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26.4k · Nov 2018
Underrated
Ruheen Nov 2018
Demons are just FALLEN ANGELS.
They fell
From HEAVEN to HELL,
And unlike angels,
DEMONS have a STORY to tell.
Good and evil.
It's just two sides of the same coin.
2.6k · Nov 2018
Pisces in Pieces
Ruheen Nov 2018
I'm a Pisces, so, here's me:

1. My heart is as cold as ice.
2. I fool people into thinking that they know so much about me, when in reality, they only know a fraction.
3. I'm afraid they'll devour me, so I devour myself.
4. I'm the saddest person, but I smile the brightest.
5. I'll never accept being second best for someone.
6. I'll either tell you exactly what I think, or stay silent.
7. I'll forgive, but never forget.
8. I want to escape reality, it's a gift and a curse.
9. Never underestimate me. I'm more than you think.
10. I can't drown my demons, they know how to swim.

I'm not who everyone thinks I am.
There's more to me than meets the eye.
Here's a Pisces in pieces.
I'm a Proud Pisces. Don't know if this is true for every other Pisces, but it is for me.
By the way, Pinterest helped a lot with the creation of this poem.
2.2k · Jul 2018
All That I Hear
Ruheen Jul 2018
I can hear their whispers
Even when they think I can't
The rumours they spread
The lies they tell

It keeps on going on
And on
And on
I can't make it stop
It won't stop
It's driving me insane

But it's all that I hear

I see them looking at me with disgust
Because of the way I dress
They give me titles all day, everyday
Because of my intellect

It can go on
And on
And on
For as long as it wants
It may drive me insane
But I couldn’t care less

Even if it’s all that I hear
1.7k · Nov 2018
This Is Normal, Right?
Ruheen Nov 2018
I

Hear

Voices

In

My

Head.

Am

I

Losing

My

Mind?

Save me.
Not actually going crazy, but sometimes I feel like I already am.
1.5k · Oct 2018
Deconstruction
Ruheen Oct 2018
Poetry is universal.
Everyone speaks it, even if by accident.
Yet, hardly anyone understands it.
No one notices
The hidden meanings in every sentence,
And every word.
Sometimes, not even the poet.
There is more to every poem than meets the eye.
But deconstruction can only go so far.
Everyone has something to hide. Some, in my opinion, just choose to hide whatever it is, in their poems.
1.5k · Feb 2019
Missed The Boat
Ruheen Feb 2019
One of the biggest chances
To follow my dream
Was just given to me.
But I didn't take it.
Only because I was trying to be a good friend.
A good person.
For once,
Why couldn't I put myself first?
I didn't just miss the boat.
It's more like I gave it up.
Happy Valentine's Day....not so much for me....
1.3k · Dec 2018
I'm a Writer
Ruheen Dec 2018
Someone asked me if I was an artist.
If I liked to draw,
Because I had a sketchbook.
I shook my head and said, "No."
Then I said, "I'm a writer,"
"I like to imagine."
I have a sketchbook and I draw only because I imagine my words turning into images. It's a form of inspiration for me.
1.3k · Jan 2019
Music To My Ears
Ruheen Jan 2019
How I lose myself in me,
When I hear your melody.
What a lyrical performance,
Like a swan upon the ocean.
Touch the sky, come back down.
No limits when you're around.
Your words are timeless.
Such a beautiful mess.
Even when it's raining emotions.
It's still such a lovely moment.
You leave it out in the open,
Even though you’re broken.
Yout fight all you fears,
You fight all your tears.
I hear you, even when you disappear.
'Cause your voice is music to my ears.
Originally a song (As usual). Figured it could work both ways.
I don't know what compelled me to write this. Maybe it was the amount of healing hearts I've seen. Maybe it was the amount of love.
This is something different because it's not about loneliness. It's about having someone. It's about how much someone means to you. You accept all their flaws even when they don't. You're there for them, always, and their opinion matters to you. They still mean so much to you, even when they're gone.
This is like nothing I've written before. It's sort of....less dark..?
:)
1.2k · Jan 2019
Reflection
Ruheen Jan 2019
I look in a mirror.
I see my reflection.
Staring back at me.

I look in a window.
I see my reflection.
Running from me.

I look in the water.
I see my reflection.
It's rippling.

