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4d · 19
spilling
soli 4d
the sand is spilling ocean
the sky is leaking sunlight
the earth is seeping life

and to those who have
sorrow escaping from
their heavy-lidded eyes,
do not hold it in.

the sand can't hold back the ocean
the sky can't contain the sun
and the earth can not prevent
a life from blooming with all its might.
Sep 26 · 33
Untitled
soli Sep 26
bright and glorious
we shine
Sep 11 · 37
Untitled
soli Sep 11
gentle spirit,
break my heart.
With kind words,
unspoken art.
Sep 5 · 28
child as i am
soli Sep 5
child-like i wanted to stay
as childish beliefs blow away
and my empty shell cracks
as the world of darkness
invades the light in my eyes
child, i wish i knew everything
yet nothing at the same time
i want to heal the world
of its bruises and scrapes
but i’m scared i will bleed
the shield will protect the wielder
but who will protect the shield?
Sep 1 · 85
Untitled
soli Sep 1
Cutting my neck open wide
to let you see and touch
what is and was inside.

Staring into universes
to taste what blessings are
that will eventually turn into curses.

Gasping in the foul air
that your lungs provide;
you lure me into your lair.

Feeding me maggot-ridden,
crying, destructive and putrid words
lain under the depths of your tongue.

Falling into my eyes
a devastating force of gravity;
falling into your own lies.

Your empire will sink
and your kingdom will scream
for its own destruction.

And until you admit your defeat
you will never walk in light
and I will no longer
stand by your side.
Aug 28 · 119
FALL
soli Aug 28
FALLING into darkness
SPLASHING in your pools
of murky depths and nightmares
where your ghosts roam free
and feed on your flesh.


LOVING the configuration
ADORING the form you've taken
in a twisted, perverted way;
your eyes called me their own
just to rob me of my dilation.


DESPISING the height I had to fall
HATING the way my skin curled in
when I hit the pools inside of you;
soft and malformed in the north
deceiving astronomy in the south.


WALKING in your atomical views
RUNNING with your wolves
was pleasurable to my psyche
but just a sheep in wolf's clothing
you shed your lies in the darkness.


HERDING the doves in my soul
SHAPING my head to fit in yours;
I am not of the essence of clay,
I can not force my spine to bend
over and backwards, under and forwards.


SO just let me swim in your smoke
—you're cyanide dreams
too poisonous to love
right now.
Aug 21 · 37
banquet
soli Aug 21
there's a seat waiting for you
at my dinner table.
there will be a feast.
my soul will be the main course
and my heart will be dessert.

i hope you come.
even though you'll be
the death of me.
Aug 16 · 58
stargaze
soli Aug 16
as brightly lit as i am,
i was forgotten
among the stars.
a ship lost in moonlight
searching for a skylight
that will never reach the dawn.
take my hands,
and do not regret
pulling me to shore.
Aug 10 · 119
Untitled
soli Aug 10
you have golden fingertips
and the touch of midas
in your hands.
Aug 7 · 124
Untitled
soli Aug 7
Don't get me wrong,
Even though I loved him,
He never dictated my happiness.
He just—he made me happier.
Aug 4 · 35
Untitled
soli Aug 4
how ironic is it
that a girl
who gets so easily seasick
and is terrified yet hypnotized
by deep waters,
is so perpetually
in love
with the ocean?
Aug 1 · 57
Untitled
soli Aug 1
i have a horrible habit
of writing poetry about
the boy i love.
Jul 31 · 47
harvest
soli Jul 31
my tears
watered
the roots
of my love
for you.
so please
don't let me
waste away.
harvest me
when i'm
ready.
Jul 30 · 107
Untitled
soli Jul 30
it was then that i realized
if he couldn't bother
treating me like a queen
then he had no right
to stand in my kingdom.

let another queen
decide your fate,
my love.

you waste my time.
Jul 28 · 180
Untitled
soli Jul 28
i am madly in love with you
so please
treat me well
whether you love me back
or not.
Jul 26 · 61
Untitled
soli Jul 26
When I tell you
That I'm in love with you
I will do so with a poem
Because that is the language
That I speak.
Jul 23 · 233
words; skin
soli Jul 23
you wrote your soul
on my skin
with a silken paintbrush
and sky blue paint––

i'm sorry.

