peacefulness resides within the lifetime of your eyes / sprinkle in your mind something that eats away the time / carried away by tides washed up easily in lies

i lie here thinking about you
dreaming of your return
i wish you’d give me a call, let me hear you
you’ve got me all entangled in you
a certain charm and magic to you

i want to be seen
i want to be appreciated and loved
i feel like i have so much to give
i feel like i have so much beauty gto give
i feel i have so much spirit

i want to love myself
i want to be loved
i want to feel love
i want to feel love
i want to feel love
i don't want to be invisible
i don't want to be buried
i don't want to be bruised
i don't want to be pushed away
i don't want to be thrown away
i don't want to be stepped on
i don't want to be scarred
i don't want to be unloved

i don't want to be trapped here
i want to be in his arms
and i don't want to share him
i don't want to
iwant to give him my love i want hislove
i don't wanna be sad idont wanna feel this
idont wanna cause stress i didnt mean to be a burden
i didnt mean toi didnt mean to hurt anyone
ididnt mean to be here im sorry
i dont know why im crying i dont know why im fighting
i dont know anymore i just dont know im trying to think im trying to feel
im trying to get over it im trying to let go im trying to be me

why am i here cryingagain
whyam ihere in this pain again
ive triedsohard to keep thisaway
ive tried so hard to keep it away
im trying so hard to be good
im trying to be lovable imtryingto be a kindperson
i just want acacia to be loved i want acaciato love
i wnat acacia to be in his arms i want acacia to love him and i want acacia to
be special to him i want acacia to be his favorite i want acacia to be his only
i want acacia to outshine them all for him because im his angel no one else is
i want to be  special i want this month to be over
i want to be there i wish i could deal with this sudden pain why did this happen to me why did this come why did this happen why am i down again what about me im not a bad person i promise im trying im not being bad i promise im not trying to hurt anyone i promise i just want to scream i just want to scream so loud so loud

I cried all night until there was nothing more,
what good will I do as a heap on a floor?
I will keep with my devotion, but it’s just no good
I’m taking it hard just like you knew I would
What can I do with my broken heart?
I want to piece up our puzzle because you’re my missing part,
I’ll do whatever I can to fix our broken hearts

Using tape and glue and soldering us together,
There’s nothing broken that can’t be fixed: cried in my chest and whispered that I could fix you,
With all my tools, I’ll fix your broken self, with all my tools I’ll fix my broken heart

he was right: he says those things to keep me in earth, TO KEEP ME GROUNDED RIGHT HERE NEXT TO HIM because he lets me take him into my fantasy and we play sometimes in the sea[ I am a bad a swimmer] I drown in my murky pinky green blue diminished youth ocean pool of sassarine. he watches in that way he does and with a smile on his face, somewhat sad yet in restorative awe: thinking and knowing how beautiful I am in here in the ocean whereabout the dolphins and coral, he prefers my beauty in the thunderous tender sunlight: takes me by the waist and pulls me by our center of gravity between the thinly veiled force, to surface for air and the wind and sun: pressure grips yet melts away as we float in the seafoam towards the shore. no longer is the shore the enemy, as the shore is our home. and we willywally the way to our high: the ocean being the home of many and us, and the shore being the home of one and us.

broken pieces kick you in the eyes
seems like once again there is a mission
devalued, long vowels rest between my thighs
deeply longly evaluate the meaning of these
words and haikus that you breathe

"You've been surrounded by people who don't care your whole life; why put me in that box?" Perhaps it hurt him that I said he didn't love me, questioned why he cared. I am silent for a few seconds. "I don't know," I croak this. "Habit, I guess." He's silent. He begins his work.

Something echoes as he sips his coffee. Mind must prepare for work: he must do his best. I shouldn't bother him. He can set this aside for another time, set me aside for later. That is what the healthy-minded ones must do. I caress his boundaries and hold them gingerly. I replay his voice and his stone-set tone. My throat dry and his throat wet. Clicks and types. Earlier he said he was going to be able to look at me, look at me in my eyes. His voice is serious now; in that same direct melody he sings when he dislikes something. The sound of curtail. His tone was cut-short but the hoarseness and fumes of scars lingered as hot breaths that clung for an answer with each word.

I fluff my hand on my chest, on and inside my chin: resting my warm chin on my warm hand: clammy eyes and softer sighs (you will). One at a time; what is mine I want to be yours; one at a time, the cool reacting with the warm.

