The person I was,
The person I want
Every morning I shed my skin.
A snake whose scales alter constantly.
The most powerful revolution I've witness has been that of the individual because that causes a chain reaction like no other. I love to see the naked human, the untouched by society human, the true human, be that.
Life is creation, if you look close enough you can even find it in cemeteries.
The promises you have avoided every new year, make them a reality this time around. Its a fresh start, wiping clean the grime off the window.
Procrastination is out that window.
Priorities have entered, therefore, I must accomplish what I've been putting off for so long. A friend told me each person is destined for greatness and each year i want to remind myself of that saying. If your trying to reach above the clouds there is no looking down. Cruising through the city, rocking and a rolling completely satisfied with knowing where i am going, that's going to happen NOW.
I want to be able to breath and smile every day without a worry. These are the best years of my life and I want to keep that going.
Have you ever loved so hard, you felt a pain in your chest ?
Or were left with dried tears ?
Did you torture yourself at night wondering if they were doing the same?
What do you do when days feel like months and months feel like years?
Food starts tasting bland indicating nothing else matters.
I wanted to close the blinds during my blindness love.
Permenantly destroying our memories together and forgetting you existed
Love is a drug, it will feel like ecstasy and then you turn into a fein.
Hoping you get another fix from those sweet tender lips.
Let me show you what it's like to be me.
Step inside my wrinkled, falling apart working shoes.
Do you know what it's like to wear your beliefs on a pin, "**** The System".
Or wear a shirt with the logo "Brown Pride."
I who dresses for himself.
I who learns from every one and every book.
Opening the doors for you in each chapter and then closing them once you've read too much.
Now do you get me ? Or have you just been thinking of yourself lately ?
Biography August 30, 2016 ✍
I've given people various pieces of me.
I have come to them in different shapes and forms.
Offering help that could wipe away their pain, but when you give yourself genuinely without wanting anything back, you are drained.
And you will fall, fall into a whirlpool of uncontrollable emotion.
You swallowed their bitter secrets and now you feel hollow like an empty glass on the verge of collapse.
Skeleton bones in the closet, no, not I, I got live bodies locked in chains. In the spirit of Halloween, I'll wear a hockey mask and be that obsessed killer. Teenage kicks, listen close for the screams. ****** from neglect, ****** because of reject, ****** brought on by me always feeling depressed. You called me names, you tortured my spirit, you ****** me like the idols you worship. I've worsen since i started feeding on your hate. This is my manifesto. Are you scared? You should be. Because I won't take the ranting rambling bigotry you speak. This will be something straight out of a horror scene. The plot thickens, foreshadow what's next. If you think this story is fiction well it's not because we live in a cold world and I'm only giving you a description, a depiction of what words can do, I use mine for assistance, I learned to listen, I hope you do too, because you can create a monster with the powerful words you decide to use.
I declare rebellious action upon the evils in authority.
Strength in my voice rises like the fist I lift up in the air.
Taking a stand against the machine!
Your democracy is bomb first ask questions later.
I got the right to protest if my government becomes a failure.
If continuing poverty is progress then you must be rich.
In a country historically rooted in corruption maybe its time we change history for the better.
I ask you to show me art.
Tear the normal apart.
Weary first impressions, I want to see you fall apart.
Smeared make-up like smeared paint on the artist hand.
Let’s save time and truly start.
I have notebooks full of holes.
Little do we know until one shows.
Their insides spilling out insights.
Spark an incent, in a instance, the smoke clears the tense and suspense out of a safe room where your nature can be exposed.
A cup containing wine acts like a truth serum.
Songs meaning equal same rhythms.
Candle light dancing paradigm.
Here we will meet on the same page.
Were made to think we can’t express how we feel.
I howl at the moon while tossing a bottle at a police car.
I scream my lungs out on top of a hill for the world to know I’m real.
Tell me I’m worthless, play with my emotions, **** what makes me, me.
Perfect! I’ll use that as strength to make beautiful poetry.
See I turn negativity into positivity. Ugly into beautiful. Hurtful into hopeful.
My homeland is poverty rooted by racial diversity but if the people united we could create a better community.
Guns are directed on neighbors because their flag represents a different set, yet every man bleeds red except for the politicians they bleed out greed.
I know I can inspire more MC’s, writers, artist, musicians and straight passionate people if given the opportunity instead our so called hip-hop creates more plain generic and unrepresented music for our peeps.
I’m not saying hip-hop is dead I’m saying the music industry controls everything.