i wrote my soul
on your skin
with a sharpened knife
and blood red paint––

i'm sorry.
Jul 20 · 160
breathe
soli Jul 20
let out the air you've been
holding in all your life.
you're free now.
you live in the clouds
with the sky as your lungs
and the sun as your oxygen
soak in the world's worth
and drop into the depths
of your endless blue soul
like a stone in the ocean
swim with the birds
fly with the fish
and breathe.
breathe.
you're alive.
so breathe
Jul 19 · 57
hug the sky
soli Jul 19
hug the sky
give as much love
as you would a puppy
because the sky
cries just like you
sleeps just like you
gets lonely just like you
because the sun and moon
are too far away
for the sky to talk to
hug the sky
and the sky
will hug you back.
Jul 19 · 487
Untitled
soli Jul 19
i can't say i won't cry
because of you
but i can say i smiled
because of you

and i will never
forget that.
even when
you forget me.
Jul 17 · 255
fireborn
soli Jul 17
i was born in fire.
i can not deny the heat in my veins.
but i am not ashamed
that every morning
i swallow the sun
so that the moon
can keep pulling
back the tide
and i let the fog
cover the sunrise
i drench myself in night
because i am left
not right.
cold water comforts my soul
the depth keeps me afloat
there is something beautiful
about a black-colored sea
but as fireborn as i am
there is no ounce of love
for the fire in me.
Jul 13 · 106
Untitled
soli Jul 13
Okay no
You're not obligated to think of me
But it still hurts when you don't
Jul 12 · 74
11:45 P.M. Exactly
soli Jul 12
It was 11:45 P.M. exactly
There was no more time
For any outrageous foolery.

You had to bring her home
By 12:00 no later and already
You had fifteen minutes to spare.

You stopped the car and sat
For a minute to listen
To her steady breathing.

She waits for you to say something
But you only look ahead
And listen to her breathing.

"Are you alright?" She asks you
And you reply with a smile
But to answer––it takes a while.

Maybe you don't want to admit it
But you're not alright.
Not alright with anything at all.

Not alright with the fact she's
Still with you right here
Right at this spot at this time.

Or maybe not with the fact
That her parents actually like you
And that her brother trusts you.

Does it scare you? Of course.
Do you want to believe it's real?
Of course. No gold ever mounted up.

But something still terrifies you,
Chills you to the cores of your bones
And makes your innards quiver.

Especially your heart.

But that's besides the point.
You had an imaginary woman
Stuck inside your head for years.

You're ashamed to say
You wouldn't let her out
Even though it's been so long.

She's banging at your forehead
Right now as you listen
To the other woman's breathing.

She wants out.
But you won't let her out.
She will stay with you.

No––she won't. Want to know why?
Because there's a better woman
Sitting right next to you.

She's beautiful, you know that's a fact.
She's sassy, you know that's a fact.
And you definitely know she's sweet.

So why is this other woman
The one stuck in your head
Still banging away? Trying to escape?

You know it's because you're scared.
The woman next to you? She's real.
You can touch her––she's real.

You're scared of real, aren't you?
You're scared that since she's real
She'll drag along heartbreak.

You're scared because you depend
On the woman inside your head
Far too much to be healthy.

She's fake. She won't ever hug you
Or kiss you or cuddle you or love you
She won't cry or laugh with you.

Why doesn't the imaginary scare you?
Is it because she can't ever leave you?
Is it because she's perfect?

No––obviously not.
You're not perfect,
So she's definitely not perfect.

So again, you ask yourself,
Why doesn't the imaginary scare you?
And why doesn't the real satisfy you?

It's bizarre, yes. You know that.
But seeing the woman next to you
Smile and touch your cheek,

It's terrifying.

Maybe you should leave
Maybe you should go
Hole yourself up in your room
And spend hours with the
Woman inside your head.
Maybe you should run
Before she can catch you,

Maybe––

"I love you." She suddenly says.
And you blink.
What did she say? I love you? To you?