//  / //  LEAVE YOUR PASSIONS TO THE WORLD /// YOUR PASSIONS ARE OF THIS WORLD / MY PASSIONS ARE OF THIS WORLD   / / / I MUST BE ALIEN TO THIS WORLD / / / I MUST BE OF THE UTMOST HIGH /  / /  /

this holy suicide advocated through those dreams /
they are choices made upon passions / passion for the World, passion for the State /
it is a decision made with passion /
you leave your passions in the world: the choice to die , is a choice of passion no matter how much you have desensitized your senses /
the choice to indulge , is a choice of passion no matter how much you have desensitized your senses /
you must Experience. /
this is not your life to give, this is not your death to take. /
this is not your body  . this is not You. /

you are not your 'possessions'  , you are not your rents. your lots and temporary positions. are you your titles? are your your adjectives? are you the Language, the Symbolic words that compile our human reality and perception? are you what you see? are you the pain of the World? are you those joyous fears? are you the trembling at night? are you the happiness? are you the mercurial waves? are you the dreams you aspire? are you the things you hate? are you the things you love? are you the way you do things? are you your thoughts? that thought you had a few minutes ago . .  . was that You? or i mean, Is that You? who are You? what are You?  /

these moments of silence breathe into me , and i know this when i am not speaking. the thoughts that come to me and pour into me ; i know this is not me when i speak : a source plugged into , and i'm not sure how i did . . . much love to you, my sweet baby . . . my brethren ... much love to you, my boy. my sweet sweet boy.

//  / //  LEAVE YOUR PASSIONS TO THE WORLD /// YOUR PASSIONS ARE OF THIS WORLD / MY PASSIONS ARE OF THIS WORLD   / / / I MUST BE ALIEN TO THIS WORLD / / / I MUST BE OF THE UTMOST HIGH /  / /  /
// / / / / but my soul belongs to you
and everything i do
/// / /  / / / / / / / /

this was the moment I was reminded he's a man still
a human man and no different than anyone else
all dust, all of them
all dirt, all of them
all belonging to the Earth
my presence and Beauty [with a capital B, not a lowly low b]
will be taken from him
as a punishment
it's what's necessary

He never lets me in
and when I sneak inside at night
and his eyes are open when he
sleeps because he is paranoid
and a light sleeper; I take the knife and hide it behind my back
do you see me now?can you see me in this light?is it the light too dark?
but when I hear a little laugh from the window-side,
and a figure running by the closet: panic hides in my chest,
and time seems frozen forever, waiting for the moment to pass: sugar creeps from his sleeping eyes,
roused to livelihood and dewdrops dribble down his chin:
creeping away, I run, faster than before:
I did this only so I could come inside whenever I wanted
but he's no longer home
I gain traction and my scarf covers my ears
temples sweat with isolated rivers down my cheeks, onto my chin, chinstrapping as it flows to my belly button
only to collapse beneath me, my knees sink into rocks embedded in concrete: her colorful hair whirs in my sight, )he was never home)
now I'm scared—does someone understand how hard it is when you're running this fast to find someone to hold your hand
and her mischievous grin kisses me on my open mouth,
licks my tongue with his, and on hers, she licks me everywhere
kissing me and hugging me and feeling every bit of lust I could never think that I had before:

whenever he’d beam me: take a rest and look at that — doesn’t the sun hit so settling when it shines like that? when you sparkle like that? yes, never stop dreaming: you’d never know, don’t look away — bring it possibly into the shack, complimentary dreamjournal. the sound got lost back then/stethoscope close up to your heart\it smelled cold and the rain fell through the tunnel at the end; read a book about the eardrums all alone, feel the hair grow between your thumb and your toes, your hearing is better than your sight since yesterday

the truth fell in my hands
from capping off the jar
pour into my bowl
go remove oneself is to prove happiness for the other
a step shown
here you have the right path not set in front of you

i know the imagination and where it goes
the way you imagine
the forms
have a happy life

the music sings gently
my heart will never know
the fall it goes
to take a jump
my heart will sing a song
and in this song it has to know
i have to let it go
just let it go
let this go
must let it go