But all this time.
When I see my reflection.
My reflection is the wall behind me.
...
1.1k · Oct 2018
Perfection
Ruheen Oct 2018
If we always wanted perfection
We would never be satisfied.

PerfEctiOn doEsn'T MeAn sAtisFactIon.
Nothing is perfect and no one really ever wants perfect.
1.1k · Dec 2018
I'm Not Yours
Ruheen Dec 2018
I'm visibly invisible,
Innocently uninnocent,
Bitterly bittersweet,
Scarily beautiful.
I'm misunderstood, yet understood.

I'm a lot of things, but I'm not yours.
So many people think that they know me enough to label me, to tell me what to do, to tell me what's wrong or right. They don't know anything. I don't belong to anybody.
1.1k · Oct 2018
Hidden
Ruheen Oct 2018
I say that I'm happy.
I say that I'm fine.
But shouldn't it be obvious that I'm not?

Of course not.
I've been hiding my pain for years.

I think I'm a pro.
Because I'm dying inside,
And no one knows.

Pain is hidden behind a smile.
Everything else, behind a wall.
...
1.1k · Dec 2018
Rest In Pieces
Ruheen Dec 2018
Goodbye, everyone.
The girl I used to be is gone.
All that's left is her pieces.
Too many left to miss.
Now a dark abyss,
Her mind still exists.
I would say she's better off dead
But she's still stuck in my head.
Now my fears are constantly fed.
There's so much I regret.
She's broken,
Too broken to fix.
She won't come back,
So you're stuck with this.
Rest in peace, old me.
While I rest in pieces.
The pieces you left behind.
The pieces you never needed.
The old me is gone, but she's still here. In the back of my mind feeding my fear of not being good enough because she was good enough. I changed a lot and I can't go back even if I wanted to. I can't be that person again...I don't how.
1.0k · Aug 2018
They're Not Just Nightmares
Ruheen Aug 2018
They're not just nightmares.
They won't let me sleep
And I'm not making an excuse,
But you don't get that.
I can't even close my eyes
Because I'm scared.

I'm scared
But I don't wake up screaming.
I just lie there
Like a corpse.
I feel like one too.
Because I'm cold.

Sometimes I feel
Hands clawing at my throat.
I feel like I'm breathing dirt.
Like I'm six feet under,
But I'm still breathing.
That's how I feel.

I'm not scared, I'm petrified.
Don't you see?
They're not just nightmares.
Part of the reason I don't get nine hours of sleep.
1.0k · Sep 2019
Spiral
Ruheen Sep 2019
Aren't we all
Out of control
Spiraling up the towers
And tumbling down the markets

What we need, we can't get
What we don't, we get
What we want, we don't
But what we want, we get

We fear, we fight
Our worries rise
We're left with so much
But nothing at all

We get up and find
Claws in our way
As if we weren't already
Bruised enough

Aren't we all
Out of control
We fear for us
And no one else

So, when we spiral, we spiral as one.
Well, we're spiraling. 'We' isn't us 'we'. It's them 'we'. Well, sometimes it's us 'we', but anyway. Does that make sense?
1.0k · Feb 2019
Losing You
Ruheen Feb 2019
I've lost so many people.
I can't help but feel like I'm losing you too.
Maybe I already have.
.
823 · Sep 2018
In The Mirror
Ruheen Sep 2018
What do I see when I look in the mirror?
I see a broken girl
Who's suffered lies.
I see a crying girl
Who's dead inside.
I see a bleeding girl
Who blames herself
And is blamed by everyone else.

What do I see when I look in the mirror?
I see a girl
Who may have lost hope.
I see a girl
Who's just afraid.
I see a girl
Who doesn't want to hide.
I see a girl
Who's been through too much
And is still alive.

In the mirror
I see myself,
Darkness and pain combined.
I don't actually know if I wrote about myself.
Maybe I did.
821 · Mar 2019
Puppet
Ruheen Mar 2019
Without you, I fall limp.
I’ve got no mind of my own.
Dead, soulless eyes.
You are my home.
I’m a puppet on your strings.
Every movement you control.
Every word I say.
Everywhere I go.
When I break free,
You reel me back in.
Can someone help me?
I’m not really asking.
I'm there for everyone to see.
Center of attention.
But it's the puppeteer they care for,
Not his invention.
Turn me into the perfect doll.
No complaints.
I'll follow you blindly.
No restraints.
You're the leader,
And I'm the follower.
You're in front of the line.
And I'm just trailing behind.
When you want to be free...
But at the same time, you don't.
805 · Sep 2019
When Did I Last
Ruheen Sep 2019
When did I last really laugh?
I can't really remember.
But I want to.

