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5.4k · Jul 2021
the twist
Cat Marshall Jul 2021
I just hate this, I don’t hate you
until we kiss I’ll escape you
oh where’s the twist, I’m enraged, who’s
the god of fate to complain to

do you love me like I love you?
but I always know when a love’s true
see fire, into it I tune
chemistry shatters the whole room

sent me an angel too early
you are too pretty and pearly
and you could heal me or hurt me
I’m bad and broken, you’re holy

too much unspoken, you don’t see
below the surface I’m hurting
I dream of barriers burning
you pull me back as I’m turning

run with me, keep this a secret
make up for a life filled with regret
exiled societal rejects
star crossed love lost, now we reflect

I severed ties, sent a letter
the final feeling, forget her
bore the burden, barely better
she’d lose her life, they won’t let her

the fantasy failed to survive
it was as though she had just died
our dangerous dance was denied
fell into smoking, drugs and wine

so hollow without the saviour
forced to get stronger and braver
seek solitude that I favour
give myself the love I gave her

can’t give the choice to the chosen
goodbye, our meaningful moments
in november were the omens
in winter forever frozen
599 · Jul 2021
mannequin
Cat Marshall Jul 2021
thought our passion was like fire
thought you were my twin
I realise
I was sleeping with a mannequin

felt deeply for your trauma
or the lies you spin?
you wore me out for nothing
yeah you wore me thin

a heart fractured and martyred
sadness comes in waves
I wake up and I’m grieving at
the light of day

a tragedy, I’m worth more in your
power play
lost in lust and listless
I’m lost where we lay

you’re whats called a player
well string me along!
I just wanna waste time with you!
girl you got me wrong …

all I got is a hard lesson
a regretful song
and a jaded view of dating
one which you prolong

you raised me up to famous
just to pull me down
like codeine and casillero
it’s in you I drown

sheets of deceit and emptiness
attachments foul
the joke’s on me, hilarious
I get it now

that once again I’ve fallen for the
narcissist
now you’re crying for my comeback
but you won’t be missed

I’m damaged from the danger
that lies in your kiss
I refuse to be your puppet
you won’t be my bliss
542 · Aug 2017
tools for reinvention
Cat Marshall Aug 2017
turned self hatred to ego death
order out of chaotic mess
I have sinned, I must confess
from denying that I am blessed

for I’m a vessel for the power
big and bright, to which I cower
self-protecting, sad wallflower
procrastinate my finest hour

my heart expired, my talents latent
the Universe frowns at complacence
signalled for change in ways so blatant
uncovered what was truly fated

so “no more!”, I said aloud
in a tone uncanny and proud
gathered the few truths I found
stood for justice, stood my ground

wielded tools for reinvention
based on only good intention
so whilst my past begs for a mention
I’m better pressed to break convention

break myself and forge another
birth my own daughter and mother
court my own subconscious lover
love yourself, then love each other

because life’s too short to **** yourself
it’s got that sorted, watch your health
harness your power, know your wealth
you’ll gather dust sat on that shelf
468 · Apr 2017
worthy cause
Cat Marshall Apr 2017
give me this, i swear to god
written on this sharp emblazoned sword
i’ll give you my world in exchange for yours
spoken freely through enraging chords
if you do mine, then i’ll do yours
not in half measures, we’re changing laws
got lots of grip for such poor baby paws
just read my lips, my ******* worthy cause

give me this, my only god
give me one chance, one approving nod
i’ll give you my words in exchange for yours
hoping freely for game changing thoughts
if you change mine, then i’ll change yours
not in half measures, no lies in the court
no theft of things that can just be bought
through worthy work, i am your worthy cause

give me peace in my own mind
give me the me that i left behind
and within me i think that you’ll find
ancient treasures that need a remind
long lost pleasures of a human kind
no half measures of new spoken rhyme
playful leisures that don’t cross the line
now you’ll get yours, i’m more yours than mine
339 · Apr 2017
trendsetter
Cat Marshall Apr 2017
my thoughts are a million
cutting through like blood stained vermilion
i’m feeling so brilliant
the cards are dealt, the rest i’m just filling in

and i see the sun again
burns my eyes and now i feel one again
i’ve won the prize, thank you ladies and gentlemen
brought me so high with your sweet sentiment

cos surely i’m better than
these lazy lowlifes lost in the labyrinth
crawling blind down places you’ve never been
dancing in darkness, it never ends

i’ve got the better friends
i’ve got the love, got places to settle in
i’ve got the fire in the furnace to burn the men
i’ve got the sword and i’m earnest to fight again

with my brand new eyes i can see, see?
yeah i see it better
i change the weather
i change the narrative with each **** letter
i change forever
i change my fate, we are birds of a feather
i back down never
i back myself, yes i am the trendsetter
332 · May 2017
a burning sun
Cat Marshall May 2017
am i just your bird in your cage?
but i’m not so pretty when you fill me with rage
i’m just acting my age
i’m not your flower, not your slave.

you just can’t keep up with the pace
i’m not such a sight when i show my true face
not little mermaid, now sail away
for i am a danger, a waif and a stray

was i once life’s rich tapestry?
well tear me down and leave me be
i'm not here to fulfil your "needs"
which you declare so selfishly

so needlessly, dramatically
endlessly and emphatically
until you see the back of me
it’s only then that you will see

now what am i? a feminist?
threatening the chauvinist?
a temptress for a forsaken kiss?
no, i am just a point you missed

but i will bite and i will hiss
your heat can’t melt my iron fist
i’m not a treat, more of a trick
you won’t get what you want from this

as i am fixed, i won’t succumb
you can’t keep me down and dumb
a little quiet, a little numb ...
or maybe just under your thumb

so what am i? a burning sun.
i think that’s what i have become
and if i burn then you can run
i'll fight my fight til i have won
253 · Apr 2017
the unholy land
Cat Marshall Apr 2017
now the thin ice is breaking beneath our feet
i miss the unholy land where we used to meet
it was a far cry from the many walked down streets
the place where we tuned our synchronised heartbeat

but you couldn't stay, couldn't handle the heat
we sparked something off and it singed too deep
so i'll pack up my things, but the rewards we reaped
they've lost their shimmer and many i can't keep

this twisted psychological ladders and snakes
up, down, rolling dice ... what was real has proved fake
disintegrated into nothing and i've got the shakes
shook by the rawest portrayal of how my wild heart breaks

going to take the quickest route to get out of this place
to change my environment, or just forget your face
that held the false sense of hope to which i'm tightly laced
crushed by the heavy weight of something that once filled a space
140 · Oct 2018
stalemate
Cat Marshall Oct 2018
stalemate
you won’t move, i don’t wanna
check your game, chuck my pride, change your order
fall from grace like an unruly daughter
mess you’ve made
false friend fade, i don’t want ya

it’s too late
i’ve got no more to offer your
charity case of no boundaries or borders
a parade of disorder
i’m a lamb to the slaughter

mockery
you know me
you know my life’s unholy
promise of love to show me
my empty hands are folding
i’ll push you out
just watch me
exile you
don’t you touch me
thought you could
beat and box me
sly fox
i am too trusting

— The End —