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Aug 2012 · 1.1k
Finding My Way
Casper DM Aug 2012
Strung out in heaven, I fell from the start,
Deep pools of ocean blue, you captured my heart
Waited forever for lips to set me free,
But the haunt of your smile now imprisons me,

Standing on the corner, I hear the devil sing
Notes in the darkness I don’t dare to dream,
Late last summer, is farther than it seems
My charmed life has lost its gleem,

I keep finding my way, my way back to you again
I keep fighting my way, my way back to you again
I keep praying my way, my way back to you again
I keep stumbling my way, my way back to you, again.

Some say a poet, some call me a cad,
You call me ******, for living with a past,
You know I waited for you to change your mind,
I’m standing a shadow,
Running out of time

Battered & broken, Thirteen across this chest,
Scarred & defeated,The wicked get no rest,
You know I waited for you to change your mind,
I’m only a shadow,
running out of time.
Aug 2012 · 1.0k
The Wait
Casper DM Aug 2012
Living with you & your memories,
Blue, hollow heart and haunted mind.
And she's the needle
That you come back too
And the riddle,
You can't unwind,
You can't unwind.

I never bought that line that you're crazy
A wasted man
Beyond repair,
And through your purple eyes,
I can see the light
And through your whiskey lies,
I can hear the truth
The truth unwinds.

Living with you & your memories,
The ***** & pills have taken a toll,
And you’re the needle
That lays beside me
& The riddle I can’t unwind,
I can’t unwind,

I'm gonna wait, til you really love me
til you really need me
Want me around
and it's gonna take
A mountain to move me
And ocean to lose me
To swallow me down,
I'm gonna wait.
Aug 2012 · 1.1k
The Don't Go Waltz
Casper DM Aug 2012
Sometimes I fear you hanging me form a string.
with the Lines running down the back of your legs to those heels,
For you’re sure to adore, then ignore and set me free,
Cast me asail and alone on a sea of misery,

But baby don’t Go
You were meant for me
Baby don’t go
You were meant for me
Baby don’t go
You were meant for me
Baby don’t go
You were meant for me

I fell asleep in the deep black ink of your retreat,
In my slumber I fell with my heart peeled  a heavy beat,
well you froze from the words that my love mouth did preach,
Pulled away for today left my head twisted in deceit,

But Baby don’t go
You were meant for me
Baby don’t go
You were meant for me
Baby don’t go
You were meant for me
Baby don’t go
You were meant for me

