The interiors of my brain feel like they're eroding away,
The person I once was has surely slipped away
Like my mind has sped up and there's no time to catch up
Each thought just a string of knots
Only to be undone one by one
Round after round
Knot after knot
No empathy for my own brain
If it's even worthy of said name
Only ever able to get the knots loose
Thoughts of using them as my own noose
Why everything I once knew all became fairy tales
All the stories, all the couples
All the glimmer, all the sparkle
Now filled with truth
We all swallowed the pill, silly youth
Everyone always wore a pokerface
For that I'd have you to thank
I've always had to learn all this, the hard way
Too young to comprehend
All I did was observe and eventually I would begin to understand
Not everything you see, is always what you are to believe
And not everything that you've heard,
Is to always be perceived so absurd
I sought truth behind every lie
Just wanted to find some sort of understanding as to why
But still I've found everything's too foggy for me to distinguish
Like a piece of me is always missing
Afraid to keep digging, afraid to look around
Afraid I'll find nothing, as if I'm empty and 6 feet underground
Afraid to feel anything other than disappointment and sadness
Everything is always expected, never any madness
Love, is always to become faded
Raw emotion is often tainted
Will leave you missing and wishing
For someone or something that once was
Always settling for anything capable of forgetting or sufficing
It's as though me and fate have always been kissing
Except fate was never on my side
*And oh how love could always be so blind
My undiscovered thoughts at 3 am