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Cara May Mar 2017
The day I met you
I know my dark side
would capture your face
and made you her lover.
I know you'll be the thunder
that'll send electric all over my body
and be my wish on 11:11.
now i'm left with nothing
but my dark side,
and the sparkle eyes you gave
and charming smile you cast on me.
Cara May Jan 2017
Aesthetic lights, stars and souls,
crowding the place consuming the blithe vibes.
Happy musics reflected on the hearts
of hundreds of people whom seek to feel alive.
On the one night all hearts are union
ending the chapter of one book,
starting the chapter of other book
with fireworks as the starting point.
Happy new year everyone!
Cara May Oct 2016
you dragged me along your backyard
you threw my body 6 feet under
after you stabbed my heart.
you gave up
and didn't put up a fight.
you buried me
with black roses
and no headstone.
you left me there
bleeding.
betrayal by the loved one.
?
Cara May Feb 2017
?
I often have a detrimental thought
of my existence
my purpose on earth.
It took my energy
and my glow.
It made me fade from yellow
to grey; sadness
Because I couldn't join the puzzle.
To produce a new life?
but I'm not pretty
To be a healer?
but I'm not smart.
It remain a mystery to me.
Cara May Oct 2016
A girl sobbing in the corner
writing down poems of her life.
She writes,
the flowers she touched died;
the people she kept cried and left.
Her past is her reflection
and in the future she cries
for that she has chaotic mind and rotten hands.
unintentionally hurt the people around you till they despise you and left.
Cara May Dec 2016
Melancholic soul
born from
comparison of superficial beauty
from the society.
Made her sing melancholic songs
and howl at the stars at night; crying and wishing she could
be Aphrodite.
being compare to other girls is hard especially the pretty girls
Cara May Feb 2017
You're the reason
I write bad poetry.
Because you're
on my mind constantly
so I have to write you down
because you made me
feel
and I'm brimful
of emotions and words
because of you.
It was a curse to have you
in my life
but you're also the muse
to my beautiful poems.
Cara May Jun 2017
Your words cloths in sugar

sweet to my ear; to my soul.

Your words are sweet yet are made of fire

and my cold heart fell for the treacherous warm.

My head is giddy full of your red roses words

and I'm basking in your words like a moon shining on me.

But I know you're lost and your soul is blue. Now.

and I'm the red wine

soon will be forgotten when you're red again.
Rebound, second option.
Cara May Mar 2017
The velvet part of me
is my enemy.
My tears are inexpensive;
I cried at littlest things.
I cried listening to slow songs
I cried watching indie movies,
sometimes cartoon.
I too cried reading novels
and
I cried when people left.
I wish I wasn't fragile
as butterfly's wings.
I wish I don't stay on the ground; to not feel too much
but high on the cloud nine; to feel less.
Cara May Sep 2016
Here's a story.
I saw him standing on the hallway
while walking
and I caught myself being a Cheshire cat.

oh lord,
what a Greek God he is.
Gravity just pulled my heart and my soul into the earth core,
I admired his pretty face,
and my mind clouded by lust.

The second time I saw him,
I still caught myself being a Cheshire cat.
superficial infatuation
Cara May Nov 2018
You loved classic rock love songs
but you've never loved me like the lyrics...
One day I found out
we are in The Three of Wands tarot card relationship...
I understand now...
He told me he likes listening to the classic rcok love songs but the way he treated me were opposite and one day I found out, I was only his side chick... I was devastated and.. now I understand, all the songs were for his main chick.
Cara May Jun 2017
Cold midnight air nudging me
With memories of a room
Painted and built
With bitter sweet memories
Where our bodies and souls collided.
I was in the past that night
Echoed by your laughs
And the smell of the room; smell of you
Vividly fills my lungs
And I'm cried
Because that was 2 years ago
And I knew
you're someone else's now.
Memories
Cara May Oct 2016
I found myself draw
a scene of perhaps my future.
my deepest desire
my subconscious.
a scene of two bodies and souls colliding.
Cara May Jul 2016
You're a sunflower.
I'm the crestfallen.
All I can see are colours
when I'm looking at you.
Unalike me, i'm all grey and black.

You remind me of
the missing part of me.
The me I was looking for
all this while.

Everyday
I saw you,
closer yet far.

You're like the missing puzzle
i'm yearning for,
that I can't possessed
that I wanted to trace with my fingers,
but I can't.

because,

your infatuation are on others,
that I can't compare.
Out of my league crush.
Cara May Jul 2016
Darling, I liked you,
You've done nothing but,
Unexpected, my soul is drawn to you,
I'm sorry I liked you,
I'm sorry I hurt me.