But don’t worry baby,
They call this the honeymoon,
I’ll take you for granted,
And it’ll be happenin’ soon
You’ll learn to hate,
The way I say your name,
I’ll fall to my knees to whisper again,
Aug 2012 · 1.1k
7 feet of Pine
Casper DM Aug 2012
In my foolish rush to be,
I passed everything by,
I took chance upon chance,
Scheming for the next big thing.
The next big push,
As I let them all slip away,
One by one.
Through my gambler's hands.
I knocked all of it down,
Expectations, ambitions,
Searching for fulfillment,
Of the false prophecy,
Of emptiness.
Whittled into an old fool,
Upon his knees,
As a broken dog,
Feeding on the scraps of cast off love affairs.
Deserving of no more than this.
The standing dead tree,
Too rotten to harvest,
A waste of space.
Casper DM Aug 2012
It happens more
Often than not,
I look in the mirror of your eyes
Hear the tremble that lives
Deep in your throat
Watch the carnival dance of
Uneasy skeletons as your lips
Part to repeat one thing,
Just one thing, Over
And over again.
Hold you to feel the want,
Knowing that You Struggle,
To push away first.
Lay alone with you
To remain alone,
And it is this:
That I am you,
And you, I.
Aug 2012 · 861
..And you wished to be more
Casper DM Aug 2012
It started as small engine,
Of the insect wings.
The ballet between the stem,
And the seducer.
The blossom to be violated,
With the natural lust,
Of flight.
The swelling tummy,
And promise of peace,
Of fulfillment and joy.
And gods own
Breath upon the skin.
Hope that fights,
Against an early frost,
Hides from the aphid's teeth,
And swallows beak.
Proud mother glowing from Color,
Of a slow ripening fruit,
Upon the branches.
Basking in the sun and moon,
And growing bolder still.
Praying for the moment of release,
Never turning to watch the tears,
Left in it's place.
Wanting, yet
Knowing never,
To be collected.
Left here,
Upon the cold
Dead leaves of ancestors.
Eaten away with decay,
Taken by the disease,
Of this earth.
As tears fall from high,
Only to shatter
Against the frozen ground.
Aug 2012 · 1.1k
Colder Still
Casper DM Aug 2012
Everyday she was by my side
In puddles of morning rain,
Wet sneakers splashing.
Arms wrapped around,
Sore shoulders
Hanging, dead weight.
Eyes squinting at the Sun's
Awakening, early morning blooms.
In the cold dark of night,
The warmth of her to keep me,
Safe from the ice storms of my dreams.
Everyday she was by my side.
until now, now the chill of my life
Runs unchecked, my now dry feet
Colder still.
Aug 2012 · 433
Casper DM Aug 2012
Two hundred years ago,
We met.
And you were for me,
Even then. I saw it in your eyes
The first time I stepped
Into your path as you turned the corner,
Your round-toed shoes perfect,
As I brought down
My stare to meet them.
My momentary lapse of confidence,
Pierced with tender lips.
Carriage wheels spun,
As my heart leapt from my vest,
My mind counted,
The times I would say your name.
From this day forward,
Until the earth stood still,
And the sun burned dark
Those few letters bound
To my every happiness
I have waited all these years,
Just to hold you in my gaze again.
To feel the pain of ages escape,
With the breaths you steal in a kiss.
The small hands,
That once held my soul in place,
Back in mine.
And now with winter's dead,
Creeping into my ears,
Footprints in the snow,
Spilling away from me,
I will wait two hundred more,
Counting the times,
I will say your name
Casper DM Aug 2012
You ask of me,
To trust.
To bite of the ripened peach.
Savor the delight that is you,
Breathe in ecstasy,
The elixir of your flesh.
The starlight of your eyes,
Illuminating the darkness,
On the path that I have followed.
The butterfly wings that flutter,
Against my skin,
With each and every kiss.
You ask this of me.
To forget the inevitable,
****** of the blade.
Accept the scar from the flame,
Your eventual absence will bring me.
To welcome the oncoming storm,
Of winter with open arms.
To worship,
Hope for,
The oncoming death,
Of your love for me.
Ask me once more.
Aug 2012 · 685
Casper DM Aug 2012
Into A Den Of Vipers...
…And with smiles that belied
The truth of their desire
Ragged claws hidden
Beneath the charms and approval
Eyes that flashed
From tranquil blue to a dark
Mass of emptiness
They all stood and stared,
Calculated reach
To touch, To hold, to feel,
To steal and devour the last
Remnants of flesh from the frame.
Picking over the slowly decaying bones
Of an aged Prince,
all of you to revel in the dust.
Aug 2012 · 629
Perfectly Foolish
Casper DM Aug 2012
Perfectly Foolish
I am
To think that I'd be rewarded,
For decades of doubt,
The Denial in the sublime.
To be caught so unawares,
I missed the moment,
To hold you so tight,
Yet empty,
In grasp from my,
Reeling fingertips,
That ached in the very thought of you.
To be so set that,
Change tempts me none.
Fighting everything you,
Were given to show me.
By the sublime of the heavens.
Struggling against,
Decades of wait.
Gasping for air even as
Her Gift was to fill these lungs.
Stupid to imagine,
One more piece
Of hope.
One more gift
Of charity.
One more touch
Of compassion.