When did I last cry?
Just yesterday I believe,
But I don't know why.

When did I last yell?
Does it count if it
Was only in my head?

When did I last break?
An hour, ago I'm afraid.
No, maybe, I think.

My final question:
When will I last,
Do all of the above?/
....ok then.
788 · Mar 10
Deafening
Ruheen Mar 10
Crank up the volume,

So you can't hear a thing,
So nothing can get through,

And nothing can get out,

And you can't hear yourself,
And then you fall asleep.

Isn't that just the best thing,

That you could feel?
Wherever you are,

That peace and quiet?

Because when the music's loud
Your thoughts are silent.
...
786 · May 2019
TrageDIES
Ruheen May 2019
Happiness dies
        Excitement dies
Love dies
              People die.
                                  .
                        ­               .
                                           .
                                   And we get over it,
But our hearts don't.
                                  And
                                      so
                                        our  
                  ­                            souls
                                                      die.
Just a thought I played around with.
786 · Sep 2018
Where Do I Belong?
Ruheen Sep 2018
I am a lost cause.
A human without purpose.
Where do I belong?
Even wanderers have a category.
768 · Nov 2018
Void
Ruheen Nov 2018
Nos autem non in vacuum cucurri caeca.
Perdidit in tenebris sumus.
Ex visus, ex animo.
Nos iam esset desperato.
This is a poem in my favorite language: Latin.
Things just sound better in different languages, don't you think?

Translation:
We didn't run in blind
We were lost in darkness
Out of sight, out of mind
We were already hopeless.
751 · Feb 2019
No Reason
Ruheen Feb 2019
"Why are you crying?"
"Because I have no reason to be happy."
Happy birthday to me...
741 · Jul 2018
Bitter
Ruheen Jul 2018
Bitter cries, loud sobs
Faded tears, make it stop

Bitter taste, salted cheeks
Sweet lips, let me be

Bittersweet, open wounds
Lost fears, in empty rooms

Bitter cries, bitter taste,
Bittersweet, it’s all fake

Bitter cries, bitter cries
Please just leave with all your lies

Bitter taste, bitter taste
I want you gone, but I miss your grace

Bittersweet, bittersweet
Without you here, I feel incomplete

Bitter cries, bitter taste
Bittersweet, my heart’s encased
703 · Mar 2019
Finally...!
Ruheen Mar 2019
I finally screamed.
I finally cracked.
Am I meant to feel better?
Am I? I thought I was going to feel better. Lighter. Like I wasn't lying to everyone around me about how I felt.
Whatever.
697 · May 2019
Choices
Ruheen May 2019
Too many
Too little
So much time
Not enough time
There's two
So you have two
There's one
So you have none
                                                            ­                                Overwhelming
                    ­                                                                 ­                              Or
                                                              ­                                                Calm
            ­                                                                 ­                                  Easy
                                                            ­                                                       Or
                                                                ­                                              Hard
              ­                                                                 ­                    Unbearable
                                                      ­                                                             Or
                                                                ­                                     Endurable
                                                       ­                                         Unbelievable
                                                                ­                                                   Or
                                                                ­                                         Possible
                                                        ­                                         Unbreakable
                                                     ­                                                              Or
                                                                ­                                         Delicate
You have to choose
Even if you don't want to choose
Because you have a choice
Even if you don't know you have a choice