You're flawed but you're flawless,
You are a piece of eccentric art,
I liked it.
I'd keep you.
About having a crush on someone.
Cara May Oct 2016
He loves watching her dancing
in her red dress
with champagne in his hand.
People said he's no good for her
because he loves rock songs
and she loves pop songs.
He is her soul.
She is his trophy.
She loves him on her lonely cold nights
where daddy dancing with other girls.
Cara May Sep 2016
I had Daisy in my hand
but I let her wilt.
because I was too busy searching.
now that she's gone,
she might be the one I'm looking for.
Daisy - friend
Cara May Feb 2017
To be the daughter of sadness
Is exhausting
My soul is worn out
Everytimea my tears drop.
And the worst part
it's eternity. For now.
I don't know when will this melancholic feeling disappear.
Cara May Apr 2018
my heart pacing in steady states,
beating the same as the days
we were strangers
when we were unison
in status
but not in mind, heart and soul.
Cara May Sep 2016
Dear him.

I want it to be like in the movies,
love at the first sight.

Like how Augustus saw Hazel Grace,
like how Adam saw Mia.
I want you to keen me for my beauty.
The beauty only you can see.
I want you to keen me for my passion.
The passion some people hard to understand.

I want it to be dinner in romantic restaurants,
I want you to give me your jacket when it's cold,
I want you to walk me home.

I want you to talk with me bout life,
about how the world was created,
gazing the stars together,
singing with me,
and hold me in your arms all night,
so I can listen to your heartbeat.

I know it's too much,
but I want it just like the movies.
just a sappy wish.
Cara May Sep 2016
I saw dolls on runways:
the world pavements
often fond by many
some lost their insanity in chasing them,
some hurting being dolls' tissue.

I knew dolls,
and the beauty their possessed are an illusion for the eyes,
a feast for the eyes,
for those who are tricked adore them
for those who knew,
they sculpture sentiments of adoration.

For those who aren't are forgotten,
unseen of the rare beauty,
and grace
shield by the rib cage,
a goddess,
waiting to be discovered by the lucky ones.
the beauty of the soul and superficial beauty.
Cara May May 2017
She drinks the soul of innocence
to fill in the void
every night like her favorite red wine.
She couldn't bear the emptiness
so she poured words
and lures the souls
and devoured them,
dismisses the fact she'd ****
their hearts.

She drinks the soul of innocence
to fill in the void
every night like her favorite red wine.
She couldn't bear the numbness
so she touches their skins
and kisses their necks
and turned them blue,
dismisses the fact they'd ****
her with diseases.

She is lost...
Cara May Jul 2016
I still remember that day,
that one day we met,
it keeps on haunting me,
till this day.

I still remember that day,
when your eyes pierce into mine,
deep warm sensation embrace me,
I felt welcomed.

I still remember that day,
when I looked into your eyes,
I found home,
I found acceptance.

But until this day,
you're just a memory,
a day to remember,
an ephemeral hot chocolate.
To the person who I thought I have a crush on.
Cara May Oct 2017
2 months my heart is in the darkest place
shattered by him
and finally
I can grow sunflowers in my garden
and burn the wilted roses he gave
and floats with waves of fate.
moving on
Cara May Sep 2016
By life you're altered,
bit by bit molded by fate's hand
and someday maybe tomorrow,
you'll come face to face with your own reflection
and you'll be surprised or terrified,
because the beast has conquered your angel
or
your angel has consumed your beast.
Life molded us into who we are
Cara May Jul 2016
I'd be yours,
past, present and future,
I'm bound to you.
Is this love?

I still remember that night
when you're in despair
I came to you
to be your pill.

I'd be there,
always.
I'd wipe your tears,
I'd cuddle your pain away.

In your 4 walls,
we shared laughs,
we shared tears,
we shared stories.

I'm content
by your child like laughter,
your deep blue eyes,
your chestnut hair,
tho your heart is not mine.

We used to sit,
gazing the stars,
and I realized,
your face luminous the most.

I'll be yours,
forever
tho she kept your heart.
Cara May Jul 2016
The azure skies are her day,
externally.
Katrina Tornado is her companion,
internally.

She saw rainbow in people,
externally,
sometimes internally.
Sometimes she saw blue in people,
red, grey even rainbow,
but she knew only grey and black in her.

She sees the world as a warm desolated place constantly.
People see the world as a warm place,
sometimes a cold place.
She has eyes of black coffee; empty.

She yearns for rainbow internally,
but she has walked the abyss,
so her heart is devoid of colours.