One more breath
Her lungs to mine.
One more exhale
Of God,
Into this now dead chest.
I have found the punishment,
For disbelief.
Aug 2012 · 567
Casper DM Aug 2012
Into her arms I have fallen once more
The lover of my childhood.,
The safety net that nurses me,
I swallow in the breath of her
Burn my throat,
Make me feel the emptiness.
The pain that I endure to forgive myself,
My misdeeds,
My birth.
In the newness of this rapture I bathe,
In exquisite release,
Knowing too well the spiral
To follow.
Reckless I wander further into her,
One more sip of my demons to out run you all.
The truth be told that a false happiness,
Betters a real misery.
Aug 2012 · 382
Praying Hands
Casper DM Aug 2012
In the humming glow,
Of the street lights throw,
I stand in one place,
Feet as frozen as my glare.
Onto these hands,
Open palms turned downward,
Every scar a memory,
Lost and found,
In the back of my eyes
Each raised vein pushing,
Against the skin
To show unseen letters,
Words hidden from me.
Here all along,
Pressed flat against the bone,
Only to be awakened by your touch.
And I stand in one place,
Feet frozen as my glare
As words scroll in infinite possibilities
Over the back of these hands….
Aug 2012 · 885
Casper DM Aug 2012
I am empty.
Watching fingers pull,
My severed wrists across the floor,
The ragged flesh torn.
Violent separation,
As birth into this world.
Each scarred and broken hand
Slow slithering crawl,
Haunting me with failure.
Black paths trail,
And threats breathe,
The release of demons.
These hands that I cut from my own self,
To keep the visions away,
Bloodied I prayed,
For the words to stop.
To erase every memory,
Every syllable.
Be rid of these limbs,
Instruments of self deceit.
To become,
That my eyes, my mind,
My heart,
To follow suit.
And I,
To be free,
At peace.
I have spilled blood for eternity,
Paid the toll for salvation,
Again and again.
Yet I am wretched.
My head swimming in lies,
Drowning in truths.
Cursed to live in twisted misery.
Whispers through the crack,
Under the door that
Fill my ears.
The stain of loss,
Upon my clothes.
And your every word,
Bitter upon my tongue.
Aug 2012 · 567
Casper DM Aug 2012
Slow suffocation,
As I inhale the fumes of
Decomposing deep blue vinyl.
The bottom of the bottle growing ever closer
With dread.
My jaw and teeth ache with
A Mind racing into hope.
I dream of you.
In my owns reflection,
I see your eyes radiate.
With every thin beat from the dashboard,
I seek your sigh
Laughter from each Am radio squall.
In the small glare upon the glass,
I wonder of the golden sun upon your skin.
With Cold Fingertips
I reach to feel the warmth of your breath
In cool winter air.
Watch dust float
Upon the air,
A thousand blossoms
In the wind,
As you walk
Through a forest of cherry trees in spring.
A dream in which to escape.
And Now,
So many years later
I seek to escape
The dream of you
Aug 2012 · 954
Casper DM Aug 2012
I awoke with the taste
Of tin on the roof,
of my mouth.
From dreams of rotten flesh,
Between my teeth.
Morning's light ,
Cloudy from the haze,
Emptiness brings.
The air thick,
With dead skunk,
Spiders dancing in their webs,
Dangling icicles,
Of deceit,
To foolish bees.
Among Yesterdays catch,
Of the fly.
I focused on the slow,
Crawl of black blood.
Washing the wall red,
In it's March.
And dreamed of you.
The scent of your hair,
Dangling Icicles,
I kissed you.
Laid before me,
Slight lips parted.
Looking through me,
With blue/ brown eyes.
I awoke with the dream
Of you.
And focused,
On the slow crawl,
Of black blood.
Washing the lens,
Of blue /brown,
Aug 2012 · 424
Casper DM Aug 2012
I imagine
You lying,
Head upon the chest
Of another.
Hating every
Up and down,
Of his breath.
Each exhale
In waves
Against your cheek
Hating every breath,
Each exhale
Against your cheek
I have missed since
Your head lay
Upon the chest
Of another.
Aug 2012 · 904
The Liar
Casper DM Aug 2012
I keep my mouth shut,
When I want to speak.
Glance half hearted,
As you walk out.
Turn my cheek,
To beg for your fist.
Tell you I am unbreakable,
While my mind,
Shatters in your absence.
Lie when I press my lips to yours,
Cold and second thought.
Shout that I am bulletproof,
Callous and bitter,
As your sideways glance,
Leaves me bleeding inside.
Long nights alone,
With my demons,
As I am unbearable.
Aug 2012 · 722
The White Room Is Here
Casper DM Aug 2012
In the dead
Black night.
The thick ink
Cloud of the dark
In The swirling syrup, left in
The squid's retreat.
They came for me.
Slender silver ghosts,
Small streams of smoke.
Into my ears.
And throat.
Snakes of remains
And worms,
Of the past.
They swim my life,
Taking what they wish,
Stealing chrome cast memories,
From the back of my eyes.
Screaming they pass,
The thin of my ear's drum.
To bury and nest,
Among the rich hate
Of a mind.
Of an easy mark,
A broken gate.
Twisting to and forth,
In the sheer of their path.
Lining up to feed,
Among familiar souls.
The tired and true,
The odd collection.
Into the next set of sleep.
Aug 2012 · 1.1k
Three Words To Fail
Casper DM Aug 2012
A thousand failed sonnets
To profess mine Passion

