An evening in November
Spent trodding over flattened grass
Between trees of a whispering orchard.
When the air is cold and sharp in your nose
And the sky’s aglow with gold,
When the night tastes sweet against your tongue
And the sun is pulled below,
Take a breath and make a wish
On the fading sunbeams between the orchard rows.

The lonely astronaut adrift in space made friends with the stars
Who gave him something to think about besides the chill in his arms
Who twinkled in tandem to the beat of his heart

“I have no one but these lights and they have no one but me
But because I cannot burn like they do,
I’ll drown in this infinite cavity”

The lonely astronaut surrendered himself to the void with a sigh
Who let him exist as a bystander to time
Who saw him as space debris and brushed him aside

So, you're sitting all alone feeling sorry for yourself,
Thinking you could do it if you were anybody else,
Like you stepped into the wrong vessel that you don't know how to steer,
When in reality, what stops you is your own pestering fear.

You're scared of tomorrow and ashamed of yesterday,
But time isn't on anyone's side anyway??
Hiding in your head will only repeat your vicious cycle,
And you know the things you need to finish are vital-

So stop fighting with yourself over when you'll get work done!
Because every night you say, "I haven't done enough."
It seems your most productive hours run from sunset to sunrise.
You went to sleep knowing that in half an hour, the birds will be awake outside.

Fix it, because you can't continue like this.
This isn't the sort of normalcy you miss.

If the galaxy came down in a tempest
And all the stars fell in the rain
I’d bottle up a supernova
And send it off your way.
Every morning during breakfast
I’d drink the Milky Way
And if ever the galaxy falls anew
We can barricade the storm drains.

Summer leaves so quickly. Wait! Come back. Give me more time, I meant to ask my friends to go on an adventure with me.
 
I was going to ask, "Can we make breakfast together? I'll wash the dishes afterward, then we can dress like the smiles we'll wear for the rest of the day.
“Let's go to the park, because I brought my camera and our eyes are still shedding the last of bits sleep, the morning sun keeps trying to kiss our noses through the treetops, and we look like tired angels.
“Then we can go to the elementary school playground and swing on the same sets like we used to, kicking higher and higher until we let the momentum die and our feet are back on the ground. The same slides will burn us, and the monkey bars will not accept our hands for the calluses they've lost.
“For lunch, can we bike down to the river and eat whatever we've packed in the shade under the bridge? It's rocky, but I know a flat stone where we can sit and count the ducks.
“When evening falls, let's go back home and throw blankets and pillows in the back of my car, drive under the yellow streetlights with the windows rolled down like some scene from a coming-of-age Sundance film."
I was going to ask, "Can we park under the stars and laugh until daybreak?"
 
Summer came and went and I watched it go.
Summer is past, and all I can do is try to imagine it all, then hit rewind.

Fascinate me
Gift me with a facsimile
Of a long-forgotten melody

Sing it to me
Play my heart's strings
In the ray of a full moon's beam

Epiphany
Of love in low lighting
Which ****** my mind with reverie

Cacophony
Fill my lungs with noise
Underneath a violent symphony

The silence in your head is drowning you
The waves of trivial regret crash into your senses, and everything snaps at once
Leaving you to sink in a muffled quiet
The white sting behind your eyelids is quickly replaced by a humming in your chest and a pounding in your throat
The feeling is weightless, but this feeling is also an anchor that hasn't yet touched the sand

The worst part is, you can stop the waves
You said, just this once, I'll let the suffocating emptiness in my head swallow me
But you said that last time
And you'll say it next time, too

(Because this feels as good as it feels crushing, and as right as it feels wrong.)