I sit in a room and imagine the thousands of eyes staring at me judging.
Yet I sit in a room that's empty.
I worry about everything that I'm going to come in contact today.
Yet I won't even leave my house.
I think about how bad the conversations with you would go.
Yet I refuse to even pick up my phone to text you.

Every night I had when I was younger
I would pray for it to end, not to get stronger
I regret every one of those thoughts
If one time it had come true
I would have never met you
You came through out of the blue
And had me lost standing, there didn’t have a clue
What on earth you could do
Not once did I expect you to enter and renew
Everything that had expired in my heart
You entered and you became a part
We can’t ever be apart

Flesh on flesh to fingers on glass.
No longer do I say the words.
Instead the text I type tells you that “I love you.”
The evolution of emotion.
The technologicalization of the hearts fuel,
Makes the organic feel no longer relevant.
No longer do my lips show my expression.
Instead all I give is a kiss from my thumb.
    *
So far away, but my presence lingers in an invisible stream.
Like a ghost I am with you.
Travelling through the waves.
A tower, our connector.  
We love in the age of the screen,
The age of the machine.
   *
Love now feels so solitary.
My heart no longer beats against your own.
Instead the buzzing of vibration beckons my digitized feelings.
I now find myself romancing alone,
Romancing the phone.

Her favorite dress
hangs in her closet.
Just like her head
hangs to watch the floor.
The dress sparkles, and
her eyes used to shine
just as bright.
She no longer wears it
in fear that you’ll
be looking up or down it.
She’ll be taken advantage of
one more time
before she says
her final goodbyes.

It haunts us, we are scared of it.
But we spend a lot of time thinking about it.
We walk around wanting it.
It drives us, makes us passionate.
Ditch everything we know just to chase it.
Wake up the next morning hoping to revisit.

It is different for each person, and we try to make the most of it.
Next year we make a bunch of promises, and swear to it.
No more this, no more that, but more of it.
Finally be the person we want to be, get really fit.
Time passes by, we forget it.
Maybe next year we will regret it.

Once you look around, you will remember it.
Slow things down, take a glance, it will hit.
Every second counts, do not ever quit.
You only get it once, before you split.

It is called life, cherish it.

(explicit)

**** my soul
        with poetry
           scream out my gracious name
             slay me with words
               that peel my layers
                and simultaneously
                                   drive me
                                           insane

finger me slowly, hotly
with just the right rhythm and rhyme
    push me past my
                 tender limits
                       into tongues of syntax,
                                                      sublime

a­lliterate my senses
   (in swift stac
                    c-at
                           o)
until my mind is but blank verse
    mess up my stressed
              and unstressed syllables
in unsung language, versed

I will speak to you in vowels
(the only sound
       I will be able to make)
as you stroke
   my iambic pentameter
             in the heat of frothed-up
                                                     ache

we are this heroic couplet, you see
        even if the meaning seems veiled
           no need for simile or metaphor
               as I feel your chest rise
                              in deep inhale

we are a natural paradox
       so many ironies abound
         discordant harmony
is our synaesthesia
     in visible darkness found

and I love this delicious enjambment
as your aura invisibly slips
                               into mine
our lines have no beginning,
                                 no end
    as we undo
          the boundaries
                      of time

sometimes when i sit in my room
drowning in a river of tears
that fall for so many reasons that
i cannot think of just one
i wish you would come in
i wish you would knock on my door
and ask me if i’m okay
because then i could let it all out
i could lean my head on your shoulder
and soak it completely while you
rub my back and let me cry
no judgements
no questions
you would just sit there and hold me
and tell me everything will work out
somehow
something as simple as this can
make me feel a whole lot better
because that is the kind of connection
you have with me
one that is simple
and one that is strong

She shares her name with a flower
Together I hope we bloom
Come lay with me and I promise
To hold you from dusk until noon
My life was feeling cloudy
Until I met you
My world was so dark
But you give it a whole other hue

For the first time you hit me.
2. For the second time I cut.
3. For the third time he ***** me.
4. For the fourth time I wished myself dead.
5. For the fifth time I lost a friend.
6. For the sixth time I cried.
7. For the seventh time I failed that class.
8. For the eighth time you called me that name.
9. For the ninth time I refused to eat.
10. For the tenth time I tried to **** me.