A world of Gemstones
To show thy worth

A Moon of spun silk ribbon
To caress Thy Skin

An Army of Archers
To Protect Thy heart

Humble me with reason
To think these enough

These words that whisper
To Reveal Mine soul

I Love You
Aug 2012 · 678
Casper DM Aug 2012
Everyone walked by,
And I,
Indifferent to the thunder,
Of The Gunshot.
Laughing, smiling, abandon.
Stepping over me,
My body like the carcass,
Of a dead deer.
Black eyed swollen.
Except you.
Who held me.
Your arms wrapped,
Around my ribs,
Struggling to stop,
The blood Pouring,
Through the hole in my chest.
My drawn on smile,
Smearing in the stream,
Of tears Escaping,
Upon my cheeks.
Aug 2012 · 667
Casper DM Aug 2012
Your words still my blood
I am empty.
A hollow shell of spirit,
Drew fire into my lungs
And exhaled with great joy
The hope of love.
The faith in your divine.
A withered knight falling again
And again upon the sword
Beg mercy to escape the agony of this deed
Compounded misdeeds,
Now seem Trifle.
As the blood hardens thick
In veins
Refusing to release
Upon the steel
And guarantee
Of An eternal Torment.
Aug 2012 · 476
Two Sided Coin
Casper DM Aug 2012
Hate me because you can't sleep
Hate me because you can't Love,
Hate me because you can't forget
Hate me because you can't pretend,
Hate me because you spiral downward
And won't take the blame.
Hate me for loving you even before my own self.

I can't sleep.
I can't Love
I can't forget
I can't pretend,
I spiral downward
And won't take the blame.
And for loving me even before your own self,
For all of this I hate you, too.
Aug 2012 · 611
Casper DM Aug 2012
There is a comfort in darkness,
in emptiness.
The stability of nothingness......

In the heart it Lay ,
unfettered by the years of denial,
but growing
with the drink of self indulgence.....
Aug 2012 · 1.0k
You Have Killed Me
Casper DM Aug 2012
You have killed me
I lay crumpled upon the oil stained
My heart staggers
a slow crawl
Black blood spilling
thru broken teeth
And sticky sweet
exhale of betrayal.
Caught in the swell of your deceit
Cast upon the rocks
broken into flotsam
For the receding tide.
Fate has tricked me into temptation
And with this last gasp of
Cinnamon scent
I curse her.

— The End —