                                                                                                     Indecisive
                                                                                                                   Or
                                                                                       Just not right now
                                                                                                  Life is hard.
It really is.
696 · Feb 2019
You Never Listen
Ruheen Feb 2019
I tried speaking to you today.
You were right next to me,
But you weren't listening.
Its not like you ever do anyway.
No one ever listens.
...
695 · May 2019
Bookworm
Ruheen May 2019
If you see a girl reading,
And she is lost in that world of words,
Do not get up and bother her,
For you are blocking
Her path of escape
Into a world where people are allowed
More than a few moments of happiness.
So let her stay
Away from this world, we call reality,
Because that may be all she has.
Seriously, do not bother me when I am reading, otherwise, I will burn you alive.
Or I'll drain your body of blood and hang it up somewhere for all to see, kind of like a warning.
Or   I'll poison you with laundry detergent and watch as you throw up blood.
Or I'll just repeatedly slash at you with a butcher's knife until your face becomes unrecognizable.
Or.....if you're a guy, I'll just simply kick you where it hurts the most.
AND if you're a girl, I'll just make your life a living hell - rumours, secrets, drama, you know the usual.
:)
How's that? Too much?
691 · Feb 2019
One Day
Ruheen Feb 2019
One day someone will care.
One day someone will pick you.
One day you'll be happy.
One day.
One day.
One day.
I'm sick of waiting for one day.
When is it gonna come?
It could be a long time from now.....and waiting isn't fun.
...
668 · Nov 2019
Blood On My Lips
Ruheen Nov 2019
There is blood
Dripping from my lips
'Cause I bit my tongue too hard

I got a hit
And a miss
'Cause I got bad aim and I went too far

There is air
Leaving my lungs
'Cause I feel too much too fast

Now I can't laugh
For a month
'Cause I want my oxygen to last

There is blood dripping from my lips
And the drops fall like rain
Making patterns on the carpet

Let the blood fall from my lips
The air will come right after
And I don't care

Let it drip
We've all got to fall
And I think this is it.
You heard me. Rather you read me....nevermind.
643 · Jan 2019
Walking Away
Ruheen Jan 2019
Maybe we should just put down the puzzles
And leave it all behind.
Everything would be so much easier,
If we could just walk away.
.
.
.
Well, when someone figures out how to do that,
Let me know.
Because walking away is the hard part.
Everything would be so easy if we could just walk away from our hectic lives, but walking away.....too hard.
630 · May 2019
Dead Daisy
Ruheen May 2019
It's never I want to
It's always I have to
I need to
Be free

They pick me
They throw me
In a pile of dirt
A lonely daisy

Surrounded by roses
Red trickling down their thorns
I'll do what they do
I'll bleed

I'll never be a rose
I'm stuck in the ground
While they're in glass vases
Staring down at me

They're words get stronger
They're actions speak louder
My cuts get deeper
On the edge of insecurity

Soon I won't be breathing
Oh, the irony
In the middle of roses
A dead daisy
Yeah. Well... Yeah.
630 · Feb 11
Closer Than Before
Ruheen Feb 11
I hate them,
'Cause sometimes
They drain me
Of all my
Energy.
Of all my
Loneliness,
Sadness,
Anxiety,
My worries.
I hate them,
'Cause sometimes
They take away
All of my
Friends.
Now that
We're all
Closer than before.
We really are.
It's a part of me.
I don't want people to take away something that's a part of me.
I hate it sometimes, but I also can't live without it.
614 · May 2019
Rain
Ruheen May 2019
~

The cloud cried heavy tears,
While the trees celebrated, for they began to grow new leaves.


~
I love the rain.
601 · Sep 2019
Nonexistent
Ruheen Sep 2019
Permanent scars

Temporary hope

Temporarily permanent life

Nonexistent, really.
...do you get it?
595 · Jan 2019
Black Rose
Ruheen Jan 2019
Black rose,
There's no hope.
The colors fade away.
All there's left is pain.

Black rose,
Let it go.
There's nothing else left.
Watch the flower melt.

Black rose,
Don't you know?
Don't be crying.
Create a silver lining.

I'd rather be dead,
Than stuck in my head.
Drained of color.
It can't get any duller.

Like a black rose,
I let it grow.
I let the darkness
Engulf me long ago.
...
584 · Apr 5
Disposable
Ruheen Apr 5
Castles are only walls
made to look pretty.
Kingdoms can only fall
because they aren't that pretty.
You treasure decorations
over things that
do their job.
Because
they are disposable
and beauty
is not.
...
584 · Jul 2018
I Don't Know
Ruheen Jul 2018
I don't know
Why the wind blows
Or how far the stars go

I don't know
Why winter is so cold  
Or why I'm left alone

I don't know
Why the wind strokes my skin
Or why the birds sing

I don't know
Why I yell
When I have nothing to tell

I don't know
581 · Jul 2018
Why Would I?
Ruheen Jul 2018
Why would I want
The wind to grasp my hair?
For if it does
It may take me too.

