Again, tonight I occupy a lonely and cold corner of the bed.
So many heart felt memories for so many years,
But as cruel as the winter wind,
the love
the affection
the prolonged attention,
have brought with them an unwelcoming splinter of animosity.
It is with love that you wield the sword
your powerful beauty has me floored,
shaking in my skin, afraid of the outside.
Thoughts of others, laid to rest,
burdens lay heavy upon my chest
no more to sleep, just laying awake
awaiting the battle,
the battle of another day with its silent scream.
The cold distance demands
my arrow has been shot down
sweet goodnights are now no more

I'm so far inside myself
Starting to feel like someone else
Getting lost in the dreams
Of the girl in mirror
That I can no longer see
She's beginning to scare me
And it seems like my mind
Is her favorite flavor of coffee
She drinks up my thoughts
And gets a rush of energy
All I can feel for her is envy
Yet, she's supposed to be inspiring
And me? I'm practically dying
Just waiting for the mood to strike
Finding the right music to surround me
It's tiring and
I've been living life so patiently
Feeling like
It's starting to get to me
Breaking the mirror inside my eyes
Does nothing
Neither does smoking out my mind
She just seems to soak it all in
Breathing in the fumes of my coffee
Giving me nothing but an empty space
And my face
Is just her face, minus the evil grin
I can't even begin
My muse is addicted
Trying to get her on the mend
Find the fix she needs
So this beginning
Doesn't start with the end

My coat is black
like the nights
I have long forgotten.

I left heaven
for the taverns.

I did my readings before daybreak
when the moon was far aloft,
but the nights got longer.

I kept putting things off
hoping I would discover a star
I knew was there.

Now I saw logs
and leave the leaves
where they fall.

Last night I went to sleep and I began to dream. My spirit left my body and crossed beyond the veil of time. I watched the old world pass and saw a light that was brighter than the sun. I stepped onto a street and everything was clean. The air was clear and I could see all of the stars. I looked into a window and saw a video screen. What was being talked about I could not believe. There were no reports of ******, nor was there any war, only images from people living on Mars. I saw children playing and having a parade. It seemed unreal to me. Then I looked around and saw the city lights, I jumped up and took my spirit took flight. I looked over the earth and saw how it was lush and green. I didn't see any factories spewing out pollution. I looked for a hospital, but one could not be found. I only found a small building where people are healed for free. I watched and listened and found what amazing thing had been done. Science had accomplished the impossible, all sickness was all but gone .In a moment I felt myself being pulled back to where I was asleep. I woke up and felt so empty. I wanted to go back to what I had seen. I then realized that the world I saw was yet possible and tomorrow would begin with me.

I was scared.
People around me noticed it.
They told me to try going out of my comfort zone.
To step outside the box.
I was scared.
But I gave a shot.
Now Im outside the box.
Wondering my existence.
Roaming around at every corner.
I was scared.
One wrong move
I might fail.
But I realized
I wasnt scared.
It's just in my head.
Because everything outside the box was
All my happiness.
I was once afraid of risking.

You asked me
If what makes me happy and sad.
I just laughed
Because you'll never know that
It's always been you.


You.

This is never how I planned to spend my youth
Locked in my own fears and shackled to your dirt
Forced to live in (y)our constant mess
Afraid is judgement, yes, but fearing death by your breath
And shaking in your bones and your pine
I twist and turn my aching spine just to catch a glimpse
A glimpse of life outside of these walls a life filled with laughs and falls
But the happiness made up for the scrapes and bruises
While all I had was broken promises
Lost without a will to live I slowly climbed
Reaching higher heights than I've ever seen
I escaped your grasp to land on my feet
And though I'm certainly lonely I'm most certainly not alone
And even though I don't have a being beside me
And I don't have someone to think of before I go to sleep
I now dream of better things.

Things much bigger than you've ever seen.