Only one type of ****** is illegal to show,
and wearing a skirt is an excuse for ****.
Having two X chromosomes somehow makes my life less important
than someone with an X and Y.
I am taught how to use makeup,
and told it is to attract men.
I am showed how to shave my legs,
and told that having underarm stubble makes me less of a women.
I am told that supporting feminism,
means I hate men when all I want is to be equal to them.

"you taking care of your sleep?"
asked you.
well yes, when you come I do.
but when you go,
*I forget, I forget, I forget...

There's something especially painful about being in love with what you can't have,
And it's another entirely to see and not touch, when missing someone has never hurt so **** much,
To remember your lips but never feel them again,
To catch your glance but always refrain,
From admitting I'm in love with the very poison that put me down,
But if being with you meant always falling then I'd never want to touch the ground,
What we had was a moment, a couple thousand seconds at most,
But you made blood pump through my veins: you brought to life a ghost.

new moon;
i love you’s echo through the room. some may call this the honeymoon phase, but i believed it
was so much more. as your arms wrapped around me, i pictures more of our future.

waxing crescent;
you met my parents and i met yours, we were intertwining our families one by one. We started to fight, which meant our relationship was good, right?

first quarter;
first three months went by and i just about wanted to cry all the time. you came home late with lipstick on your face.

waxing gibbous;
why, why, why, why, why?
i cannot do this with you.

full moon;
i am so angry, so so angry. i screamed and scream, all you say is “i can explain” explain what? how you killed me.

waning gibbous;
i gave you an inch, but you took a mile. you will never regain my trust, but i love you.

third quarter;
i started talking to someone new and they told me to leave you. i wanted to give you one last chance.

waxing crescent;
i’m leaving soon, i saw you with her, i cannot do this anymore.

new moon;
i am made new again without the curse of you. i will be me again soon.

life is a cosmic joke
he said
as he drained his glass of purpose
she watched as he paid and turned to leave
his movements proving his point
for what real purpose do we have
when all we do is live and die
and whisper to deities in the sky.

life is a cosmic joke
she said
when the till was short again
and drinks were missing from their bottles
as meaning was from her existence
he watched as she left
for the very last time
from a job that she hated
like the life he despised

life is a cosmic joke
he said
as he lit up his last cigarette
and sat in the cold outside his bar
next to a homeless man
with as little hope of a good long life
as anyone else he'd ever met
in a world of perpetual sunset

life is a cosmic joke
he said
as he warmed his hands
over a dying fire
with a young man
who was lost or some such
he took the ragged gloves off his hands
and tried to feel his fingers again
in vain
as all the world is
in trying to find some hidden bliss

life is a cosmic joke
he said
as he crossed another identical street
next to a woman or maybe a girl
who was crying about a lost lover
he walked and he wandered
but he never found it
even with all his persistence
as we never find meaning for our existence

life is a cosmic joke
she said
as she wept into my hair
mascara running down her cheeks
as she told of her terrible break up
and the way he used to hit her  
and how she was glad he was gone
but how she wished he would come back
her indecision mirroring that of all the world
do we matter or are we matter
which illusion is left to shatter

life is a cosmic joke
I wrote
over and over
like some meaningful quote
as if it mattered if it was in a poem
or if someone read it
it doesn't need to be said
to be known
it stands on its own

life is a cosmic joke

Why don't you see
What you do to me?
Why don't you see
My undying love?
My need for you?
My pain that you cause?
Why don't you see
That I love you?