Here it became once again I’m lost
feeling like a sheep who has been sheared
in November rain, naked and hurt inside
there’s a little girl who lays inside of me
I hope that she gets the chance to be
expressed and come out happily
but when she shines out she is met with
criticisms, and heartbreak,
she is told to grow up and leave.
Won’t you let it be that me and her can be
accepted happily, treated properly?
Can she come out so she can heal?
I know I am no child but she inside is
please treat her as one, treat her gingerly
she’s fragile and delicate, sometimes
it looks as if no one understands

I forgot the way the damp Flemish heat sticks to my skin,
the tossing and turning and half draped blankets in a warm night next to a warm man whose chest rises and falls slowly and deeply and steadily in a deep sleep,
my heart and ***** swells with a soft and settled joy, yet balloons my eyes with a lip licking lust — a lean man, thin legs and arms with the right hints of muscle definition, a strong and defined jaw : his nose, perfect; just how I’ve dreamed of a man since girlhood, and I have a man from my stories, from my dreams, showing me the world and filling me up to the brim with his love —
a honey man, a Taurean man, a man of Venus …

my husband.

the mind thinks, the body moves, but I observe: to be aware of the Observance, the mind and the body must both be aligned; once the mind and the body have performed yoga, they contemplate on the Observer—it has become Two things: the Observer and the Observed. this the Archdualism, the Observed the Angra, and the Observer the Spenta. there has been a Synthesis. the union of the mind and the body (the Bind) and the Presence has integrated, an integral yoga.

I cry out in a simple song;
sugar, rest in peace behind my tomb
something in this new place
puts me into a new pond
and I sit in white and blue
hoping you'd wake up and find me
perched perfectly on our sofa
not sleeping though I should
and you bring me back to bed sternly but sleepily
hold me because you think I am too damaged for this world
make me your treasure, please treat me like your own
keep caring: I sleep with a teddy bear
my hair is big inside of this 19th-century building
my lips glazed, my skin supple
my bottom filling out white underwear
my ******* fall naturally in sky blue
don't you see the wounded goddess in me?
I look back to the door longingly
when could he come to me
touch me with his gentle hands
wrap his skinny arms around me
my head resting in his chest
I pulled myself regrettingly from his arms
in a bout of negativity
only to hold myself up
alone in the living room
feeling like the angel I've always been

he looked at me with stern eyes,
the first man to stay with me while I grow up,
the first man who looked at me in my eyes and said,
"Babies need to grow up too," and he said it to me with fatherly eyes
and soft kisses and a stern holding hand, not leaving my side and holding me as
I bloom towards the sun and sky, tells me he is always my daddy and he is always going to love me
like a father does, but I must continue to grow. He wants to love me and nurture me, he is tending to me, I see it:
it's blossoming, his love, he did it, today, he has finally shown me his fatherly love, his husbandly love, he's done it, and now I know it,
now I see it, I know, you, I see you.

My birthday is coming up, and he wants to see me grow. Sorry, don't take it the wrong way. You are the only one who has ever encouraged my growth, who has never held me back.

my heart pounds and stinging tears
how can you deny me? how dare you?
do you know who the **** I am?
how could he say this? how could he act like this?
why have I been placed with these beings who don't know
ideality in front of them?
they've all gone mad! why would he kiss me with such weighted words only to step back when I kiss back? is this how he flirts?
why **** me only to cry? I want to smash the doors and shut the world outside
all for a measly few dollar bills

Just enough buzz and a tip to get me to start freaking working

How did he know to make feel like this? How did he touch me so instantly?

Love put him and me in a hypnagogic state --- how is he this wicked? How did he make this a dream?

He didn't laugh, and we loved it; our nectar is on us:
I long for the day where I'll cling to him . . .

I'm a mess and he knows it; I'm in love and don't I show it:
like a babe in arms . . .

He makes me feel like a flourishing forest; and he tastes colors because of me . . . I'll worship the flesh that clings to him.

depth written in these bones: to the marrow and the core: here I am to unroll it, unwrap our Christsmas gifts;

I feel naked and I let you do things to me astrally: the spirits saw, and the spirits I saw were because of your energies that are beautiful: the spirits I saw were beautiful and attracted to our astral sweat . . . the moving silhouettes were visionary to your ***, visionary to your love . . .

dare I really say, we engaged in astral *** . . . may we now roll under water and dive once more?

why do i bother talking!
i’m always wrong anyway, i’ll be quiet!
distance myself from it all: i got comfortable way too quickly

how are you so gentle? how can you hold me so? how come you haven't let go? why do you kiss me so tenderly? hold me so tenderly?