Why would I want
To chase the stars
If they only crave attention?
I have better things to do.

Why would I want
To warm him in winter?
For I am also cold
As am I alone.

Why would I want
The birds to sing my songs?
It is music to only their ears.
Not to my own.

Why would I want
To yell so loud
When I have nothing to say,
And it is pointless for you to hear?

Why would I?
580 · Mar 10
CIRCLES
Ruheen Mar 10
I don't want to do anything
.
.
.
Because I can't see
Past the trees
That stand in my way

It's too dark
They're too tall
And everything looks the same

I'm going round in circles
And everyone keeps telling me it's worth it
I'm going round in circles
And I still don't believe it

I'm going round in circles
Nothing is changing
Everything is spinning
And it's still hurting

I'm going round in circles
I just wanna go straight
So I see the light in the tunnel
And I go towards it

I'm going round in circles
.
I just want to get somewhere
.
But I'm a little dizzy
.
So, instead, I'll just stay here
.
.
.
...
576 · Jan 2019
It's Kinda Funny
Ruheen Jan 2019
It's kinda funny.
Strangers, online,
Know more about me
Than people
I've known my
Whole life, do.
Y'all know me better than anyone else.
546 · Sep 2018
Fragile
Ruheen Sep 2018
"I'm a tough nut to crack.
Nothing can break me."
Is what I used to say.
Before they got into my head
And led me astray.

I'm as fragile as glass
                And I've already shattered.
                                           I'm as fragile as grass
                                                           ­ And as bruised and battered.

                    You can't break me because I'm already broken.
I was going to write more, but I just...didn't.
538 · Jan 2019
I'll Tell You.
Ruheen Jan 2019
I'll tell you a story,
It's gonna be good.
A boy and a girl
Wishing for what they could,
Never have,
Even though they should.
And in the end
We know they would.
I'll tell you a secret.
But don't always believe it.
Life isn't like that.
It's not that easy.
People are broken,
And are never happy.
I'll tell you a lullaby,
I'll sing it for you.
It's better than all the lies.
But what can you do?
For every predictable book, movie, or whatever. Something unique would be good too. I don't just want any generic story. I want something different.
532 · Aug 2018
Running
Ruheen Aug 2018
I was caught off guard
I never saw it coming
Why is this so hard?
Why am I still running?

I keep running
But my problems don't disappear
I'm even more scared
I have more to fear

I'm so tired
I've been running for too long
Do I fight back?
Or should I just stop?

I'm still running, but it doesn't solve things.
It just makes them worse.
Have you ever wanted to just run away? From everything? Your problems, fears and secrets? Reality?

You can, but not for long. It won't help.

Avoiding the mistakes you've made makes you seem a lot more guilty than you are.
531 · Jun 2019
Tattoo
Ruheen Jun 2019
Ink is thicker than water
Ink just lasts a little longer

A line in the dark
A line of light

A permanent scar
Not a permanent life

Rite of passage
Or open wounds

Closed doors
To open rooms

A layer below your skin
The needle goes deeper within
.
511 · Nov 2018
Locked In
Ruheen Nov 2018
No one can get in.
Nothing can get out.
My mind is a closed door.
It's all locked in.
The more people I let in, the more people can just walk out.
I'm a sociable person, but I don't trust easy.
509 · Jul 2018
inVISIBLE
Ruheen Jul 2018
It’s like I’m here but I’m not
They only see me when they want to hurt me
It’s like they’ve sewn my lips shut
I only speak if I’m spoken to

My screams are soundless
I want to disappear
The pain is endless
Nothing to make it easier

My tears have dried
The pain has dulled to a throb
This is normal now
My fears are lost

No one comes to my rescue
Because in their eyes I don’t exist
And what do I do
I move on and I survive
505 · Mar 2019
Disappear
Ruheen Mar 2019
I don't run.
I disappear.
When I do,
You won't see me for a while.
That's why you haven't seen me for a while! It's confusing, but it's me.
494 · Nov 2018
Friendship
Ruheen Nov 2018
There is a time you realize
That you only called someone your friend
Because you saw them five days a week.

Friendship shouldn't be based on frequency.
It should be based on understanding.
Just a thought I had when someone I thought was my friend left me for the "popular crowd". She wasn't really a friend. I barely knew her and she didn't know me. She knew what everyone else knew.
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