I walked through flames and came out burned. Avalanches covered my body and I still came out warm thanks to what I past learned.
The pain hurts but I rather go through it than be sedated.
I rather continue to spread compassion than have it be taken.
We exist in difficult times.
When we have to choose between Them or They but we can't choose Us, this is a forced vote.
Our Nation and Government divided.
The media incredibly controlling.
We've let our thinking be shaped.
******* the sun because of a Hillary mountain.
We can not find love in politics.
Only hate and war.
Please look within your heart and soul.
This is a struggle for a new civil rights movement and a fair and equal government.
We are making America hate again, even though we know this country was also build by immigrants.
My throat blows out fire.
You can't stop this sun burning in my lungs.
There's a light at the end of the tunnel.
A dragon lurking through the shadows.
Enter the unknown and i will funnel magma into your cold lifeless body.
OH NO! my little fireflies! they want to capture you in a bottle!
But the blood of the dragon in you melts the glass that held you.
We have become the mythical creatures they thought only existed in their imagination.
And now the power we've withheld for so long has got them running.
Running into the silent caves, waiting to be saved.
They fear what they not know.
I will not apologize for spreading my wildfire and you shouldn't either.
I put my signature upon your lips.
Poison in our cups, I grab your hips and the fun begins.
Two maniac's carving names into each other's chest.
Your a graveyard queen and even in death we seek each other's company.
I wouldn't feel the difference between heaven and hell as long as I was with you.
You are mine and I am yours.
Two lost souls ripped apart from one another, would wonder endlessly in search of their better half.
On a vehicle bed I voyage, wearing
headphones which lead the way.
Repelling neighbors screams, these jolting sounds travel through my body, breaking locks and knots.
Unraveling the fabric across time and space.
Is there anybody out there that feels the music flow sensitively ?
I enter myself more deeply, I lose myself to the voices and words of chemistry.
I lay in ecstasy frequencies.
Becoming one with musical melodies.
So numb I feel like chewed up gum.
Turning into the black blown out smoke from my lungs. Reduced life span, who knows when it could be done. So how much do you value life ? Will you leave the city's cage and go on the run, chasing the sunset, drunk of ***, in search of love. Some choose money as the total sum of success. It is too easy of a hunt. I'm embarking on an expedition to uncover the mystery of total freedom. To put it bluntly, I will never slow down like a slug. You can't hold me down until I've found my treasure hidden somewhere on this globe. One day i'll disappear and become unknown. Because birds leave the nest and my turn is next.
Fights break out within every person.
Everyone has a battle they need to win.
Overcoming trials and tribulations;
It is hard to lose a loved one or to get rid of a traumatizing memory.
Some are running, some have stood their ground and some have lost their way.
I remember this when I smile, I remember this when I bring joy into people's day or inspire them to try something new and tell them to stay positive.
Because I've been there too.
And I don't want you to fight this battle alone like I did.
Until she came along and saved me with a smile and began to believe in me.
The dance floor burned bright red when you stepped on it.
I could feel the heat a mile away.
Our eyes met in between the other dancers.
She moved with every song in perfect sync.
The freedom in her steps were clear.
Our hands reached for the sky as the clock stopped and our lives became eternal.
It feels good to be alive and with people who came out to do the same.
Butterflies coming out of their cocoons, celebrating under a new blue moon.
Wish I was a more confident romeo or I would have been dancing next to you.
I love to make someones day.
Let loose! Let loose! I say.
Choosing inspirational words i can make the stress go away.
Tonight is your night, the drinks I will pay.
Dress up in our finest clothes, kings and queens toast like a parade.
There is a party and everyone is going in the city of L.A.
A brother asked me "show me your best dance move" and I said okay.
And like an energetic crescent moon I changed the tidal waves with one move.
Just for you.
Because the good times roll when everyone can celebrate and no one hates.
I spent dreams waiting in vain.
I should have taken action.
Forgive thyself, for not being more impatient.
First try at a haiku.
The blue waves full of life carried me into the sky. Washed sins purified. Creativity omnipresent, burst within me into a thousand sparkling crystals. Freedom arose as i flowed within all. A moving cloud collects every piece and forms a drop of holy water.
Now I fall, in the sea of love.
The sun shines down on me revealing the once hidden colors of my aura. Brightening the horizon to its most beautiful extent. Darkness will never again torment. The heaven created in my name. Swimming with the dreams and wishes I claim. Infinite enlargement of the heart. An art that represents my utopia. I shared a vision with an artist, who related with my soul but took the drawing role.
