When I think about his eyes,
all that pops out,
is the dreadful look
he would carry around.

Oh his beautiful eyes,
blue, with little specks of white,
The way they would wander,
From side to side.
Trying hard not to stare,
Or lock their gaze
On anything else
then the cold ground .

Because they knew,
what they had hidden
Could be easily seen,
They knew someone would notice
the sadness they had within.

None was the word
that had me breaking down,
Tears trying to leave my eyes.
One simple question
had me turn to color white,
It had me falling to the floor,
The action ending with a simple
Thud.

How could this question
Be back to haunt me again,
It replayed over and over in my head
Torturing my brain.

It was a simple question
Not even directed to me,
It was rhetorical, but even so
It made me think.

"How many people know who you really are? "
The question had me tremble
Because my answer was
"None..."

I am a shell and
I am empty and
my seams are torn and ripped and ragged
like a dagger has sliced a hurricane through my chest
and all the emotions I'm supposed to have have poured out
like honey
like water
like innocence
like red red blood that pools and drips and
streams from my wrists like
the hungry blade of nothingness like
how I felt that time I waltzed with death

but

because I am not a real person
no one cares
anyway.

I tried to be good at something
But I ended up being a noting
I was smiling
Even though I felt like crying
I felt so alone
Like I was in this all on my own
I could only hurt myself
Because there felt like nothing else
I was lying and lying
No one knew what I was hiding
I wanted to die
And no one knew why
I'll just go to bed
And hope I wake up dead

I don't want someone
So illuminated
With a bright light
Too keep me up at night

I want someone with contrast
Darkness, shadows
That makes the white whiter
And the black blacker

I want your darkness to add to my light
And my daybreak to enhance your night

I want to be your moon
With you as my sun
I ache to be your dark sky
Touched by your brilliant stars

I want someone with contrast
Darkness, shadows
That makes the white whiter
And the black blacker

I want your darkness to add to my light
And my daybreak to enhance your night

I don't need black
Or white
I need both, harmony
That you bring

I want someone with contrast
Darkness, shadows
That makes the white whiter
And the black blacker

I want your darkness to add to my light
And my daybreak to enhance your night

He felt the feelings
I cried through my songs,
So he told me to stop.
Stop hiding,  
stop crying,
stop pretending,
And start telling
Everything, from the bottom
to the top.

He listened,
he stayed,
And promised to never go away.
He was indeed a friend
You never ask for but get.

He just shows up one day,
To fix all the wreck,
To heal all your wounds,
To give you the best hugs,
And to keep your heart warm and true.