ok my heart was thrown in the trash
too good to be true
i thought you were a person who wouldn't give up halfway through

i told myself you’d be gone by midnight,

but there you were in my arms in the dim light

casting shadows on to my shadowed body, with white seas (velour and micro) , that manage we manage to swim through, through into the forest where we’ve climbed the boterbergen, climbing over electric fenses, on the heide and in the way, the wind pulled and came to, us and held us in its palm as it guided us to the sprinkled heart in the middle of the heide:

love in the castle, screams of terror, kisses under the sun: trekking up the viewing tower, we saw the trees dance with us, with the wind and under the wind, your soul vibrates, electrically, signs of Him, the Kabouter Koning, in the forest: he gave us a blessing for our love, he gave us his blessing, he gave our love his blessing

you stayed at midnight, you stayed the rest of my life

there are frogs in my throat
bees in my hair
brine in my eyes
wherever the tide takes me
I run away into these pools
mossy returns and powerful hues
I’m no one’s daughter

my heart aches
to be seen in that lens
to be loved in that way
can't I be both? can I fill both roles in your life?
can I do both of them? please?

I want to feel his lips on my cheek running towards my jaw closed eyes and pawing at my body  it's over too soon the heat from his body I crave say my name the way you do say it how you do I only care about how you say it I only love the way you say my name

I wonder of your delicate love,
your seaside breeze and your oven-bread warmth
the webbings of your patterns and never-ending summertime calm;
is this a myth of your being?
astromes etched in stone—
wrapping in ebony, a greenery worth silvers and you prefer bitter chocolate—
sweep me delirious within your sweet hold
beloved, my swall man, asleep in the oceaan:
all night I watched him, embroidered within the kelp of nature; my words in his mind, pink dust of my love settling,
this manifests as morning sand in the corners of his eyes
a sigh of morning relief, come through my kisses in the night
I stay between his legs, mouth, and flower held tight onto his manhood: my soft ******* lips
Italy can wait, for now, we stay in bed

it’s so embarrassing my face
do you dislike it, too?

I came to earth
from a cloud
delivered by a stork
please, know this,
I am not from here

and acacia curled up
and she cried
she grabbed her teddy bear
and into the soft brown fur
she cried into her own soft brown fur
and with the soft brown fur
tried to forget the blurry eyes
the clammy hands
the smells and the feels
but the smell became strong
and the memory of the touch became strong
and the way the wetness came out
and the way the ******* tingled
made her cry more and wished
to be removed from her body
so this no longer kept her
she touched her tongue to the ear
the furry ear of her teddy bear
and cried morning because this
is the same way it happened
why this little girl
why her, this poor angel
the poor sweet angel
curled up in a whisper
tears slowly falling and
her stomach becoming slowly nauseous
and the movements and memories repeating
on her lips, past her eyes
why did my mommy do this?
why did my family hurt me this way?
her body to be innocence
****** and vulnerable
in her papa’s arms acacia is safe
little acacia, the little angel, is safe
she wept to herself
pushed fingers inside of her
begging the fingers to make her forget
but she became more prone
more vulnerable and she cried more
into her teddy bear and all her stuffies
that were always there for her
and she knows she has sunshine in her heart
it’s always there, her papa’s always there
and she longed for the nights she could
rest her head in his chest and he’s wrap
his hands and arms around her ears and forehead
the way he did — now the numbness kicks
in and she must remember there’s sunshine
in het heart, it’s always there

sweet, if you care keep us apart—
looking out the windows and blowing darts
passerby stay still as a lantern, watching over the mystic rents
bending over the whole driveway, backyard gasses fill the lane
I trusted a rat's stall, I give you my all,
I worked my way into romance
unrested and beauty, becoming moody
never the less we have our chance
taking dramatics and overreacted
over theatrics in drama class
meaning so well, the lights of the dell
between the armpits of something new
the melody fades me, life escapes me,
this song is sung under this moon  
only this moon and in this room,
these walls are who will hear me now:
the silent bombastics and medieval elastics,
all who came to feel me shout:
who came to see me out, who came by rolling clouds . . .

can't you tell me how I'm so **** the way I move my body up and down? don't you want to tell me how beautiful I am?
from your hands I could leave, wouldn't even break your heart right there, don't know if you would care, you probably wouldn't stare, what kind of point is this?