- Christian Ek
I wrote this poem for a painting, Haven by Vladimir Kush
Its your smile that melts the snow off my cold shoulders.
It’s a warmth you can spend hours in.
All light makes its way to your cherry lips and
I would gladly burn my own in order to get close enough to make an eclipse.
It took one smile and I was hook.
I needed a daily dose like my morning coffee or
else my day wouldn’t feel improved.
Your a jaw breaker candy because you dropped my jaw.
My head spinned back like an owl as you circled me.
Long nails tingling down my spine.
A voice that could ****** any wild animal into submission.
Her body heat made me sweat.
Her intimidating attitude was ****.
Her reading glasses foggy.
Her coffee breath wasn't off putting but rather enticing.
She was a blue moon and i was howling for her, I was bound by her power.
You think you know what it's like to give up your heart completely?
To drink your heart break into a shattered glass with your blood & tears?
I blamed myself, I didn't think I was good enough, I was hateful of myself.
**** me, *******, **** everything.
Tears dripping on my pillow like a broken dream.
****, I fought people thinking that it would fix my pain.
Knuckles feigning to fight.
All the times I texted, called, voice mailed, and messaged and nothing.
You don't know pain.
You don't know Johnny Cash "hurt".
The past haunts me like a ghost and it won't let go.
Learn to let go
Tender touching on creamy silky skin.
Hearts pounding like jackhammers.
Sweat dripping, warm rain.
70,80,90,100 degrees celsius!!!
Pulses rising,voices rising, music rising.
White rose moving down your spine tingling your sensitive senses.
Oh how you sing my name, I hope this song never ends.
Loss of air, loss of sense of self, two bodies in one.
Rose pedals broken under two lovers forms.
Waking up in a rose garden to the sound of your voice.
In the secret alley of Culver City, i saw a painting of my Mexican American culture being celebrated.
The lights in the secret city sparkled like champagne bubbles.
Flowing with the city's energy our legs carried us around "No Trespassers Allowed" private properties.
I imagined a life were we could walk the streets and not feel paranoid by each car that passed.
The ideal fast food American City where there's bars and restaurants on every corner.
The alley took me into hyperreality, for what is real for me might be false for others and vice versa.
Caramel skin that got painted on by the needle.
You are inked from head to toe.
Art done to you by different hands, they must have felt privileged to touch such a tender canvas.
Like the butterfly on your stomach, you have transformed, tattoo metamorphosis.
Pain, the sting of the honeybee.
Bearing the ****** even though you bleed.
Written on the flesh, drawn upon the flesh, a story of who you are eternally expressed.
I want to read your body and understand each chapter.
Tattoos and piercings modify your outer appearance, exactly how you want it to be.
The times are a changing and with it people change too. There was this cosmic tool handed down to me and I am obliged to use it. The ancient’s voice their opinion through my being, I simply add the eyes that see the New Age approaching. The Old Trees and the land is shrinking and their cries fill my eyes with tears. The ghostly natives whisper wisdom in my nightmares of apocalypse. Their heart is the heart of Gaia and Gaia’s heart is having an attack. The blood of man has spilled for too long and I don’t want to use that as my ink. New face of war, technological war, info war, consciousness war.
It’s up to the artist now to open the third eye. Whatever that Art maybe I hope its an Art that leads to peaceful freedom and if it doesn’t, it is the Art of death. Battle of light & Dark.
The light in you will spark the light in others.
revolution art individual freedom change consciousness soul earth
I’m on a quest to defeat my deepest fears.
I don’t want this tattooed tear anymore.
I want to explore, adore,and absorb love.
I turn my back to those demons that have controlled me for so long.
I now follow the song that universal spirit sings.
I chase myself until I find that perfect state of happiness.
I move forward and see what life brings.
This is classico amor, un amor con mucho valor.
Como tequila y limón, este amor tiene un poderoso sabor.
Baby you make me feel passionate like listening to a Vicente Fernandez song and you feel it hit you in your Core.
Everyday is Valentine's s Day when I'm with you.
Everyday I appreciate you.
You know how much I love to sing to you, how much I like to express how I feel through music and poetry.
Princesa, yo soy tu Guerrero De Amor, el único que sabe como quererte fuerte y suavecito.
Soy yo amor mío,
Quien golpea la puerta de tu corazón.
Deja me entrar,
Y te prometo que conmigo estarás feliz.
Una pasión bien fuerte quemándose como fuego,
Tú eres la razón.
