I wish I could say I love you
I'm sorry cause I don't
I'm broken cause I want to
I'm crying cause I won't

I've been hurt so badly
Been told one too many lies
My heart trampled by some losers
Who wore such a phony disguise

He knows I want to care for him
He knows my hearts been worn
I love just him oh so dearly
But still my pending emotions; torn

Like smoke in my lungs, it is an acquired taste that I could not bring myself to quit. And now that I have, the flavor is unprecedentedly toxic.
2. Your name is merely a catalyst to my relapse. You turned your head away from it then, and I know you will turn your head away from it now.
3. To hear that beautiful arrangement of letters coming from my own lips only reminds me of the genuine smile on your face that you can only have when I am gone. And every time it makes me wonder if I truly mean it when I say I am happy for you.
4. I cannot reconcile what is with what could have been. Maybe if I was still yours and you were still mine, it would be endearing to say your name.
5. When it's 4 am and I am falling apart in my half empty bed, I cannot find the breath to utter your name between sobs.
6. I have spent too much time pretending that your absence has had no affect on me that I have not yet grieved. But, I could never pity myself without shouting your name into an empty void.
7. Maybe I am only idealizing you, but his name left a bitter taste and I have been craving yours on my lips.
8. I cannot say your name because I know that if you were to turn your head in recognition, I'd get lost in those blue eyes and fall for you all over again.
9. There is no logic behind how I inherited the right to say your name. Since you have left, this complacency is eating me alive and I am only left to wonder why someone so beautiful would have ever touched a soul like mine.
10. I cannot speak of your name any longer because it is no longer my privilege. It is hers to say now.

i believe that life is a blessing and a curse
because i have felt so much joy and so much pain
i think life has a way of making us fear death
because there is always so much loss and so little gain
but from what ive had and what was taken
and what i know and what i assume
there is always going to be a brighter tomorrow
so much brighter than all this gloom
and i say that with my head held high
not fearing death nor wanting it to come
but living life like its meant to be lived
for our God, our Savior, the son.

Its the afternoon, and its still, I pick a few golden dandelions, because they are yellow, for you

I think too hard when I try to write for you, I want to be perfect

I think that my back aches and my mind is sore, but valentines day is wonderful

love is beautiful, and it is everywhere

you are the string of violin rolling through a pleasant gathering, a drum circle, whisking in the background and coating the fibre with rich resin

babe you are a peacemaker, make kings and vagabonds believe the very best

you laugh like elton john, carefree, with eyes up, bashful

Ilyse your name is unique and and so is your quality, keep on with me


love, seany

I know I always say you fell for me
But I know it was me that fell
And it was you who held my hand
But you only helped me back up
To let me fall again and again