I'd like to light up your life,
Because my body next to yours couldn't feel any more right.
I wanna make you happier than you've ever felt before,
I'm the most real person you could meet, and you melt my heart right down to the core.
But I still sleep on the floor,
I never got used to having much more,
Scrapes, bruises, muscles so sore.

I'll always admit to my drinking,
Tis a problem in need of some serious fixing,
But I've only had 2 bottles of wine,
And yea, I may have forgot to sit down and dine
But this moment is one I don't want to leave,
Even though I'm younger, and can be sometimes naive.

When I awoke this morning, I dreamt of your skin,
How good it felt on my lips, how bad it made me want to sin.
Why does your body feel so good on mine?
It makes me feel so ******* safe, so blissful, so fine.
Sun spilling over your quirky smile,
With your hands on mine; I hadn't felt this good in a while.

When it comes to battle scars, yours may even outnumber mine,
From the inside out, everything was not always fine.
But our mannerisms collide; must be some kind of sign,
I see so much wisdom in your dark brown eyes,
I see a very good soul, not one who could ever tell lies.

So, if I could cry you a river,
Could we sail away?
In a cute little skiv,
Somewhere our inner demons could even have a nice space to play?
Like a nice little lake,
Our own little piece of paradise,
Just ours to take.
Or, we could run wild through vast, grassy fields,
By the seat of our pants, high on love, we can laugh away the bad feels.
The choice is ours, all you have to do is take my hand,
I only ever wanted to be with just one man,
And there's many things in this world we may never understand,
But you don't find people like you very often,
Something most of us have totally forgotten.

Life can be so short, so why not take a chance,
In a tango for two, I do need a partner to dance,
Can it be you?
Is this a love real and true?

I once was good to you,
And you to I,
But it seems that time may have passed us by.
Pulling me in with soft words,
Promising you'd never leave me hurt,
I trusted you with the vulnerable person I am,
Then one day you just no longer gave a ****.

I know sometimes I forgot to really drink you in,
Your taste, your smell;
Only to my needs did I attend.
I quickly forgot about when we were just strangers,
In no way could this ever be toxic, put us in any real danger.
Your presence got me so ******* high,
Like I could conquer anything, reach the **** sky....

But now,
I'm lying here on the floor,
Head spinning so hard I can't even see the door,
So messed up I can't walk,
But oh god do I still want more,
Treating me like some ******* *****,
I forgot how you always leave me so sore.

When did **** get so real,
And why is it so hard to finish a meal?
There's this poison in my gut,
Trying to escape my body; telling me I've had enough,
And so again late this morning,
I'll breathe, choke, and heave without warning,
Just so you can come again,
Destroy my world once more, no longer as my friend,
But my kryptonite you'll be; making these bad days never seem to end.

As long as I'll still drink you in,
I know you'll try to eat me alive; every now and then.
But there's been worse battles fought,
And worse places to drown thoughts,
All the oceans and rivers now seem larger than life,
And to think; you saved me from a knife.

I'll swim amongst places different from just here from now on,
Places where I can cry, and my feelings don't feel so wrong,
But forever and always will you try to pull me in like a song,
And stronger will I get, so we both don't have to be forever gone.

I wanna call you so bad,
But I feel so guilty, I feel so sad.
The road ahead seems to be dancing,
Or I may just be high, drunk, and in need of romancing.
I'm tripping ***** on this warm lonely night,
In need of an ear, I see none of my friends in sight.
I want so bad to run far away from here,
But I cant run from my thoughts, and my enemy will always be near.
As rain falls from the sky,
And lovers start to get lost in eachothers eyes,
I figure it must be February again,
But here I am alone, with a broken heart in desperate need of a mend.
I want to feel pain, shake away these blues leaving me so numb,
I cant seem to find a connection, I feel like a fool, so blind and so dumb.
I have a heart of gold I'd like to share with someone emotionally sound,
Though I'm worth the fight, these walls are hard to break down.
A hopeless romantic I may be,
No one seems to want to get to know the real me,
I promise I've got endless stories to tell,
My trust is priceless, something I could never sell.
So I ask you to come take a chance at something great,
I can be your rock, I can be your escape.
And I hope you will anchor me too,
Make the drinks slow way down, become very very few.
But tonight I'll lay alone,
In a place I wish I could make feel like home,
And pray to not pick up this knife,
I dont wanna lose yet again another fight.