suppress intonation
heavy breathing
flushèd cheeks
eyes almost tinted muddied soil
sun light gazes over
five dimension face
lips spread apart

where is forrest gump when you need him?
glistening a pearl pine

i see colors and i see the sparkles in people's eyes
i see the curiosity of why the sky is blue
and why the ocean is so deep
i get tickled by the way the grass nestles against my ankles
i still blush at the moon
i welcome the sun when i walk
i still pick up leaves, rocks, flowers and hold
them in free wonder, examining the beauty
and spiral of nature: don't you too?
i smile and through my mouth echoes sounds
similar to a toddler who is so amazed at the world around them
and still i find comfort in rolling around on
a fuzzy carpet on a floor, freeing and free
while i roll on blankets and become wide-eyed
at the bluejay i saw once again. i love the colors
that rotate on my ceiling and wall; i feel
free within the confines of these four walls
because i can be free inside and outside
i feel free from those things outside, i feel
apart of every mountain, sea, and shore
the stomach pains and the body aches
are the same when the rain comes
and when the wind blows
and when flowers die and grow
still, i am free, free, free
always free, i am always free
the satin of my pillow the feel of water
free in my mind mind and heart
and when i am myself, curious
and soaked in colors, i am free from here

and within my mind
drifting by a lake , my eyes began to pool , and the lake dried up away , sometime by the night I had fell asleep ,
and I woke up to see a piece of his hair faltering as a feather would

he was here , his symbol , his him , he was here at night
kissing me on my cheek , thinking of me , his little starlet
he strokes my head tenderly       ,

he sat on the sea
with his sailing hips
his eyes began to rain
and his lips began to whip
i felt his nose dip
we were going down
until i used our lifeboat
so we wouldn't drown

similar to me living between
delight and doom
waiting for the moment
of the moon to capture me in the right light
to glow in the depths of your unconscious mind
hoping you'd see me there
when the beat switches to night
when the moment switches to your mind's eye
willfully I make my face appear in a blue light
electric blue outline of me in your mind
in those eyes
shining in the dark
abstract ****** expressions abstruse limbic gestures
bouncing in a slowly motion
atmospheric dancing so your hairs rise gently on arms
so your  blue vein throb and blood rushes to your cheeks
so your heart beats faster when your mouth cups on its own
holding the indigo blue lines drooling from my silhouette
in your mind's eye, you hold me
and no one else—
in the daytime when the melody switches to light
the blue memory of me crept from your subconscious
is pulled back into the dark by a mystery force
and your eyes blink heavily and a conscious thought
of my brownness befalls onto you
natural and easy it seemed, wanting to recall the events of the night
the experience of the nighttime *****
the angel in your night
but nothing comes to light

this can't hurt me anymore
I detach and I dump in the fire
watch something like what could have been into flames
ashes that become compressed into vocabulary
comfortability
within possibilities: an Italian man, young and raw for me
I'm immune he can get no colder
The stiff ways of your eyes fixated on a hungry raw younger lovely
things but something you will miss out on a gem and diamond like this way
light the way, Oh! heed the way: before the mongrels like you *****: do you see things I do? are you missing out yet? I'll make you regret it: I wrote it
Leave me alone you're a liar: forgetter, mongrel, nothing more to you: you're a dime a dozen like the rest: my idealism has faded

these are the moments you don't tell anyone about
you can't tell anyone about
the moments where you no longer become understood
and you're innermost desire becomes just a desire
just something unreachable
when sometimes people say you are deserving
and other times people say you are not
when someones you say you are deserving
and other times you say you are not
situations wehre  am stuck,
where I'd like the warm patience I once heard again
the situations I can't speak about
when the answer from the world is to be on your own
when longing for care is no longer an option
things become blurred when I feel this way
because somehow the hope and belief I had falters
the wish that I could be held gingerly, be held gently
so I can be tough on myself comes to ruins
and once again, I must be the only one to care for myself
to be kind to myself
to be sweet to myself
when in my head I see the logical conclusions
of how material life is easier for my loves without me
these are the thoughts I dare not speak often
where I know my nonexistence makes it easier for others
I know the sun moves on and others still live and die with or without me
I know things would be much different without me
for them and maybe for me
these moments where if my loves were to see me
think pitiful pathetic things
if they were to read these things
think pitiful and pathetic things of me
no one lovable anymore
these situations must not arise to the ones I love
I am no one's daughter
I am no one's lover
I am no one's friend
I am no one's burden
I am no one's responsibility

