps if we focused less on us
And more on the risen King
He'd not only be in Christmas
But also everything

I'm not saying that old St. Nicholas
Does not serve out a purpose
But when it comes to saving souls
I'm pretty sure he's worthless

So let's keep Christ throughout the year
Not only in this season
Making it to those around us clear
He truly is the reason

The things we think about at night never lose taste,
Take the close to find something greater.

This wall has finally reached its end,
Its higher ground, lets make a stand.

Did you ever think that we would get this high?
Pull back the sheets to find an ending that you prayed for.

Now head towards the light
The dark has no place here.

To show you how I feel
To show you who I am
Cause it's locked away.

You don't feel real,
I don't feel real.

I don't feel real,
I don't feel right,
This pain is beating.

Well,
I'm not taking my time anymore,
Nothing feels real anymore.