She's the ****** up ones.
When you view the world differently due to pass experience.
Cara May Oct 2016
I see a ghost in my room.
It started a month ago.
He appears everytime i'm alone.
with it comes sadness and longing and regret.
in absence of sight
I can also feel his presence in every smell in the room
and living room.
In every songs and movies.
In every void mind of mine.
missing someone
Cara May Mar 2017
i'm giddy
because of the oxygen
and the thoughts
I'm lost and i'm alone
crying and screaming to the sky
asking when will my time come
to not be alone in this forest of despair.
I'm just a human
and the person that I cared,
pushed me away
and one reaction
produce another chain reactions.
I'm so tired, my tears are almost blood
of being alone, crying alone,
bottling my emotions and feelings
OH GOD PLEASE,
GIVE ME A BREAK.
Cara May May 2018
Goodbye was your body
long gone before your love.
Goodbye was your voice
love, and words.
Swift as the wind,
excruciating as the sun flaring my skin...
Your ghost stayed,
lingering in my mind, and heart.
Pinching my heart,
every single day.
Unfair, it hurts.
break up *****.
Cara May Sep 2016
we were talking about our future and
our day
a few months ago
under a trillion stars
from midnight till dawn.
now,
we are just friends.
Cara May Sep 2016
our green stars and moon
are our witness
of bitter sweet memories.
A memory that could be infinity
but we are meant to be far apart
because you are the gasoline
and i'm the flame.
two chaotic mind once met
dwelled a brief chaotic seasons.
and yet serene...
Cara May Dec 2016
If you want to taste the color grey,
date me.
I'd shower you poems
and offer you warm chocolate everyday.
I'd color you grey
and you'd devoid me with color.
Cara May Feb 2017
I saw you again today and I'm confused. I asked god why? I have liked you and I wrote about you but this is reality and you're hers. And today after so many years and tears and bad poetry, I can look at you like I look at some strangers-I feel nothing.
Cara May Sep 2016
Another grieving session
Of people walking out of my life.
It's never easy. Never will be.
Cara May Dec 2016
The moon shines
Upon my skin.
Kisses my soul triggering
Memories we had;
Talking until the sun kisses the moon
Until haggard is our middle names
In the morning.
Now I wish we can still
Put haggard in our names
For now I'm only consumed
By the whorling memories
Frozen in time plummeting my heart.
Cherish everyone who you loved because losing them is hard
Cara May Jan 2017
The time past
and so do memories.
My mind is numb
and I felt nothing,
but sadness.
I'm empty
but my hand
and
my heart
are not unison.
I'm curious
but I'm scared
for I no longer can write
because now night time
is just darkness
and an empty room literally.
These past few weeks I felt sad and empty but somehow I don't have anything to write and I'm scared that I'll stop writing
Cara May Dec 2016
I destroy myself to feel alive
I destroy myself to feel sane
I destroy myself to feel content
Cara May Dec 2016
Liar.
The word men used
to describe pretty woman
with art on her face.
He loved her face
but not her heart
which is also an art.

Now he's full of rage
when she wiped the art
from her face.

For it should be beautiful
and admired
because she's naked; vulnerable
not despised.

She loved her art
for that is her nature
and men, remember to
See the art on her heart too.
Some guys claimed guys should not trust woman with make up because it's a lie that some of them thought of breaking up with their girlfriend after seeing them with no makeup.
Cara May Nov 2016
void heart is dangerous
works like a drug; hallucination
that every man are fond of the owner.
apparition of fairy tale
unbearable from day to day.
counting times to meet the other half
it's ludicrous, unbearable, embarrassing.
it's a part of fulling the void; unloved.
Cara May Dec 2016
be careful boy with your sweet words.
broken girls fall in love easily
because void heart is dangerous.
Be careful boy,
she'd **** herself in the name of love.
Cara May Jan 2017
Help...
I fell deep into my mind again.
suffocating,
as I  listen to the whispers of the red eyed.
Help...
I hated myself again; face and body.
suffocating,
when is this going to end.
Help...
I need help
I'm sad again.
Relapse again
Cara May Oct 2018
I'm paralysed on a field of wilted roses and sunflowers.
weeping.. on the cold ground.
Have you painted my skies winter solstice.
merciless and intentionally..

I'm drowning,
gasping for air, I'm cold...
help..
When you got played so hard by the one you loved... turns out i'm just a toy he played when he's bored.
Cara May Sep 2016
when you touch her do you think of me? because every silent night I think of you honey.
memories
Cara May Oct 2016
All this while I watered
the flowers you gave me
tho they have wilted.
But one day you came
and you broke the vase
and you asked,
"why did you watered the roses?"
then from that day I let you go
And I hope
you find what you're looking for.
When you made effort for people and they didn't do anything and then they asked why did we made effort for them at the first place.
Cara May Nov 2016
once was my sun
now is my dark cloud.
maybe we're not meant to be,
you're meant to be my semantic memories;
bitter and sweet.
I was there, when no one was there,
but you liked clown
and i'm the sad soul.
The last thing I send to the moon,
I miss you. I hope you miss me.
Cara May Oct 2017
I still remember
The sense of comfort
Came with your laughter
Sync with my laughter,
It sends electric down my spine
And butterflies in my stomach.
I missed that day,
I missed you,
I'm missing you.
Love is stupid
Cara May Dec 2016
I glimpse at you
And you spread glitter on my heart
I can't help but to write you
Because you're a masterpiece
Of skin.
The shade of purple
You projected  
Is beautiful as poetry.
Superficial attraction
Cara May Dec 2016
the way you played my heart string
send me to the abyss
shattering my heart into pieces.

you're killing me slowly
with your beautiful deathly diseased mind
and i'm your slave.

you're making me high in ecstasy
with your red rose words
and i'm addicted to your.
Cara May Oct 2016
just another day
where people walk out of my life.
I'm sad but I'm numb.
I'm a t peace but I'm devastated.
I hope things got better someday.
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