Here's that recurring pattern again,
I guess its justice with how I've treated others all the way up to this year's end.
I probably deserve this,
I can be on my way,
Watching what could have been fade away,
So many things I will miss,
Never again be able to have one more first kiss.
But still there's so many things I wish I could say,
Maybe its just not my time,
Or the maybe the standards are too high,
Whatever the reason,
I guess tis the season.
Happy holidays, may your loved ones be merry,
I'll be here singing love songs with my sweetheart; Absolut Cherry.

I've been drinking all day; call me an alcoholic, but I would say;
Liquor brings only the best words, on this wonderfully sad, yet sunny day.
I'd like to tell a story my friends,
One with many crazy things; adventures that could never end.
I like to caravan around drunk and high through this mess,
Sobriety is far away; carrying only despair and distress.
I want to tell you how I've come so far,
I like to brighten up my life with lights, and glitter; always available in the car.

My sweet, **** red 4 cylindered beast,
We've bonded so well, never could our connection cease.
But on this day without clouds in the sky,
Driving through the city coming down off a high,
I get a phone call; I smirk, and I cry, and I cry,
I just can't help but laugh at it all,
Never could I ever take this **** seriously; want to curl up in a ball.
My life is falling apart so fast,
I could end all this pain with an easy ***** induced crash,
But I'm going to meet someone for a drink,
I'll have to wash off these tears in the bathroom sink.

Staring down back at the glass in my hand,
I wish so much for to be a better woman.
But my mind isnt here with this girl,
It's watching from above, telling me to face to world.

And as she watched her world crumble in her hands,
She just laughed, took a drink, and continued on without even thought of that man.
Or of how much she had cried,
How much she wished this pain would subside,
If all is fair in love and war;
Don't we ever lose sight of what we're fighting for?...

Another night of the week,
Another time I can't find the energy to sleep.
Another's words cutting me deep,
Another night I lay alone and I weep.

Even though I'm confused and unsure,
I still believe I know what I'm looking for.
Wishing I could just jump into this bottle,
Go for a swim, or a drive; feel control over some kind of throttle,
But I'm drowning in my own sea of emotions,
Trying to ride out the tide, and go with the flow of this angry ocean.

I just like to chase away this feeling,
I no longer like to feel numb; emotionless and daydreaming.
This poison takes away the greater pain,
It makes me feel safe, it makes me feel sane.

And even though I'm scared to have my heart broken again,
I wish so much to be swept of my feet, to no longer be wary of men.
As much as I enjoy running wild and free,
I wish for someone to accept the real me.
We may not all get our happy ending,
But at least I wear my heart on my sleeve; I've never been good at pretending.

I'll sip just once more this evening,
Then clean myself up, wash off this evidence of bleeding.
**** this feeling.
**** these tears; stinging,
And I guess **** all sleep, there won't be any dreaming.

When your thoughts are so jumbled,
And when your words come out mumbled,
A chill rises over your skin,
And the room might start to spin.
The moment you realize everything hasn't been how it seems,
You've been living a lie,
The time for nightmares is nigh,
They've taken over your dreams.

There will come a time when the tears will run dry,
And your heart will keep racing, making you feel like you could die.
But, please, not today,
I've got so much to do,
But I'm asking myself 'why should I stay'?
Is there anyone who really needs me more than life,
Can I have a good reason why I shouldn't pick up this knife?
Have I just been a distraction for you?
An escape from stress, loneliness, from feeling so blue?
Because I may not always see the silver lining,
But I'm not asking for much, I most certainly am not whining.
Is it so hard to care about another?
Someone else besides your father, sisters, or brother.

This world has become one filled with people in masks,
Hiding who they really are, making up pretend facts.
But I guess its strange I feel so at rest,
Except for this hole in my chest,
And this blood flowing down my body,
Then again, maybe I'm not the one who should be sorry.
Was I wrong to be so kind?
Should I have thought more about what you had in mind?
I'm just thinking in circles,
Why am I throwing myself through these emotional hurdles.
As a hopeless romantic by day,
And a sinner at night; I do have one last thing to say;
Do you feel mighty holding my heart in your hand?
Ripping it straight out of my chest, do you feel more like a man?
Because all I see is a coward,
I've got no clue why you feel so empowered.