my eyes are puffy, Summer Rain: and all night i stayed wide awake
red rage, moans and groan, blue cries
groans and moan, pink haze
moans and groan, rock hard love
the way things were like a breeze and suddenly the summer ended sadly, in Medellin:
sei la mia musa, a dopo mi amore . . . ci vediamo dopo, amore mia

and it all dwindles
Grazing the blades with ivory teeth but barely scraping Earth
dawns a green vortex in the closest plane above
slowly chewing, slowly disintegrating
warps over itself and collapses itself and expands itself
mundanity glazes the jaded eyes to a point of exhaustion
complacent with the ever-still repeating pattern
self-same chain of events
comfortable with the hearse given
white skin black spots
can't differentiate the wind-cry from the tide
the failure of an engine mocks the baby's cry
shards stuck in between low-waisted teeth, nostrils flare
sounds ****** into mutating isolation
lightwaves becoming visible with the waves of light
no flinch, no wince, no care
ground fractures and breaks down into smaller and smaller pieces of dust
until the smaller pieces of dust turn so small
their trace is still there
another self-sustaining loop parallels the vortex and another one conjoins the two
seemingly being behind the first one and coming in the rear-end of the second one
no sound, no movement, no care
pieces of sky drop into each one and the time to think dwindles
into meaningless expressions that trail into nothing more than an idea to transfer the idea to a reachable adequate physicality

this is so embarrassing
now i can't even dare to look near him
i'm so ashamed to be like this
i put my head down to cry, and i will accept this inner lonely feeling
i'll take this advice: i'll spend some time away, some time alone again
i know the problem is me, but i need to cut the vines from them
selfish of me to burden others with my chaotic dealings
maybe i share too much: no one they need to know those hard sad feelings, alone again
i'll stay alone then, i'll sit outside in the sun with my sweet plant
they can handle it / i will not harm them by giving to them my dealings
if people i must hide from, the sun i cannot in nature i can confide

and i need to remain a level of detachment to get through these

i throw away all my stuffies

purple dress does a singing see-saw set
and the hair glistens in the dim lighted and the club raves
with her bottom swinging near low
and her skin drinks the applause, no pulse-pulse, fast pulse-pulse, low heart-rate and soft smiles and clouded-daisied eyes: slack jawed, and gripping, primal energy : thrusting pausing: pawing and groping, prodding and packing
there are no facades in this dark
with the ice on her because her man used to have a cold heart
and he opened it up with his bank account for her
and for him she made the leather skin clap,
with the rover that dragged them to this party tonight
he stood in the background and his gold chain
spanking in the sweat, marinating because in his mind
he says he likes the way she dances
within the crowd on the floor in those heels,
those clear heels, those long heels, that makes her almost
his height heels, with her hair out and her body out heel-heels:
swinging near the people in the terminal,
and he keeps on her the go-go: somewhere near the wall
and she falls up: glitter glancing like the edge of a knife
nothing on her deep like a cut
falling off her
and inside there's something dark
when their diamonds shine in the dark
it illuminates the distance
he closes the distance
her heels ebb and wave towards him and her body
dances towards him with her ******* smiling
towards him and he glistens back
booming thugs into his ear, with the volume
only becoming louder
something nothing to get relief for
a tempo: high fashion: tempo, keep the temperature:
the rolling hips against the satin blue
ocean; to swallow his saliva, with his tongue in her mouth
bringing the body to the floor low floor, high buildings, and caved in followers
she locks eyes, he tastes her bottom cake,
and she calls herself his beauty babe,
as much as he loves when she is the top babe,
he keeps her as his bottom babe
because he loves to look her in the face
when he ***** her through the night and day:
twisted popped beat, fasting spinning mace:
wanting to devour cake, he wants her to be okay
blessed in the presence with grace
smoke flowed around didn't leave a trace

i’m feeling trapped, alone, and weak
i cry by myself because the noise made me
in such distress, i felt myself leave my body
to escape the crowd and noise
and just shut down from the world
i want tenderness and someone to understand and to kiss me gently with protection until it goes away
tell me it’s all better until it’s all okay

men ain't ****!
look at what you did
I hope you see this
listen when I say
you ain't ****!