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Charlie Ivins Nov 2010
Mother tell me, are you lying?
Mother please, I'm sick of trying.

These thoughts and feelings I can't ignore,
as I lay upon the floor.

Broken, tired, and abused.
Won't you bring me some good news?

Countless times I've broke down crying,
mother please, am I dying?

Is there something that can be done,
to take away this pain I'm hiding?

Love is a bullet and Life is the gun.
Hate is what brings about senseless fighting.

Mother, you see how I feel.
Yet it's what I hide that matters.

Mother, Mother, here's the deal.
The outside stays fine while the inside shatters.

Mother, is this real?
Oh dear Mother, will I heal?
Charlie Ivins Nov 2010
Secrets of the heart,
are better locked away.

It's hard to think smart,
with them hidden everyday.

Writing is my escape,
who would read these notes?

At night I'm up late,
writing down my hopes.

I write through the night,
until tears fill my eyes.

They slowly blur my sight,
breaking down my disguise.

I've told you how I feel,
you know I want you back.

I don't want to try and heal,
it is your love I lack.

You aren't meant to read this,
you aren't meant to see.

My lips miss your kiss,
you don't see what you do to me.
Charlie Ivins Nov 2010
I'm not sure if this is just,
for this is far too cruel.

My feelings are far stronger than lust,
and I fight them each day at school.

I can't deny my love,
but I can hide it most times.

My heart feels your tug,
don't you see the signs?

I'm dying alone,
more each time you pass.

In your arms was my home,
but now my heart might as well be glass.
Charlie Ivins Nov 2010
It's what you don't see,
that resonates within.

A voice whispers to me,
"This should be a sin".

I find it so wrong,
but love somehow makes it right.

I've fought my temptation too long,
please take me back tonight.

You know how I feel,
you know this to be true.

You know I want to heal,
you know I want you...
Charlie Ivins Nov 2010
It's always one step forward,
and two steps back.
My heart I should guard,
lest it suffer an attack.

My words seem to blend,
no longer do I see the difference.
And as my heart slowly begins to mend,
things haven't been the same since.

The actions are knives,
and words are the salt.
As we move on with our lives,
each one of our hearts shall halt.

I'm lucky to be alive,
and be here this day.
I look to the sky,
remembering how you took my breath away.

Questions left unanswered,
who would have guessed?
Nothing will be like they once were,
and I'll still only be second best.
Charlie Ivins Nov 2010
The smile on her face,
is enough to make my day.
It's her loving embrace,
that I wanted to stay.

But she's moved on,
and I can't be selfish.
It's this star I wish upon,
and those memories I cherish.

I'm happy for her,
and in a way she's not gone.
And this is something I am for sure,
my feelings must be withdrawn.

Things will be different,
I'm sure of it now.
I hope the true message is sent,
because this is the only way I know how.

Love only lasts so long,
but now things have changed.
I hope this isn't taken wrong,
and emotions must be rearranged.
Charlie Ivins Nov 2010
Things seemed to be fixed,
they were set in stone.
But now everything been mixed,
and I'm here all alone.

Your actions confuse me,
How am I suppost to react?
When all you seem to want to see,
is me "intact".

My act seems to work,
you don't question my words.
I'm going beserk,
and insanity is what I'm leaning towards.

I'm starting to lose sight,
of how things once were.
I know how we would fight,
but our love was the cure.

Things sure have changed,
in the shortest of time.
Now life is so strange,
now that you're not mine..
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