Soy la solución a tu tristeza.
Al contrario, solo mírate reír.
Ríndete, no existe la palabra lastimar, solo amor,
Con todo lo bueno que soy.
Vine a curar y vivir en tu alma.
Soy el ultimo pedazo de tu rompe cabeza, lo que usted necesitaba.
Eres el aire que respiro, lo que me ase vivir.
Tú, Como un sueño real que quiero cumplir.
Te voy a ensenar lo que es amor y borrar tu dolor.
Las personas amables se merecen lo mejor.
Contigo, pudiéramos hacer lo todo.
En la escurrida, eres el brillante foco.
Al fin este deseo se hizo verdad.
the only poem I've written in Spanish. I wrote this for my ex-girlfriend three years ago. I was madly in love ha-ha as you can tell
Craters on the moon are injuries caused by the power the universe holds.
In the night you continue to shine down on us lonely strangers.
The saying "the freaks come out at night " best describes our relationship.
Your the light we admire.
Your the source of our creativity.
When I can't sleep, looking at you for inspiration is my favorite activity.
The relief I feel knowing someone out there is doing the same calms my overdrived mind.
I want to be brave like the moon, undiscouraged even though it's surrounded by darkness.
Still being able to shine it's guiding light.
Surround yourself with positivity. Appreciate the sunrise.
Take care of Mother Earth because she provides you with the fruits of life.
Be humble with what you have because there are others out there less fortunate.
And when you breath take it in like its the last one, release those worries away.
Be brave, step out of the cave and love
And laugh, think, cry
And laugh, think, cry.
Now isn't that a full day.
There was no way I could make her happy. The only sympathy I could offer her was my shoulder.
A place where her black tears could dry on my collared shirt.
How could I numb her pain.
I couldn't tell her "this is not the right place" or "people are looking."
Feelings aren't meant to be bottled up inside I figured but relinquished like the make up leaking down on her cheek.
At that moment I had the privilege of witnessing the uncovered human in her.
Disappointment is thrown strongly at my direction.
Blame gathers in large quantities like a pest infestation.
"It's your fault" and words like "You always make mistakes" evoke anger.
Anger which I want to take out on myself and take out on others.
I can excel in my work of choice, I know I'm more than average.
The bad gets pointed out more and little praise is given for the good.
Stunned by unmoving words. I'm like a prisoner sentenced to jail, released and expected to do worse.
Destruction emerges from my enraged emotions, i wish your words could offer a solution.
I want to be an alchemist and turn things into gold.
It's ironic how I am a creator of words but cant create better words in my critics.
Conversations lead to arguments because i want to be heard.
I'm sick of revolving doors, sick of being slammed by your atrocious comments.
"You have no common sense" you say to me, maybe I just prefer to be in a daydream, my mind drifting away because life is too dull.
Realize that what you say has an effect and that effect can drive somebody or stop them in motion.
I find myself looking for you in other people.
Whether it is in the way they think or the way they appear, I see straight through them to you.
I find you in places I thought I could be alone.
Where once I could go to this view to clear my head, now only causes me distress.
I remember sitting on the beach once and your eyes washed upon the shore line.
I am waiting to go home into your arms.
I need you so much, that another person's touch, practically causes any feeling of attraction.
You held the power to make me smile when no one else could.
And I don't think I'll find satisfaction until someone else can capture my attention.
- Christian Ek
You can dress it as much as you want.
Cover it with pretty glitter and flaunt.
Place it in a cave where it can never feel the touch of the sun.
Protect it because you've felt it almost gone, as soon as someone special came along.
All I want is to see your beating heart.
To know that your alive and that when I touch you, it makes it beat as fast as mine.
I want to relate to your love more than anything.
My pen is a wand. It can write a curse or a powerful charm. My pen is a mirror. It can show you a monster or a beautiful figure. My pen is a key. It can free you from a trapped door or it can lock you inside that door until the oxgen runs out and you can't breath. My pen is a weapon. It will fight righteous battles or make a gruesome dissection. My pen is a balancing scale.
It is a balancing scale because it tilts when the yin & yang of my being begins to out weight one other.
Nothing is safe from my pen if i choose it not to be, my pen writes freely without filters or censorship.
My pen is a ship in the sea unable to maintain equilibrium set on a course to land. One day it will stay still, but on that day my pen will run out of ink.
Nocturnal night vision and these visions are hard to swallow.
Blanket darkness, sleepy hallow, listening to the owl.
