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Charissa leah Oct 2015
I was crying in the dark,
Trying not to fall apart,
And where were you?
I needed your arms,
Keep me safe and warm,
But where were you?
You said you'd never go,
But you left me all alone,
And where were you?
Wrists and thighs bleeding,
My heart stopped beating,
But where were you?
I tried calling out,
But no one was around,
Cause where were you?
Charissa leah Sep 2015
Music makes me happy
For those lasting but fleeting
Three minutes and forty-five seconds
I forget that I'm upset
I forget how they stress me out,
And my so called friends stopped talking to me.
I forget everything
And I am happy
Genuinely happy
But then the song ends
And I'm back to being me
Boring, depressed, lonely,
Charissa leah Aug 2015
When you look at me, I know what you see:
A six year old girl with scraped up knees.
You still want to tuck me in at night,
Make sure it's safe and leave on a light;
Check for monsters under my bed,
Tell me goodnight, and kiss my head.

My scraped up knees became scraped up wrists:
Battle scars from the razor in my fist.
It's been a few days since I last ate,
It's what I do to keep off the weight.
Don't check for monsters under my bed,
I'm afraid they've moved inside my head.

You don't understand the things that I've seen:
You don't know what everything means.
Please let me go before I let you down,
Just set me free before I drown.
I'm sorry that I will never be enough,
Why the hell did I want to grow up?
Charissa leah Aug 2015
Once upon a time
You said I was obsessed with that phrase
You know why it like it so much?
Because it reminds me of life.
Life is a story and and every sentence, every word, creates the plot and leads to the ******
The best and the worst part of it
Is that you can't skip ahead
To see how everything turns out
You have to take it one page at a time
It reminds me that no matter how hard life is right now, in this moment
This moment won't last forever
It's just a chapter in my once upon a time
Charissa leah Aug 2015
I hope you find her someday
The girl who lights up your world simply by existing
The girl who makes you
laugh louder
Smile bigger
The girl who makes your eyes shine
So much brighter
I hope she loves you so much it scares her
I hope you have everything you wanted in life

I hope you find her someday. . .
Even though she isn't me.
Charissa leah Aug 2015
my mind is at war. . .

and my body is the battleground.
Charissa leah Aug 2015
Words are bullets
And every single one burns through me
Creating an infectious hole
Each one tears me down
And rips me apart

Words are knives
And each syllable flies toward me  
And opens a new wound
   Each blade cutting deeper
And deeper than the last

Words are machine guns
Tearing through and destroying me
Piece by piece, I'm torn apart
But no one can see
Cause it's all in my head

Maybe I'm weak
Maybe I'm sensitive
But every single word
Goes directly to my heart
That's why I'm broken and coming apart
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