"Why?" You ask with a cracked voice.
You don't deserve this.
You've been thinking about another woman.

"There are many things,
But I want you to know I do.
I really really love you."

She loves you?
Truly?

"Yes." She starts laughing because
Apparently you thought out loud.
You break into a smile at the sound.

She grabs your face and pulls you close.
"I love you. I love you. I love you."
And you start crying.

Because you can hear
The genuity in her voice
Clear as a sunny day.

And also,
It's now 12:01 A.M.
Jul 12 · 163
sunflower
soli Jul 12
from my mouth
grows a sunflower
with every breath
from my lungs
a vine entwines
itself around
my ears
and i can hear
the whisper
of all my fears
i lay in a bed of roses
silent broken and still
time is an icy wilderness
surrounding me
as my tears
fall frozen
to the ground
and the sunflower
bends it's head
into my darkness
and dwells there
instead.
Jul 8 · 47
walk
soli Jul 8
could we walk together?
hand in hand?
so that we don't stray
from our paths?
your very presence
comforts me
you're the ocean
to my sky
and i hope you'll stay with me
and walk, as the days pass by.
Jul 4 · 176
Untitled
soli Jul 4
hello poetry is quite inactive lately. where are all my fellow poets gone?
Jun 29 · 51
lovely
soli Jun 29
you are lovely
lovely for struggling
against a world who hates you
lovely for fighting
even when you're on your knees
lovely for walking a dark path
even though it costs your innocence
lovely for enduring
the cruel whips of your self-hatred
for you know no enemy
as wicked as yourself
but you are lovely
a glowing blue haze of victory
for you crawled all this way
through black ashen rain
through rampants of pursuers
through torrid heat and anger
to see the light and now
you can bask in the sun

you are lovely for enduring.
Jun 15 · 178
doubt the rain
soli Jun 15
i doubt the rain knows
the sadness in me
but it still makes for
happy company
Jun 11 · 125
Untitled
soli Jun 11
i want to stop loving you
the way i wish i could love myself
Jun 11 · 78
as wild
soli Jun 11
as wild as this ocean beneath my feet
as wild as these waves that calm me
as wild as this flower near the road
as wild as these hands that only hold
as wild as the sky way up above
as wild as these mourning doves
as wild as the wind from out the sea
as wild as the whispers calling me
as wild as this cherry blossom blooms
as wild as this duskblue moon
as wild as the wild spring in May
as wild as the heat from summer days
as wild as a frost during winter nights
as wild as these mountainous heights
as wild as the love in this heartbeat
everyone,
let us be.
Jun 11 · 102
adrift
soli Jun 11
my love–! you are starving my ocean.
my ocean breathes your oxygen
and rests in your soft calamaties
but you have pulled away
and my ocean meets nothingness
when it needs a gentle touch
my love, why do you stray so far?
i can only welcome you now
you hadn't let me say goodbye
but my love, no matter how long
you drift away into your ocean
i will still love you.
Jun 9 · 485
i want an ocean
soli Jun 9
to feed the strength of my storms
into a jar that you can carry
i want an ocean
to see the height of my waves
and find their beauty astounding
i want an ocean
to lift their feet from the sands
and wonder at the depth of me
i want an ocean
that i can be an ocean with
that i can admire too
so would you let it
be you?
Jun 4 · 63
blue
soli Jun 4
all i saw was blue in you
and my heart beat in beats of blue
when i saw that your ocean
was far away
Jun 3 · 33
hold me back
soli Jun 3
hold me back,

       please, hold me back

           otherwise

                 my fingers

  my voice,

my eyes,

my words


will tell the world
of my love for you.
Jun 1 · 129
dawn blue; dusk red
soli Jun 1
our friendship was a spark
until something changed
you stayed cold, i blew up in flames.
i suddenly realized my love for you
could not – would not be tamed.
one day my fire will die down
but all i can do now is starve it.
my unreversable love for you––
it is a deep dusk red
and a sorrowful dawn blue.
May 25 · 121
gold seepings
soli May 25
i bled gold and cherry blossoms
with every wound you gave me.
i cried flower petals and midnight
with every word you didn't say
i broke into pieces of cardboard
as you began to walk away.

