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Chwins Feb 2018
It's flying without wings,
And falling when you didn't jump.
It's getting hit by a freight train,
When you weren't even standing on the tracks.

Some say it's a feeling,
Others seal it with a kiss;
It's a language you never knew you could speak,
When you two started talking.
It's dreading the end
When you haven't even started.
It's drowning and floating at the same time,
Except you don't find yourself in the water.
Chwins Feb 2018
In, out, in, out
It burns.
Lungs are on fire,
Every breath hurts.

I run and I don't stop
Pounding on the pavement.
With every gulp of air
Somehow falling short.

I scream and I don't stop
Walls echoing in disdain.
In, out, in, out
I breathe in vain.

In, out, in out;
Life goes on.
Chwins Feb 2018
Stop chasing that dream
Said the devil in my ear
Today I quash him
Chwins Jan 2018
You are beautiful,
You are strong,
You are more than the blade you're holding against your wrist.
So drop it.

You are more than those *******' whispers
and those ***** catcalls.
Don't ever doubt your worth
Because you are better than the picture you've painted in your head.

You are the best version of yourself
And now is the time of your life.
Get out there, set yourself free
Unshackle your feet from the chains that drag you down.

You are beautiful and you are not alone.
Chwins Jan 2018
It claws at my neck
Chokes me til I'm breathless
This invisible force
I dare not speak of to anyone else

My heart starts to pound
My breathing accelerates
My vision begins to blur
My sweat turns cold as ever

And just as I'm about to hit the ground
It retreats and recedes like a coward
Dear anxiety,
These panic attacks are getting old.
Chwins Jan 2018
Today I heard a lady say that it takes two
To make something matter nothing.
And from the recesses of my mind, a question:
When did I cease to matter to you?
I must have played a role in our demise
Even when I wasn't aware it was happening.
Chwins Jan 2018
How do you deal with beseeching eyes
Not quite begging you to stay,
But silently asking you not to leave?
Do you just walk away?

How do you leave something you’ve grown to love?
Do you just fade into the background?
Or do you foster relationships
And play lost and found?

Many a fool has done it
Or are they actually smarter than me?
If I ask them how they did it,
Will they say it was easy?

Is it more painful to be left behind,
Or to be the one who walks away?
But how do you walk away
When every fiber of your being wants to stay?
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