Emptiness is out and about, on the prowl.
From the bowls thoughts become foul.
At night they release their most powerful howls.
The sun kills the imagination like the reaper.
Sleep paralysis and my body becomes weaker.
Uncontrollable dreams take a toll on me and
I want to know their meanings.
I stay up thinking about the day like a movie replay.
It’s hard to rest my eyes when nocturnal night visions turn me into prey.
We will survive a Blackened world because we want it more. The moment will come when Metallica will raise hell and the last dying flower is crushed by an iron boot. These heavy guitar riffs shooting out lead will prevail. Awakening the masses and making them step off the conveyor belt. Another Brick In The Wall broken by the people just like when the berlin wall fell.
Freedom is right around the corner.
I am not your Stepping Stone, your seat to enjoy the show. May the Gods of Rock blow your mind with electric mania, liberating their children in the pit. They beg for this music we call metal, ******* and punk to continue.
Rage Against the Machine - "******* i wont do what you tell me!"
I want you to look through my infinite playlist and see your eyes light up by my music.
We could spend a night talking about spirituality through the arts of shamanistic practices or criticize american politics.
Or we could lay down quietly side by side and hear our lungs inhale oxygen.
You don't get the same reactions at a bar or club. While the rest seek to hide the self, I seek to free it.
I am daring you to bring out your true self into the light and without any filters.
I am challenging your insecurity, to release the prisoner hiding behind solid bones, get me deep into your core and put away your sharp teeth.
Your with me, where you can feel free.
Harley motorcycles and leather boots
I burn rubber, so don't even try to pursuit.
Addicted to heavy metal and the people unafraid to jump in the pit.
I got a high for danger and a curiosity for the forbidden.
A speed freak pushing it to the limit.
Energy drinks, the adrenaline just keeps going up.
Fill my tank up with gasoline because i don't want to stop, until my flesh turns into dust.
Because my wild heart is ticking and it wont slow down.
The Panther in me will claw you down.
We are the writers who defy being told what to say, how to think, or express ourselves. We write not for the glory of recognition but for the sake to give words meaning. For all you outcast that have ever been told you are not a poet, were out here too, waiting to see what you create with your pen. - Christian Ek
Give me half of what you love.
What you let yourself be devoured by.
Spanish romance, drunken cantinas, Men cry.
Persuade the un-driven only through sacrifice.
The Vices the heart speaks are your impulsive desires.
Light my fire, Light my ******* fire because it's in dire need of an aspire.
By Christian Ek
" He brought back life into places no one thought could still put up a fight."
- Christian Ek
Photo Shoot Quotes I wrote.
"Turn your back on what doesn't keep you moving forward."
A quote i made as a title for a photo my friend took of me.
People come into your life with a purpose.
The universe gives you support or gives you a challenge.
In the last three years I had a person deliver both.
The truth will always surface no matter how hidden it can be.
I've been on the highest mountain and in the highest peak.
I've been submerged in the deepest ocean and drowned in it slowly.
But somehow I've come out more alive than ever.
These hard lessons have made me grow wiser, become kinder, more disciplined and more loving.
I wish you could see me now.
How I'm learning to finally fly on my own.
I cry now because I'm ready, ready to let you go.
The ax chips away at the skin of the wood
The moldy parts that are no longer good.
If the wood should keep me warm throughout the winter nights, I need it to be of the best quality.
As I do my dance around the fire and chant empowerment into my limited being.
I am blessed with the removal of obstacles.
Dead weight that I had carried.
I can dance for myself, I can travel through time on my own and I can burn like the strong fire before me.
A Red Ruby, if placed upon the chest, can melt through your rib cage and engulf your entire body with flames.
It's delicate appearance of a heart was purposely constructed that way, in order to desire with a fierce blaze.
Red Rubies were made to crystallize your eyes and make every single sensual thought behind them harden until they crack and find its way into your blood stream and into your love making.
Red Rubies are a euphoric gemstone stimulating your need to love and give into the desirable.
Our love was like a roller coaster with it's up's and down's
A spinning round circle we both got caught in.
The expectations were high in the beginning, but the thrill died when we reached the top and realized we did not share the same view.
Our love was a like roller coaster with it's up's and down's.
We felt like passengers in our seats, we felt one another constrained by our seat belts like we didn't want to be there and that the pretty lights that once attracted us there now blinded us.
Our love was like a roller coaster that ended with us getting off and both of us leaving what we thought was love, on that doubtfully safe, old metal seat to rust.