and with every moment of hurt
that you gave me to remember
from my toxic mind they fall
gold seepings they are all.
May 24 · 105
farther away
soli May 24
with every step you took
it was a little farther away
each time you took a step
it was far away from me
May 21 · 93
young
soli May 21
i am young, i won't lie
responsibility hasn't quite kicked in yet.
my eyes are still wide and naive
but at least they're a little more open than before.
i am young, i won't lie
but i grow up a little faster each second
as the world delves into chaos.
it's a strange thing to yearn for adulthood
when i don't want to lose my youth.
i am young, i won't lie
halfway to thirty
quarterway to sixty.
i am young.
but
i'm not quite sure
i want to inherit
the earth yet.
May 21 · 334
desolate
soli May 21
you are my
flower
in a
desolate
world
May 19 · 44
daydream
soli May 19
it's a sunny day
within the clouds of my mind
the ocean greets us
as the waves say hello
the cherry blossoms near the road
whisper songs in the wind
inside the rain are millions
and millions of rainbows
your gaze is a torture
as caterpillars morph
into butterflies in my stomach
and you make me feel
like i could burn in water
May 16 · 87
waveside
soli May 16
if i sit by the waveside,
with nothing but a wave
to keep me company
and the rumble of the roars
of the furious ocean at the sky
if i sit by the waveside
with the wet between my toes
and the salt in my hair
and the wind in my sails
with the voice of the sea in my ears
if i sit by the waveside,
will you join me?
May 15 · 53
forget
soli May 15
it's so easy for you
to forget about me
but i still remember
every piece of gold dust
in your beautiful brown eyes
every oceanic wave of laughter
that you let loose into the sky
every inch of skin that i could see
of your face, neck, hands
every strong hold of your arms
brief as the feeling was
i still remember
though all i am to you
is a name
May 14 · 295
risky
soli May 14
it's risky to talk to you
because all i can do is smile
and i'm afraid
that you'll know
everything
that i'm
not telling
you
May 14 · 63
heartspill
soli May 14
could i spill my heart to you?
i promise it won't leave a stain
May 11 · 161
Untitled
soli May 11
his smile is the ocean
a roaring wave of life
it stirs awake the butterflies
borne inside my heart
May 11 · 136
Untitled
soli May 11
this pull
this pull to be near you
is stronger than gravity
and yet the weight
of my sorrow
is just as heavy
May 10 · 50
Untitled
soli May 10
and then i exploded
and my heart
melted
into
the
sand
while I
waited for
you to notice
me.
May 9 · 1.5k
Untitled
soli May 9
if only he knew
that every time
i look at him
i see a galaxy
a galaxy
too far
away
from
me.
May 6 · 250
Untitled
soli May 6
the rain came pouring down
the mountains fell to their knees
and you were still here with me
May 3 · 69
found
soli May 3
my choking words suffocated me
a hangman's rope around my neck.
their eyes were sunlit fires, staring at me
judgement and damnation aflame.
I cursed them, I cursed myself,
but again my words suffocated me.
I cried silent on the bathroom floor
in a heap of broken dignity.

I used to cut out my tongue
so I couldn't tell anyone my secrets
and I cut off my ears so that
I couldn't hear myself scream it.
I would lay on the floor, ignoring
ignoring the blood that poured
from my eyes–my mouth
from my ears and my heart.

I thought myself a single crack
a single crack in a castle made of glass
a mistake in perfection made
a stormy day, a moment ignored.
I groaned at my reflection
and an empty soul stared back.
I rained a world's worth of water
no sunshine came and no flowers bloomed.

but you saw me and embraced me
you danced in my rain and I saw
how beautiful you danced in me.
you learned sign language for me
and taught me how to speak again
and washed away my blood.
you made my ugliness beautiful
and I found I loved my beautiful.
I would greatly appreciate constructive criticism for this poem if you could spare some time. This is my entry for a poetry contest and I want it to be the best it can be.
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