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If her eyes are dead,
Then her soul is dead,
And if her soul is dead, what's the point in living anyways.
Just a corpse wasting air,
Wasting breath.
Let the girl rest in peace.
Alan, the most wonderful and caring uncle God planted in my life
Your demise brought so much pain like I was stabbed with a knife
He stood for the perfect definition of love and bonds in family
That his departure almost made everyone dear to him tired of life
You taught me wonderful things with firmness, yet in love
Your happy and playful attitude, something you made us learn
You were simple and took life simply as it came
Everyday was a blessing you never failed to thank God for
I'd never felt so helpless my whole life that day you passed on,
I watched your once active body still in death and I couldn't wake you
I wanted to remove all those sheets around you and stroll with you
You were my father and you loved me like your own daughter
That image is something I could never block out  
I still don't know how to deal with you not being around,
I know this is something that would never pass easily
I don't wanna forget, because I don't want the image of you to fade
I want to place you in my heart always even though it aches
Tears come easily each time I remember the beautiful times we shared
My heart almost broke when your 3 year old daughter spoke with me,
That's a big responsibility I pray God help me to take,
You took care of us and left that little girl all by herself,
When she asked if I was coming on the phone I felt so bad,
I should have been there before she asked, she's my blood
And I promise I'm going to be there for her forever, as long as I live
I asked God to let me see you one more time, just one more time
And He did, 21 days after you died, I dreamt and saw you
I touched your hand and covered it with mine, it was warm
And you though dead, moved your other hand and covered mine too
You held my hand to your chest, it was the most wonderful feeling
I knew I ought to be scared, but no, I wasn't. I was grateful
And understand that you hold me dear to your heart.
I would always love you Alan, I would always love you Uncle.
For my favourite Uncle, Alan. Who passed on 9th March 2014. His death almost crippled my interest in everything.
What the hell is going on here?
Reading all my messages and making sure I'm faithful
Trust is something that has to be built, it's not so rare
But I honestly don't appreciate this, if I say what's on my mind you'll drool.
sigh

I wish I wasn't writing this
I had something else to say, but
Yesterday turned into Tomorrow
and I'm reluctant to come and play

I don't usually explain my Poetry
but I no longer have 'the gift'
No longer have I the emotions
Eternal despair has caused a rift

so I'll whisper my meanings to you
all my words mean nothing to me
just what I gathered from the universe
I'm an Empath, you see

I can no longer hold
all your feelings
in my heart
I can no longer
cry for you
laugh with you
or sit silently
as you fill me
with emotions
I can't cope with
I never wanted this
from the start

but I never denied you

So this is *Goodbye

let go of my hand
unwrap your arms
from beneath my soul

Don't cry for me
or laugh at me
or catch your breath
or try to see
Where I'm going,
you can't follow me

My journey is ended

The price....

                    *Untold
hard to capture but easy to release.

"We all start, facing East, waiting for the Sun to touch our hearts, but eventually, some turn, facing West, waiting for nightfall, for the darkness to come, to take away the demons that have laid their heads to our breast, so we can rest." ~ Helen Doogan 28/12/2013
Lights strung above this out of place darkness
create shadows of an invisible existence
Filaments of glowing hopes and wants
droop towards empty heart beats

Alone in this overcrowded nightmare,
checking the time on faceless clocks
in no particular sequence standing
like sentries on broken boundary lines

An endless runway of lifeless orbs
dot the landscape in Morse code warnings
as I turn away in a curved defiance,
unable to accept the words touching my eyes

And still, glistening raindrops fall from overhead wires
reflecting each tear drop of prism’d descent
For even if I wake, screaming as the night disappears
she will still be gone, like every other burned out dream
Who is d only woman
The only woman' who is wht crying for
Who is d only woman
The woman who bleeds for 5days
who is d only woman
The woman who doesn't sleep until I sleep
Who is d only woman
The woman who will never abandon u

The only woman is d woman what waiting for
The woman what crying for
The woman what praying for
The woman with four sights
The woman with a difference
The woman of my dreams
You know d only woman
There is something in a moment,
That just takes your breath away.

It makes you feel excited and scarred
At the same time.
It makes you want to scream at the top
Of your lungs how happy you are.
It gives you those good and bad chills
You know,
The good when you get your first kiss
And the bad when you lose a dear friend.
Positively, both are a blessing in disguise.

It makes you look up at the sky,
And wonder how amazing everything is.

It gives you the feeling of being loved.

It makes you think.
It gives you courage.
It gives you the strength to do things,
Things you didn't think you could do.

It shows you how to believe in yourself.
It helps you,
Teaches you,
Guides you
Gives you hope,
Gives your life meaning.

All these things are great.
But it’s not about all that.

When you are in one of those moments,
Just take another moment,
You have plenty to go around
And realize, this moment,
These amazing moments are happening because,
someone is giving it to me.

Someone is giving me all these amazing moments,
Because that someone loves me enough
To want to see me happy.

There are bad moments though,
Where you just want to escape

When you do find yourself in one of these,
Do the same thing,
Take a moment,
Think,
Cry out,
And that someone will give you a beautiful moment.

He is the only thing that makes the moment,
Worth living.
Christ,

I left my head in
the haze of sweeteners

I left my stomach in
An ocean of skimmed milk

I left my faith in
Your warm embrace

I feel a unicorn's horn
Piercing an entire canyon
In my mind

If I have a third eye
Then Christ, it's calcified


(I must purge this curse
Wash it in white dye

I must revitalise
Unless I'll die)
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